LIKE NIKE, JUST DO IT!

We are all guilty of this. We have a great idea of something we can do or say that would make someone’s day. Perhaps sending them a check, or a gift. Then, life happens. We get caught up in the daily grind and by the time we remember it the moment has passed. Sometimes we haven’t forgotten at all. Sometimes we are waiting for the right resources to be able to give the ‘perfect gift of kindness’. Then the opportunity or sometimes even the person passes away. What I encourage everyone to do is pick 5 people. Just 5 random people in your life. Think of one small random act of kindness you can do for them RIGHT NOW. Can you send a card thanking them for being in your life? Maybe write them a short letter, or even an email if you don’t want to take the time. Just something to inspire a smile. Maybe you can post a little something to their social media page? Bring them a coffee at work? Invite them out for coffee? There are a million possibilities. All I ask is you put something into action. Feel free to leave your ideas, and even how it turned out in the comments below.

If this inspired you or you would like to see the ideas spread, feel free to share this with your friends, relatives and anyone who follows your social media. Working together we can make the world a more positive place!

WHAT DID YOU PLANT TODAY?

Last post we talked about planting seeds and how long they may take to sprout. What is a good question to begin asking yourself is “What am I planting?”. Quite often our focus depends on what is occurring in our life at the moment. If our life is going well we preoccupy ourselves with thoughts of all the good we have in our life and the good that is coming. We look forward to tomorrow and what is next. Then we hit a bump in the road. Something happens in our life to throw us off center. We then begin to focus our attention on that. We begin to see what it could all effect and how things might get even worse. One of the most difficult things to do, but one of the greatest powers I am learning to harness is living in action instead of reaction.

What do I mean by living in action instead of reaction? It is east to know and to practice things that will make our life successful when things are going well. It is easy to be happy when life is happy. You are simply reflecting your surroundings. You, in essence, are being a mirror. So what happens when life goes south? When a ‘bad’ thing happens? Often it is hard to focus, things seem upside down.

So what should we do? Begin by writing down a vision of what you want your future to look like. Write down the good you are looking forward to coming in the next year. Then daily begin to spend about 2 to 5 minutes a day just imagining what it will be like. Don’t just picture it, but feel it. Keep this and a list of things you are grateful for handy. Each and every day make a habit to look at them ideally twice a day, once when you first get up, and again right before sleep that is when the brain is most suggestive. Then, when hard times hit and you are having a hard time picturing the good in life you will not only be in practice you will have a written script to help you as well.

As always if you enjoyed this post please feel free to share this on social media as well as tell your friends about secret2anamazinglife.com. Together we can make the world a better place for all of us.

WHY AM I NOT SEEING RESULTS?

This is a very interesting story and did a lot to keep me going. Have you ever been working at a goal, giving it your best effort day after day and feel like you’re not getting anywhere? If you have tried to achieve anything I am sure we have all had a point like this. So what can you do when this happens? How do you stay motivated? How do you keep pushing forward when all your efforts seem in vain? It is a question that haunts all of us. I have a little story that may put things into perspective. Something that will allow you to keep pushing forward, and something I have seen in my life recently.

What is this story? It is the story of a Chinese bamboo tree. What does this tree have to do with our life and achieving our goals? A good deal. Let me explain the life cycle of the Chinese bamboo tree. You take a seed and plant it in the ground. You water and fertilize it for a whole year. If you forget the seed will die and you will have to start over. If you are faithful and do so for a whole year, guess what happens? Nothing. Ok, so you stick with it. Fertilize and water it for another 52 weeks. If you stop you know the seed will die. So at the end of the second year you have…nothing. You’ve gone this far so what is another 365 days right? At the end of the third year? Not even a sprout. The fourth year is more of the same. Let’s recap, for four long years you have fertilized and watered and took care of this seed that you are starting to even doubt is still under the ground. So year 5, losing hope you continue your efforts knowing if you stop the seed will die and it will all be for nothing. Something happens in year 5, the tree not only sprouts, it grows 90 FEET IN SIX WEEKS!!

