Tag: self-improvement

THE COST OF YOUR DISTRACTIONS

Have you ever thought of the cost of your distractions? What has that harmless scrolling really cost you? What started as a quick ‘5 minute scroll’ ended up having you hooked for hours. How about binging television shows? You think you will watch just one episode and suddenly your day is over. I hear lots of people justifying this behavior as “I just need to relax.” or “Well I have earned it.” Do not get me wrong, I am not one of those hustle until you die kind of people. Still, we must asking what we could have been doing during that time we were giving to our distractions.

Is it more fun to watch Netflix than clean the house? Undoubtedly. When you put off obligations for pleasures, you still have the stress of undone obligations. It is not just household chores that miss getting done. You could be taking actions that would increase the quality of your health, or your career, or your relationship? That one hour you spent watching videos of cats that look like pop tarts could have been invested in turning your hobby into a business that could add a stream of income. Thinking of ideas to increase the love of you and your partner could have a much greater impact on your life than finding out what the Kardashians are doing.

Do not think wasting one hour a day is such a big deal? If you only waste one hour a day, only on the weekdays, that comes out to 260 hours a week. That is a full 6 and a half 40 hour working weeks you could have invested in bettering your life. Instead of focusing on the pleasure of these mindless distractions, ask yourself what they are costing you. Think of the productive things you could have done with that time.

YOUR WORLD CAN BE BETTER!

In today’s crazy world we are always searching for ways in which we can make our life better. This quote contributed to Confucius is one way. As humans, we are rather predisposed to focus on what needs to be ‘fixed’ in both our lives and the world at large. These days that list has grown rather long. Focusing on these things, especially those we have no control over, can leave us feeling overwhelmed at best and downright depressed at worst.

It is important to look at what needs to be fixed. Especially in our own lives. To be constantly fixated on these events will drain our energy and deplete us emotionally. We need to be motivated and healed by noticing all of the good that surrounds us every day. When we focus on what is good, we notice more of what is good. We begin to see that there is reason to have faith in both the world and the human race. This is important to make sure that we do not let the negative element to win control of our mind and the world at large.

Yes, notice what has to be fixed. Then be thankful and recognize that you do not have to fix everything. Stop to reflect on the beauty and kindness that still exists in this world. Do yourself a favor and remember to keep your mind on the good, even while trying to address the things that are troubling you.

BEING GREAT

Today in the United States we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. day. It is only fitting that we start off with a quote from the man himself. My favorite thing about this quote is that it is a simple, yet effective formula for success. Many people view becoming successful in terms of grand events. Winning the lottery, getting that promotion, losing all the weight they want or whatever they view to be successful. Being great, or successful, is not that complicated.

Take a look at the examples above. Winning the lottery? How about saving or investing the money we would have spent foolishly? Getting that promotion? While we are working to make that happen, we should be doing the best we can at the job we currently have. Putting in a hard days work, whether we are acknowledged for it or not, is being great. How about losing weight? That seems to be on a lot of people’s minds now. It is admirable to be healthy, but understand that even the small things we do will make us great. Saying ‘no’ to the doughnuts in the breakroom is great. Going for a walk after dinner when all we want to do is lay down, that is great.

Doing the ‘small’ things greatly is what prepares us for when the big things arise. If we work to keep our studio apartment in order, guess what will happen when we move into that mansion? If we keep working on passing on the doughnuts, or maybe adding healthy meals to our plate, eventually we will start losing that weight. We are a success long before we reach our goal weight. We are great every time we do not give into temptation. We should celebrate every small step on the way to greatness and make sure we do each one to the best of our ability.

FALL IN LOVE WITH LIFE BY JONATHAN

My next book will be filled with tools and strategies to fall in love with your life. It is with this in mind I have been asking others that very question, “What would you say is the key to falling in love with life?” Today, we are going to look at the answer given me by my coworker Jonathan. It has some great points and it just may help you fall in love with your life a little bit more. Come join me in exploring Jonathan’s answer.

To start, this is a two-part answer. The first thing that Jonathan mentioned was that people need to take care of their necessities. When I pressed him as to why he thought this was so important, he told me that unless your food, shelter and clothing are taken care of, it is hard to focus on what gives you joy. Your mind will always be in survival mode. It is true that if you lost your job or your home, meditation would not be the first thing on your mind. We must make sure our basic needs are met.

The second half of his answer was even more profound. He said it was important to spend time and energy on what makes you happy despite what others may think. He used the example of collecting comic books. If people tell you that hobby is “stupid” or “nerdy”, do it anyway. If what you enjoy brings joy to your soul and does not harm anyone else, pursue it. Sacrificing what we really enjoy to impress others, or even to not offend them, leads to resentment and anger. These feelings are not only projected at others, but at ourselves for denying our joy at the judgement of others.

Do what Jonathan advocates. Take actions to make sure the necessities of life are under control. After that do what sparks joy in your heart and do not worry about the opinions of others.

