This is a picture I took at the Wisconsin State Fair. As you can see, there are lots of people gathered together in the name of fun. It would make sense that statistically they would differ in race, politics and religion. Probably in a host of other categories as well.
Later in the night, Margie and I hosted our weekly DJ show as well. Same story, only on a slightly smaller scale. Many different people there, but all gathered to have fun.
My question is this – If it works for a DJ show and for the great Wisconsin State Fair, why can’t it work for life in general? Can you imagine if we all were focused on how to gather and have as much fun in life as we could? People sharing their secrets for having fun on the morning commute or going to the dentist? Life would be amazing. Just a thought of what is possible.
This is a rather simple phrase from one of the smarter, more accomplished men of our day. Leo did a lot in his day. Inventions, painting, and some science. He had a well-spent life. This seems like one of those phrases that are a little too big for most of us to figure out. How does one lead a well- spent life?
As usual, we make it a little more complicated than need be. What kind of life we are living is not something we stop and contemplate on a daily basis. What we can do is ask ourselves, at the end of each day,“Did I spend this day well?” Were we productive? Did we take actions towards our goals?
A well-spent day is about far more than productivity. We should ask ourselves, “Did I inspire and encourage anyone today?” How did we treat the people we came in contact with? Did we practice self-care? A productive day can look different to everyone.
If we put enough of these days together, it will have us feeling peaceful when the end of our life is drawing near. Ask yourself, did you spend your day well today?
Have you ever thought about what stands between you and your goals? When I ask people this question at seminars, a lot of different answers come up. Money, time, network are just a few. What many people either fail to realize, or fail to admit, is that it is not lack of resources that is stopping them. It is lack of resourcefulness.
If we were to look back at the evolution of even the largest companies, we would no doubt see humble beginnings. They worked with what they had until they learned our acquired more. My own success has mirrored this path. Starting this blog came with a great deal of ignorance to begin with. I knew nothing of how the blog world worked. Today we have been viewed in over 200 countries. Writing my first book? Same story. It seems with every book I publish, I learn something new.
How about you? Are your excuses standing between you and your goals? With a little more effort, could you overcome a seeming lack of resources? Denying this is only serving to hold you back.
Falling in love with life will be the theme of my upcoming fourth book. Do you remember how it feels when you first fall in love with a person? You feel like you are floating on a cloud. Nothing can bother you. Imagine feeling the same way about life!
There are secrets to get this feeling back. It is much like love in a relationship. After a while, we begin to take things for granted. We begin to see the cracks and faults. Sometimes to the detriment of all the good and the magic. That is why children have a much more magical view of life than adults. Life is new. Everything is a miracle. My next book will help you capture that again as an adult.
In the meantime, I would love to hear things and situations that help you fall in love with life. Even if just for a moment.
This is more than some feel good quote. Epictetus, who went from being born into slavery to teacher of philosophy, knew a thing or two about not having a lot. What allowed him to transform his life, and the lives of countless others, was his mindset! We have discussed at length the subject of gratitude on this site. We have done so because it is one of the most powerful tools we can use to transform our life in the quickest period of time. Want to suddenly have a more fulfilling and happy life? Your best bet would be to find as many ways to incorporate gratitude as you can.
Getting back to the quote at hand, what can it tell us about our own life? A good deal. We may not have been born into slavery, but all of us have had our share of hard times. Maybe a job loss or unexpected bill that has set us back. We all have. What makes focusing on what we have verses what we lack so wise? Let us take a look at that. It will help us see that life is really an inner game. What do I mean by this? Let us look at both sides of this quote.
When we focus on lack, life will never feel fulfilling. If we are a person filled with anger and rage and we suddenly win the lottery, have a great spouse and loving kids, what will our life be? It will be one of anger and rage. We spend so much time trying to achieve outer success before focusing on inner thoughts. That is why we see rock stars, movie stars and celebrities who seem to have it all take their own lives and become addicts. They mastered the outer game, but failed at the inner game. If you become rich and successful, but your are unhappy and ungrateful your life will feel like a failure. In reality, it will be.
Conversely, when we focus on what we have we feel fulfilled. This does not mean we will not seek something better. It simply means as we do that we will acknowledge the fact that we have a lot to be grateful while we are pursuing it. When we do receive more, it will feel even more wonderful because we are already living with an attitude of gratitude. It will just give us more to celebrate and feel grateful for. Those focused on lack will never have enough, no matter how much they have. Those who are focused at feeling grateful for what they have will always feel good no matter how little they have.
Can you see the wisdom in this mindset? One feels terrible no matter how good circumstances are. One feels great no matter how terrible circumstances are. Life, at its core, is our emotional state. If we can find a way to be happy regardless of outside circumstances, than our life will be one of joy. That way is through gratitude. After all focusing on what we lack has turned celebrities into addicts. Focusing on what we have has turned a slave into a philosophy teacher. You owe it to yourself, and those around you, to fill your heart with gratitude. It will make you less stressed, happier and more enjoyable to be around. That is a secret to an amazing life!
Here is another post about freedom. It is the freedom that is controlled by the power of our thoughts. Listening to some motivational content the other morning, I heard a good description of this freedom. The gym is a place a lot of people dread going or find like their are ‘forcing themselves’ to go to. The ironic aspect is that most of the people who feel this way are the people who are reasonably healthy and working to get better. If you find someone who has experienced a major health challenge such as a heart attack or a form of cancer and they realize that the gym offers them the freedom of a healthier lifestyle. It not only allows them the freedom of better mobility and energy, but quite often the freedom of being alive.
