Tag: mindset

BEWARE OF THIS ADDICTION

Wow! This is a good one. How many of us fall into this trap? At one time or another, probably every single one of us. It gives birth to all sorts of cliches such as ” The grass is always greener on the other side.” We continually postpone our happiness. Thinking it will find us over the next horizon. The hard truth is quite the opposite. The grass is really greener where you water it. The next horizon may contain new joys, but it will also contain new challenges. That is why ‘Destination Addiction’ is so dangerous. It can be facilitated by advertising convincing us that we need the next great thing. Social Media, where we compare our challenges to other’s highlights further pushes us in the wrong direction. Thinking our life does not compare to the life of those around us.

How do we overcome Destination Addiction? By changing the question we ask ourselves daily. We spend as much as 90% of our time on the journey and only 10% at the destination. If you had the choice, which would you rather work on making happier? What is the question we should be asking ourselves to make this switch? “What can I do to find, or create happiness right now?” In every situation there is the possibility to find some sort of happiness or the opportunity to create happiness. While it is true that certain circumstances are far easier to do this in, the truth is that our intention and mindset can make every situation a possibility for joy. Even if it may be difficult to find joy for ourselves, we can have the opportunity to create for others. Guess what that would do? Seeing that you have brought joy to another makes you feel….happy! Therefore, even in the struggle, even in the challenge, there exists the possibility of joy.

Have you ever thought of life in this way? Have you ever asked yourself the question we stated above, “What can I do to find, or create happiness right now?” Personally, I can confess that I have not done it enough. That should make us happy. It means we are leaving a lot of happiness unexperienced! There is so much more joy we could discover, and more important, experience, in our life! How exciting is that thought. Try asking yourself this question at least once a day. Whether you do it when things are going well, or if you try it when things are a little tough, you will add more joy to your life. That should be reason enough to do it!

A WORLD OF POSSIBILITIES

Last post we spoke about how a simple change of mind can radically transform your life. Todays, post is an example of that. Here is a thought that sheds a new light in a way to look at an old idea. Friendship. We can look at friendship as the blessing it is. We can look at our friends and family as a sort of network, and that is true. Have you ever considered that people in your life are a connection to an entire different world? It is true! Let us shift this and think of ourselves for a second. Think of an average day in your life. What time you wake up. Where do you wake up? Who, if anyone, do you wake up with? Do you go to a job or take care of a household? Do you travel or work from home? Then there are all of the personal questions. Do you start your day with water, coffee or tea? What are your morning rituals? Do you even have any? Who are the people you deal with every morning?

Think of your closest friends. Their day no doubt, starts different from yours. Chances are they do not live in the same house as you. They might not even work at the same job. How about someone in a different area of the country? They might wake up to different weather or at a different time. Now if we expand that out to a different country, what is life like for that person? They, more than likely, eat a different breakfast. Their commute looks different. Customs and routines are different. It is like an entirely different world. This brings with it several good points to consider.

Everyone we come in contact with, both friends and strangers, live an entirely different world than us. Even if they live in the same city. They have grown up differently. They have had different experiences. I think we can all agree on that. Which should give us a little more compassion and understanding when it comes to those we share our world with. In addition, this should be exciting. When you interact with someone, you are getting a glimpse into an entirely different world! It is like traveling to a different universe without leaving earth. Their experiences, the people the do and the thoughts they think are unique to them. We should not only seek to understand that difference, but relish in the opportunity to experience it! Have you ever thought of friendship in this way?

THE BATTLE OF A LIFETIME

With Monday fast approaching, everyone is thinking of the battles they have to face. Getting up and out of bed when we would rather not. Dealing with traffic and coworkers we would much rather do without. How many of us consider the greatest battle of all; the battle against ourself? Even the previously mentioned challenges are more a battle of our perception, than our actual reality. Changing our mindset and our heart is what will change our life. That is certainly easier said than done. Fighting that battle is what will give us that amazing life we have been seeking.

On the surface I realize that this may sound a little like self-improvement mumbo jumbo, but let us pause and take a look at it. Start with having to get up early and get out of bed when we do not want to. I start work at 4am, and have to leave the most beautiful woman behind, so trust me when I tell you that I know the struggle. Here is what else I know. Four years ago I died briefly. It is with great fortune and grace that I am still here. There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about that. Another aspect to consider is that I have a job. There are so many that are hurting and looking to make ends meet. Is it the perfect job for me? Absolutely not, but it is one that allows me to pay the bills and pursue my passions of writing as well. The lovely lady that I have to leave? Each morning that I feel sad to leave her, I also am grateful she is there. Having someone you love that much in your life is a blessing. Even if you do not have a job yet, or a wonderful relationship, you do have life. The potential to improve is there every day. It can be gone in an instant. Make the most of it while it is here.

