Tag: People

CLEAN YOUR FILTERS BEFORE SPRING

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This is a quote from Michael Bernard Beckwith, one of my favorite inspirational authors and speakers. Here is what I get from this. Filters, what are they? Well in a furnace they trap dirt and other things from getting through. In  cameras whether video or still, they change the way we look at things. So now we have a clear idea of what filters are. How does all of this affect our lives?

Here is the thing, filters in life, what are they? In short, experiences. You have a powerful experience in colors the way you see life from that point forward. If you were in a relationship and there was a lot of dishonesty that you ended up being hurt by, in the future you may be less likely to trust. In fact, you may see dishonesty where there is none. This as you can imagine, can cause great problems for any new relationships. So like a camera filter it can totally color the way you see the world. If you put a red filter over a camera lens everything looks different. If you look through the filter of past hurts and dishonesty the world looks different than it may actually be.

Here is something else that can act as a filter, belief systems. If you were raised in a certain spiritual belief system you may not understand or accept others. Worse yet, if you were raised with certain prejudices you may have beliefs or dislikes for certain groups of people. This could act like a furnace filter mentioned above. It could trap things from getting through to you. Say you were raised to believe people with red hair were not smart. Then any idea you receive from a person with red hair you would dismiss. This could result in you missing out on a lot of good ideas.

Ok, but filters can also be good. The furnace filter mentioned above traps impurities, which serve as a good thing. I do my best to have a filter in my life against negativity, gossip and judgment. Working with the public, especially in places where alcohol is being served that filter can trap and stop a lot of those impurities and become less effective. So I am going to have to replace or clean that filter. How do we do this? That is a topic we will address in an upcoming post. Until then, look at your own filters. Are there any coloring your world in a negative way? Are there some you could add to color your world in a positive way? Do some need cleaning? Feel free to share any ideas you have for doing so in the comments so are other readers can do so as well. While you are in a sharing mood feel free to share this post in any way you see fit. Thank you for reading and sharing.

TAKE THEM WITH YOU

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This is my current work situation. I find myself at one of my favorite coffee shops ready to share with all of you tips that I have learned to make life a more fun, passionate and successful adventure. If you were to be watching me while waiting in line I would appear to be a man typing on his computer by himself. This, in some versions of reality, is exactly what happens. If you were to crawl inside my head, which I warn you is a scary place to be, you would see the situation much different.

Ok, look at the picture above. You see the card sitting on my computer? It is from my lovely lady. When I write outside of the house I miss her and her adorable face quite a bit. This card she gave me was for one of the sweetest reasons too. So, every time I open my computer to write, there she is. Reminding me I have a sweet loving woman to come home to and that I am working for.

What does all this have to do with your life? How can this help us enjoy life more? Well in a multitude of ways. Whenever we do anything in life we are really never alone. At the supermarket trying to figure out the best price? Thank your math teachers and parents who taught you the skills to do so. As I am writing this blog post I am reminded of many people who gave me the language skills and ability to relate to people. My grandfather was a big influence in my life and I learned a great deal from him as well. In fact, lots of things he tried telling me are only now making sense. He continues to teach me long after he passed away.

He is the idea behind this. Think of people in your life and what they bring to the table. Is there a certain person that cheers you up? If they can’t be with you when you are down or facing a sad day take a picture of them with you. Someone who inspired you to always to your best? Take them with you when you are facing a challenge. I have a friend I saw at a charity run a few years back who had his high school gym shirt on. I asked him why he was wearing it and he told me because it reminded him of when he was young and fit. I had to remind him it still fit so he had to be doing pretty good.

These all may sound crazy to you, but symbols really activate emotion and feeling on a level many things can’t. Weather it is having the help of another who can not be physically present or carrying on the memory of a loved one, symbols can be a great link for us. So next time you see me writing away seemingly by myself know there are really a whole group of people sitting with me. That being said, you can still borrow a chair if you need one.

If this post hit home for you please feel free to share it with others so they may be equally inspired.

