Tag: Happiness

REASON TO HANG IN THERE

Isn’t it rough when 2 tough days seem to come back to back? That is what happened to me the other day. Nothing too tragic, just feeling worn out and life putting me through the ringer. We have all had that sort of run of luck. One of the things I do in that situation is refer to my list of things that fill me with energy and joy. The day prior to this one, I had gone for a walk with my mother in the park. We usually see plenty of natural beauty and get a little fitness in as well. The day prior, for some reason, we did not see a single animal. I also seemed to have a tough time with the fitness part. My body seemed to ache everywhere. The weather here is up and down this time of year and I am sure that played into it.

I also love grocery shopping when I am in a funk. For some reason, that seems to lift my spirits. My mother and I had been meaning to stop by this small grocery store for a few months and both decided that this day would be a good one to do so. On the drive there is was raining and traffic was understandably slow due to the weather. No sunshine was to be had. It seemed even a trip to one of my favorite stores would be a trying journey. As we shopped, I did my best to be in the moment. I looked for fun new items to put into the cart to bring home to Margie for us to try. Slowly, the funk of the last 2 days lifted. I pushed the cart out of the store hoping the rain was not too bad. To my surprise, I saw the image above – a double rainbow! The mood started to lift even more. We stopped to take several pictures; as you can see. That had us feeling a little more cheery.

The next day when we decided to try our luck walking in the park, we saw 4 Blue Herons. This is my favorite local bird. Some sightings were rather close and they seemed generally unconcerned by our appearance. We both got to take pictures and spend some time gazing at this wonderful bird. We went on to see some green herons, a muskrat and two deer that seemed just as interested in watching us as we were in watching them! Just the day before, it had seemed if every animal had left the park and now we were able to see several! Proof if you stick out the tough storms in life there will eventually be a double rainbow (or a Blue Heron) to brighten your day. This also had me thinking of another factor. The day before, it was cool and gloomy and our mood was not the best. Did that have something to do with our luck? I am not sure. It does seem when you are in a good emotional state, more wonderful things seem attracted to you.

If you find yourself in a funk, do these 2 things. First, hang in there. The storms of life will come and go. Make sure you do not come and go with them. Stay strong and know the sun will return eventually. Also, do your best to find something to be grateful for and feel good about. Even if it is a little thing, it will begin to change your state. This will open the door to even more good!

ANOTHER WAY TO BEAT LIFE’S CHALLENGES

Last post we talked about the frustration of road construction and how we can view it differently. I am going to share another method for not being set back by life’s little challenges. This great and power secret (which really isn’t a secret at all) is to find the humor in the situation. Like the meme I found above in regards to road construction signs. I never thought about how the ‘end road work’ sign could sound like a protest. It made me laugh out loud when I read it. Guess what happens every time I pass one of these signs? You guessed it, I chuckle to myself. This is particularly good because I am usually just leaving some road construction I have just driven through.

Steve Rizzo calls this ‘getting in touch with your humor being’. He says that when stuck in traffic he talks like the lion from Wizard of Oz. Why? Because it makes everything more humorous. What if you picked your favorite comedian and tried to imagine the situation through their eyes? I find Groucho Marx works good for this, but that is a personal preference. What about a famed explorer? How about a television reporter who is covering your situation? A narrator in the movie of your life? “Margie looked down at the floor to discover the bag of powdered sugar she was carrying had left a trail showing where she had been.” Does this sound a little absurd or insane to you? Good! Life can be both a little absurd and insane. Go with it.

Doing this does two very important things for us. First, it adds something to laugh at. The more time you spend smiling and laughing in life, the better your life is. Second, and perhaps more importantly, it reduces the amount of stress in a situation. It may even transform it into a situation that causes you to laugh. Do you know what you call a life that has less stress and more laughter? A better one! Who would not want a less stressful, more joyful life? I know I would!