Looking at the other two items we mentioned, commute and coworkers, they also can be viewed differently and therefore felt differently. My morning journey to work is about 35 minutes give or take. That all depends on traffic and the ever present construction. In addition to the fact that I am alive to experience the commute, I think about the world we live in. There are paved roads, we have climate controlled cars and public transportation. Yes, roads can be bumpy and filled with potholes, but it sure beats dirt or no road at all. Do we all have our dream vehicle? Maybe not, but it beats having to ride on horse through rain and snow.

You may be tempted to dismiss all of this as a mere change in state of mind. It is, but that is the point. Developing this change will transform how your life feels. Can you imagine how that change of focus could affect your life? Is it easy to do? Of course not. That is why it is a battle every day. Is it worth it? It is as valuable as digging in a mine of pure gold! What are some of the ways that you can improve your mindset?

LET US POSTPONE NOTHING!

There is a cliche that says, “If you live each day like your last, one day you’ll be right.” That is uncomfortably true. As we have discussed numerous times on this site, the funny thing about death is that it seldom calls ahead. Even if you know you the end is near, you are often in a comprised state unable to fulfill all of your desires.

Keeping this in mind, it would be wise for us to start living this way today. There are things that take energy, vitality and time that we should begin today. If you wait until the grim reaper sends you a telegram, it can often be too late.

An added bonus to living this lifestyle is that it brings peace of mind. When you are living life to the fullest, and know it, it is far easier to lay your head on the pillow at night. How about you? Are you living life to the fullest? Are you going to face your end with peace or with regret?

BEAUTY IN THE NEAR DARKNESS

Most of you know I leave for work at 4am. On Monday this follows a night of being a DJ that has me home around 1am. That’s a tough turnaround. I have a fairly long commute. Going on 2 hours of sleep it can be difficult to maintain a grateful and positive attitude on occasion.

There are, however, many things that are a beautiful observation should I pay attention. The sun just beginning to rise this time of year created the amazing image above. That one you can’t help but notice. There are a few that are a little more subtle, but just as heartwarming.

About halfway to work I drive down a more secluded and quiet street. I enjoy the lack of stoplights, and the wildlife. One other thing I at every morning is an elderly couple going for their morning walk. They hold hands and look so loving. I hope to be doing the same with my lovely lady when we reach their age.

The point is, even with 2 hours of sleep heading in to a 9 hour workday, there are still plenty of things to make me smile. The only requirement is to be on the lookout for them. How about you? What are some of the things you are grateful for every morning?

IF YOU WANT TO BELIEVE THE WORLD IS BEAUTIFUL

What we surround ourselves with, both people and environment, go a long way in influencing what we think the reality of the world is. It can be hard not to consume all of the information that is being forced at us through a variety of different media. Especially when the world is as crazy as it is right now. I know this is something I have to do better with myself. This is not advocating ignorance. It is just a call to not inundate ourselves with it. A little goes a long way with the news. It is like listening to chicken little tell you that the sky is falling. Sooner or later you are bound to start thinking the clouds are getting a little lower.

There are so many beautiful spots in nature to enjoy. Being out in the natural world, especially if you disconnect from technology for a bit, helps you appreciate all of the beauty that surrounds us. It can be a great reminder that we need when life becomes too busy. When you are out exploring, take time to visit natural areas. Above is a photo I took when Margie and I had visited Negril Jamaica a few years back. It is in a region called Fern gully. All of the places we stay are gorgeous to be sure, but it sure was nice to get out to a peaceful natural area. Seeing different plants that are not native to the region we live in, as well as birds and animals, was so exciting while at the same time peaceful. Just as it is important to get to know local people, I think getting to know local nature is just as important.

You may not be in the financial state to be able to afford an exotic vacation. Not to mention that you should not wait to explore nature until then. Quite the contrary. You should surpass your consumption of news with how many trips into nature you take. Fortunately, for most of us there is nature not that far away. Neighborhood parks and trails provide an opportunity to get lost in nature without leaving your own neighborhood. Above is a picture of the path my mother and I were walking on last year in a local park. As you can see, there was plenty of nature to be observed that day.

Another great opportunity to view nature is to befriend someone who also enjoys exploring nature. This works great whether that person lives near you and can recommend great spots to explore, or if they live further away and share their pictures of places they explore. A great member of this community, Eduardo, lives in Italy and shares many great pictures of the places he explores. I feel like I share in his adventures when I look at them. It is also a great picture of the natural beauty that exists in his corner of the world.

