Tag: Scientology

ANOTHER FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTION…

Ok, this title is kind of a lie. This is more like a frequently heard statement. When I start talking happiness and positivity to some people the response I get is something along the lines of “I’ll be happy when I win the lottery” or “I’ll be happy when I finally get a car that runs decent” more money, more health, more friends. Yes all those things can add joy to our lives. Those things can also be taken from us. True happiness is something that happens within. Positivity is an outlook and a journey, not an event or a destination. I know this sounds rather ‘new age’ and fluffy. In fact before I started this journey myself I would’ve argued happiness can be found at the bottom of a glass of rum. On a tough day at the post office, you may still get that argument. To better explain the theory that happiness is an inside job, let me cite a quote from a great modern-day philosopher

“Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body”

George Carlin

Does wearing a cross around your neck make you a more spiritual person? No more than wearing your favorite players jersey would make you a great athlete. Our spirituality, our happiness, very few things are more important to us. So why let your happiness be determined by outside factors? If you develop inner joy and then win the lottery imagine how much happier you would be? What if you develop inner happiness and then lose your job? How much better would you be equipped to handle that? Truth be told I may discover one of both of those here in a short period of time. The point here is in order to have a sense of peace and joy you can count on, you must develop it within. You cannot make it dependent on outside factors. You must take control over the important things in your life. Your happiness should be one of those areas.

IT DOESN’T JUST HAPPEN

Sometime in our life we went from being the adventure seeking young child, to the adult waiting for life to happen to us.  A view that also affects our view of happiness. I was told the other day that someone was “Never happy, but it’s not their fault because nothing ‘happy’ ever happens to them”.  Here is when a slight change in perception can make all the difference.  Going back to that adventurous toddler, when we are young, we seek out happiness, we don’t just sit in our cribs and wait for it to ‘happen to us’ much to the chagrin of our parents.  When we grow older, however, lots of us just sit in the house and watch tv waiting for something happy to happen.  Here is when a good definition of what happy means to you would certainly help.  While enjoying a cup of coffee at the local Starbucks with a group of friends the other day, I asked them what would make them happy. There were two very different kinds of happiness expressed.  There was what I shall call ‘high excitement’ happiness. The “brand new sports car” “winning the lottery” “night in Vegas” to the ‘low excitement’ variety, “having the dishes done” “a good book and a bottle of wine” “a nice long walk in the woods with my dog”.  Although these answers are very different, they both work for the people who said them. So I asked, why are you not working toward saving for that trip to Vegas? How about working with you spouse to schedule some time alone for a book and a glass of wine.  Sometimes we forget a little pursuing on our behalf, and a change in perspective can make all the difference. Plus, let’s be honest, we all deserve it! Have an amazing day my friends!

THE TIME IS NOW!!

“My creed is: Happiness is the only good. The place to be happy is here. The time to be happy is now. The way to be happy is to make others so.”

-Robert Ingersoll

During breakfast the other day I was part of a conversation as to the obligation to keep company with people and situations that do not bring you joy.  To me the notion that you should subject yourself to unpleasant situations merely because that person is your relative, or the situation is something ‘everyone expects you to be at’ is to me antiquated and ridiculous.  So I am giving you all an excuse now.  If the person or situation does not give you joy, don’t be around them. The reason here is really two-fold. First, we were given this life to enjoy.  If you are not enjoying your life, you are wasting your life. Second, you can’t very well bring joy to others if you, yourself are not full of joy.  I am not saying there are not people and moments that may be less than a thrill (the dentist comes to mind for me) but if you have honestly done your best to bring joy to the situation and it does not seem to be taking hold, then it is not in line with you living a positive rewarding life.  To suffer through an evening with relatives or people you do not enjoy merely out of a sense of obligation does nobody any good.  It does not bring joy to the people you are with as it is usually apparent you are not enjoying yourself.  Not to mention the joy you could be having and experiencing with good friends.  So next time you find yourself dreading another situation ask yourself if you are doing it merely because you feel obligated, and will your presence there do any good? If that is indeed the case, my suggestion is to politely excuse yourself and treat yourself to an evening of fun. Whatever you do, feeling guilty should not be it. Remember if it doesn’t bring you joy, it certainly won’t bring others joy either.