I will continue to search for the humor in life. Lucky for me, and for all of us, life is constantly supplying us with situations full of humor if we are looking for them. I have a lady that also supplies a great deal of humor. If you are not so blessed as to have a spouse who does the same, there are plenty of ways to add humor to your life. You can add an app to your phone that sends a joke a day. Perhaps get a group of friends together that look for funny signs. That way you all are working to bring humor to the group. What about a funny day by day calendar? How about joining a humorous social media page? The more ways you find humor in life, the more ways YOU win!

Road construction

Sometimes your life improving can be as simple as changing your perspective. This was brought home by something very common, yet very frustrating – road construction. In Wisconsin, where I live, there seems to be two seasons, winter and road construction. By the time the ice and snow on the roads disappear, they are replaced by orange barrels. This can lead to many unpleasant surprises. This can range from the simply frustrating longer commute times, to the more expensive flat tires and repair to your cars suspension system.

This had been taken a step further this year in my very own neighborhood. I live on the east side of our fine city. Most of what I enjoy doing is in the west part of the city. Normally, not too much of an issue. The drive is roughly 10 to 15 minutes for most places. That is until recently. They closed two of the main streets that connect where I live to the west part of the city. Just the other day, I went to pick up some flyers I had made up for my upcoming book signing. This should have been a 10 minute trip. It ended up being a 20 minute trip. With the current price of gasoline, this was a bit irritating. What I did learn was an entirely new way to get to where I was going. It also showed me a few different businesses I had either forgotten about, or never knew about. It was taking this detour that introduced me to them.

Another good thing about this detour caused by road construction, it caused me to use my brain. Often, we can get in a rut. How many of you take the same route to work every day? You drive on autopilot almost. When one street is closed, it can throw us for a loop. Much like no longer having to remember phone numbers because they are all stored in our phones, our brains tend to get a little lazy. What were to happen if we were in an emergency situation and we had lost our cell phone? Would we still be able to contact our work or our loved ones? By having to consciously come up with a new route to travel, and having to be alert on that route, my brain was getting a little bit of a workout. What happens if we never make our bodies workout? Do you not the same result could happen to a mind that no longer has to work?

Viewing the inconvenience of the road closer in this light, I found I had a lot to be grateful for. The new path caused me to be more alert and forced my brain to put in a little more effort. With cerebral decline becoming an issue the older we get, it is wise to take advantage of any brain workout we can fit in. The detour also introduced me to a host of new businesses and some that I forgot about. It allowed me to see a different part of my city I may have never had the reason to explore. These reasons turned the curse of road construction into a blessing. Next time orange barrels block or slow your progress, think of what benefits you may get out of the situation.

THE RIGHT KIND OF LABOR

Today is a day where we are scheduled to take a well-deserved break from our labors. I think this is important. It is also helpful to recognize all of the sacrifices those before us have made to create the safe working conditions we now enjoy. As we are contemplating all of this, may I humbly suggest another thought to consider? If you are looking to have a fulfilling and successful life, one way to assure that, is to find a need and fill it. If you can help enough people get what they want, they will help you get what you want.

Today, I suggest we spend a moment thinking of how our labors can best serve others. No matter what your occupation, it helps serve others. A focus on that aspect can not only help improve our performance, but also help us stay motivated and understand what a difference we make. If you are not content with the way your current occupation serves the greater good, perhaps you can pursue a passion on the side that is more in line with your values? You may find yourself switching occupations all together! If the world needs anything, it is more people pursuing their passions and doing their best to serve others. How can you do this?

WHAT WE CAN DO ON A BAD DAY

Bad days, we all have them. Certainly, there are things we can do to minimize the possibility of one occurring, but there are just too many variables for us to contend with. One thing we have complete control over is the state of mind and attitude that we bring to each day. We all know people who can face the worst circumstances and have it bounce off of them like nothing ever happened. There are people who seem to turn every disadvantage to a learning and growing experience. Wouldn’t it be great to be one of those people?

We can! It only takes working on one thing – our attitude. We cannot know what variables are coming our way, nor can we hope to control them all. Trying to control every aspect of our lives, which often includes the lives and opinions of others, will drive us crazy. Just ask any micromanager. All we can control is our attitude towards life and its challenges. The way we do this is to surround ourselves with inspiring things such as calendars, screen savers and pictures. We also listen to empowering things on our daily commute. We read inspiring material. It is even more powerful if we do so to begin our day.

