Happy first day is summer to my friends in the northern hemisphere! This is my favorite day of the year. I am definitely a summer person. Love the sun and the warm weather.
Today is supposed to be the ‘longest day of the year’. Meaning that the sun rises the earliest and sets the latest. That kind of reminds me of life. We all have the same 24 hours. What determines the quality of our life is what we do with them. Is there more sunshine (positive and productive activity) or is it more darkness (negative and wasted energy).
Today, let the first day of summer remind us to have as much light and positivity in our 24 hours as we can!
This is a good thought. Every situation does not always serve us in the same way. For example, at my day job I have been working 55 hours a week for the last year. Certainly nice money, but had me burnt out. Now, they hired a coworker for me. It will be a lot less money, but I will be able to focus more on my writing and fitness more.
I could have cursed the fact for the last year I have not been able to spend as much time with Margie as I wanted, or I could have used the extra money to save for our wedding and pay off my car. Conversely, I could lament the fact that I will be earning a lot less or celebrate all the extra time I will be afforded.
Keep this thought in your head. “What is wrong is always available. But so it’s what’s right. ” There is always a sunny side of the street. You can find it when you practice an attitude of gratitude. I always tell people, “If you can’t find something to be grateful for, you aren’t trying very hard. ” Even being able to read these words means you have the gift of vision, access to the internet, and the freedom to view what interests you. We are followed in over 200 countries, but if you live in North Korea, you would not be able to view us.
The above example listed 3 or 4 things you could be grateful for. In any situation there is always something to be grateful for. Sometimes you have to search hard. Most times you do not. So don’t curse the seasons or your situation. Instead, plant and act accordingly. Remember, what is wrong is always available, but so is what’s right.
There are so many addictions out there. I do my best to make sure I am not addicted to too many things. I even give up caffeine 1 month a year. For an author that also works 60 hours a week, that’s kind of a big deal.
I confess to being addicted to making feel people feel good. Nothing lights me up more than knowing I made someone else’s life better! I’m addicted to the desire to make the world a better place. When my ears are filled with negative news, as happens to many of us, my mind immediately asks,”How can I do something to make the world better. “
That leads us to avoiding the addictionmentioned in the photo above – destination addiction! The thought that you will be happy ‘when’. When certain goals are achieved. When the weight is lost. When the addiction is overcome. We should be as addicted to the journey. Feeling the joy of life as it happens.
We spend 80% of lifeon the journey. Why only be happy 20% of the time?Sure, you can’t run a marathon, but did you notice you don’t get out of wind walking up a flight of stairs? You don’t fit in your favorite jeans, but maybe there is a little more room in your current ones?
One of the best examples to me is the brave people overcoming addiction. They are a great reminder that victory happens one day at a time. Every day is a new battle, but that means every day is a new chance at victory! Celebrate the journey. Celebrate the fact you have made it one more day. Do not become addicted to the destination!
This picture is great! Obviously a point about focus. You may be thinking, like I was, “Not me! I appreciate what Ihave!” Then I took another look at the picture and thought what I would do if someone handed me a cake with one slice missing. What would you do? Can you imagine going to the store buying a cake with one slice gone? What about a slice of cake? A lot less, but if someone handed you a slice of cake, you would not ask where the rest of the cake went.
People are a little like the cake. Most are not as sweet, but the theory is the same. If someone shared a lot with you, but kept one part of their life secret, we would feel like we were missing something. Like the cake with a slice missing. Yet, if someone were to share just a little with us, we would feel like they were giving us something a little special. Just like a slice of cake.
I live with the most beautiful baker, trust me when I tell you I know a thing or 2 about cake! Whether we are given a little, or a lot with just one thing missing we should appreciate what we have. Changing focus will take us from expectation to appreciation! Imagine how that could change your life!
I heard this strategy called “Strive Satisfied”. There are some really good things I liked about the premise behind it, but I think we could tweak it to have it work even better. The idea behind this strategy is to be satisfied with your life as it is, but striving to make it better. Again, I like the sound of that initially. The more I thought about it, the more of an issue that I had with the word ‘satisfied’. We all know there is great power to be had in the words we use. Subconsciously, the word ‘satisfied’ does not move one to action. It does quite the opposite. Satisfied, at least in my brain, is where you are contented to stop acting.
I would prefer to say “Strive Gratefully”. Being grateful for what you have as you are striving for ways to improve it makes a lot more sense to me. Grateful does not mean you are satisfied. When it comes to showing the woman I love how much she means to me and what an amazing person she is, I will never be satisfied. She continues to amaze me with her beauty in both appearance and action. If I was ‘satisfied’ with the way that I loved her, I am not sure the new version of her would receive the appreciation it so richly deserves.
Never being satisfied does not mean you will feel miserable. That is why I suggest to strive gratefully. I am beyond grateful for the love I share with my lady. The way we are improving our communication. The ways we can discover new things we enjoy, or might enjoy together. All I have to do is look at a picture of her and I feel grateful. One thing I never feel is satisfied. All I have to do is think back 2, 3, or 5 years ago. I was grateful for the love we shared then. It was wonderful. If I would have been satisfied, however, there would be so much growth and love I would have missed out on.
