We touched on this a little earlier in the week. You really do have control of your mind. It doesn’t come easy. That is especially true if you have be letting it run the show up until now. Things like declaring your intention to have a good day no matter what the world throws at you in the mirror first thing in the mirror, go a long way to taking back that control. How else can we regain control of our minds? One word that always comes to the forefront is gratitude. Taking a few minutes each day to focus on all we have grateful for is a method to start to take back that control. If you do this at the end of each day, say by writing a few things in a gratitude journal, your mind will subconsciously be looking them throughout the day without you even having to tell it to.
Another method we discussed a while ago is the method of accomplishing goals. That is writing your goal on a top of a paper and taking an hour a day, five days a week, to come up with as many ideas on how to reach that goal as possible. Not only will you be focused on your goal in that hour, your brain will begin to bring to light ideas in the oddest hours. Meaning that in the background, our minds continue to work on that goal as we go about our day. This ‘goal’ could mean many things. How to improve our health, our relationship, our career, or even our sense of inner peace.
Make your mind work for you. It is up to you to take back control of your mind. Once you do, it can help you accomplish things beyond your wildest imagination!
Here we are at Monday again! Seems like there is 52 of them a year. So many of us dread Monday. It can be understandable. Back to work, away from the family. You can’t sleep in and spend the day drinking coffee and relaxing with those you love. Unless, of course that is your job. In which case, please let me know where they are hiring. On Monday we have obligations to meet. This time of year we might have some weather to contend with. There are far more challenges than on the weekend.
This quote from the Dalai Lama reminds us that despite our challenges, or often including them, the gift is to be alive. We need to change a little mindset on a Monday. Instead of asking ourselves how we can make it through, I feel we should ask ourselves how we can make sure not to waste it. If we adopt the saying from the Dalai Lama above, we will begin each day with both gratitude for the gift of being alive and an intention to make something out of that gift of life we have been given. This may not always lead to a successful day full of joy and dancing unicorns and rainbows, but the chances sure will improve with intent.
This may seem a bit over-the-top for some of you. It really shouldn’t be. Our lives can be one phone call, one diagnosis away from being flipped upside down. I do not think any of us could argue that. There are people in the hospital wishing and praying for the life we know have. There are people who would have gave anything to make it as long as we have. Their life may have been tragically cut short. Yes, we all have challenges and things we need to overcome. That is part of life and what helps us grow and discover new and wonderful things about ourselves and the world around us.
As for the intent portion of the equation, how much better would our day go if we looked in the mirror and declared that we were going to have a wonderful day no matter what the world threw at us? It is admitting that things may not go according to plan, but we still can maintain control over our emotions. I recall reading Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. In that book he describes his experiences at a Nazi concentration camp and how he managed to maintain control over his emotions. Dare I say, we will not face something so grave, but we will still face our share of challenges. It may seem like wearing rose colored glasses when we claim we can maintain our inner peace and joy despite outside circumstances, but that is not so. We can still admit we would desire things were different than they were, but that there are still many reasons to be grateful the way things are. Even if, as the quote above says, it is the gift of being alive.
I had the great pleasure of going to the “Best of Milwaukee” party as my lovely lady’s bakery was nominated for 3 different awards. While there I met a new friend who was also an entrepreneur. As we talked, some familiar topics began to creep up. As a business owner she struggled with work life balance. Wondering what was the key to keeping her family healthy and happy as well as keeping her business thriving. She was just wondering how to get to that happy place where both had her best and were doing equally as well.
You do not have to be a business owner, or a mother to find yourself in this position. Although, I believe that emotionally that may be one of the toughest combinations. Many people try their best to balance work and life. Does it not seem that just when you are getting your career on track, your family feels deserted? When you work to increase the love and connection with those you love, you find your bank account is near empty and your career or business is suffering. That is because we have been lied to. We have accepted a truth that does not exist. That false truth is work/life balance.
