Have you ever thought of feeding your spirit or your intellect? We make time to eat every day. We need to do so in order to survive. If you are reading a website like this, it is my guess you are looking to do more than just survive, you are looking to thrive. The way we do that is by making time to feed both our spirit and our intellect. We should work on composing a list of things that do both. Do you enjoy reading books that teach you something new? How about listening to a podcast that can give you a new perspective? How about watching a YouTube video to brush up on a skill or learn a new one? These are all ways in which we can feed our intellect.
Feeding our spirit may take a little thought, but it is just as important. If you feed your intellect, you may be more knowledgeable. What good would it be to be full of knowledge if you are also full of depression and anxiety? Increasing your brain power is no good if you do not increase your inspiration and inner peace. This can be done taking a walk in nature, viewing a piece of art, meditating or listening to a certain piece of music. Whatever speaks to your spirit. It can even be hanging out with certain people.
We eat three meals a day. We should take time to have one ‘meal’ a day for our spirit and our intellect. How about you? Do you feed all three aspects of your life? Can you think of ways in which you can do so?
Sometimes the oldest wisdom can enlighten us most in the present. Take a look at this quote from a Stoic Philosopher. Far too many young people place their value on ‘likes’ on social media. There are people who look at career advancement as a measure of success. Some view the number in a bank balance as an indicator of a successful life. All of these have variables that can slip out of our control. How many people ‘like’ something we put out on social media has so many variables that it is beyond comprehension. It is certainly not an indicator as to the quality of the content. Career advancement? Things such as market volatility, nepotism, and office politics can influence that. Bank balances? One health emergency and that can be upended.
Instead, focus on what we can control. Take the social media example. If you focus on putting out quality content verses likes, when you do have a post go viral, there will be no concern if it will be a good one. The best way to boost your readership is to write something worth reading. Career advancement? Becoming the most valuable employee you can be is something you can control. Learn as much as you can. Develop your people skills. Give them no choice but to promote you. If they still decide to go with their brother instead, you will be positioned to succeed somewhere else. Bank balances? Increasing your financial knowledge and skill is one of the best ways to insure yourself against catastrophe. Even if an emergency wipes out your savings, you will have the knowledge and skills needed to rebuild again, and do so in less time than most.
Whether your concern in life is finance, relationships or legacy, your best course of action is focusing on what you can control. In every situation there are things that are in our control and things that are not. To place value on the former, means less control in your life. To place value on the latter means more control. In the simplest of terms, one of the best things to focus on and put value on is becoming the best version of yourself. In that regard, no matter what outside circumstances hold, you are best positioned for success.
This may seem like a morbid thought, but it is actually rather motivating. There is a classic Latin saying that says, “Death is certain. The hour uncertain.” It can come at anytime. Delayed gratification certainly has its place in self-improvement, but it must not come at the cost of our inner peace and joy. While we are striving to become the best version of ourselves, we must do our best to enjoy the process. While you look forward to the future, enjoy the present.
Another way of looking at these sayings is that we should take nothing for granted. Our health, the love we share with our spouse, the friendships we have. Even our job and boss that may drive us crazy at times, can be taken away in a heartbeat. Every ability we have. Every simple pleasure and even every annoyance, can be gone in a second. You may think challenges and problems would be great to be gone. In a strange way, they bring their own kind of joy. If you face a small daily challenge, overcoming that gives you a small victory every day. That is something to be celebrated.
When we delay our happiness until something happens, we live a life of wanting. If we can find joy in the waiting, our life becomes one long celebration. Enjoy the destination as well as the journey. That is the secret to an amazing life. The more moments you can find to celebrate, the better. How can you live a little in the moment? Are you guilty of postponing your happiness? Have you found ways to enjoy the journey? We would love to hear your story!
A few months ago we have a 30 day gratitude challenge. One of the things that we did not touch on was the question, “What failure are you grateful for?” Most people are familiar with finding good things to be grateful for. It is even rather easy to see how you can be grateful for things that seem benign. Things that we take for granted every day. Such as having a working toilet or clean water. Once we stop and ponder how things would be without them, we find it rather easy to be grateful for them.
What takes a little work is discovering ways in which we can be grateful for the seemingly negative things in our life. I used the word ‘seemingly’ for a reason. On the surface, and certainly at the time, many things can seem negative. We feel hurt, embarrassment or pain. At the moment these things happen, the last emotion we are thinking about feeling is gratitude. How can you feel grateful for failing a test? How about the failure of a relationship? This is becomes even more difficult the longer that relationship has existed. Whether it is a best friend, a lover or a family member. How about failing at work? That can feel terrible. Each one of these, if properly reflected on, can give us a lot to be grateful for.