Again, that is a great story about a tree but how does it relate to our life? Everything! Our goals are much like that seed. We plant them and work on them for one year, two years maybe more. We know if we stop and give up on our goals and dreams they will die and not come true. Quite often all of our efforts may be lost and we may have to begin again. Yet, if we stick with it, if we keep working one day we will experience something like the bamboo tree and our goals will explode. We may not see everything that is happening with our efforts. They may seem like that seed deep in the earth, growth is happening but not visible to the eye.

On a personal note I can see this beginning to happen in my own life. I wrote my book. I faithfully create these blog posts daily. Nothing seemed to be happening for years. Now I was featured on a podcast due out soon, I will be appearing at and speaking at the Wisconsin author festival, a book promotion due out in about a week and meetings lined up with several people I could possibly work with to take things to the next level. I even spoke at a wedding recently! All this good fortune could not have happened without the work I had done in the years leading up to that. So if you are not seeing results and you are honestly doing the best you can, giving 120% just remember the story of the mighty bamboo tree.

If you enjoyed this post, or think it may help someone you know feel free to share it on social media, tell your friends and check out and subscribe to my YouTube channel under ‘Neil Panosian’. Also feel free to leave any comments you may have below.

MAKE SURE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THE RIGHT THING

This is something that may be difficult for a lot of people. In fact, when you are under emotional distress it can be difficult for just about anyone, including an author/blog writer/postal worker. When you are having a disagreement the natural urge is to discover who is the one to blame for the upset. I have been guilty of this myself, if you don’t believe me I am sure my beautiful lady would back me up. Here is what I learned, Most of the time the fault is usually shared. Here is something else I have learned, finding out whose fault it is does little or nothing to fix the issue at hand.

So what should you be looking for? A solution, or as the picture above says, a remedy. Ask yourself this question, what would be the ultimate outcome? Let us say your spouse said something that really embarassed you in public. First of all, chances are they did not intend to do so, and if they did you may wish to question your choice of spouse. Now if you argue about whether it was their fault for saying it, or yours for not letting you know that won’t solve you feeling foolish. The ultimate goal here is to have your spouse know what bothers you and to hopefully have the situation not happen in the future.

This takes practice and trust me if you can try it first on an issue that is not so heated it works a lot better. Ask yourself what you would like to happen, what is your goal going forward? Then, ask yourself how you can best recruit your partners help in that matter. Here is a clue, saying “It is your fault” does not often lead to a feeling of cooperation. Rather let them know that you understand they did not mean to upset you and that you both would like to avoid that in the future. Then ask for their help in coming up with a solution. Having them involved creates a feeling of working together. Whether it is an intimate relationship, a friendship or even a coworker you are in this together and things work a lot better if you work together.
This works even better if you can begin by admitting your share of the fault to begin with. That takes the pressure off of everyone. It may also take the fire out of the arguement to some extent. It works even better if you are to follow it up with something like “I would like to work together to make sure we don’t have this problem in the future. What can I do on my end to help that?” To often we like to tell people what they should do, but in reality whether or not that will happen is up to them. Showing that you are willing to work on things on your side demonstrates good faith and a desire to clear up conflict.

So in the 2016 let us work to find remedies, not fault.

ALL ABOUT FOCUS

Let’s talk about what I consider one of the greatest skills one can master and that is focus. I used to give a passing fancy to the subject of focus but recent events and conversations with friends has changed the importance of focus. When I started thinking of it and reflecting on my past it became clear how much of a role focus played.

Have you ever felt like you could have 48 hours in a day and still not get everything you need done? I am sure we all have. One major reason we seem to resemble the hamster in a wheel just running in place and not going anywhere is our focus, or should I say lack of focus. You are starting to clean the house, but then you think of something you wanted to check on Facebook. An hour and several videos about your friend’s pets you realize pretty soon you have to start dinner. You start making dinner and a friend sends you a text about going to lunch. You tell her about how you spent all day trying to clean the house and didn’t get anywhere. 12 messages back and forth and dinner is on pace to be served at midnight.

