The day I am writing this marks my return to the gym after dislocating my shoulder. It will have been 2 months. 

It is amazing the changes that have happened in that time.  My energy had disappeared, my clothes are a lot tighter, and things hurt that didn’t before.

With all of those pain issues in my life and all the pleasure in stand to gain by going you can understand how excited I am. I can’t wait to be more energetic, more flexible and look better.

Still there is one thing I am dreading. Is it the soreness the day after?  No. Is it getting ready, driving there and going through all of that?  No again.  Is it wading through the sea of new year fitness people? Nope.  They are usually gone by now.  So what is it?

The hardest thing for me is having to start over.  Before I injured my shoulder is was lifting certain weights, running for certain time and distance. Now after two months off I will have to start from below that. It is hard not to be a little discouraged. Being a motivational speaker this is both a great challenge and opportunity.

So how am I tackling this?  How am I going to stay motivated and not feel discouraged and quit? Several things.  One I’m enlisting help.  My lovely lady is going with me. She is a great source of both encouragement and accountability. I’m also employing anger and frustration. These are emotions I always caution using. Here however, I am going to keep looking in the mirror and seeing how far I have regressed. Doing this will help me keep that fat crying like in the picture above while also being able to note the improvements.

I’m also interested in any motivational techniques you use for working out.  How do you stay focused? What keeps you coming back? Feel free to share with all of our readers in the Comments below. If this post inspired you or you think it would inspire someone you know please feel free to share it with anyone and everyone



When people make resolutions for the new year it is surprising how many are negative. By negative I do not mean we are looking for bad things to happen, but we may too focused on what we wish to get rid of. Such as “I want to quit smoking” “I want to lose 10 pounds” while these are goals are good in and of themselves, they way we have worded them is in the negative. We are quitting smoking. Who wants to be a quitter? We actually want to be no longer controlled by an unhealthy addiction. We want to begin a smoke free lifestyle. Lose 10 pounds? Why? Because we wish to live a healthier life. Some people tell me “I want to stop being depressed all of the time” really they wish to add more joy to there life.

This may seem like splitting hairs, but it is not. All of our motivation comes from two sources. We either want to reduce pain,or increase pleasure. I think using a little of both tends to work the best. I encourage you to write down the reasons WHY you are working towards any goal. Try adding lots of statements including things you will gain by this goal.

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Here is a word I have been accused of using way to often. In reflection there is a lot of truth to that. Even this site is called secret2anamazinglife¬†For a while I began trying to use different words. ‘wonderful’ ‘great’ were some I chose. None really fit the bill, and before long the word ‘amazing’ was coming out of my mouth quite often.

I began to think about why this is. I know it began when trying to think of a name for this site. Amazing seemed to have the power I was looking for. So why do I use it so much? that is a good question. I realized that I view a good amount of things in my life as amazing. I also know that the words you use most often can have a great impact on your life. This is more true than many people believe. Here is a quick test. think of these 3 phrases, perhaps even say them out loud if you happen to be alone or don’t care if people think you are sane or not. First, say “I did something stupid” We have all done something stupid. Said something without thinking. Put our sweater on backwards(I did this just the other day). Ok, now the second one. Say to yourself, or out loud “I am being stupid” There have all been moments I’m sure we felt like this. You are in a bad mood and just acting difficult. Perhaps you have had too much rum and are doing several things you may regret in the morning? Doesn’t it feel different than doing something stupid? A little more intense? Ok, now the last one. Say to yourself or out loud “I am stupid”. How do you feel? hurt? sad? See there is a difference between “Doing something stupid” “feeling stupid” and “Being stupid”.

So how can we use this to improve our lives? Think of times you use the same word. A greeting perhaps? Then think of how you want your life to be. When people ask how I am doing, my answer is almost never ‘fine’ or ‘good’ it is usually ‘living the dream’ ‘legendary’ or yes, ‘amazing’. Words have emotional power. Find some you would like to include in your life and try using them.

