I love this quote! Seeing that there is a different way to live can help you level up. Travel does a lot of useful things. It helps us overcome bigotry. Most hate stems from a good deal of ignorance. If you were to get to know how different people and cultures lived, you would find yourself more compassionate and accepting of your neighbors on this planet.
Travel also helps us appreciate all of the things that we do have and enlighten us to that which we can make better. If more people traveled, we could share this very knowledge with each other and work together to make this world a better place even quicker. Travel can be expensive and often difficult. With technology, we can connect with others across the globe easier than ever. We can also visit far away lands and learn about their people.
The internet has caused its fair share of issues. One way in which it can be a benefit to humans is to help connect us with others that we might not have otherwise had the opportunity to meet. We can learn different cultures and what they bring to the world. We can try different recipes and find dishes we enjoy. It can open our eyes to new forms of celebration. It can show us different ways to celebrate our love. In other words, it can show us that our way of living is not the only one available to us. Why not travel today? Literal or virtual.
Great relationships. Most of us would really want one. Some of us would really like our relationship to become one. What is the secret? That is a million dollar question. Actually it is a billion dollar question. The amount of money spent on relationship improvement material in a year is astronomical. That means there is a lot of information out there. One of the great ways to tell if the relationship is a good one is to follow the advice above. Go where you are celebrated and not tolerated. Your value should never be in doubt in your relationship. How do you know if you are valued and celebrated? If only there was some kind of sign.
Thursday, the 29th, was my birthday. I made the mistake of working that day. Upon arriving home, this is what I was greeted with. My beautiful lady created this sign and put balloons up around it and on our front porch. Even better, she was waiting there with a beautiful smile. Taking the time to personally create something meant so much to me. When I pulled up, I felt so special. That was the greatest gift. She used her skills, time and talent to celebrate me. My spirit soared and I had a smile on my face and in my heart. What a great feeling to have on your birthday.
Here is the wonderful thing about that celebration, it continues to this very moment. We are not actively doing something. In fact, we are working in two separate locations. How can the celebration continue? Every time that I think of that sign and those balloons and the time she took to put that all together, I cannot help but smile and feel celebrated. That is how a relationship should be. That can be a friendship, relationship or even a coworker. Celebrating others is a key to strengthening the bond between two people. It doesn’t have to be an adorable sign and balloons. An acknowledging word or genuine compliment can go longer than you think.
The wonderful part about this is that it lasts longer than the actual event. As I mentioned how I continue to smile thinking of the love and effort my lady put into that celebration. The next morning when I pulled out of the driveway to go to work and saw the sign it was a great reminder and gave me a great attitude to start the day. Can you see how celebrating others can be a big part of an amazing relationship? How can you celebrate the people in your life that you really care about?
When it comes to becoming the best version of yourself, Charles Bukowski is not the first name that may come to mind. Like yours truly, he worked for the United States Postal Service. He also shared some of the same opinions of it. He was a drunk and a generally unpleasant person. All of that being said, he does have a good point here. Our mortality should be a great motivation for people to come together. Either they ignore it, put it out of their minds or do not believe death will happen to them. As if they are not subject to the same laws of biology the rest of us are.
When a rather cynical coworker of mine discovered that I also write self-improvement material and am a student of the same, he had an opinion he felt the need to express. “What is the use of trying to improve yourself. We are all just lemmings falling off a cliff. We are all going to die.” I could not argue with him on the last part. Whether we look like a lemming has more to do with who are parents are than how we live our life. This fatalistic view of the world is one that unfortunately far too many people hold. If we are lemmings falling off a cliff, I would argue the point of life is to have the most fun on the way down. You can only have the best life if you are the best version of yourself. That is the entire purpose of self-improvement.
One of the ways in which to improve our life is to embody this quote from old Charlie above. We are all going to die. Do not take too much personally. Do not get hung up on trivial matters. The more rules you have for your enjoyment of life, the less enjoyable your life will be. Instead of finding ways and things in which to be upset, look for and find ways in which to enjoy life. The same holds true for your neighbor. If you want to find reasons to hate your neighbor, you can find them. If you want to find reasons you should invite your neighbor over for a BBQ and a laugh, you will find that too. It is all in what you are looking for.
Charles was right about one thing, we are all going to die. We should use this as motivation. Our time is slipping away right before our eyes. We should find as many ways to drain as much joy out of life as we can. The best way in which we can do that is becoming the best version of ourselves. The best way to have the most enjoyable time with others is to understand that one day we will run out of that time. Use it to laugh. Use it to love. Use it to connect.
Recently, Margie and I found ourselves in a contest for America’s Favorite Couple. When we win, it will give us a nice article in a nationally published magazine as well as some money for our upcoming wedding. It will be a unique chance to share our love story as well as tips for other couples to share and grow their love as well.
As you can see, we made it to the top 15. Below I will share the link if you would like to vote for us. We would be very appreciative for your support.
