Monday can be tough for anyone. In addition to what life throws at us, we now have to deal with what the boss throws at us as well. This can leave us feeling drained, and even defeated at the end of the day. It can have us wondering how we can manage to make it to another day. It is important to remember that is where true courage comes from.
Many people think that ‘courage’ means taking on a lofty challenge or goal. It can be that. What is also courage, and often takes a great deal more is to wake up and face another day when you feel you have nothing left. That is also courage. Remember when you put your head on the pillow, head filled with doubts and fears, only to rise another day, that makes you courageous. When you feel you have lost everything that was dear to you, but still you go on. That is courage. When life knocks you down, but you slowly get back up, that makes you courageous.
Sometimes the greatest courage in life is that small voice that whispers to us. That takes courage to listen to.
Just when we both thought i was done with the posts about 6 inches, one more was brought to my attention. I was at the super market dismayed at all of the carts left in the parking lot. The cart attendant informed me of something far worse for them. I could not imagine something worse than a lazy ignorant person who puts there cart up on an island verses walking a few feet to a coral.
The young man looked at me and confessed that did irritate him. “What is worse is when people mix up the small carts with the large ones. ” He went on to explain that they have to pull them all apart and put all the like sizes together before bringing them in the store. “It is really tough in the snow. ” he added.
That is something I could not wrap my head around. Truly if you went to the grocery store and purchased things it would be a safe assumption you had the ability to read. Being that you decided to purchase the 12 mega roll toilet paper verses the 6, it would be safe size differential was not the issue. Yet, here we are. Small carts are put in in area marked ‘large’ and the other way around. The difference between the two sides? Yep, you guessed it, 6 inches.
Again, this turns out not to be an issue of distance, but lack of respect and personal pride. Put your cart back where it goes. Even if that is 6 inches further.
Last post we took a long hard look at our view of discipline and how it can be sabotaging our success. If you did not have a chance to read that, may I strongly suggest that you go back to take a look. Today we are going to look at a somewhat broader category of how we view life in general. It will not only give you the motivation to get more done, but make life a lot more enjoyable. Especially the struggles we all have to go through on our journey of self-improvement.
When we are looking to purchase something, the first question many of us ask is, “What will this cost?” This makes sense. We need to understand how much of our funds, time or effort will this item cost. Is there a more economical option? If so, we generally will gravitate towards that. This holds true for most material things. Then why do any of us buy a diamond ring? Surely there are cheaper options. When I asked my beautiful lady to marry me, I could have got the ring out of a gumball machine. Despite what I told her, that is not what happened. Before we answer why we often purchase more expensive items, let us look at some other examples.
Think of effort. There are things that take a great deal of effort. Working out to get in shape. That takes a lot of effort. Who would want to do that? There are gyms that are always busy though. Speaking of gyms, after the new year they are usually even busier. By February, they are back to their usual amount of people. Why? This can be answered with the mindset we will be discussing. How about healthy eating? How many people start with the best intention and end up with a face full of tacos? Think of projects we begin with great enthusiasm. Maybe a house renovation or even a relationship? Only to find our house the same or with one less person in it.
How can we work to improve success in all of those endeavors and why do we sometimes purchase more expensive items when there are cheaper ones readily available? The picture above does an amazing job of answering that question. Here is how to both increase your chances of success in life as well as making it less stressful. How does that sound for a great equation? Greater success and less stress getting it? Making it through that hard workout without throwing in the towel, literally and figuratively? Will you still be hyperventilating and sweating like a high schooler on exam day? Sure, but you will be doing so with a smile on your face and a determination to stick with it. This will not only help you say ‘no’ to the free doughnuts in the breakroom and stick to your healthy eating goals, but whatever resolution you make on New Year’s Eve or any other day as well.
