Tag: attitude

3 KEYS TO THE LIFE YOU WANT

Reaching the life we desire can seem like a long, complicated and difficult road. It should not be. How to be successful is not a great mystery. In fact, it can be accomplished with just 3 words. We will take them one at a time to show you how you can go from the life you have to the life you love quicker than you ever thought possible. If you would like to expand on these ideas, I would suggest grabbing one of my books off Amazon. I will put the link at the end of this post.

The first word is mindset. If there is anything that determines the success or failure of an endeavor, it is the attitude in which it is begun. If you know that there will be challenges and you are prepared to meet them and keep your head up, you are far more likely to succeed than someone who considers every obstacle a closed door. There are many great secrets to improving your mindset. Again, some are included in my book, Living the Dream. There is a whole section on developing a champions mindset. Wherever you find the tools and strategies that work for you, keep learning and developing your mindset.

Bruce Lee brings us our second word – focus. I heard an analogy that really makes it clear. If you hit a tree with an ax in a thousand different places, not much will happen. If, however, you hit that same tree a thousand times in the same place, you will cut down that tree. This can be applied to both our goals and obstacles in life. If we stay focused and apply action in a focused nature, we will achieve them. If we act randomly on several different goals, bouncing from one to another, we will achieve very little if anything at all. As the saying goes, if you try to chase two rabbits at the same time, you will not catch any. This is why multi-tasking is such a fallacy. You would be far better to apply all of your effort towards a single goal and moving on to the next one.

Our third and final key to the life you desire is consistency. Nothing is more frustrating than feeling like we are working forever on a goal and it is no nearer than when we started. As so often is the case, this can best be demonstrated in the realm of fitness. We feel like we have been working out forever and still we resemble that loveable man on the biscuit container. If we are honest with ourselves, we will find the missing key is consistency. We workout on Saturday when we have slept in and had a good breakfast. Monday comes and we are not about to get up early. After our first day of the work week is done, we are feeling exhausted and certainly not up for a workout. One day won’t make a difference, right? Tuesday we have to catch up on all of our errands we were too tired to do on Monday. Here is Hump day, Wednesday, we may pop in the gym for a little workout after work, but don’t have the energy we used to. Friday comes and we have so many social obligations, we just don’t have time for the gym. Next week we will do better we say. Perhaps we do. If we continue in this up down fashion, we are unlikely to see any real results. We must do the actions consistently. This is also helped by having a determined mindset and being focused on achieving the result. As you see, they all go hand in hand.

When it comes to your life, apply these three words to whatever goal you are after and you will be amazed with how quick you will see it materialize. Mindset, focus and consistency are the three keys that will unlock any door. What door are you looking to open and how can you apply these three keys to get there?

CLICK HERE TO GET ANY OR ALL OF MY BOOKS😀

ONE LAST FREEDOM

Remember to exercise this freedom. Our circumstances may be beyond our control. Our spouse, our boss or the person driving next to us may not act as we wish them to. Trying to control that is a waste of time. What would serve us better is to work on controlling our response to their actions. There is a big difference between giving someone the finger and laughing at their lack of consideration and saying, “thanks for helping me practice controlling my anger and growing my patience.”

In case this sounds like something that is only possible to people is easy situations, let’s look at the man who gave us this quote. Victor Frankl was a Jewish psychologist who was imprisoned in a concentration camp. He had his entire family killed, yet still found a way to give himself the motivation to continue. Knowing by surviving, he would be able to tell the story of what happened to him and help prevent it in the future, he was able to endure. His book, Man’s Search for Meaning is a must read.

Next time we think controlling our reaction is beyond our control, remember a man sentenced to death in a concentration camp could manage, so can we.

NO IT DOESN’T SUCK! 🍭

The other day, I had one of those days. You know the ones. A day where everything that could go wrong, does go wrong. In fact, even some things that I did not know could go wrong, went wrong! I worked for hours on a press release only to discover it was the wrong format and would not work. I wrote a really nice blog and published it only to discover I forgot to save the second half before I pushed “publish”. This means it was deleted and now I had a half-written blog out there. At the end of this day, I was finally home relaxing and about to eat dinner on the porch with Margie. I had a can of sparkling green tea. I pulled the tab and can you guess what happened? Nothing! The tab came off and the can was still closed. I stared in disbelief at the can that had added its own bit of betrayal to my already trying day. Did I scream or shout? Did I get disgusted and start to complain about one more thing going wrong? No. I laughed hard and long.

It is not that I am delusional or like a day filled with personal inconveniences. I just knew that getting upset about being betrayed by a can of green tea would only add stress to my life. It would not even help me open the can. Which I did with the end of my fork so I would not add cutting my hand to the challenges of the day. Did my day suck? I guess you could say so. Events turned out the opposite of the way I was hoping it would.