On the opposite end of the spectrum are people for which it is too late to attend the gym. Maybe they let their health slide to a point they are no longer able to be mobile, or even worse. If you would give them a chance to go back in time to go to the gym and reclaim their life, they would jump at the chance to do so. If you are constantly chasing pleasure, you have become its slave.
Quite often, the difference between prison and opportunity exists in our minds. Take your job, for example. Many people feel as if they are in prison when they are at work. Studies show that 87% of people dislike their jobs. A simple shift in mindset could great assist us in this matter. If we realize what our jobs afford us to do. With them we can pay our bills to have a roof over our heads, the lights on and food on the table. Another great way to turn our prison into opportunity is to attach a bigger meaning than a simple paycheck to what we do. When I worked more directly with the public at my day job, I focused on bringing as much joy and encouragement to everyone I came in contact with. Knowing I was doing more than earning a paycheck, I was blessing lives, made going to work a lot more enjoyable. This mentality is one that everyone who works with the public should adopt. Judging by some of the service I have received lately, it is one many choose not to. Viewed simply, you have to be there because you are getting paid. The customer has to be there because they need your good or service. Why not make it the most fun the interaction can be? It will be far more enjoyable for both of you.
Whether it is working out, or working, your mentality has a lot more to do with your situation than even the facts do. Look for the opportunity in every situation and your life will never be the same.
This simple mindset shift transforms life. One feels good. One does not. One makes your life feel good. One does not not. Neither changes events, yet both change your reality. How can reality change if facts do not?
The reality we feel is seldom reality in actuality. Instead, it is a reality as viewed through the lens of our past experiences and our focus. The first we have little control over. The second we have absolute control over. In fact, the only way we can effectively change the past, is by changing the way we view it.
How we do this is simple. Have you had a tragic event in your life? You can view it as the trauma that prevents you from moving forward. Then again, you can view as the reason you developed such resilience. The facts didn’t change, just your response to them and the meaning you assigned them.
In a broader sense, the same applies to life. There are things that appear negative to us. We can choose to view them as so, or we can ask ourselves how we can use them. Can they teach us something? Can they remind us to be grateful for something else? Perhaps, like we mentioned earlier, they can help us be more resilient? The choice is ours. We cannot often change events, but we can change what we decide they mean to us and our reaction to them. More on this next post.
Today is Monday. Many people strongly dislike Mondays. It is the start of the work week and the end of relaxing. For me personally, I DJ Sunday and go to bed about 2am. My alarm goes off for work at 4am. If you are keeping score at home, that leaves 2 hours for sleep.
Here is the interesting thing – there is beauty in a Monday. It is the start of a week of challenges that can leave you a stronger person by weeks end. It is the beginning of a week of opportunity to save towards your retirement. How about developing character by showing up on time and working hard?
It is not only Mondays, but every aspect of life that has beauty. Yes, even the ones we consider negative. I have found beauty in a dental visit. I have found beauty cleaning up a river. There is even beauty to be found at a funeral.
What is the big deal about finding beauty in life? The more beauty you can find around you, the more beautiful life becomes. How about you? Have there been situations where you have been able to find beauty when others could not?
This is a good thought. Every situation does not always serve us in the same way. For example, at my day job I have been working 55 hours a week for the last year. Certainly nice money, but had me burnt out. Now, they hired a coworker for me. It will be a lot less money, but I will be able to focus more on my writing and fitness more.
I could have cursed the fact for the last year I have not been able to spend as much time with Margie as I wanted, or I could have used the extra money to save for our wedding and pay off my car. Conversely, I could lament the fact that I will be earning a lot less or celebrate all the extra time I will be afforded.
Keep this thought in your head. “What is wrong is always available. But so it’s what’s right. ” There is always a sunny side of the street. You can find it when you practice an attitude of gratitude. I always tell people, “If you can’t find something to be grateful for, you aren’t trying very hard. ” Even being able to read these words means you have the gift of vision, access to the internet, and the freedom to view what interests you. We are followed in over 200 countries, but if you live in North Korea, you would not be able to view us.
The above example listed 3 or 4 things you could be grateful for. In any situation there is always something to be grateful for. Sometimes you have to search hard. Most times you do not. So don’t curse the seasons or your situation. Instead, plant and act accordingly. Remember, what is wrong is always available, but so is what’s right.
I wrote extensively about what I referred to as “sunshine-challed” people and their negative effect on your life in my first 2 books. There were also tips on how to avoid, or at the very least limit your exposure to these people. As the world gets even busier, our energy is more important than ever.
Why is energy so important? Without enough energy we certainly cannot get all of the things we wanted to get to in life completed. It gets worse than that. Low energy long enough changes our mentality from one of thriving, to one of survival. The reason this is a big deal is that eliminates our zest for living. Who wants to go through life feeling like it is a job? Not me I say!
The solution is to surround yourself with people who feel like a miracle. Ones who fill your soul with not only energy, but hope and passion. You can never have too many of these people in your life. When you find one, make sure to hang on to them!
How do we make sure that we hang onto people who are Miracles in our life? The answer is simple – look to become a miracle in the lives of others. It really is not as difficult as it sounds. In a world that throws a lot of negativity at us, try being a light. Reminding those we care about why they are amazing and what they have to be grateful for is a miracle in itself. If you do this often, people will start showing up for you in much the same manner!
Do you want to surround yourself with what Bob Marley called ’emotional vampires’ or people who are living miracles? Which one are you going to be?
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 