This change in mindset will also help free you from spending time on things that are not really important to you. The mindset change simply involves asking yourself one different question. Instead of asking yourself “What will this cost me?” switch to asking yourself “What is this worth to me?” In addition to focusing on the destination, it gives purpose to the goal. When you are on the treadmill and your lungs feel like they are about to explode, are you thinking about the pain and discomfort? Most of us are. That is why it is so hard for people to stick with a fitness plan. The next time they are going to the gym they are thinking of everything it is going to cost them. The drive there. The discomfort of their muscles as they are working out. The soreness they will experience after. If you are focused on all of these things, you will not make it long-term.
Now, if you ask yourself, “Is good physical fitness worth it to me?” That will lead to a different focus. Is it worth it to be able to keep up with your kids or grandkids? Is it worth it to be able to go up a flight of stairs without the aid of a team of sherpas and a liter of oxygen? Are the sore muscles worth being able to stand for long periods of time without your back feeling like it is going to break in two? Is the stigma of being the oldest person in the gym worth not being the youngest person in the nursing home?
That is the fitness example. It is pretty straight forward and easy to understand. Here is something a little trickier and more sensitive. It works the same in your relationships. When you think of a relationship there is lots of work involved. This is especially true if you want a deep and successful one. Is it worth sacrificing your happiness for that of your partner or the relationship on occasion? Is having awkward and difficult discussions to establish rules and borders within the relationship? How about the disagreements when you have opposing values? When you focus on these things, staying single seems like a better option.
Now ask yourself questions about worth. Is it worth it to have a person to always come home to? Is it worth it to have someone who often understands you better than you understand yourself? Is having someone you know will always have your back? How about love that will grow and continue to teach you about yourself and life in general? Having someone to wrap your arms around on a cold winter night, is that worth it to you? If it is, you will gladly suffer the costs if you continue to focus on the value and worth of the relationship.
In some of these cases the honest answer may be ‘no’ and that is ok. It would be better for us to know this at the onset. If you tell yourself “I am going to start working out in the new year.” Ask yourself how much is being physically fit worth to you? Is it worth the challenges you will have to overcome? If not, it may be better for you to focus on a goal that is more in line with your value.
Do not take my word on this. Try it for yourself. Trade focusing on cost to focusing on worth and see how much more determination and discipline you will find yourself having. It will also help reduce the stress going through these challenges knowing how much the payoff is worth to you.
We might want to begin by clearing up a little confusion regarding the title of this post. Yes, it does say ‘beaver’ in the title. No, this is not a picture of a beaver. Yes, it is a picture of the moon. It was taken outside of my work this morning. It is known as the ‘Beaver Full Moon’. That is why we used the word beaver in the title. Now that we have all of that straight, let us focus on what it can teach us about life and how to live it better.
Throughout history, there have been many beliefs attached to the full moon. Some based on science. Most based on myth. The one I would take a look at revolves around using the cycles of the moon to focus on different aspects of our lives. This is not about some esoteric or metaphysical thought, but how to use those for a very practical application.
When we are looking to improve our lives, there are really 2 avenues to go about that. We are trying to add healthy attitudes and behaviors and we are also trying to eliminate unhealthy behaviors and attitudes. That is pretty much a given. Trying to do them both at once can be very overwhelming. The metaphysical thought about the moon cycles is that you should use them to focus on one of these at a time. As the moon goes from full to new moon, thus getting smaller, you should focus on things you wish would grow smaller in your life. Eat less junk. Have less negative self-talk. Take your pick. When the moon is going from new moon to full moon, thus getting bigger, you should focus on things you wish to grow in your life. This could be getting more physical activity. It could be showing more gratitude to your partner or in general. Again, this goes for any healthy habit.
I am not sure if the cycle of the moon helps our endeavors or not. What I do know is it is a constant rather large reminder in the sky we can use to help us on our journey of self-improvement. It can also reminder to focus on one side of the coin and then the other. We are less likely to be overwhelmed and more likely to be successful.
One slightly redeeming quality about tragedy is that it provides us an opportunity to make a difference. A chance to step up and help our fellow human beings. Not only fellow humans, but animals, plants and the earth at large.
