To catch you up to date, we are doing a month of gratitude. Today is day 2. Feel free to go back and read yesterday’s post as well. We love to hear your answers in the comments that follow today’s post.
Ah technology. Many people curse this, but few stop and appreciate all we have to be thankful for. Personally, I have many. We will start with a popular one – cell phones. Yes, they have their drawbacks, but think of all they bring us. I can stay in contact with my lovely lady. That helps me worry less. You can retrieve information at the drop of a hat. It reduces the amount of graffiti on rest room stalls.
I also love the technology in my new car. I am not a fan of the cold weather. My new car allows me to start the car from my cell phone! By the time I get in, the heated seats and steering wheel are already warm. Two more technology items I am grateful for! They make winter so much more!
How about you? What technology are you especially grateful for? There are so many to choose from! I would love to hear what you think!
Above is a list of 30 days of gratitude. We did this a few year’s back and many of you asked for a repeat. We are going to take one day at a time. I’ll share my personal answer and you are welcome to do the same. Each day we will explore something new to be gratefulfor!
Our first answer involves one of the most powerful senses – smell! Do you know often realtors bake chocolate chip cookies in houses they are showing? It gives the perspective buyers a feeling of home. Smells have a unique path in our brains. That is why a scent can bring up a memory.
There are many different smells I am grateful for. I love the smell of damp earth when I am walking out in nature. I love the smell of a diner when you walk in. That mix of eggs, toast and coffee. I love the scents of coconut and vanilla. Anything that reminds me of vacation.
How about you? What are some of the smells you are grateful for? Are there some that bring back great memories? Share with us in the comments below!
I like this quote. It is an easy way for us to think when we encounter a challenge in life. It is much like encountering a closed road. We would not throw our hands up and abandon the trip. We should do the same for our life and our goals. We can adjust the route. Maybe take a detour, but keep our eyes on the destination.
This year, let us embrace the detours and see what we can learn along the way. Success is never linear. When we experience a delay, it is not a denial. It just may be a detour. Although these are seldom appreciated at the moment, it may be just what we need.
One of my best skills, and the one I am asked about most often, is the ability to develop rapport with others. For years I recommended reading How to Win Friends and Influence People. That is my favorite book and I have read no less than 10 times. It has some great clues, but did not give the full picture.
Dale Carnegie was not the relationship master I had solely drawn from. The other was notorious for not having good relationships. Clues were exactly what lead to this revelation while I was in the shower moments ago. It seems that is where all of our good thinking happens.
One of my favorite movies of my youth was Young Sherlock Holmes. It gives the childhood back story of one of the world’s greatest detectives. That, my friends, is exactly what creating rapport and fostering great relationships takes! You must become a great detective.
In Sherlock Holmes stories and movies, he always tells you the observations and assertions he uses to solve a case. People are one big detective case in themselves. The more we observe to learn, the better our chances of a great interaction with them will be.
This can be noticing small details such as what their clothes can tell you. Are they using their right or left hand predominantly? What turn of phrase do they seem to use often? They may not give us all of the answers, but can give us clues to explore.
We could spend hours breaking this down, but instead I encourage you to try it out today. Give yourself two distinct challenges. First, pick a person you do not know that well. It could be a person you run into in a service capacity, a coworker or anyone else. Make as many observations on them as you can. Take mental notes and see what they can tell you by putting them all together. Tougher still, try doing this with someone you already know. See what things you can learn that you don’t already know. The better you know them, the tougher the case, but the bigger the rewards!
Treating relationships as cases to be solved may sound rather crude, but it can lead to an astounding deepening of connection. It may also surprise you with how many things you miss. Clues that can make cheering them up, buying the perfect gift and growing closer to them easier than you could ever imagine.
This picture, or group of pictures, is truly worth 1000 words. How many of us are like this lady? Chasing all of the material goods, grabbing all that we can. Then, with arms full, she discovers she has reached the end of her life. She does have an arm full of riches,but what good will it do her then? The moral here is fairly obvious. Do not spend you whole life just chasing material wealth.
There are 2 other points that are important to add to this. First, while she is chasing the material goods, her eyes are locked onto what she is chasing. Not looking at the green grass, the blue sky or anything else. I’m not sure if that was intentionally done by the artist, but it makes a good point. How many of us focus on chasing what we do not have, never stopping to look at all the beauty around us? We settle for a feeling of lack. Instead, we should focus on the wealth we do have. That could be the love of our family, friends or someone special. If you are really lucky, like me, you have all three! The wealth of health. Even if it is not perfect, we are still blessed with a great amount of it.
The other point is that she is old in the last picture. Either that or she died her hair Grey. This is really a best case scenario. We never know when we will reach ‘the end’ sign in our life. That is why it is so important to enjoy the journey. Be thankful for what you do have while chasing what you want.
Many of us, dare I say most, do not like having their picture taken. When I look at my picture, it usually resembles some kind of mutant from a B-movie. It doesn’t help the case that the lady in my life, whom I am usually lucky enough to be standing by, is one of those fortunate souls that looks amazing no matter what.
If we put our egos and vanity aside, we must ask ourselves what the purpose of pictures is even for. It is usually to capture a moment or a memory. Sadly, lately Margie and I seem to be attending quite a few funerals. One of the things you see at most of them is picture boards featuring memories of the deceased. When you see people looking at them, it is one of the few moments people are smiling. For a brief moment they are taken back to a moment they shared with the person they are now missing so much.