IT IS NOT ONE MORE, IT IS ONE LESS

This is a change in mindset that could really motivate us. The funny thing is that it is the truth. Often, I use the hourglass as a metaphor for our life. The sand is always going from top to bottom. Just like the time in our life is always fleeting. This should motivate even those who procrastinate the most. You do not get ‘one more day’ on earth, you actually have one less. One less day to leave a meaningful legacy. One less day to love those closest to you. One less day to become the best version of who you can be.

Most of you who follow this blog know that I had a brief flirtation with death not all that long ago. In fact, I did die, but not to ruin the plot of my book, The Beat Goes On, but I came back. That whole experience certainly changed my outlook on life as you might imagine it would. The crazy part is that it was not the actual dying and coming back, but the time leading up to it that had the greatest impact on me. Knowing that in 2 months I would have a surgery that could end my life (I did not know it actually would briefly) was not a scary prospect in terms of me not being here. What really scared me is what I would, or in some cases would not, leave behind.

I thought of the Native American saying, “It is a good day to die.” Meaning that if your life were to end today, would you be happy with the life you lived up to that point? I realized that although I had turned around a great many aspects of my life that I had a long way to go to live a life that I would be at peace leaving. For one, I felt that I had not done enough to leave the world a better place. There was so much more content to create. There were more books to write, more videos to make, and of course more blogs to write. Since that day I have written a blog for nearly 1300 days straight. My fourth book will arrive in 2026. My podcast has moved to YouTube (See Living the Dream with Neil Panosian),

Every day we have one less opportunity. Some days may be tough, others may seem impossible. Even those days we must take advantage of. We must never miss an opportunity to show kindness or lighten the burden of another. We may never have the chance again. How many more opportunities will we have to tell, and more importantly show, those we love how much we care for them? Each day is one less chance. Make the most of today.

THE SECRET OF THE JOURNEY

Most of us have heard this saying. It has become almost cliche. What I want to point out at the start of the week, and the start of a new year is how powerful it can really be. Many people have the goal to regain their health in the new year. Many of these people haven’t put any thought into their health for at least 365 days. Their journey is 1000 miles long – metaphorically. What they must remember is just like walking a thousand miles, you cannot do it any other way than one step at a time.

Another great example is writing a book. After writing three of them you think I would have a great idea of how to stay motivated and disciplined. It may very well be the opposite. When I wrote my first book, A Happy Life for Busy People, I was ignorant to all of the challenges that go into writing a book. I could not dread the editing or formatting because I had never experienced them. Same with any other goal you have tried and failed. What we must focus on is the next step.

The reason I bring this up is because it is far easier to say than do. We must keep this saying in front of us as we make our journey. In walking a thousand miles, some steps will be easier than others. We will be tempted to give up sometimes and driven others. We must realize that each one is one step closer. As we start a new week and a new year, remember to take it one step at a time.

FORGET FINDING, START CREATING!

Here we are, the first Monday of 2026! Let us take a chance to set ourselves up for success. This quote above is a great reminder that we are both the work of art, as well as the artist. We need to stop searching for our purpose, and start deciding what it will be. It can be helpful to consider what we are naturally gifted in and have a passion for. These will make our journey a little less stressful and a lot more enjoyable. We still have to spend some quality time deciding what we want the purpose of our life to be. One great way to do this is by using the ‘write your own eulogy’ exercise outlined in my second book, Living the Dream. We also discussed that a few posts back.

Neale Donald Walsch, despite spelling his first name incorrectly, is an incredible author. He mentioned how many people are looking for a mysterious chalkboard in the sky where God wrote “Your purpose in life is _____” That chalkboard does not exist. We must decide and write it. The great news is once we do decide our purpose, it can make decision making a lot easier. Does this align with my purpose or not? Another thing to consider is that once we decide on our purpose, it is not a life sentence. We can change or adapt our purpose as we grow and develop as human beings.

As we go into a new week, and a new year, let us take some time to decide what we really want to do with our life. What is our purpose? If we cannot decide on a life purpose, we can decide on the purpose of a year, or even a week. What are we going to do with our life this coming week? Will it be to practice the self-care we have been putting off? Maybe take the first step in writing that book, or starting that business? Maybe it is to reach out to some of our friends and let them know we care?

Our life, and our reason for living it, is entirely up to us. It takes some thinking and deciding to settle what that may be. The time spent on this endeavor is worth its weight in gold. It makes our decision making easier and brings a great deal of clarity and purpose to our life. Don’t you owe it to yourself to spend the time making these decisions?

UNDERSTAND BACKWARDS, LIVE FORWARD

With the ending of one year and the beginning of another, there is plenty of time spent in reflection. Many times, as we discussed a few posts ago, we discover that some of our seemingly worst moments have brought us some of our greatest gifts. Life is like that. As it says in the photo above, life can only be understood backwards, but must be lived forward.