Have you ever heard the phrase “Growing comforts”? Everyone, however, knows about “growing pains”. That is because growth can be painful. It is almost always difficult. Do you wish to grow in your life? In your career? Do you want to grow the love and the passion with your spouse? Do you want to improve the quality in all of your other relationships? How about improving your health? I am guessing if you read a site called Secret2anamazinglife.com, the answer would be ‘yes’ to all of the above.
Here is where the irony comes in. Everyone wants growth. It is natural. You would like your health to be better. You would like you and your spouse to have a closer and stronger bond. You would like to move ahead in your career. If we all want growth, and we all agree that there are ‘growing pains’, why do so many of us seek a life of comfort? The irony is this – if you seek a life of comfort and ease, it will come back to bite you in the end. Les Brown said it best when he gave us the equation, “If you do what is easy life will be hard, but if you do what is hard, life will be easy.”
Every improvement in our life will take our time, our energy and self-discipline. These things are seldom easy. If we are to seek and do just the things that are easy and give us pleasure, our life will begin to suffer. If you do not put the time and effort into growing the love and connection between you and your spouse, it will not stay the same, it will begin to fade. If you are always looking to cut corners at work, do you think your career path will improve? When the company needs to downsize, who will be at the top of their list? If you do not have the self-discipline when it comes to your health, how long before your body begins to fail you? Sure, it is more pleasurable to not exercise and just eat all of the food that tastes good, but where will that leave our health in five or ten years? You know exactly where you will be.
It is for these reasons that you should choose the path of improvement not the path of ease. There may be some growing pains, but there will be growth.
I hear a good deal of people lamenting the amount of stress they have in their life. In the photo above, there are some good points why that stress exists. Taking a few actions in our life can eliminate a great deal of stress. It may take a hard conversation or hurt feelings on the part of others, but that might be exactly what is needed.
Past relationships should stay in the past. If they continue into the present, it will only lead to trouble. It is like trying to drive while looking in the rearview mirror, you will eventually crash. Prioritizing your self-love is vital. The only person you are guaranteed to spend the rest of your life with is you. If you do not like the person in the mirror, there will be some sleepless nights in your future. Having to say ‘no’ to others to make sure that self-love is taken care of is important. How about envious people? Envy is a terrible emotion. The only thing we should have a strong desire for is to have a better life for ourself. That can only be accomplished by becoming a better version of ourself. People filled with envy often take actions that are immoral. You do not want to be involved in anything like that. You do not want to surround yourself with people focused on the lives of others more than they are on their own life.
As far as letting others have power over our life, it happens more often than you think. This quote above is an example. If you believe you are doing what is right and someone insults you, do you question or even change your course of action? Do you do things just for praise even if it may not be right for your life? Doing what is right and what will improve your life is more important than hearing a compliment from someone else. I know people that have to look online to see what is trending before they make a decision on what to eat, what to wear or a host of other things. Independent thinking is a sign of true strength. It also eliminates a lot of stress and a lot of resentment. When you let others have power over your life, you often resent them even if they are not aware of your feelings. All of this leads to stress you do not need.
As mentioned earlier, taking these actions may ruffle a few feathers. That is the price we must pay for a happier life and a greater deal of inner peace.
These days it would seem that some people relish seeing the downfall of others. Here is a way in which we can put that downfall to use in our own life. Look at what we can learn from that downfall. It can be someone doing something to ruin their reputation and their career. It can be the fall of someone’s marriage. It can be someone ruining their own health. As I have seen recently, someone passing and leaving a legacy of hate and deplorable actions. We can learn from each and every one of these.
We can learn from other’s mistakes because we cannot make them all ourselves. It is also a chance to practice a little compassion. We all make mistakes and do things we regret. If you are reading a site like this, it would be safe to assume that you are trying to make less of them. One way to do so is look at each of these downfalls of others and think of how we can avoid making the same mistakes. Did your friends marriage fall apart over a lack of intimacy or communication? Maybe it would be time to brush up on your own? Did a relative lose their job due to downsizing? It would be a wise idea to brush up on your resume and skills.Lastly, passing away without leaving a decent legacy is something I think we should all keep in mind. The hour of death is always uncertain and we should work hard each day to make a positive difference.
We should never celebrate the downfall of others, but we should learn from as many as we can. Each one can also be an opportunity to help. What can we do for the people in the situations above? The more we learn and help, the better our life will be!
Today is Monday. Regardless of what day you have found this post on, this is a good rule to follow. In a society that wants to be noticed, many people feel the need to say something. Sadly, many of these people say things that are sarcastic, rude or just mean. None of them need be said. We all have days where we are feeling less than optimal. It could have been a lack of sleep, feeling under the weather or just irritated. Whatever the reason, we do not feel social. In this case, it is ok to just be quiet. If you come across someone who is normally social and they tell you they are not up to it, they might just be following this rule.