If you want to be a person who does not fall victim to every challenge in life, forget working on controlling everything. Switch your focus on controlling just one thing – your attitude.

BE THE LIGHT 💡

This picture was sent to me by Terri, a friend of Margie and mine. In a world where there appears to be a lot of darkness, it can often feel uninspiring. I am often asked how people can remain positive in a world that seems bent on making sure we are surrounded by negativity. This is a really good question. It can be difficult. It used to be that you would have to to seek out negativity. This could be by opening a newspaper or turning on a television. Now the negativity follows us. It will even send us a little alert in our pocket. “Hello, negativity here. Come see what is wrong with the world.” It might not be that straight forward, but will disguise itself as a social media notification. Worse yet, everyone else is subjected to this same negative atmosphere and will be happy to walk up and share it with you. Many times you do not have to even ask.

How then, with all of this negative influence, can we hope to have a positive, and amazing, life? The answer is almost counterintuitive, we must give one. This isn’t a post about the law of attraction or a testament to the biblical saying of “As you sow, so shall you reap.” It does, however, give credence to both. I am going to give you two quick and personal examples of the application of this strategy in real life.

I have told this first story on this blog and in my second book, Living the Dream, but it bares a quick recap. There was a point in my life that I was facing the loss of a job, personal problems at home, a car that was breaking down and other life-altering problems. They began to consume me and I had a hard time seeing any solution. In an effort to get out of my head, I decided to put in extra time at a meal program I volunteered at. I did this despite the fact that I may very well need it in the not so distant future. Two things happened that day. First, I saw people in far worse situations than I was in with far better attitudes. Second, I realized that I had a gift to serve and to inspire others. By giving the people that came that day not only the gift of food, but of respect and kindness, I could see their burden lighten. In turn, that lightened my burden as well.

The second example is more current and ongoing. As most of you know, during the day I work for the United States Postal Service. This is an institution that seems constantly gripped with staff shortage, political upheaval, and a general feeling of stress. The employees are often pushed to do as much work as they can until they, or their bodies, give up. All of this often happens in a combative and stressful work environment. Honestly, this could be greatly improved with some communication and appreciation. Unfortunately, by the time someone is in a position of management they can be too bitter to offer much of this. The result? Workers and bosses find themselves fighting against each other all while trying to accomplish a near impossible job. This can all feel pretty hopeless on any given day. My solution? Be the one who brings the communication and appreciation. I am constantly letting people know they did their job well, or offering a bit of encouragement. Sadly, I am often told that I am the only one who does so. One of the greatest feelings is when you hear the lines of encouragement you offer repeated by those who have received them.

I like to think of a dark room. What happens when you flip a light switch? The darkness disappears. The same can be said with kindness. Start with just one person and soon that light and that kindness will begin to spread. You will help create a positive world around you.

PARKS,PIZZA, AND WEED KILLER

I had the most amazing day, the other day. The picture above gives the answer why. It is not only that I really like Winnie-the-Pooh and his attitude towards life. There was much more that went into this amazing day. Have you ever had a moment that changes your whole day? I had one of those. Normally, this would have to occur early for this to happen. That is one of the many things that made this day different. It happened late at night. Still, it transformed the entire day. The other different thing about this day was that it involved the three things mentioned in the title. Parks, pizza, and weed killer are normally not the recipe for success. Please allow me to explain.

My day began at 4:45am, as it does most weekdays. I woke up to my alarm and prepared to go to my day job at the post office. Once there, I went through my normal routine. Towards the end of the day, I noticed the weeds were getting out of hand and decided to take care of the matter. There were some containers of weed killer. This particular kind had a sprayer that allowed for a continuous spray. I walked around the entire post office taking care of all the weeds. This took roughly an hour. It was nice out and there were plenty of birds to keep me company. I listened to an audiobook as I sprayed.