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We have all heard this expression, “the rich get richer while the poor get poorer”. This works for a lot of different situations other than money. At first glance this may seem and sound unfair, but upon closer examination it is actually very helpful.

This was brought home by a conversation I had with a new coworker of mine. We were discussing his online classes and he mentioned how one teacher only dictated and there was no interaction. I asked him what he liked least about that. What he told me really got me thinking. He said the part he liked least was the inability to perceive emotion. He said the lesson could really be interpreted differently depending on what mood he was in. He then gave me the example of how if someone sends you and email and you open it in an anger mood some of what they say could seem confrontational where the same email opened in a pleasant mood would not draw those same conclusions.

Here is the interesting part of all this. The same is true on the opposite side. What really is powerful is the fact that this is a self-fulfilling lifestyle. What do I mean about this? Let us play this situation out. You wake up in a bad mood. You start the day by checking your emails. A friend sent you an email letting you know they can’t make the dinner you had planned later in the week. Great you think, he can’t even call me? You feel a little rejected. You grab your coffee and go off to work. “Damn why can’t the car be warm already?” you find yourself thinking. My coffee won’t stay warm for long you think. You begin to think about everything you dislike your job. Suddenly you just want to turn around and go back home to bed. By the time you reach work you are in a less than pleasant state. As you walk in a coworker greets you with a nod. “can’t even say good morning?” Nobody has time for being pleasant you say. This is just the beginning of your day.

Now let’s look at the opposite. You wake up after a good nights sleep in a pleasant mood. You start your day by checking your emails. A friend sent you an email to let you know they can’t make it to the dinner you planned next week. Nice of them to let me know and not just show up, you think. I really must plan something with Joe you say. Feeling grateful your friend let you know ahead of time. You leave feeling thankful for having such considerate friends. You grab your coffee and head off to work. “Damn it’s cold out here, glad I have a car to drive to work” As your driving you are thankful for your hot coffee until the car warms up. By the time you reach work you are feeling pretty good about how many amazing things you have in your life. A coworker greets you with a nod. “Nice he noticed me” you think. feeling you have friendly coworkers. This is just the beginning of your day.

Notice, none of the situations on the outside changed. Just your perception of them and how they made you feel. This may seem extreme to you but it really is not. Being in a bad mood does more than just color your view of the world, it also may cause you to miss out on certain opportunities that may present themselves or friendships that may be available. This is why some of the most successful people tend to be the happiest. It is not because they are grateful they have everything it is because they are grateful for everything they have! This is why it is important to foster an attitude of gratitude and happiness as soon as we are able. Feel free to use the tools presented in this blog as well as discover your own. Also feel free to share any you have in comments below for other readers.

This is why the happy tend to get happier. If you enjoy what you read here please feel free to let us know and to share this with all of your friends.



Yesterday we talked about fighting the battle within. This is why the time to do so is now. Why happiness is not a decision to be made later or thought of only when we lose it.

Why is happiness so important and what is the hurry in putting it into practice? Simply put, life challenges do not call ahead. How often has your phone rang and a voice on the other end tell you “please enjoy this week because next week you will get a flat tire, oh and in the near future your job may be downsizing so you might want to stay looking. Thank you”. Doesn’t happen. Quite often life and it’s peaks and valleys catch us off guard. That is why it is so important to work on increasing the joy in your life right now!

So what can we do? Start putting to together some lists. Movies that make you happy when you watch them. At my seminars I recommend everyone create a “happy cd” or “happy playlist” they can listen to when life gets them down. Think of places you enjoy going, people you enjoy talking to,great blogs by bartender/postal workers you like reading. Seriously, know what makes you happy so when life gets you down you have something that turns it around.

These things may not fix your problems but they will help put them in perspective. If challenges takes you down a few rungs on the ladder of life, at least let them find you standing on the top.

As always please feel free to share this post and tell your friends about it.