Tag: Happiness

It makes scents

In two other posts we shared how to use two of the senses to infuse joy into your life.  We used hearing in the post titled ‘Happy CD’ and we used vision in the post titled ‘Vision Board’.  If you are not familiar with those I would suggest going back in the archives and rereading them.  Well we are now moving on to our third sense, smell.  How powerful is the sense of smell.  Some say it is one of the most powerful senses for bringing up memories.  Realtors use the scent of baking chocolate chip cookies to try to sell homes.  Here is a more powerful example I heard of recently.  A medical university studied the power of smell on a group of rats.  Now I know what your thinking, rats are not people.  In which case I encourage you to come check out the bar I work at.  In all seriousness, here is how the experiment went.  The had two groups of rats, one the injected with a chemical that causes cancer.  Just enough where it would begin to tear down the rats cells, but not enough to cause the cancer to grow.  In the second group they gave a super vitamin shot to.  After doing both they filled the rat’s tank with the smell of camphor.  They did this over and over.  Finally all they did was release the scent of camphor with no chemicals.  What do you think happened? The one group of rats continued to progress towards developing cancer while the other group continued their upward healthy spiral.

So how can we apply this to you and me?  Well if we are trying to sell our homes, bake cookies and stay away from rats that smell like camphor.  Seriously, think of a fragrance that you enjoy.  I rather like the scent of coconut because it reminds me of vacation and lovely ladies covered in tanning oil.  I also like the scent of spiced rum, but if you were to go around smelling rum, you may be tempted to drink said rum and that may not always be appropriate.  Back to our post today.  I suggest figuring out what scent inspires you.  Does the scent of pine make you think of the woods and adventure?  Vanilla give you a warm and fuzzy feeling? Whatever it is, get yourself a nice bottle of essential oils.  I know a lot of people like ‘Young Living’ oils, but any quality essential oil will do.  A lot of homeopathic stores, or organic grocery stores will have them.  Keep it in your car, at the office, or wherever you may need it.  I have a bottle of peppermint at the office that gives me a quick pick me up with I need it. Just one more quick tool to change your state when you need it

IT DOESN’T JUST HAPPEN

Sometime in our life we went from being the adventure seeking young child, to the adult waiting for life to happen to us.  A view that also affects our view of happiness. I was told the other day that someone was “Never happy, but it’s not their fault because nothing ‘happy’ ever happens to them”.  Here is when a slight change in perception can make all the difference.  Going back to that adventurous toddler, when we are young, we seek out happiness, we don’t just sit in our cribs and wait for it to ‘happen to us’ much to the chagrin of our parents.  When we grow older, however, lots of us just sit in the house and watch tv waiting for something happy to happen.  Here is when a good definition of what happy means to you would certainly help.  While enjoying a cup of coffee at the local Starbucks with a group of friends the other day, I asked them what would make them happy. There were two very different kinds of happiness expressed.  There was what I shall call ‘high excitement’ happiness. The “brand new sports car” “winning the lottery” “night in Vegas” to the ‘low excitement’ variety, “having the dishes done” “a good book and a bottle of wine” “a nice long walk in the woods with my dog”.  Although these answers are very different, they both work for the people who said them. So I asked, why are you not working toward saving for that trip to Vegas? How about working with you spouse to schedule some time alone for a book and a glass of wine.  Sometimes we forget a little pursuing on our behalf, and a change in perspective can make all the difference. Plus, let’s be honest, we all deserve it! Have an amazing day my friends!

THINK…BACKWARDS…

So often I hear people say, “I’m in such a bad mood and I don’t even know why” I must confess to having felt that way before.  This can be a rather perfect scenario for being happy.  Now you may be wondering if I have completely lost my mind.  While that has yet to be determined, at least let me explain my last statement.  When it comes to adding more joy to your life, as with any worthwhile goal, one of the greatest challenges lies in just knowing how.  Let’s face it, if there was a simple step by step plan to a happy life, wouldn’t we all follow it?  One of the greatest challenges I have had in both putting together both this website and my book is people are different.  What makes one person happy, well it may not work for the next person.  So how can we discover what truly makes us happy and develop a formula to continually accomplish that?  I have two suggestions and they are complete opposites and involve thinking backwards. Now before I loose everyone completely, let’s take a step back.  Here is the first method. Even in the darkest of lives there are moments if not days when things just seem to be going your way.  Think back have you ever had one of those days where you are just happy with the world?  Here is a suggestion, try retracing your steps.  What do I mean?  Simple, start from how you are feeling and work back through your day.  Perhaps you had completed a project you were working on?  Maybe you brought a smile to the face of a friend or even a complete stranger.  Maybe you just finished listening to one of your favorite songs on the radio, or working out.  It will be different for everyone, and there may be a few things in there that just seem kind of crazy, but if they lead you to happiness…who cares!  The point here is to look at what makes up a great day for you.  Perhaps write them down on a list, or in a person journal (more on that in later in the week).  Ok, so perhaps you haven’t had one of those days in a while? Maybe you can’t remember what made you so happy, or just want to enjoy the feeling without trying to figure it out. Fair enough.  Even if you find yourself having a miserable day, it is cause to get excited!  Why would feeling miserable be anything to be excited about you may ask.  This is why, it works the same way as being happy.  If you’re having a bad day, stop and think about all the things that transpired to bring you to that point.  Make a list of those things too.  Not only will you come up with a list of things you would do well to eliminate from your life, but if you look at the opposite of those things, you have the seeds for what will make you happy.  So even knowing what you dislike can be a very healthy thing.  If you were to say, I dislike all the negative people I run into.  You will know limiting your exposure to negative people might be something you wish to work on.  You may also phrase it as “adding more positive people to my life would make it better”.  So as this week continues, try thinking backwards and form a plan for your own happiness.  A plan that would be as unique as the person writing it!