Whenever I have a day that goes south of expectations, I am reminded of something the great Les Brown said. He said, “Never say you are having a terrible day. Say you are having a character building day.” To some of you this may sound like a positive thinking, splitting hairs way of looking at things. To some extent, it is. That is life though. Your language goes a long way to determining your attitude. The only thing we have complete control over is ourselves and our way of looking at the world. Getting upset over situations in which we have no control makes as much sense as trying to keep the sun from setting. (An event I may have tried when I was younger) If you are finding things in your life that seem to suck, remember you have complete control over how you look at your life and the things in it. With a change in your attitude, and an increase in your gratitude, life can feel a whole lot better. Even if your can of green tea doesn’t open on the first try.

FINDING BEAUTY IN HELL

This may be one of the more intense things you read today. I know it is one of the more intense posts I have written in a while. I hope by the time we leave each other today, you will be inspired to look at the world in an entirely different way. The above picture is the outside of a concentration camp from World War II. It still blows my mind how humans can sink to this level of evil towards their fellow human beings. To have a total disregard for the extreme value of human life is beyond me. As you all know, I believe each one of us have a unique gift to bring to the world and a loss of even just one life is too many.

There were so many families that were torn about. Generations that were eliminated from existence in these terrible places. Above is a picture of one man who lived through this nightmare. His name is Viktor Frankl. He was from Austria. As a medical student studying to be a phycologist, he was concerned with the high rate of teen suicide at the time. He set up free clinics in his town that were made available to those who needed them. In 1931, there were no teen suicides thanks in great part to the role of this man. You would think such a caring soul and brilliant mind would be treasured and his programs expanded upon. Sadly, in 1938 Austria became part of the Nazi empire.

In 1942 Viktor married the love of his life. Only nine months later, his entire family were sent to the concentration camp. His father died of starvation. His mother and brother were killed in the gas chamber. His wife died of typhus. Viktor spent 3 long years in the camps. While in there, he practiced what he called logotherapy. One of the aspects of which is that meaning plays a central motivating factor and force in one’s life. He also stated that people find meaning in one of three ways. Making a difference in the world, having particular experiences, or by adopting particular attitudes.

The quote above is a great encapsulation of the book Man’s Search for Meaning. While living in deplorable conditions. Even witnessing the death of his father, his mother, his brother and his wife, Viktor found beauty. Even while being treated as less than human, he found beauty. How on earth was this even possible? One, he was determined that his circumstances, no matter how extremely hellacious they were, would not determine his attitude. He refused to let the evil captures dictate how he was to think. The last freedom, as he stated above, that he had left. He also found beauty in the most extreme situations. One of the examples I found gut-wrenching, yet oddly inspiring, was his story about his soup. The prisoners were given a daily broth of potato water that was somehow supposed to sustain them. One day, while looking in his bowl, he found a potato peel. He celebrated this turn of good fortune as if he had won the lottery. My friend Linda, remembered a story where he saw sunlight shining through a piece of glass and enjoyed the beauty of that.

Man’s Search for Meaning is a book that at once details the unspeakable depths that man can sink to, but also the resilience of the human spirit and will. Everyone should read this book. I think I will do so again shortly. What really stands out to me is, when determined, a man could find beauty in a living hell. When I start to complain about aspects of my life, I think of Victor Frankl. If he could find a beautiful life in the most deplorable conditions, then my inability to find beauty in my own life has less to do with my circumstances and more to do with my attitude.

WHAT WE CAN DO ON A BAD DAY

Bad days, we all have them. Certainly, there are things we can do to minimize the possibility of one occurring, but there are just too many variables for us to contend with. One thing we have complete control over is the state of mind and attitude that we bring to each day. We all know people who can face the worst circumstances and have it bounce off of them like nothing ever happened. There are people who seem to turn every disadvantage to a learning and growing experience. Wouldn’t it be great to be one of those people?

We can! It only takes working on one thing – our attitude. We cannot know what variables are coming our way, nor can we hope to control them all. Trying to control every aspect of our lives, which often includes the lives and opinions of others, will drive us crazy. Just ask any micromanager. All we can control is our attitude towards life and its challenges. The way we do this is to surround ourselves with inspiring things such as calendars, screen savers and pictures. We also listen to empowering things on our daily commute. We read inspiring material. It is even more powerful if we do so to begin our day.

If you want to be a person who does not fall victim to every challenge in life, forget working on controlling everything. Switch your focus on controlling just one thing – your attitude.

STAY POSITIVE THIS WEEKEND!

A quick reminder of the importance of staying positive as you work hard to realize your goals and dreams.

What will you do this weekend to make sure your attitude stays elevated while putting forth the effort to succeed?

HOW MANY DO YOU HAVE?🤔

Middle of the week! In the middle of all our hard work, let us take a second, catch our breath and refocus. Most of us, myself included, do very well at focusing on what needs fixing and what needs to get accomplished. It should be apparent why this would be helpful.

