Our life is mostly made up of the questions we ask. These questions can be conscious or subconscious, but they exist just the same. We may ask ourselves “Is this good or bad?” or disempowering questions such as “Why does this always happen to me?” Chances are that is doesn’t always happen to you, but if that is the question you are asking, your mind will find examples that support that. In this way your mind is both your best friend and your worst enemy. It will do anything to prove to yourself that you are right. That is the best friend part. It will do so even to the point of having you overlook all the good in your life so that it feels like your life is one big suck fest. That is the worst enemy part.
This is really good news if we know how to use it to our advantage. I go into more depth with this subject in my upcoming book Living the Dream. For today I will just give you the basic tools so you can start putting your mind to work for you. It is really not that complicated at all. It really amounts to changing our question. While I admit this is not very complicated, it does not mean it is easy. We have been asking ourselves the same question so long we often do so without even consciously thinking of it.
So how do we fix this dilemma and begin to use questions to help us live the dream? That in itself is a great question. Some of what I am going to tell you may sound like a little bit of overkill but realize we are working to overcome years, sometimes decades of negative self-programing. We are going to need any advantage that we can muster. Trust in the tools and try them for a month. You really have nothing to lose.
We are not going to struggle against removing the old question. What we are going to do is replace it with a more positive and self-serving question. Here is where you get a chance to be creative. Pick an area of your life you would like to improve. For this example we will use the every popular one, money. If you asked Santa for a thin body and fat bank account last Christmas and he seemed to mix them up, have no fear! We will give the jolly ol’ man a helping hand this year. You are going to think of a question that will focus your mind in the opposite direction. Such as, “How is my life more prosperous every day?” or “How can I add more abundance to my life today?”
Once you have decided on a question, there are two more steps to put your mind to work for you. This next step is very important – write your question down. Some may ask, “Why do I have to do that? I know what it is.” Remember we are working against our imbedded thought patterns. Your mind will do everything to go back to the question it is comfortable with. Write this down on an index card or something else you can carry with you. Another popular way to do this is to make your question your screensaver on your phone. Most of us look at those a million times a day.
The last step is to read your question either out loud or to yourself at 3 very specific times of the day. 1.) When you first get up in the morning. 2.) Right before you go to bed at night. These are the times your mind is most available to suggestion. We are also using biological science to our advantage as well. 3.) One other time during the day. They say doing something for 21 days starts a new habit. I like to round up to one month for 2 reasons. My mind is very stubborn when it comes to change, and I do not like trying to figure out when 21 days are up. If we can just go from the 11th of the month to the 11th of the next month that is a lot easier.
Pick your question today. “What makes me a great parent?” “How can I be a better teacher?” “What reasons do I have to be grateful?” You can see the list can be endless. After 30 days you can either choose to stay with the question you are using and create even more positive change, add another area of life you are looking to improve or go back to having your mind focus on whatever not so inspiring question it chooses. I would love to hear your results on the 11th of next month! Who knows, you might be in my next book!