In order for us to feel satisfied that we have done our best in any area of our life, we must feel we have given 100% of ourselves to it. If you give 100% of yourself to something, how much does that leave left over for any other area of your life? That would be zero. Although that truth does not sound as satisfying as achieving some sort of nirvana work/life balance, it is how the human mind and heart operate. Our joy at our success in the area of achievement will be tempered by a feeling of guilt to those areas we have neglected. This is especially true of high achievers who wish to be their best at everything. Best parent, best business owner, best parent, best spouse or best friend. As the picture above alludes to, you cannot chase two rabbits and catch both of them.
As dismal as this may sound, it is also very liberating. Knowing that it is impossible to be amazing at everything all at once eliminates the pressure of having to be. We should still have the desire to be the best version of ourselves that we can be, and it all the facets that we can be. How do we manage that? One way to do this is set times for each area of your life. Give 100% of yourself to that area in the designated time. Then when the time comes to move to another area, give 100% to that area. You will be giving 100% of yourself, but still setting limits as to not burn yourself out. Also, especially if you are a high-achiever, set a designated time to give 100% to active self-care. If you do not take care of yourself, you will not be able to give to your family, business, job or spouse. The better shape you are in, the better you can give.
Another thing to consider is that each area of your life will experience peaks and valleys. It is not a reflection of a failure on your part. It is the natural way of things. Sometimes your business will be suffering and need a little more of your time. Take note that I said ‘more of your time’ and not ‘all of your time’. If you neglect one area for another, you may find yourself running from fire to fire in your life always feeling like you are failing. It may be hard to take a step back from an area that is not at the level you are striving to get it, but it is essential for creating that balance. The most difficult area to do this is self-care. When your business and family need some attention, you can feel guilty taking time for yourself. It is so important to remember that even a little time giving 100% to self-care can allow you to come back with a better ability to serve the area of your life that needs it.
That is not to say any of this is easy. There will still be days you may feel like a failure in some area of your life. It is merely a sign you care. Now that the more you set defined boundaries and take care of yourself, the better your life will be. The balance is in not trying to do it all at once. Keep in mind there will be peaks and valleys and play the long game. You got this!
I seldom share data like this, but here are the stats for this website for the year. As you can see over 24,000 of you have viewed this site over 30,000 times as of the writing of this post. That is the second most views and the most people since inception. If you would have told me a mere moth ago that we would have reached this many people, I would have had a hard time believing you. It is my sincerest hope that we will continue to reach, inspire, motivate and encourage people from every corner of the globe, which brings us to our next data point.
It may be a little hard to decipher the colors on this map, but everything in shades of green is where are site has been viewed this year. As you can see with the exception of Greenland and a few countries in Africa, we have been viewed pretty much everywhere. Not only does this make me proud, but it highlights a very important point for all of us. That is that self-improvement is universal. I have had the pleasure of chatting with people all around the globe and am constantly reminded that although we are separated by borders, culture and politics, our basic human needs and desire to be better versions of ourselves can be found no matter where you call home.
I mention that point because we all deserve to encourage and help each other on the journey. It also gives me great pleasure to hear from those of you who read this blog, so always feel free to comment or message us your thoughts and ideas. We at Secret2anamazinglife.com want to serve our global community and leave this world a better place than we found it. Thank you all for support and I look forward to having the honor of sharing everything I learn with you.
We work so hard on our goals. We work hard on our health. If we are smart, we work very hard on our relationships. Still, there is one thing that we often skip working on. The irony is that by working on improving this one thing, we will improve on everything else in our life.
That one thing is ourselves! When was the last time you sat down and thought of ways you could improve? Better yet, when was the last time you came up with a concrete plan to do so? With New Years right around the corner, let’s do more than come up with random wishes to improve our life. Let us come up with a measurable plan to do so. It will not only improve ourselves, it will improve our life!
New month, better attitude! So many people underestimate the power they hold in their own lives. This picture above gives us three powerful things to think about. Let us take them one at a time. By the time we are done exploring and examining it, we will have some new tools, strategies and powers we can use to positively impact our lives. Sound good? Let us get to it!