Failing a test can teach us, and motivate us to study harder. It can open our eyes to what we thought we knew that perhaps we were not as well versed on as we thought. A failure of a relationship can be a tricky one. If we are honest in our reflection, it can teach us a lot. Could we use some work on our interpersonal skills? Our communication? Should we be a more shrewd judge of character? Do we need to be better at setting boundaries? Are we actually better off in the long run without this person in our life? These are all lessons that cannot be learned without a failure of some kind. In fact, no lesson can be learned without failure. It serves as one of the best teachers.
If we fail at our job, it brings many questions to mind. Were we not prepared as well as we should have been? Are there additional skills we need to learn? Perhaps that career field is not one we are best cut out for? Things we again may never know without experiencing failure. We can use the tools of an open mind and honest reflection to transform any seeming failure into one of the most powerful educating moments of our life. Can you think of a failure that you are grateful for?
Today the country of the United States is celebrating its 250th birthday. How accurate that is depends on how you score it. We really did not gain recognition as independent from Britain until 1783. The constitution, which defined the government, was ratified a few years after that. More accurately, it is being described as “The birth of a nation”. What that means is that we are celebrating the brave men above who risked death by signing a document telling the King we no longer wanted him around. In other words, we declared our intent to become independent.
Considering the other dates that I listed above, and the fact that there was a bloody war between the two sides, this declaration was no small thing. It is worth celebrating 250 years later. How does this apply to us? What have you declared in your life? Have you been brave enough to write it down and show it to others? You may not risk death by declaring the start of a health journey or writing down your commitment to your physical fitness. What it will hopefully do is keep you committed. That translates to something very important. When you are committed, you stay true to the goal long after the motivation to do so has passed. Do not want to eat healthy after a long work day? You have a written declaration to do so. Do not want to go to the gym because you are too sore from the last time? You wrote down a declaration, maybe even let others see it, that you were going to commit to that.
What have you declared in your life? Have you stayed true to it, even when you did not feel like doing so? Have you declared anything at all? How about writing down your own declaration? Good areas to think of is your business, your marriage and your family. People spend a lot of time writing down their wedding vows, but what about the rest of your life? What about signing your wedding vows and keeping a framed copy in the house. That way when discord does happen, you can be reminded of what you promised. How about a declaration of health on the bathroom mirror. Even a declaration to become the best version of yourself. All of these, written out and signed, will hold you accountable. Even if you never show them to another soul, seeing your words and your signature should be enough to motivate you to keep your word to yourself.
As the country celebrates this document, thinking of declaring your independence from mediocrity. Declare what kind of person you are going to be in every area of your life! Feel free to share them with others, or just place them where you can see your words and your signature. Do not write a declaration flippantly. Do so with meaning, dedication and purpose.
The other night I attended a talk on the brewing history in my city. Indirectly, it was supposed to be focused on the history of one company in particular – Schlitz Brewing Company. Why? The reason is they are going out of business after more than 150 years. In reality, they first went out of business in 1982, a little more about that later. What this talk, among others, taught me is that there is a lot to be learned from our history. It also taught me a few other lessons that I wanted to share with you today.
Schlitz was a brewery founded in 1849 in Milwaukee. I am not going to spend too much time on the history of this company as this is a self-improvement site and not a beer site. It is an interesting story if you want to research it. Through the years the company survived many challenges. This included prohibition where they were forced to develop and sell other products. As late as 1957, they were the largest brewer in the world. What happened? That is where the lessons begin. We will talk about the brewery, but I am sure you will be able to make the connections to how we can apply this to our lives fairly quickly.
In the 1970’s a man who was an accountant, not a brewer, was given major power at the brewery. Lesson one might be to stick to what you know. He somewhat did this as he was a number guy. He decided that instead of battling other brewers to sell the most beer, he would find ways in which they could increase their profit margins. This included swapping out cheaper ingredients and rushing how long it took to prepare the beer. Before we get to what happened at this brewery, let us look at one other company the company had purchased and tried this same experience with before. Primo beer in Hawaii. When they bought the company it had roughly 70% of the Hawaiian beer market. After cheapening the brewing process, in only a few years their market share was down to 20%. They dismissed it as a regional issue. Not learning from your mistakes, or at least pondering what could have caused them would be lesson two.