How about you? Can you think of a place of natural beauty to explore and take a break from all of the crazy news out there? Even if exploring is not your thing, or if you are physically limited, you can sit on a park bench and watch the nature around you. Take in the sights, sounds and smells of the natural world. Your soul and spirit will leave refreshed and better able to take on the world. Not to mention your perception of the world will be much improved.

IMPORTANT PASSWORD INFORMATION!

The other morning I was listening to a video by Tony Robbins and I would like to share with you a little of what I got out of that video. In it he referenced Jim Rohn, his mentor. That is where the idea comes from.

The idea revolves around passwords. It seems today we have a password for everything. We have a password for our cellphones. We certainly do not want just anyone being able to get into there! We have passwords for our computer. Even things like online shopping and social media have passwords. Even logging on to the platform I write this blog on has a password. Just in case any of you would want to come on here and write an inspiring post for me. Actually, if you would like to be a guest author, we can work on that.

The one thing that we need to guard does not come with a password. That is our minds. You must stand guard at the gate of your mind. We are almost force-fed information from a variety of sources. We hear the news, family, friends and coworkers just to name a few. Many are like chicken little telling us the sky is falling and how terrible the world is. Some give us gossip about other people that may only be true to some degree or maybe not true at all. We often let this all inside our mind without deciding if it belongs there. We must safeguard our minds my friends. The place between your ears is the most powerful spot in our lives. It deserves just as much guarding as our cell phone or computer. WE decide what goes into our minds. Let us make sure not everyone has the password.

THE WEEK AHEAD

The quote here applies to all genders. As we are in the middle of another work week, keep this in mind. Plenty of people and circumstances will test your patience and resolve. True strength is being able to remain calm in the middle of chaos.

Why is remaining calm so important? When we react with emotions, we seldom make good decisions both in our words and actions. This tends to make our situation even worse. When we act from a calm state of mind, we speak and act with a better state of mind. This may help us out of chaos. At the very least, it will not take us further in it.

Remaining calm in the middle of chaos is not easy, but it is worth it.

WHO GETS TO LIVE LIKE THIS?

Have you ever had one of those reminders that give you that kick in the butt you need? We all can fall victim of some less than empowering thinking. On my way to write today i was lamenting that the sun was not shining and I was feeling tired and a little less than inspired. Then a song came on the radio that changed everything.

The song was Who Gets to Live Like This,by Jimmy Buffett. In the song, Jimmy describes his life and how grateful he is for it. Living in the beach, the mail, and money, come by boat. He just has to relax and write songs. Swap ‘songs’ for ‘books’ and that would be the life for me!

I almost fell into the trap of thinking of how far away from this life I was. I live in a climate that is anything but tropical. I must get up at 4am to go to a day job. Then I thought about a post I had recently written explaining how we should be grateful for the blessings we have and the troubles we don’t.

Suddenly, my thinking began to shift to what was amazing about my situation. This morning I woke up and had a cup of Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee. Which is my favorite. I had some breakfast my thoughtful sister brought me. I was able to share both of those with a beautiful lady who happens to be marrying me. Yes, I have to go to a job, but it is only 5 days a week and allows me to pursue my passion.

We often need these reminders. Even those of us well-versed in the field of self-improvement. Here is the quandary and the solution. What do we do when we don’t have an inspiring song come on the radio? We must craft and schedule tools of strategies that inspire us! Develop morning rituals that empower us. Leave the house inspired and grateful! What tools and strategies can you think of that would do this? Share your ideas with the rest of us!

THE 2 THINGS HAPPINESS IS ALL ABOUT

Today is Friday! At least that is the day this post comes out. Let us go into the weekend refreshing our mindset. In a world where everything is available at our fingertips, or can be delivered to our front door, it is understandable that we live in a state of wanting more. There is always the ‘next big thing’. People want the latest phone, the latest streaming service or the newest thing.

It is not bad to want the best, but at what cost? It is one thing to feel this way with material goods, but seldom does emotion stay in one place. Suddenly we are wanting more from our friends, our family and even our spouse. This not only causes fractures in relationships, but has us living in a state of lack.

When you always want more, then you never feel like you have enough. You feel unsatisfied. Even if you do get more, you still feel empty. What is the solution? Gratitude. When you switch to being grateful for what you do have, you feel abundant instead of lacking. When you do get more, you feel blessed and favored. It is a much happier life.

You can increase that feeling of gratitude when you consider how many problems you do not have. You have an illness or disease? I’m not here to tell you to be happy about that, but consider what you don’t have. There are roughly 20,000 human diseases. We should be glad we don’t have more than we do.

The 2 secrets of happiness are not that complicated. Be happy for the blessings you do have and be grateful for the problems you do not have. If you were to focus on these two things before bed and when you arise, your life would be amazing.