THE KEY TO EVERYTHING

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People often ask me what the secret to happiness is. They say they have looked for it everywhere. Some even tell me when they are going to be happy. You know the syndrome, “I’ll be happy when…”. These people fail to miss the big point here. Happiness is not a destination, it is a decision. This occurred to me while I was at the gym the other day. In my seminars I teach people that happiness is like working out. If you are in great shape and you stop, you do not stay in the same shape you start to decline. The same is true for happiness. Happiness is a lifestyle. Then something else occurred to me, so are a lot of things in life. Success, as the famous Earl Nightingale said success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal. Notice the word ‘progressive’ once you decide, you are a success. The moment you make a committed decision your whole life changes. The moment you say to yourself “I am committed to being happy from this day forward” the universe begins to work with you. Think of anything in life, if you have a successful business and you just stop working at it that business will begin to suffer and decline until it is no more. If you achieve a great position in your company and you stop working you will not have that position for long. Another great thing I have learned is how this translates to the world of relationships. Even if you find yourself in a very healthy and loving relationship if you stop working at it and putting effort in, that relationship will begin to deteriorate.

So the good and bad news is this. There is no place you can get to where things will be ‘done’ and you no longer have to do anything. How is that good news? When you realize nothing is permanent you cherish the joy in life more and you are aware even the toughest times will not last. So today make a decision on what you want to be. Do you want to be happy? Do you want to be successful? Then decide it shall be so and keep acting on it until you are there. Once you arrive be thankful for what you have and begin to discover ways to keep it going. Celebrate the destinations to be sure, but more importantly enjoy the journey.

If you enjoyed what you have read here, please feel free to share this post on your social media page and tell all of your friends. Let’s spread the word of positivity together.

MY LEAST FAVORITE WORD

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Anyone who has spent a good deal of time with me, especially my lovely and patient lady, knows there is one word I despise. That word, as you may have guessed from the picture above is ‘try’. Why do I dislike the word ‘try’ so much? Because it weakens us. What do I mean by this? Often people discount the power of the words they use. I have seen this in many situations. Say these two statements out loud. Don’t worry if you are in public, let people wonder. OK, if you are to uncomfortable you can even say them to yourself, but it does drive the point home better out loud. First say “I will try to be healthier in the coming year”. How does that feel? Now, say “I am determined to be healthy this year no matter what it takes”. Feel different? The first one seems to offer a one time shot at something. You will “try” it. If it doesn’t work, well you gave it a shot. The second focuses more on the goal than on the actual act of accomplishing it. If I were to try and become a successful author I may do one or two things and then give up and resign my life to working at the Postal Service. If I am determined to become a best selling author no matter what, than I will keep doing things until I find one that works and reach my goal.

So this coming weekend look for ‘weak’ words in your vocabulary. Limit your use of words such as try, wish, want, and hope. Become determined. Do not give yourself a way out. Remember the sage advice of the Jedi master in the picture above “Do, or do not. There is no try”

Oh, and on a side note. If you would like to assist me in my quest to become a bestselling author and wish to give yourself a great gift, feel free to check out my book A Happy Life for Busy People Aslo feel free to share this post with all of your friends and Facebook followers. Empower them as well.

TRUE GREATNESS

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Let me ask you a question, who do you like to be around? More to the point, what qualities do the people you like to be around the most have? I can tell you what people seem to be a challenge for me. See if you share the same opinions. Being in the customer service industry I have seen my fair share of different people. We all have certain things that tend to bother us more than others. Personally, I am not a fan of negative people. This can fit a few different people. I do not like people I say suffer from the “eyeore syndrome” So named after the loveable character in Winnie the Pooh. (Of which it may be noted I am a big fan) You know the souls who can always see the thunderstorm in any rainbow. It seems if you are full of joy they can find a way to damper it. If you are having a bad day they can bring you down even farther. Funny thing is a lot of these people have no desire to change. Some even wear their depression as a badge of honor. Also are judgmental people. Always finding something negative to say about everyone around them. I look at these people as adult bullies. Most of them are usually making up for a lack of confidence in themselves.

Enough about the people we would like to avoid. How about the people we love to hang around with? I have a friend who is rather financially well off. When we go out he insists on paying for everything. Seems like a sweet deal right? Seldom do I take him up on his offer. Why? You might ask. This is why. He makes a point to let me know how well off he is and when I offer to pay makes sure to remind me that I am not as well off. I have another friend who is not as well off. She always has a joke, loves to take silly pictures and tells me how amazing the people she knows are. When I leave the first person I don’t feel very good about myself even though they have treated me to a night out. Leaving the second person I feel not only good about myself, but about life in general.

What this has taught me is one of the most attractive qualities is helping people see the beauty in themselves and the world around them. It has since become my mission statement. I encourage all of you to be the kind of person who makes others feel positive about the world we all share.

If you enjoyed this post, please feel free to share with your friends and family. Also please feel free to share it to your social media page.

LIKE NIKE, JUST DO IT!