Meanwhile, on the mainland things were looking great. Profits were up. Beer was being produced quicker and cheaper. Shareholders seemed to be happy. Corporate executives were happy with their bonuses and raises. Only one problem remained. The beer tasted terrible. People noticed. What happens when you start producing an inferior product, even if it is faster and cheaper? People stop buying it. That is exactly what happened in this case. After several years of denial and falling profits (remember they were not good at learning from their mistakes) they went back to the original recipe. It was too little, too late. They first closed their doors in 1982 and sold to a different brewer. Side note, because of the debt this company inherited with the purchase, it also went out of business.
The final lesson, and perhaps the most important one, is the one we can gain by looking at what brought down the company. Sacrificing quality to cut corners. You may be thinking this does not apply to you if you are not a beer producer, or at least a business owner of some kind. Not true. It applies to us all. When we begin to cut corners in any area of our life. It can be performance in our job. It can be cutting corners when it comes to our health. We can cut corners in our relationship. All of these will come back to haunt us in the long run. We may try to go back to being a good employee and showing up to work on time and working hard while we are there. By then, our boss may have made up their mind to move on. We may want to start working out and eating healthy, but the damage to our body may be beyond our ability to repair. In our relationships, hurt may be forgiven, but seldom is it forgotten. As these continue to mount, it can be impossible to overcome, even if we become the most dedicated and loving partner.
The lesson should be abundantly clear. Never sacrifice quality. That is certainly true if you are a business owner. Even more so about ourselves. By delivering the highest quality product, which is the best version of ourselves, we keep the customers happy. This is our boss by being the best employee we can be. It is our own body, and mental health, by taking care of it. It is also our relationships. This is with our family, friends and romantic partner. If we do not take care of our relationships and bring the best version of ourselves, our life will be tough to make it through. Always work to bring the best quality product to market by working to be the best version of you that you can be. Keep all of the customers in your life happy. Your boss, your doctor and your friends, family and spouse.
The ‘secret of success’. It is something that billions are spent on every year to discover. The amusing part of this is that it can be found in this quote by Aristotle. You need to have successful habits. Ones that continually push you to be a better version of yourself. If you make exercise and learning a habit, there is no limit to where this world may take you. When we are stressed, we do not rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our habits. That is why it is paramount that we begin to work on them as soon as we can. Habits take time to develop. They are also easier to develop when we are not in a stressed state.
A few years back, I appeared on the television show Positively Milwaukee. One of the strategies for success that I advocated that day was that we should learn to swim while we are on the shore and not when the ship is sinking. Meaning, that learning and perfecting skills should be done before we need them. When will we need them? We never know. That is why it is so important to get into the habits that will be profitable to our lives now. Profitable does not only refer to financial concerns. A habit that increases, or profits, our health is a vital one to have. Self-care is a great habit to develop for mental health purposes. When will we need a hand with a mental health? That can be right around the corner!
Another important aspect to consider about success is that it cannot be compartmentalized. We have seen this is CEOs, celebrities and others. If your success in one area of your life comes at the sacrifice of others, you are not a success. If you are wealthy, but you family is not happy or your friendships are suffering, are you truly successful? We need to develop excellence habits and apply them to every area of our life. What healthy habits for excellence do you have? Which ones do you think would be healthy to develop?
Let me ask you a question you may have never been asked, or even thought to ask. What stress are you grateful for? You read that right. Most of our lives, and a good many posts on this site, has been focused on reducing or eliminating stress. Wouldn’t a life with no stress be a great thing? You might think so, but stress does us a lot of good if managed properly. I recall listening to a talk by Norman Vincent Peale where he described a place where not a single person had a problem. Everyone there was completely problem free. A friend of his asked him to take him there. His response? “It is Woodlawn cemetery.”
That is very true. Stress is a sign of life. Many of us spend our lives trying to get rid of our stress. Our time would be best served if we found a way in which we could put stress to work for us. Changing our approach and interaction with stress can do this. A change in mindset can transform how we see stress. It will not change the stress. It will change us. The world will give us stress no matter who we are or what level we reach. Having a healthy approach to stress will allow us to succeed at every level. What is this switch in mindset? Let us take a look at it below.