Later in the day, my mom and I went on one of our nature walks. We choose a path that we both enjoy, but had somehow avoided the entire year. The weather was perfect. There was green growth everywhere. Plenty of birds of all different kinds. Everywhere we looked, nature seemed to be providing a scene that could be turned into a jigsaw puzzle. The picture above is just one example of what we saw as we walked along. We ended up doing a little more than 4 miles when neither one of us thought we would be able to walk very far when we started. My mother even mentioned just doing a mile. We were so caught up in enjoying the scenery we forgot to stop.

After our walk in the park, we stopped at the grocery store. Margie had found a good sale and my mom and I were going to pick up some things we needed. It ended up being more than just a few things. This often happens when you go to the grocery store with an appetite worked up by a 4 mile walk. By the time our shopping trip was done and I returned home, it was a little to late to prepare the delicious meal that Margie had been planning. I was a little disappointed until we settled on ordering….a pizza! Little not so secret about me – I could eat pizza every meal, every day of the week if given the chance.

As we both sat enjoying our delicious pizza and salad, it happened. I was thinking how delicious the pizza was. It was fresh, the perfect temperature and had all the ingredients I love on it. Then, I looked up and thought how delicious the lady next to me was. She looked so beautiful, has all the ingredients I enjoy and is always hot. I thought how lucky I was to be enjoying such a moment. Then, I thought about the walk through the park. I literally was beauty in every direction. My mother and I shared some great conversation and got some exercise in as well. Even the trip to the grocery store was fun. I saved a lot of money and got some good deals. I was grateful I could afford to do so. I pushed back even further and thought about the morning spent with the weed killer, the birds and the audiobook (another possible title for this blog) and thought what a wonderful day this had been.

The feeling that overcame me was one of extreme gratitude. Not everything worked out as I was hoping. I would have liked to be able to sleep in and not have to go to work. I would have liked to have seem some deer on the walk. I would have enjoyed the wonderful meal Margie and I had been planning. If I had thought about all of that, the day would have felt like a miserable failure. What changed everything, was focusing on what I was grateful for. I had a nice day at work that included time outside to myself. We had a great walk that included beautiful scenery and plenty of birds. I was able to afford the groceries I did get. We did end up eating pizza which I love and I have that amazing meal to look forward to tonight. Plus, I get to enjoy them both with the most beautiful woman.

The fact here is that the power of focus and the power of gratitude can transform any day. Had my focus been on what the day lacked, it would have turned a great day into one that felt like a failure. By focusing on gratitude, it transformed my day into one of the greatest I have had in a long time. It also allowed me to enjoy everything and everyone in the day more. I wrapped my arms around Margie and slept more peaceful than I can remember doing in quite some time. Now, thinking about that, I am already looking forward to today! It is amazing how powerful gratitude and focus can be. I am grateful for this reminder!

FIND A REASON TODAY🙂

In every day, there is a reason to smile. Sometimes we have to search harder than on other days. I would love to know your reason for smiling today. If we all share we can discover many more reasons to smile. So, what is your reason for smiling today?

TIME FLIES WHEN YOU ARE… UM… GETTING OLD?

There are certain things I recall hearing as a child that made absolutely no sense to me. One of them was, “Once you get older, time really seems to fly.” I recall thinking how absurd this sounded. A day is a day, a week is a week and a year is a year, no matter how old you are. Then it happened – I got old. Where some people may debate as to what age this happens, there is a certain intellectual stage you reach where I think life starts to change. Perhaps it is because I am at an age where I have lived more years than I have left to live? I am on the downhill, if you care to look at it that way. There is a quote from the movie The Crow, which is a movie I rather enjoy, in which the bad guy says “Childhood is over the moment you know you’re gonna die.” I am not sure I 100% agree with this. I believe that realizing you are going to die is one of the best motivations to start living. I do think something changes though. There is a certain sober reality that sets in.

When this happens, I think the time speeding up issue begins. In my case, my vacation, and the warm weather, is drawing to a close soon. It seems like yesterday that I was wishing for warmer weather. It also feels like the cooler weather comes quicker every year. In an odd twist of fate, it seems the colder weather lasts longer. I am going to have to figure that one out. It seems that I have been working on putting together my third book and podcast for a while and time just seems to fly by. The question becomes, “How does this happen?” and “What can we do to hold on to time?”

