While discussing relationship issues with a gentleman he brought up a very good analogy for hanging in when life gets tough. I’ll spare you the details of what this was specifically about, but he told me making decisions and giving up too quickly is like throwing away new shoes. My look of confusion most not be as common as i thought. This gentleman saw I had zigged when he zagged. He explained when you first put on me shoes they need to be broken in and can often be even painful the first few days. If you stick with then, however, they break in and become comfortable. Think of your job. How many jobs would you have quit if you had to decide after the first day? I know mine would at least double. So when life seems to be giving you lemons make sure you don’t just need time to turn them into lemonade. Need a reminder? Just look at your shoes.


Last night while working as a dj i was greeted by the company of one of my favorite couples. Both are amazing people and have such a positive light around them. the young lady in this couple came up to me with a very sweet birthday card she had created for me. Inside included a limerick she had writen herself. Gifts created from the heart always mean the most to me and while telling her how touched I was we began discussing special days. Turns out they were celebrating their ten year anniversary that night. Then she said something that caught me a little off guard. She mentioned it was also the anniversary of her father’s death. This wonderful woman is full of charisma and energy and I couldn’t imagine what would have prompted her to choose this day to celebrate her love on. As most emotionally sensitive people tend to be able to do, i believe she picked up on what I must have been thinking. “this way, i was able to turn what was a negative into a positive and I felt as if he was there to give me away” i almost had to stop and take a breath. Taking a day that reminds you of things that may fill you with sorrow and grief and being able to turn that around and fill it with a celebration of love takes both creativity and a large dose of emotional strength. It is easy to hide from days like that and relive the pain, but turning their memory and that day into something positive is extremely difficult, but certainly can increase the joy in your life. This lady is an inspiration and I am honored to be able to call her and the fabulous man in her life my friends.


Recently I moved back to the city i grew up in after 15 years away. It started me thinking of another neighborhood i enjoyed growing up, Mr Rogers neighborhood. Feeling nostalgic i looked up some episodes on YouTube.  The first of which was entitled “be yourself that’s the best” it was very basic in its approach and language as you might expect a children’s show to be. Still in the world we live in of people trying to appear to be something different or “more” than they are, the lesson was deep and valuable.  It started me thinking of how important the basics of self-improvement are. If you are to study the greats in any profession, music, sports they never forget their fundamentals.  Kobe Bryant,  one of the best players of his time takes 300 free throws in practice. Why? Because fundamentals are something we need to be able to do in clutch moments. You cannot hope to master algebra without an understanding of basic math. Much like learning to add joy to your life should not wait until you find yourself depressed or sad.  If you get the fundamentals of happiness down, when life throws you a challenge you will be far better equipped to handle it. The lesson to be learned from all of this? Discover the basic things that make you happy and life joyous, then practice it every day. Make it a part of your life. Then when troubles come knocking you will already have a practice in place to keep the emotional sun shining and it will be a ‘ beautiful day in the neighborhood ‘