I always reference working out. Lifting weights is a stress. It stresses the muscle. In response the muscle grows stronger. Without that, the muscle would remain weak. The same is true for our mental, emotional and spiritual muscles. Increasing our resilience, patience and compassion happens when we face opposition. It can be hard to be grateful for them in the moment, but they are indeed making us stronger, if we decide to let them. It may be a slightly tired cliche, but an airplane rises flying into the wind. How do you manage stress? How do you use it for motivation and getting stronger? Share your ideas with the rest of us in the comments below.
The above photo is one that Margie drew on the window on our front porch. She really is a talented lady. What does this have to do with you and living an amazing life? Plenty. Stick with me and we will uncover this secret together. In the title of this post we mentioned what you should express more often to have an amazing life. The answer is as simple as it is profound. What are you looking to have more of in your life? Health? Love? Money? The key is expressing that as often as you can. Even if you do not currently have as much of it as you desire. When it comes to love, can you really have too much?
This may sound like an odd version of the law of attraction. In some ways it is. When you surround yourself with what you wish to have more of, it is a constant reminder to focus on the that. Take the picture above. Every time that Margie and I sit on the porch, which we enjoy doing with a good cup of coffee, we will be reminded that we are two love birds. We have pictures of moments that we enjoyed together throughout our house and loving reminders of each other. Whenever we glance at one of those items, it gives us a gentle reminder of our love. If you are constantly reminded of how special something is, you are far less likely to take it for granted.
It can be easy to see how this works in love, but how about when you are looking for financial abundance and you are so poor you set off bank alarms simply by walking by? By focusing on what little you do have, even if it is far less than you wish. It can also be taking little mental vacations to where you wish to be. These can be facilitated by having those reminders placed around. It is more than just your decor. It is how you speak, what you think and most important, how you feel about a certain subject. If your bank account is as barren as a desert, it can be hard to feel abundant. That is when you must do your best to do so. You see, if you are constantly reminding yourself about how little you have you end up in a defeated mindset and may miss opportunities that could help that. It is not to say that you should act fiscally irresponsible, but foster a gratitude for what you do have.
Having these reminders work great to increase what you want to have in your life, but they work just as good for helping you to get back on track when things start to slip. Should you and your spouse find yourself in a moment of discord, seeing loving pictures or symbols of the two of you can help remind you that this is a moment in time. Yes, you may not like your partner very much at the moment, but you will be reminded how much you have loved them, and deep down still do. This can help keep the negative in perspective.
The secret to having an amazing life is to express all that you are grateful for and wish for. It is to limit discussing and thinking about all that you want less of. Think about your own life. Do you spend time thinking and getting excited for all that you have and all that you want? Do you find yourself worrying and complaining about all that is wrong in your life? It is important to be present and be aware of your thoughts. Yes, we all have challenges and bad days. Nobody’s life is all sunshine and rainbows, but the goal is to have more sunny days than cloudy. You can set yourself up for success in this by catering your surroundings and expression. How can you improve your own life in this way? I am always looking for suggestions. I would love to hear your story.
Self-improvement, personal-development or whatever term you choose to use can be a complicated affair. It need not be. Searching in your local library or bookstore the ‘self-help’ section can seem overwhelming. Where do you start? I wrote 3 books on the matter myself. They are filled with great tools and strategies that will improve the life you are now living. If you are interested, feel free to search ‘Neil Panosian’ and pick one up. That being said, there is a simple way to begin to live a more enjoyable and fulfilling life starting right now. You need not purchase a book, seminar or anything else. All it takes is a change in mindset.
As you can see in the photo above, it is more accurately a change of focus. As humans we are programed to focus on what is wrong with our life. That can be helpful. It can also be extremely detrimental. When our focus is exclusively, or even primarily on what is wrong, we can be left feeling heavy and defeated. Life can feel like something we have to ‘make it through’. This is a terrible way to go through life. A simple shift can lighten that load and make our life more enjoyable.
Many people call this change in focus “Looking at the world through rose-colored glasses”. That is but one way to look at it. Changing our primary focus on what continues to go right in our life is not denying that there are things that need work. What it does acknowledge is that in any life, there is still plenty of things to be grateful for. Will this help you fix and improve your life? The answer is a surprising ‘Yes’. Will being grateful that you only have a flat tire and not a more expensive repair fix the tire? No it will not. What it will do, however, is keep you in a better frame of mind. It will make the effort to change the tire, or the time waiting for someone to come and do it that much more enjoyable. To that end, you will treat those who help you with more gratitude and appreciation.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 