Today, however, let us take just a few minutes for ourselves. Stop whatever we are doing (don’t worry this will be over quickly) and focus on what is going right in our lives. Maybe we are grateful we do not live in a place where there is a war going on. Maybe we are grateful to be healthy. How about the wonderful people in our lives that we love and care about?

Just do this for 2 or 3 minutes. Really do it. Stop whatever else you are doing and just think about everything that is going well and does not need fixing. Can you see how powerful this would be to do on your lunch break? Maybe even while you use the restroom? How about while you wait in line? A quick change in focus can refresh our attitude and our spirit!

IF ONLY WE ALL HAD THIS

Earlier this month I had visited Runaway Bay Jamaica. On the way back to the airport from the hotel I saw this sign above our bus driver. My job retention depends on my positive attitude, great service and the customer’s satisfaction. In my experience, most people I encountered in the country of Jamaica may not have had this sign, but generally followed this thinking.

I am amazed at how many people I encounter that do not realize this is true. Whether I encounter people face to face, as I do when I DJ, or virtually as I do with my YouTube videos and writing, I know I must present a positive attitude, provide some form of great service and meet the customer’s satisfaction. This is true from accountants to Zamboni drivers. Three things that seem so simple, but can be so hard to find. Perhaps we should all have signs to remind us as this Jamaican bus driver did.

Feel free to leave your suggestions in the comments below.  

STAY ON THE SUNNY SIDE OF THE STREET, EVEN IN THE RAIN

This is a picture Margie took of me driving on my way to write. Selfies while driving can be dangerous.

As noted in an earlier post, I have been trying to find things to be grateful for, or things I love while driving. This has not only put me in a better mood, but alerted me to many things on my travel I may have missed. I’ve noticed sounds I love, scents I love. Green lights I’ve been grateful for.

Today on the way to the gym the sun was shinning bright and I was really grateful for that. As I was talking to myself about this (many people probably think I’m on the phone, but really just talking to myself) I noted how everything looks better when it is sunny out. Especially in the Wisconsin winter.

Then I had a strange revelation. The things I were looking at were the same, they were just in the sun. That in itself is not that impressive. As I continued my conversion with the charming author in the car, I realized how much this resembles life. If we bring a positive or sunny attitude you life things look a lot better than if we bring a gloomy or negative attitude. Even if life itself doesn’t change, the way we view it can make all of the difference.

From this point forward I’m going to do my best to stay on the sunny side of the street, even when it is raining.

YOU ARE A CHAMPION

Recently, I had a discussion with a coworker about Billy Alsbrooks, an author and motivational speaker I enjoy. The subject was on being a champion. Mr. Alsbrooks states in his videos that we are all champions. This gentleman took a slight issue with that. “I am not always a champion. Some days I lose my temper and act in ways I shouldn’t.” he informed me. I would like to share with you my reply to him.

I do not pretend to speak for Billy Alsbrooks, but instead will give you my interpretation of his message and how it spoke to me. The first thing that came to mind was the definition of a champion. When people hear the word champion they think of the person holding up the trophy. Someone who did not lose. If you have read my writing for any length of time you will know I look at a champion differently.

To me, a champion is someone who is always learning, always growing. We consider a baseball player with a 300 average a champion. A 300 average means they ‘failed’ 7 out of 10 times! Think of people we call champions today. Lebron James was on a team in Cleveland that could not win a championship. He did not give up. He ended up playing in Miami where he won and then went back to Cleveland to win one there as well. Michael Jordan, who many consider the best player of all time did not make the cut on his high school team. He used that for motivation to work harder and won 6 championships. Tom Brady had to wait until the sixth round to be drafted. Then he was on a team who had a star quarterback. Instead of feeling dejected, he practiced twice as hard. When his time came he took full advantage and has won several championships.

This is not limited to sports. What if I told you there was a child who grew up with a mother and father who were alcoholics and mentally and physically abusive. At one point even having dish soap poured down his throat for something he said. Growing up poor eventually having six fathers and leaving home at 17 what would you predict for his life? Failure? Poverty? Surely there would be a general anger and distrust of people. That man was Tony Robbins who has gone on to be one of the best selling and most inspiring success coaches of all time.

The point is this. Champions are not people who win all of the time. They are those who learn and grow from their challenges and so-called failures. There are days we all don’t live up to our own standards. We lose our temper, we don’t follow through, we are not as productive as we should be. Those things do not mean we are not champions. All they mean is we have lessons to learn and chances to practice improving ourselves. It also serves as a great way to remain humble. Remember other fellow champions have their off days too. Be understanding and use those moments to remind them that they too are champions.

A true champion is not about their standing or their situations, but more about what they do with them.