Recently, most of us know Jamaica was hit by a devastating hurricane. As I see stories of the aftermath, I am reminded how many different areas can be impacted. It saddens me to think many of these people who do not have much to begin with, have lost even that. At the same time,there are great stories of people and companies stepping up to offer free meals and assistance of all kinds!
This certainly isn’t the only place where people are suffering. The war continues in the Ukraine, there are many countries with human rights and starvation issues. Each one of these presenta unique opportunity to help. Make sure you are using a trusted platform to do so. Even if you are unable to do so with your time or money, offering focused thoughts and prayers for people in these affected situations can make a big difference.
Everyday the world presents problems. That means every day we have the opportunity to make a positive difference.
Everyone is looking for the next fad diet. Whether that is for more energy, more muscle or less weight. Here is a diet for more success!That’s right. If you want to get ahead at work, in your health or even in your relationships – start eating elephants!
Of course we are not advocating eating actual elephants. I’m rather fond of the big guys. No, it is a reference, as you see in the first picture, to tackling a big problem. Many of us, myself included, will approach a big goal or challenge and become overwhelmed.
This could be getting in shape, getting out of debt, cleaning up your diet, or even cleaning up the house. We see eight million things we have to do and can’t imagine getting them all done. Instead, we should focus on getting one of them done. You couldn’t eat an entire meal at once, nor can you do much of anything all at once.
Our good friends in the wonderful country of Jamaica are struggling to repair the damage brought by hurricane Melissa. The damage can seem overwhelming. I can only imagine what they are facing. The story is the same. The way to build back is clearing one tree at a time. Helping one family at a time and taking one day at a time.
Even if all you are dealing with is a house that looks like it was hit by a hurricane, it is still one step at a time. You got this!
Do not let the fact that it is Monday stop, or even intimate you. Discover what is holding you back from reaching your goals. Make that your enemy. Remember to focus on what you can control. Placing the blame on outside people and circumstances only puts you under their control and makes you weak.
The truth is most of the time it is not a lack of resources that stop you, but a lack of resourcefulness. Use those people and circumstances for motivation, not for excuses. Do not let them stop you. Find what you can do inside of you to improve your situation and move closer to your goals. You’ve got this!
Many people ask what the secret of success tothe success of my relationship with my beautiful lady is. It is not just focusing on how to create more happy moments, although that is important. Equally important is knowing what to do when the sun doesn’t seem to be shining on your love.
Knowing how to handle the “valleys” of a relationship is just as important as celebrating the “peaks”. Take a look at the list above. It is a good set of rules to have in place to ensure your love lasts a lifetime. Tell me what are some of the rules you have for disagreements that keep your love strong?
This seems to be a lesson as old as time, but one we keep forgetting. It is this divided world, we must remember the “6” or “9” idea. Both can be right depending on your viewpoint and experiences. Both parties can be right and both parties can be different.
Have you ever ran into this in your own life? I know I have. It can be very difficult to understand that someone with a different, and often contrary, opinion to yours could be correct as well. Try to remember the “6” or “9” principle next time you run into this problem.
One of the great strategies I advocate in my second book is writing your own eulogy. It will help you focus on what you want to be remembered for and let you know if you are living a life to be on track for that. If you would like to know more about this exercise and why it could be beneficial to you, feel free to check out my book, Living the Dream, available on Amazon.
With all of the people who have done this exercise, NONE have written anything about material possessions. This is interesting as the group that have done this includes many people, from many different countries with different beliefs and cultures. Still, not a single one wanted their eulogy to include mention of their “stuff”.
The irony in all of this is that we spend our lives in pursuit of pleasure and all of the trappings that go with it. We realize what truly matters in the end, but fail to focus on it. That is part of what makes the human creature a never-ending source of amusement.
Do not make your life all about your stuff. One of my favorite quotes is from Denzel Washington who said, “You never see a U-Haul behind a hearse.” All of the time and effort we spend on stuff and we can’t take it with us. Focus on friends, family and creating memories. That’s what really matters.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 