FIRST SECRET TO HAPPINESS…

“To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness”

-Robert Morely

When facing any challenge from a new job to trying to live a more amazing life, why are we so quick to be hard on ourselves?  I remember training some people at the Post Office who picked things up at a slower pace than the rest of us and I was always very encouraging.  When I was first learning, however, I recall being upset with myself for every little mistake.  Now if it was somebody else and they did it, I would remind them that we all make mistakes and the important thing is to keep trying. Keep going towards your goal.  So why are we so hard on ourselves? It has been said we are always hardest on those closest to us, and if that statement holds true I suppose it would make sense that we are our own worst critics.  I have a friend who is working on getting back in shape and she recently missed going to the gym for three whole days.  I heard her say things like “It’s no use, I’ll never get back in shape” and “why can’t I just stick with things?”. We share a mutual friend who is also trying to live a healthier lifestyle and I asked her what she would say if she heard her saying the same thing.  After a long pause she looked at me and yelled “It’s not the same!” I kind of chuckled, which really did not help the situation any, but then I told her “give yourself a break” and told her to encourage herself and give herself a little pep talk.  “Give myself a pep talk? That sounds silly” was her reply.  I asked her if it was any crazier then yelling at yourself.  She thought for a minute and then started laughing. “I guess not, maybe you’re right” she said. Ok, so after that we did have an ice cream cone, but she assured herself that was ok, and she was recommitted to her fitness routine.

Now I am not saying it is not constructive to hold yourself responsible for failing to do something you have set out to do.  Just don’t continue to beat yourself up over it.  This week let us treat ourselves like we would treat our best friends.  After all, we are stuck with ourselves for the rest of our lives, we might as well be friends.  You wouldn’t continue to stay with someone who yelled and criticized you every day, would you? No, you would tell them to get lost, you don’t deserve to be treated that way. So next time your inner critic comes calling, tell them the same thing. Say to yourself “I deserve to be treated better than this” because you are amazing and you do! Enjoy your week my friends!

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