Wouldn’t it be a shame if there were few, or none, of these memories available? Sure we may be caught making a silly face, or scratching our butt, but that is what makes life amusing. Having those memories will serve as little treasuresof joy when the pain of loss seems unbearable.
This year, feel free to capture as many memories as you can. Even little videos where you have the sound of someone’s voice. Make your appearance in them, even if you think you look like you came from a B-movie set or are scratching your backside. It would be a shame to be left with no memories and then it’s too late.
This quote from Alice In Wonderland applies as much to the real world as to the world of Wonderland. How many times throughout the day do you encounter someone and say to yourself “That person must be mad!“Usually it might be something a little more verbally intense, but in the same vein.
This is the interesting thing about this whole situation. You could really benefit by thinking of the real world as some kind of Wonderland! That grumpy coworker is just a character in the story. It may even help to imagine them looking the part. Challenges at the office turn into situations you have to overcome to get home. Just like Alice did when she was stuck in Wonderland!
This shift in the way you look at the world may not seem like such a big thing. It may even seem a little silly, but that’s the point. If you can go from stressed and angry to amused and silly, that is a win for you and your life! Imagine your life as some kind of fantastical fairytale world and all of the people in it characters. It will lessen the stress and increase the amusement.
This picture was taken during a nighttime walk with my mother at a local park. We walk here a lot during the day. Despite my best efforts against it, she will often walk alone at night. This evening, I joined her, and it was truly a much different experience than during the day. We were not able to see as far as we normally were. Things we could make out during the day appeared as black silhouettes.
You may think this would make it a lesser experience. Not so. Our senses of hearing were more developed and we noticed sounds we may miss during the day. The photo above is of the local water tower.During the day it is just a water tower, but at night it looked almost mystical. Something we could only appreciate at night.
This walk was a great reminder to get a shift in perspective on what you normally see. It can help you appreciate things you may miss. We walk this park countless times during the day, but the evening made it an entirely different experience. Have you ever had such an experience?
A few months ago I hired a personal trainer at my gym. About a month ago, she quit. Hopefully that is no reflection on me as a client. A new trainer, Mia, was assigned to me. Being very thorough, she sat down with me to better understand me and my fitness goals. One of the questions she asked was what my favorite piece of equipment was at the gym. After some deep reflection, I answered her honestly and said “The massage bed is great.”
After a chuckle between us, I answered with a few machines. Here is the lesson in this. The massage bed is great. Helps you relax and feel good. This is true of so many things in life. The help us feel comfortable. The other machines at the gym wear you out and can leave you sore for days. Just like challenges in life. Many things we do will be uncomfortable and could even hurt mentally, emotionally, or even physically long after the event is over.
Why even bother with any of that? Why not stick to only things that are easy and comfortable? In one word, growth. What kind of shape would I be in if the only machine I used at the gym was the massage bed?Sure I would be comfortable at the time, but when the time came to do anything physical, I would be no better off and may even be worse. Using the machines that cause momentary discomfort will allow our muscles to grow and be better in the future.
This is also the way it works in life. If we only stick to things that make us comfortable we will be no stronger of a person when challenges come. In fact, we may even be weaker. It is not fun to have that difficult conversation or make those tough decisions. It is easier to stay in bed than get up to go to work or clean the house. Still, it makes our life easier in the long term. Think of this next time you have to decide on your favorite discomfort.
I’m not sure how your New Year started, but I decided to set mine up for a great start. Margie and I are usually so busy it feels we only see each other in passing. To this end, I booked a hotel getaway for us. Just one night, but that way we could relax without a care and enjoy each other. There was a nice restaurant we went to. The server was quite friendly and helpful. We went back to the hotel to enjoy the swimming pool and hot tub.
Seems like a nice end to the evening. At roughly 11:30 pm, Margie was in the hot tub and I was swimming in the deep end of the cold pool. If you know anything about us, this is opposite of what you should expect. I saw a quarter at the bottom of the pool and dove down for it. As I move my arm to swim, I heard a terrible sound that can only be described asmeat being ripped off the bone. I knew exactly what it was. My shoulder had been ripped out of itssocket.
After what Margie called “blood-curdling scream”, i made it out of the pool. We went up to the room so I could dry off and change as I didn’t want to go in wet swim trunks. I also gave myself a shot of cologne so I wouldn’t offend. I’ll spare you the events of trip other than it was painful. Throughout this, however, I was given several great gifts.
The first was the paramedics in the ambulance. Cyrus was the man helping me. I knew they were away from their families that night and I really appreciated their efforts to assist me. You might be thinking, “that’s their job Neil.” You would be right, but without them, it wouldhave been a long trip to the hospital.
The nurses and doctor made sure to get me what I needed and knocked me out to put my shoulder back in place. My mother came in the wee hours of the morning to take us back to the hotel. Throughout that night, and the following morning at the breakfast buffet at the hotel, my beautiful lady was so helpful.
The point of this is that even though I was in some intense pain, and it rather ruined our calm getaway for the new year, there were so many gifts around me. The amazing medical staff, my mother and of course my beautiful lady who continues to be such a great help. In our darkest hours,it always helps to focus on the light. There will be weeks of rehab ahead and I’m going to do my best to show appreciation to those who are there for me!
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 