We all have days like this. Myself included. We have all had the opposite days though, haven’t we? You know when we get lost planting the garden and are suddenly interrupted and look up and have all the rows planted. How does this happen? Focus. When we are focused on the end goal and keep that in front of us our actions become more focused. So how do we stay focused on committed to our goal? I have found something that works for me. Two things really. First, whether it is cleaning the house or getting in shape, create a strong ‘Why’ this will be discussed in greater detail in my next book, but here is the nuts and bolts. WRITE DOWN both what you will gain by doing what you are striving for, and what you will lose by not doing it. I know what you are thinking “So you are giving me even more to do, that is not going to help” Well taking five minutes to do this step will save you stress and grief going forward. I capitalized the first part of that statement because writing it down, especially when it comes to a goal that needs to maintain focus on for long periods of time it is essential to not only keep your goal in front of you but the reasons you need to get it done. Then when your cell phone starts talking to you send it right to voicemail. As Eric Thomas one of my favorite motivational speakers says “most of us would be more successful if we gave up our phone” So keep your goals and reasons in front of you. do this for a week and see what happens. There is one more thing you can do that I learned from major league athletes.

If I were to ask you, “who is the greatest of all time?” A lot of us, especially those of us who follow sports think of Muhammad Ali. Why would we think that? Because he told everybody. More importantly he told himself. That is what he focused on, being the greatest of all time. That is what we all need to do. We need to tell each other and ourselves that we are going to accomplish our goals. Les Brown, another one of my favorite speakers tells us to let ourselves “you got the right stuff” Put that on the mirror. There will be more about becoming the legends we were born to be. For now, focus on what you have to accomplish and why and enjoy the ease in which it seems to happen.

IT IS WORSE THAN WASTING TIME

I am a firm believer in the terrible effects of worry. Many things have been said about the practice of worry and I would like to share some with you now. Early on one of my favorite things I heard about worry is that it is like riding an exercise bike, you get really tired but do not go anywhere. Think of the productive aspect of worry, is there any? Another thing I have heard that I thought powerful was worry not only disturbs our present, but steals our future. It is true. If you spend your time in worry, you are taking time away from productive things you could be doing. The final two things I would like to share with you are this. According to Bob Marley, Complaining and worry are prayers to the devil. Also, worry is mentally rehearsing what we don’t want to happen. If you know anything about the law of attraction it is that thoughts become things, and if your thoughts are focused on that which you do not wish to happen you are giving that all of your energy.

Studies have proved that a full 90% of what we worry about are things we should not be. Things in the past that cannot be changed, useless petty worries and things of the like. So do yourself a favor, use worry to take all the action you can to prepare or address a situation and then let it go. You will lose that knot in your stomach. That feeling of dread and weight you carry around on your shoulders. Try to eliminate worry as much as you can this coming week and see how you feel.

HOW TO BE A SUCCESS EVERY DAY!

I love this quote because it reminds me of something I often forget. A lot of us, myself included, are focused on becoming a success. Personally, I am always focused on reaching more people. This could be how can I have more people attend my seminars, how can I get my book in the hands of more people. Even while I am DJing or bartending I am focused on how to reach more people and inspire them and bring them joy.

This in itself is not a bad thing, but we must remember that true success, like abundance should be felt in every area of our lives. We need to pay as much attention to our personal goals as well as our professional goals. Are you wanting to be the best parent? The best spouse? Perhaps you are looking to become healthier? A better listener? A better communicator? Success takes work in a lot of areas in life.

This may seem like a lot to work on, but that is only half true. What do I mean by this? There are so many opportunities to achieve success. How does that translate to an effective life strategy? Simple, every day you have a chance to be a success. Maybe you were not number one on the bestseller list, but you really made your wife feel loved. You are a success. Maybe you ruined the diet you have been doing good on, but you taught your children a very important lesson.

What this all means is every day there are so many ways to succeed and so many things to feel grateful for. So let us all notice what we can improve on, but let us focus on what we succeed at. It will not only keep us wanting to do more of that, but also make us feel very good about ourselves and what we do for the world.

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!