Most of us take the approach of this guy in the picture above. We run around trying to ‘catch time’. Oddly enough, this can have the opposite effect. I think the answer to both of our questions can be found in the picture at the beginning of this post. I believe the best way to treasure a moment and to hang on to time is to become more present. In a world where more and more information is flying at us, and we feed on distraction, it is a real battle to be present. If you do not believe me, look where any large group is gathered and count the amount of people who are staring at cell phones. It seems this percentage increases by the day. If it involves waiting of any kind, the percentage can approach 100%. Sure, it is no fun to wait, but often that might be the only time we have to ourselves and our thoughts. We may think of and notice things that we miss in our busy world.

What is crazy is how often we do this when we could be better involved in far more pleasurable activities. I see couples out to dinner where both of them are sitting across from each other on their phones. In a few years, I would imagine these couples will either wonder where all the time went, or find themselves drifting apart wondering why their connection has seemed to lesson. The same holds true for families, friends and even coworkers. It is not just cell phones. There are video games, computers and a million other distractions. None of these things are bad in and of themselves. We just need to practice them all in moderation.

We could fill this website with ways that can help you remain present. There are a few articles on here to do so. There are also books, cds and many other resources that could assist in this activity. My suggestion? Take time throughout the day to be an active observer of your environment. What this means is to notice every sound you hear. Note every smell that is in the air. Take time to really listen and appreciate those you are spending time with. When you eat, for example, slow down and notice subtle flavors, textures and scent of the food instead of trying to consume it quickly so you can move on to your next activity. I would LOVE to hear your suggestions for slowing down time and savoring the good moments.

GIVE YOUR LIFE A SAMPLE DAY😋

Many of you who follow this blog, and most of you who know me personally, know that I am spending this week on vacation at the Wisconsin State Fair. It is something I do every year. It is a place that brings me a great deal of joy and I love sharing that with people in my life. Margie, my mother and I have had a blast so far this year! We have seen many friends and folks we only seem to run into this time of year.

Yesterday, was Crazy Grazin day, as they call it. What it amounts to, is that you can try smaller portions, or portions of different food items at reduced prices. This is good if you are on a budget, or if you are like me, you like to try new things. As with many things in my life, this got me thinking on how we can apply this principle to living an amazing life. Then, an idea so obvious just popped into my head. Take a sample day in your life! What on earth does this mean?

It certainly can be fun to try small amounts of new culinary dishes to discover new things you like. This can be done by going out with friends and splitting different dishes. This is about more than just food, however. I recall one of the things I enjoy doing the most, riding my bicycle. I did this a lot as a kid. Then, I got my driver’s license and stopped doing it for a while. I recall how I started back into it. I was at Target, Walmart or some other large chain store and thought to myself, “I should get back into bicycling. It is cheap and healthy.” I spent somewhere in the neighborhood of $150 on a bike, a little more on things to go with it. Then I started bicycling again. The joy I felt as a kid came back and some weight I found as an adult went away! Then I discovered how much the world of bicycling had changed. At one point I owned a bicycle that was worth more than my car. It was ok, because at the time I was even biking to work a few days a week. The point is, I started out with a cheap bike and discovered how much I still enjoyed it before I went all in.

In your life, can you take a yoga class at the gym before investing in your own yoga mat, brick and whatever else one could spend money on in that arena? You can try to go for a run for a few weeks before purchasing expensive running shoes. You could do a paint and sip before buying a canvas and easel. Dip your toe in as many areas of life you can. There are always economical ways to discover your next great passion. I will be starting a podcast soon and have purchased some basic equipment. Once I learn what I am doing and discover if I like it, I may look to get more advanced stuff.

Do you have a story like my bicycle story where you have discovered a passion and went on to invest in it? Perhaps you are more in the podcasting phase and are investing in a new adventure right now? I would love to hear your story in the comments below!