THE TIME IS NOW!!

“My creed is: Happiness is the only good. The place to be happy is here. The time to be happy is now. The way to be happy is to make others so.”

-Robert Ingersoll

During breakfast the other day I was part of a conversation as to the obligation to keep company with people and situations that do not bring you joy.  To me the notion that you should subject yourself to unpleasant situations merely because that person is your relative, or the situation is something ‘everyone expects you to be at’ is to me antiquated and ridiculous.  So I am giving you all an excuse now.  If the person or situation does not give you joy, don’t be around them. The reason here is really two-fold. First, we were given this life to enjoy.  If you are not enjoying your life, you are wasting your life. Second, you can’t very well bring joy to others if you, yourself are not full of joy.  I am not saying there are not people and moments that may be less than a thrill (the dentist comes to mind for me) but if you have honestly done your best to bring joy to the situation and it does not seem to be taking hold, then it is not in line with you living a positive rewarding life.  To suffer through an evening with relatives or people you do not enjoy merely out of a sense of obligation does nobody any good.  It does not bring joy to the people you are with as it is usually apparent you are not enjoying yourself.  Not to mention the joy you could be having and experiencing with good friends.  So next time you find yourself dreading another situation ask yourself if you are doing it merely because you feel obligated, and will your presence there do any good? If that is indeed the case, my suggestion is to politely excuse yourself and treat yourself to an evening of fun. Whatever you do, feeling guilty should not be it. Remember if it doesn’t bring you joy, it certainly won’t bring others joy either.

THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING HAPPY

Since I started this site I have had a few people tell me, “I like what your doing, but I have no time to be happy. I have to pay the pills and make dinner for my kids. I can’t worry about making myself happy. I have to concentrate on what is important”.  That statement surpises me and yet it doesn’t.  A lot of the influences we hear tell us that to worry about ourselves and our own happiness is selfish.  We are taught to  ‘put others before ourselves’.  So why is being happy so important? Why should we spend so much time worrying about what makes us or others happy?  Well we could look at the scientific facts that have been mentioned in the media so often.  A positive attitude helps us live longer,  boost our immune system, heal from injury quicker.  Even if you have no interest in living a longer healthier life, although I am not sure who wouldn’t, happiness is still more important than most of us realize.  It reduces our stress levels and allows us better to face the challenges that always pop up at the most unexpected times.  How often we regret reacting to a mild irritation in a severe way just because our thoughts were already focused on some other trouble.  It leaves hurt feelings and turns another situation from bad to worse.  If we do our best to keep our thoughts focused on the joy that life offers us and adding more to our lives, then we shall see situations as they are.  For those of you that are familiar with the Law of attraction, which states like attracts like.  It should be apparent why being happy is so important.  If you are happy you attract more happiness into your life, if you are unhappy you will be more likely to be faced with negative situations again and again.

So if we are busy focused on our own happiness, what should we bother worrying about others happiness?  Well, recently that was shown to me in a dramatic and tragic way.  A wonderful co-worker of mine took his own life a few days ago.  When such an event happens we are always left with the same questions “how could I not know?”, and “What could I have done?”.  Truth is, most of the time there is nothing we could have done, and no way we would’ve known.  In this case by all accounts this gentleman was filled with good humor and had a real zest for life.  Which stresses the importance even more.  We never know what is going on in someones world.  So consider that when dealing with the cheery lady at the coffee shop, or the grumpy cashier at the grocery store.  We are never sure when someone may need that genuine compliment, or sign of gratitude from us.  How important can happiness be?  It can be a matter of life and death, for both ourselves and those we care about.

GRATITUDE

Gratitude, a simple word, yet few of us realize how powerful it can be. It should be fairly obvious that expressing gratitude t0 others can certainly make them feel appreciated. What many of us may not think of is what having a grateful state of mind can do for ourselves. Someone once said it is impossible to be fearful and be grateful at the same time. I would like to add ‘upset’, ‘angry’, ‘depressed’ and a host of other undesirable emotions to that list. I encourage you to challenge that theory. Compose a list of things you are truly grateful for. Make this a list of heartfelt items. Keep this list with you in a pocket or a purse for about a week. Read it upon waking, right before retiring and one other time during the day. As you read your list do your best to feel the gratitude as well as read the list. All three times should take around 5 minutes of your day. Try this for one week and let me know the positive changes you notice. Today is thanksgiving, a good day to start compiling your list. After a week you may wish to make every day thanksgiving. Live with Love my friends!