Last post, we looked at how environment and ritual can give us a grateful life. We can use those two tools to transform any area of our life we want to focus on. This will be expanded on when my fourth book comes out this fall. So you do not have to wait until then to start creating the life of your dreams, we are going to look at using these two tools on the most important area of our life, our relationships.
If you think about it, the quality of our life is the quality of our relationships. If you have all the wealth and fame in the world but no romantic partner or friends to share it with, your life is going to suck. If you are suffering in poverty and insecurity and you have no partner or friends to help you through, your life will really resemble a flaming dumpster.
Enough of the negativity. Let’s look at what having amazing relationships can do for us. Have you ever received some great news and had to wait to share it with someone special? It feels like you could explode! Why? It is not like the situation will change when you share the news. How about watching sports? Does it feel any different to be sitting at home alone watching the game versus seeing it live with a friend and thousands of other screaming fans? Why is that? Because as human beings, we are wired for connection.
Connection not only amplifies our joy, it halves our sorrow. Have you ever had a tough day at work (silly question) and came home to the embrace of a loved one? How about a stressful family situation and then went out for fun with some friends? Suddenly, the stress is a little less. This is not only good for us physically but will help us address the situation better.
How can we use environment and ritual to improve our relationships? How about scheduling a regular coffee date with that special friend? Maybe cooking a special meal for the one you love? Another great ritual could be sending out a greeting card once a month. Just a card reminding people how amazing they are and how much they mean to you. Do this once a week, and in a year, you will have improved 52 relationships! (Side note our address here at secret2anamazinglife is P.O. Box 333 Oak Creek WI 53154 USA) Not into the whole greeting card thing? Try sending a well-crafted email or post on someone’s social media page.
Environment can be used much the same way. In my first two books, I advocate using a ‘Happy Playlist’ of songs to lift your spirit. You can use the same method to put together a playlist that reminds you of a special friend or the one you love. Can you imagine how you would greet your partner if you listened to a playlist of songs that reminded you of them the whole way home? How about displaying little things that remind you of all the amazing people in your life? Maybe things they gave you, or just something that reminds you of them. Every time you see that object, that special person in your life comes to mind. Every time they come to mind, your appreciation for them grows.
These are only some ways that you can use environment and ritual to create the relationships of your dreams. How would you use the two tools of self-improvement to positively impact your relationships? Share your ideas in the comments below.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 
Back when we all had flip phones, my husband needed emergency brain surgery. We didn’t know what was going on — and the neurosurgeon thought there was even the possibility he could have brain cancer. It was a very overwhelming time. He’s fine, now — but, at the time, my daughter was in club volleyball. They were leaving for a tournament out-of-state. My phone was being bombarded with texts from coaches, parents, family, co-workers and friends, offering arrangements to get my daughter to events and well-wishes. I almost shut my phone off, because it was crazy, but something told me not to — that it could be support that I needed to get me from one minute to the next. The Sunday morning that they were at the tournament, I had a wonderful mom, texting me a point-by-point status of play. Bless her heart. To this day, I am so grateful that I didn’t silence my phone to all those awesome people, just trying to reach out in some way. As I’m typing this, tears are welling up in my eyes, just thinking of it. It’s so easy to want to withdraw sometimes, but, opening the heart to the love reaps immeasurable rewards. I am so grateful for all those texts.
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What a powerful story! Thank you so much for sharing this. Not only is it a testament to the ability of friends and those who care getting us through the toughest times of our lives, but the importance of keeping our hearts, and phones, open to people who are willing to help. Not only did this help you, but by accepting their offers to assist you and your daughter, you must have given them a great feeling too. Who does not like to help others? It gives us such a good feeling. Do not forget, to have all of these amazing people in your life, it shows what a wonderful person you are. Kindness is a reciprocal action. The more we show kindness to others, the more likely it is to return to us. Especially when we need it most. Thank you again for sharing this story with all of us.
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