Who the hell are you? Chances are you had to stop a second and think of the answer to that. What did you come up with? Was your identity attached to your occupation? Was it defined by your family life? Perhaps you chose your faith to define who you are. It is amazing how little focus we spend on who we are. Even less on who we desire to become. Here is a great secret, you have power over that. What do I mean by this? Let me share with you a simple exercise I learned that can help us become the type of person we desire to be. First ask yourself who you wish to be. Keep it simple. One word answers. Come up with three. Once you get started it can be easy to keep going, but pick the 3 most powerful ones for you. By most powerful I mean the ones you really wish to be defined by. Perhaps you wish to be a driven person, but all you seem to drive is other people crazy. write it down. Maybe you want to be energetic, but the only energy you use is the batteries in the remote? write it down. Maybe you would just like to be a happy joyous person, but life always seems to knock you down. write it down.

So now you have a list. In our example it would be driven, energetic and happy Here is all you do, much like the questions from yesterdays post, in fact you can have them on the same sheet of paper, read these three words three times a day. upon waking, before retiring and at least once a day. In addition, read them whenever you seem to be off track. Feeling to lazy to change a channel and find yourself feeling like spending the day on the sofa? Read your list. The boss have you so mad you are seeing red? read the list. It is like reminding yourself of who you are. Not who you want to be, but who you are. It may seem like you are lying to yourself, but deciding who you want to be is a new practice for most of us and our brain may need a gentle reminder.

Again I encourage you to try this for 30 days. If you pair it with the questions from yesterdays post your life is on the fast track to positive change. In a month you will not even recognize the person staring back at you in the mirror! Please stop back and share your results

THREE QUESTIONS THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!

I have three magic questions that will change your life in one month! That is a pretty bold claim I know. Here is how this works, if you answer these three questions three times a day your life will not be the same. Try it once when you wake up, once before you fall asleep and once…well whenever you want. answer three questions three times a day. How long will that take you? Five minutes? Maybe even less? What do you get by dedicating this little time? You will wake up more positive. You will be more focused during the day. Challenges will be easier to overcome. You won’t lose sight of what is really important.

Ok, so you are probably screaming at your computer or cell phone, wherever you read this fabulous blog. I would guess you are screaming “Neil, I want to change my life in the ways you describe. Tell me the damn questions already!” Fair enough. what are these magical questions? In short, I don’t know. Now, before you hit the delete button or become dismayed let me tell you who does know these questions…you. What craziness am I talking? Here is the simple plan. Pick 3 positive questions. Something like “How can I feel grateful in my life today?” “What can I be excited about today?” “What can I do to improve my future today?” You pick, whatever speaks to you. just make sure they are worded in the positive. Now ask yourself these questions in the method we described above, and do your best to come up with an answer or at the very least be on the lookout for one. Do this first thing in the morning and last thing at night plus one other time in between. Do this for 30 days and I promise you that your life will be dramatically different. Again, I challenge you to prove me wrong. Follow these directions to the letter and feel free to stop back here and share how it affected you.

IN OUR DARKEST DAYS

Quite often we find ourselves in a situation we cannot see the good in. Why did this happen? Try as we might we are unable to see the light in the darkness. What to do then? Just accept the fact that life sucks at the moment? If you know anything about me personally I believe feeling what we perceive as negative emotions can be a great learning experience as long as we choose not to live there. So after some head scratching and maybe even a few colorful words what should we do? Take a look around. See what we still have in our lives that haven’t left us. Maybe it is our faith? Maybe it is even our job obligations? Sounds weird, but when we feel on the outside of life looking in, knowing that our job needs and expects us to be there can go from a burden to a blessing.

Here is another great thing to look at. Who is still there. We have all had moments in our lives when things are not going our way. The worst times I can think of is when we don’t live up to our own standard and let those we care about down. Take a look around and see who is still there. They always say you can only see the stars when it is the darkest. Ask yourself, who are the stars in my life? Who shines the brightest when I am at my darkest. be thankful for them. Use the down periods to be grateful for what is left, then focus on reclaiming what you want to be.

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