Life can be likened to driving a car. For safety, tell you to glance in the rearview mirror every 8 seconds. One of the key words here is ‘glance’. It is important to see what is behind you. It can come up and cause trouble. Same with reflecting on your past. Spending a small amount of time reflecting on your past can serve you. It also lets you know if something in your past can negatively affect your present or your future. The key word here is ‘glance’. If you were to drive constantly focused on your rearview mirror, it would cause considerable issues with you going forward. Same with life, if you were constantly focused on your past, it would prevent you from making the most of your present. It may inevitably cause your present circumstances to crash, as you would do in your car if you drove looking in the rearview mirror.

Just as important is the part about living life forward. We mentioned it is important to glance (about 1 second) in the rearview mirror every 8 seconds. That means spending 7/8 of your time looking forward. Again, this is the same as life. When you drive you look ahead anticipating obstacles, challenges and drivers who do not realize their cars are equipped with turn signals. Then we take the appropriate actions to deal with these upcoming challenges. The same is true with life. We must look ahead and anticipate challenges and take actions to deal with them before they approach. Take that new year’s resolution you made. There will be a challenge to staying committed to that resolution. If we anticipate that in advance, we can take actions in the present to address those. Thus, making it more likely to succeed in our goal.

Will there still be the occasional driver that pulls in front of us without warning? Will there still be people who feel red lights are optional? Yes indeed. That is why looking ahead and anticipating challenges is so important. It will allow us to deal with the unforeseen challenges that much better. It is also the same reason why it is important to glance behind us. Some challenges can sneak up from behind. Same with life. Unexpected challenges can crop up out of nowhere. You anticipate expenditures, but then the water heater goes. You plan a picnic, then you get the flu. We must be prepared to deal with the unexpected. In addition, issues from our past can crop up out of nowhere. We must be prepared for that as well. In life, as well as in the car, remember to glance behind you while you focus on what is in front of you.

WISDOM IS NOT BY CHANCE.

I like this quote. It is as simple as it is profound. A lot of us are beginning to think of what we would like to improve about ourselves in the coming year. Without a good plan of action, many of the goals are merely wishes. You could replace ‘wisdom’ with whatever word you are looking to develop. It could be ‘health’ ‘compassion’ or any other quality worth developing in the new year.

Self-improvement always sounds like a good idea when you are sitting at home on a nice sunny day. “Sure, I will eat better, exercise and improve my mind in the coming year.” You say to yourself as you sit in your sunny kitchen sipping your morning coffee. What happens when you have had a tough day at work, you have to drive home in a winter storm only to discover that your spouse is upset because you came home late. Are you still going to think about how to constructively communicate all of the challenges you faced during the day and why they made you late? It would be a lot easier to snap and feel justified doing so.

What few realize is that self-improvement is not a glamorous road filled with sunshine and rainbows. It is often a gritty, painful transition to a better version of yourself. This includes admitting your wrong, confronting your inner demons and putting in lots of effort often filled with mistakes. It takes a strong belief in who you will become through this effort and a resilience to see it through. This is not easy. It can often leave you in a world of doubt and fear. You doubt if you made the right decision to embark on this journey. You doubt if you have the strength to see it through. You are afraid that you do not.

What eventually happens is that you discover strength that you never knew you had. You learn skills and fortitude that you never knew were inside you. Eventually you become a person far better than you ever thought was possible. The best part? You can use your journey to credibly mentor and help others on their journey. Self-improvement, like wisdom and life in general, is nothing that happens by chance. We must make a commitment and be resolute in our actions. The result is a life, and a person we can be proud of.

GIVE IT UP IN THE NEW YEAR!

With the New Year almost upon us, many are contemplating what resolutions to endeavor on. Personally, this should happen more than once a year, but for many self-improvement is not something that they think about until the end of the year. When people do think of New Year’s resolutions, many think in terms of what they can add to their lives. Is it a new workout routine? Is it a healthier diet? Is it being kinder and more understanding?

All of those are great ambitions, but they all come with a prerequisite. In order for us to add a new routine to our life, or a new constructive habit, we must be willing to give up the habits and mindset that has prevented us from engaging in this behavior in the first place. To use an analogy, it is like trying to sail your boat with the anchor sitting on the ocean floor. As powerful as the wind may be, you will only get so far unless you take in the anchor. Same with trying to engage in new habits. You will only get so far unless you give up the things that hold you down and hold you back.

To give a better example, let us look at the examples we stated earlier in this post. You want to start a new exercise routine. You will have to give up all of the excuses that you use to prevent you from working out. “I don’t have time.” “I am too tired.” or whatever they may be. You want to have a healthier diet? That’s great but unless you give up the Pop Tarts and Mountain Dew, you will be like that boat trying to sail with the anchor down. You want to be kinder and more compassionate? You must give up the office gossip and the temptation to talk poor about others behind their back.

When you are looking to develop a new healthy habit, ask yourself what negative habits that you have to give up in order to give yourself a much better chance of success. In addition, you will see results a lot quicker if you both give up the negative and add the positive.