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We are all guilty of this. We have a great idea of something we can do or say that would make someone’s day. Perhaps sending them a check,  or a gift. Then,  life happens.  We get caught up in the daily grind and by the time we remember it the moment has passed.  Sometimes we haven’t forgotten at all. Sometimes we are waiting for the right resources to be able to give the ‘perfect gift of kindness’. Then the opportunity or sometimes even the person passes away. What I encourage everyone to do is pick 5 people. Just 5 random people in your life. Think of one small random act of kindness you can do for them RIGHT NOW. Can you send a card thanking them for being in your life? Maybe write them a short letter, or even an email if you don’t want to take the time. Just something to inspire a smile. Maybe you can post a little something to their social media page? Bring them a coffee at work? Invite them out for coffee? There are a million possibilities. All I ask is you put something into action. Feel free to leave your ideas, and even how it turned out in the comments below.

If this inspired you or you would like to see the ideas spread, feel free to share this with your friends, relatives and anyone who follows your social media. Working together we can make the world a more positive place!

WHAT DID YOU PLANT TODAY?

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Last post we talked about planting seeds and how long they may take to sprout. What is a good question to begin asking yourself is “What am I planting?”. Quite often our focus depends on what is occurring in our life at the moment. If our life is going well we preoccupy ourselves with thoughts of all the good we have in our life and the good that is coming. We look forward to tomorrow and what is next. Then we hit a bump in the road. Something happens in our life to throw us off center. We then begin to focus our attention on that. We begin to see what it could all effect and how things might get even worse. One of the most difficult things to do, but one of the greatest powers I am learning to harness is living in action instead of reaction.

What do I mean by living in action instead of reaction? It is east to know and to practice things that will make our life successful when things are going well. It is easy to be happy when life is happy. You are simply reflecting your surroundings. You, in essence, are being a mirror. So what happens when life goes south? When a ‘bad’ thing happens? Often it is hard to focus, things seem upside down.

So what should we do? Begin by writing down a vision of what you want your future to look like. Write down the good you are looking forward to coming in the next year. Then daily begin to spend about 2 to 5 minutes a day just imagining what it will be like. Don’t just picture it, but feel it. Keep this and a list of things you are grateful for handy. Each and every day make a habit to look at them ideally twice a day, once when you first get up, and again right before sleep that is when the brain is most suggestive. Then, when hard times hit and you are having a hard time picturing the good in life you will not only be in practice you will have a written script to help you as well.

As always if you enjoyed this post please feel free to share this on social media as well as tell your friends about secret2anamazinglife.com. Together we can make the world a better place for all of us.

WHY AM I NOT SEEING RESULTS?

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This is a very interesting story and did a lot to keep me going. Have you ever been working at a goal, giving it your best effort day after day and feel like you’re not getting anywhere? If you have tried to achieve anything I am sure we have all had a point like this. So what can you do when this happens? How do you stay motivated? How do you keep pushing forward when all your efforts seem in vain? It is a question that haunts all of us. I have a little story that may put things into perspective. Something that will allow you to keep pushing forward, and something I have seen in my life recently.

What is this story? It is the story of a Chinese bamboo tree. What does this tree have to do with our life and achieving our goals? A good deal. Let me explain the life cycle of the Chinese bamboo tree. You take a seed and plant it in the ground. You water and fertilize it for a whole year. If you forget the seed will die and you will have to start over. If you are faithful and do so for a whole year, guess what happens? Nothing. Ok, so you stick with it. Fertilize and water it for another 52 weeks. If you stop you know the seed will die. So at the end of the second year you have…nothing. You’ve gone this far so what is another 365 days right? At the end of the third year? Not even a sprout. The fourth year is more of the same. Let’s recap, for four long years you have fertilized and watered and took care of this seed that you are starting to even doubt is still under the ground. So year 5, losing hope you continue your efforts knowing if you stop the seed will die and it will all be for nothing. Something happens in year 5, the tree not only sprouts, it grows 90 FEET IN SIX WEEKS!!

Again, that is a great story about a tree but how does it relate to our life? Everything! Our goals are much like that seed. We plant them and work on them for one year, two years maybe more. We know if we stop and give up on our goals and dreams they will die and not come true. Quite often all of our efforts may be lost and we may have to begin again. Yet, if we stick with it, if we keep working one day we will experience something like the bamboo tree and our goals will explode. We may not see everything that is happening with our efforts. They may seem like that seed deep in the earth, growth is happening but not visible to the eye.