Taking this up a notch, run what you are about to say through this filter. It even has a nice, handy acronym. If what you are about to say does not fit at least one of these metrics, hopefully more, than it is not really worth saying. If you still feel compelled to speak, than spend some time coming up with something that is one of the above. Let us focus less on being heard and more on providing something worth hearing.
Talk about a secret weapon in the war against mediocrity. A calm mind will allow you to see not only solutions to challenges, but opportunities you may have missed if you were too emotional. Yes, it is good to have enthusiasm. Yes, it is good to be passionate. What is required is to not let those same emotions blind you to certain things. Can you stop and think of areas of your life that remaining calm will give you an advantage over someone who is emotional?
One of the first things that comes to mind is interpersonal relations. Having the ability to remain fairly calm when there is discord between two parties is a super power. The closer these parties are, the more difficult it is to remain calm. It is also the more important it is to do so. Think of a disagreement at the office. How you handle things with your coworkers can affect your life 40 hours a week. It can influence promotions and productivity. How about friendships? Being able to disagree with friends can mean the difference in relationships that take years, and sometimes decades, to develop. Most important, think of your romantic relationship. I believe that lack of proper communication is the cause for most divorce.
Have you ever seen a couple disagreeing so passionately that they forget what they are actually disagreeing about? Have you ever been part of a couple like that? Sometimes, parties may be discussing totally different things. If your partner thinks you are upset about one thing, but you are really upset about something else, can you see how difficult it would be to get that disagreement solved? Often this leads to arguing about the same thing over and over. The solution is to be able to communicate what you are upset about, the solution you would like to see and how to work together to achieve that. They only way to do this is by managing to be calm.
Of course remaining calm in the midst of conflict is easier said than done. Can you see why it would be worth the effort? Even in the internal battles that exist when we are working to be a better version of ourself, the ability to be calm is so helpful. It allows us to be objective and view our life with a healthy detachment. Being able to be honest with ourselves without getting emotional will allow us to make necessary changes. It will allow us to do this without feeling depressed or like a failure. From relationships with others, to the relationship with ourself, being calm is what we should aim to achieve.
Today’s post might be a little ‘sciency’ but do not let that scare you. We will break everything down and go slowly. By the time you digest everything I believe you will have gained information and a valuable tool to help you move closer to an amazing life. Today we are going to talk about sympathetic resonance. Before we get into exactly what that is and how it works, let us talk about us. You, me and every other human that lives and breathes on this planet. As you break down what we are all made of, when you get to the very base of everything, it is made of exactly the same thing – energy. Each person, every object is energy at its most fundamental level. The difference is in the frequency and vibration of that energy.
Consider this quote from one of the smartest men to ever live on the planet. Tesla realized that the secret to everything comes down to the base of what everything is made of energy and the frequency and vibration that energy is in. Before we lose anyone, let us help understand energy on an interpersonal level. Have you ever experienced someone who brought tension into a room simply by entering it? How about those people who make people smile just by their company? You can feel their energy without grasping the quantum physics behind it. The same can be said for how you feel in certain places, listening to certain music, or looking at a certain piece of art. The list is endless. Certain things affect you in certain ways.
Now let us get back to sympathetic resonance. This is a fancy term for saying energy affects like energy. One of the best examples of this can be had using tuning forks. Every tuning fork has a frequency determined by its mass, length and material it is made out of. If you struck a tuning fork next to a group of tuning forks of varying frequencies, only the ones that matched the initial fork would vibrate. It is a cool little trick, but how does that serve us? That is where it gets interesting.
Remember when I said at our basic level we are all made of energy? That we all vibrate at different frequencies? Much like a tuning fork, we will resonate with people of like energy. Here is where things get interesting and how we can put them to use. Unlike a tuning fork, people have many frequencies they vibrate at depending on mood, health, environment and a host of other factors. Even the happiest person has a sad vibration in them. We all have our own fears, triggers and joys that we respond to.
Thinking back to our tuning fork example, we resonate with like-minded energy. That being said, a person’s energy can resonate with certain aspects of ourself. Some of those may be beneficial to us, some may be detrimental. That is why it is paramount to surround ourselves with the best energy we can. Why watch the news over and over? It will look to resonate with our energy of fear or perhaps anger. Spending too much time with that person who is always anger will only cause us to stimulate that anger frequency in us.
You do not need to fully understand sympathetic resonance or the quantum physics behind it to know that the things that surround you affect you. Knowing this, can you see how important it is to select your environment as much as possible? Associate with positive people who are driven. Fill your house with items that bring you peace and joy. We cannot control everything in our life. That is precisely why it is so important to control what we can. The energy that surrounds and affects us is something that we have a great deal of control over. Can you see how this knowledge can help us achieve an amazing life? How you can use an energy cleanse after a stressful situation? How having a house that brings you peace can help leave you more energized?
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 