The first one is one of my favorites! The power of our words. This is one area that people overlook or do not think is as powerful as it is. Do not take my word for it. This is backed by science. Dr. Masaru Emoto did some amazing experiments using the effects of words on water. He showed that when water was exposed to words such as hate, anger and the emotions behind it, the molecules became fractured and deformed. However, when exposed to words like love, peace and the emotions behind it, they formed perfect molecules. You may think, “So a guy yelling at water made it deformed. What does that have to do with me?” Your body is roughly 50 to 60% water! If you change the molecules in 60% of your body, how will could that not affect you? This can be a negative cliche’ you recite by force of habit. It can be overreacting when you are ill. Many of us focus on what is wrong and what we lack in our life. You can see, from a scientific standpoint, how this can affect our physical well-being.
Next is the power of our thoughts. According to research, the average individual thinks over 60,000 thoughts a day. Driving in the recent snow storm, it appears I live in a city with many below average people, but I digress. Further research states that over 80% of what we think on a daily basis is negative and 95% of it is repeat thoughts from the day before. Can you imagine hanging around with someone who talks negative 80% of the time? What if that same person says tells you 95% of that same stuff everyday? How long do you think you would hang out with them? Ironically, that is what is occurring in our own heads! Most of this occurs without us paying much attention. What we think will have a great impact on what do and are willing to try. That has a great impact on our life!
Lastly, is the power of our presence. How many of us tolerate being places we are not tolerated or at the very least, not appreciated? This is one I have to remind myself of often. There is something to be said for making compromise for the ones we love, but it should not come at the cost of our own peace.
For this last month of the year, take control of your words, your thoughts and your presence. See what a difference it will make in your own life. See how much power you hold to positively impact your life.
We will get to why this question is indeed one of the most important questions in just a minute. First, I would like to share with you an event that got me thinking about this. A gentleman I see occasionally at my day job paid me one of the most unique, but meaningful compliments. He told me what he most admired about me was my consistency of character. How despite outside circumstances, I remain upbeat and treat everyone I meet with kindness and compassion. I would love to tell you this is true all of the time, but it is not. It is true enough that a gent would notice and compliment me on it. So what is my secret? How do I remain upbeat and always treat others kindly? How can I do this despite what my outside circumstances are? More importantly, how can you manage to do this as well?
The first step is to answer what good old Albert said was the most important question. Is the universe a friendly place? Here is the tricky answer. Whatever we decide the answer is, we can find corresponding evidence for it. If we look for examples that the universe is a terrible place with people only out for themselves, there is no shortage of that. If, however, we are brave enough to believe the universe is a wonderful place with people showing kindness and compassion towards others, we will find that too. We may have to look a little harder as that kind of news does not sell as well. They are both there. I am here to tell you life will be much more rewarding and joyous if you decide the universe is a wonderful place to be.
One good way to do this is to find a guiding quote that speaks to you in that regard. Although not an overly religious person, that quote from the bible is one of my favorites. Whether you are religious, spiritual or not, find one that speaks to you. If you decide that the universe is is a friendly place, than even when things seem to be going sideways, you will understand that it is ultimately for a good purpose. This may sound like a bunch of B.S., and it is. Belief system that is. If your belief system is that the world is generally a good place, you will understand if the dark and the challenges bring their own blessings.
Does that mean your life will suddenly be rainbows and unicorns? Of course not. You will, however, begin to see the gifts that challenges bring. You will find yourself saying things like, “Boy this person is testing my patience. By testing my patience, it will help me strengthen it.” This could be to yourself or out loud. By developing this mindset you will be able to be more consistent in how you are living your life. This not only can apply to the overall purpose of your life, but to specific areas as well.
Recently, a friend mentioned how they struggled to keep a positive attitude about the business they started. When you are excited about your business and nobody seems to come through the door, how do you stay excited? That is a challenge. If you have a firm belief in what you do and why you are doing it, view those ‘down’ times as a test of your dedication to your business and an opportunity to learn different ways to attract customers and improve on that which you are now doing. My third book did not go over nearly as well as I had hoped. Instead of viewing myself as a failed author, I took that opportunity to examine how I bring my message to people, how I promote my books and what I could do better with my upcoming fourth book.