On a personal note I can see this beginning to happen in my own life. I wrote my book. I faithfully create these blog posts daily. Nothing seemed to be happening for years. Now I was featured on a podcast due out soon, I will be appearing at and speaking at the Wisconsin author festival, a book promotion due out in about a week and meetings lined up with several people I could possibly work with to take things to the next level. I even spoke at a wedding recently! All this good fortune could not have happened without the work I had done in the years leading up to that. So if you are not seeing results and you are honestly doing the best you can, giving 120% just remember the story of the mighty bamboo tree.

If you enjoyed this post, or think it may help someone you know feel free to share it on social media, tell your friends and check out and subscribe to my YouTube channel under ‘Neil Panosian’. Also feel free to leave any comments you may have below.

MAKE SURE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THE RIGHT THING

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This is something that may be difficult for a lot of people. In fact, when you are under emotional distress it can be difficult for just about anyone, including an author/blog writer/postal worker. When you are having a disagreement the natural urge is to discover who is the one to blame for the upset. I have been guilty of this myself, if you don’t believe me I am sure my beautiful lady would back me up. Here is what I learned, Most of the time the fault is usually shared. Here is something else I have learned, finding out whose fault it is does little or nothing to fix the issue at hand.

So what should you be looking for? A solution, or as the picture above says, a remedy. Ask yourself this question, what would be the ultimate outcome? Let us say your spouse said something that really embarassed you in public. First of all, chances are they did not intend to do so, and if they did you may wish to question your choice of spouse. Now if you argue about whether it was their fault for saying it, or yours for not letting you know that won’t solve you feeling foolish. The ultimate goal here is to have your spouse know what bothers you and to hopefully have the situation not happen in the future.

This takes practice and trust me if you can try it first on an issue that is not so heated it works a lot better. Ask yourself what you would like to happen, what is your goal going forward? Then, ask yourself how you can best recruit your partners help in that matter. Here is a clue, saying “It is your fault” does not often lead to a feeling of cooperation. Rather let them know that you understand they did not mean to upset you and that you both would like to avoid that in the future. Then ask for their help in coming up with a solution. Having them involved creates a feeling of working together. Whether it is an intimate relationship, a friendship or even a coworker you are in this together and things work a lot better if you work together.
This works even better if you can begin by admitting your share of the fault to begin with. That takes the pressure off of everyone. It may also take the fire out of the arguement to some extent. It works even better if you are to follow it up with something like “I would like to work together to make sure we don’t have this problem in the future. What can I do on my end to help that?” To often we like to tell people what they should do, but in reality whether or not that will happen is up to them. Showing that you are willing to work on things on your side demonstrates good faith and a desire to clear up conflict.

So in the 2016 let us work to find remedies, not fault.

KELLY MEET KELLY

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Time to showcase two more of my amazing friends. Here are two of my good friends. Not only are they both wonderful ladies, they both happened to be named Kelly. They are two people who have brought joy and a fresh perspective into my life. They have some significant differences, but share some great qualities as well.

Kelly B, who is on the left I have known many years. We went to school together. Only in the past few years, however, have I really had the honor of getting to know her well. We both were bartenders at the time and she was throwing a themed party where she worked. Our mutual friend invited me and we began to chat. Through both stopping to see her at her places of work and the wonders of Facebook I discovered she was a stylist. It just so happened at the time I was in need of a haircut and went to her. Over the next few haircuts we learned a lot about each other and she gave me some advice I had shared earlier in this blog. (see Kelly’s words of wisdom May 9th, 2013) Since then she has discovered the love of her life and is the process of celebrating that. Another thing we have in common.

Kelly S, who happens to be the Kelly on the right I have only known about a year. In a short period of time she has brought a lot of laughs into the lives of both myself and my lovely lady Margie. Kelly stopped in at the bar I work on Monday night where I bartend and Margie is the DJ. Not only has she made everyone of our other customers feel at home, she always has a joke and a way to make people laugh. Kelly and I also share books and she has introduced me to several new authors as well as given me feedback on my own book. A final great quality Kelly brings to the table is this, she is always celebrating and cheering on the love I share with the lady in my life. Something that makes us both smile.

Here what I learned from these two ladies. Kelly B has taught me no matter how long you know someone their true treasure and value can only be enjoyed when you take the time to get to know them. Plus, you may have a great friend in your life for years before discovering how wonderful they are. Kelly S has reminded me how important it is to laugh. Showed me ways to make people feel welcome and part of the group. Also gives me someone to celebrate my amazing relationship with.

I am truly blessed to know both of these ladies. If you have a chance to have a friend named Kelly I would suggest you take it.