The secret to a consistently amazing life is to decide that your universe is a friendly place, or whatever goal you are pursuing is worthwhile. If that is the case, then how could anything not be working towards your greater good? Put both the victories as well as the challenges to work for you. The more you do this, the more life will be amazing and the easier it will be to be consistent in all you do and who you are.
Never in my wildest dreams would I ever imagine that I would be writing a daily inspirational blog for over 13 years! What makes my heart so full of gratitude is that we seem to be growing our community and reaching more souls in more places. Still no Greenland, but we will get there. We are in over 200 countries and this year, as of this writing we have had over 28,000 views. That is the second most in 13 years! Even better is we have reached over 22,000 people. That is the most in 13 years.
My life’s mission is to leave the world a little better than I found it. Through sharing the tools and strategies I continue to learn, I believe I am doing just that. With all of your help, and lately with a lot of our friends in China, we will continue to grow and positively impact the lives of all of those we care about.
This blog was started on Thanksgiving in 2012. Gratitude is the one thing that will change not only our lives, but the world at large, quicker than anything else I know. Tomorrow we celebrate Thanksgiving here in the United States. While there are lots of things we need to improve, there are still a lot we have to be grateful for. I look forward to continuing to serve you and to increase engagement as we look forward to the coming year. With your help, 2026 can be our biggest and most impactful year yet!
The title of this sounds a bit too grand to be true. I thought so at first as well. The plan to achieve anything you want was brought to us courtesy of Earl Nightingale. One of my favorite authors and speakers. Earl was actually a lot more than that and I encourage you to explore his many works. He developed a plan that required no more than 5 hours a week, none on weekends, and can give us anything we want in a surprisingly short amount of time.
Here is the method, short and sweet. Wake up one hour earlier every morning. Yes, I know this sounds difficult. I wake up everyday at 4am, so I can understand. When I tell you what you can accomplish with this idea, you will soon see it is worth it. Make yourself a nice cup of coffee or tea. Whatever you prefer. Sit down with a pad of paper and a pen. Yes, we are going old-fashioned here. There is a reason that makes it more powerful. Write your single goal on the top of the piece of paper. Now, begin to list as many ideas as you can for reaching that goal as your sip your brew. Do not judge them and understand most of your ideas will not be very good. Write them down anyway. All you need is one good idea to succeed. Shoot for 20 ideas a day. Working 5 days a week, this will give you 100 ideas a week. Can you see how the law of averages is with you?
Another benefit of doing this is the fact that it imbeds your goal into your mind, but conscious and subconscious mind. Your mind will be working on it as you go throughout your day. The wonderful idea you are looking for may not come to you in that hour you are working, but may pop into your head on the drive to work, or while waiting in line at the grocery store. By writing with pen on paper, we create a greater mind/body connection. This will help drive our goal into our mind even more.
Bonus idea!!!! While doing this to accomplish goals certainly makes sense, there are other applications that will transform your life just as powerfully. Can you imagine waking up and trying to come up with 20 ways to add love and connection to your relationship? How about ways to show yourself some self-care and inner peace? How about leave a great legacy for those behind you? Imagine trying to come up with 100 ideas a week on any of these subjects? How would that change your life?
I love this quote from Saint Francis. It reminds us that actions speak louder than words. How about you? Do you show consistent character? Do you treat everyone kindly and did not let outside circumstances determine the way you interact with others? I would love to tell you that this is true with me all of the time, but it is not. It must, however, be true often enough for some folks to notice and compliment me on it.
How many of you have children out there? If not children, how many are parents to one of our four-legged friends? Do they always listen when you tell them something? Children go to bed as soon as you utter the words. The dog sitting nicely whenever you tell him to do something? We all know that this is not how the world works. Do they follow you around and mimic your actions? Do they repeat things you say? (the children, not the dog) Even the things that you do not mean to say around them? It is not just children and animals that are this way. When our words do not match our actions we can be thought hypocritical or even worse.
Whatever the ‘gospel’ of your life is, do your best to preach it at all times. Use your words when absolutely necessary.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 