This not only holds true in romantic relationships. It is your health, your friendships, your sense of adventure and your career. Keep a grateful heart and always strive to get better. Between the two of those, your life will be guaranteed to improve in ways you cannot even imagine at this point.
This is a very good secret to an amazing life. That is to catch yourself thinking negatively and toss in some gratitude and appreciation. It will not only dramatically improve the quality of your emotional state, but will change the way you start to view and interact with the world. Does that sound a little bold or over the top? Ask yourself this question. Do you treat people differently when you are feeling angry verses grateful? How about sad verses filled with joy? Even if this difference in treatment is not conscious, if we are being honest, most of us must agree that we do treat people differently based on our emotional state. You have more patience and are more forgiving if you are in a better mood. You are better able to view the positive side of a situation.
Again, we see that gratitude is the antidote to negativity. That is why the more processes to foster gratitude you have in your life, the better. When we are in a negative state, or at the very least going down that path, it can be hard to come up with something we appreciate. That is why doing so ahead of time is so vital. How do we now when ‘ahead of time’ is? We don’t. Our brains can pop up with a negative thought without a warning. That is why we should always be on the lookout for what we can be grateful for. We can do this is so many ways. Find one that works for you. Next, make sure to record those thoughts.
You can start a gratitude journal where you write down daily what you are grateful for. You can have an album of pictures in your phone of people, places and things that you are grateful for. You could even record positive affirmations of what you appreciate on your phone. That way, when negativity shows up, you do not have to think, you have something ready. Here is another secret. This will seem difficult, if not impossible, at first. The more you do it, however, the easier it will become. Before long, you will not only catch your negative thoughts quicker, but they will seem to come less often and they will be outnumbered by grateful thoughts!
I have been waiting to have the time to sit down and write this post. Thank you for stopping in today at Secret2anamazinglife.com. Throughout our over 10 year run, the topic that comes up the most is gratitude. Some of you may even be rolling your eyes at the thought of yet another post about gratitude. The reason we post so much about this subject is that I firmly believe in order to change your life, you have to change your mindset. There is nothing that works with more speed and impact to change your mindset than gratitude.
In my 2 decades of work in the self-improvement field, I have shared this opinion to everyone who would listen. It is what changed my life for the better, and still does. If you use it, I promise it will do the same for you. What most people struggle with is believing that gratitude can do all of this, and how to use it in their own life. They think of people who are constantly preaching the gospel of gratitude as people who go through life ‘wearing rose-colored glasses’. That is not what true gratitude is about at all.
It is not believing that there is no weeds in the garden. Gratitude is realizing that in addition to the weeds, and sometimes in spite of them, wonderful plants and flowers bloom. It is also not just focusing on the plants and pretending there is no weeds. It is working on the weeds while caring for the plants. In case this metaphor is not perfectly clear, we will spell it out. The weeds are the challenges, or what is wrong in life. The plants and flowers represent what is right and good in our world. Just as a garden is rarely, if ever, free of weeds, our life is rarely if ever free of challenges. We must work on overcoming our challenges, while still being grateful for all that is good. You would not give up on a garden because there are a few weeds. You should not give up on life because there are challenges.
Developing an attitude of gratitude is one of the best things you can do for your life. It does not mean that you are denying or ignoring the challenges in life. You are making the bold stand that there is beauty in, and that life is worth while despite the challenges. It is often in the challenges that the true beauty and reasons to be grateful can be found.
It is often when we are down that we fail to appreciate, and sometimes even notice, the little gifts that life provides every day. This can be when we are hurting, when we are exhausted or in my case Monday mornings, when we are tired.
Most of you know already that going from being a DJ to my day job on Monday I get about 2 hours of sleep. It can be tough to look around and appreciate the Miracles of life when you are that tired. It is exactly that which will give us the energy and keep our vibration from slipping lower. Draining us physically, mentally and emotionally.
This past Monday serves as a good example. As I was driving to work, cursing the lack of sleep and energy I was feeling my favorite song came on the radio. Being it is not one of the 10 the are paid to play on repeat all day, in fact it is quite rare, made it stand out. I felt grateful.
It was also a wake up call to remind me to focus on what was working and good in my life instead of what was lacking. After over 20 years of working in self-improvement and with the law of attraction you would think I should know this. As stated earlier, being in a depleted state can make you forget what you know.
The great thing was after that initial noticing, I started to notice other things to appreciate. The great cup of coffee that not only tasted great but would help me wake up. The car that helped me get to work. Even the work I was going to as so many others are looking forwork. Make sure you are always on the lookout for the little Miracles life sends you.
Happy Mother’s Day to all of the mothers out there from us at Secret2anamazinglife.com. We begin, as it should be, with recognition to my mother. You can see both of us in the throw back photo above. Credit goes to her for raising yours truly. As a single parent that couldn’t have been easy. Having a child who would watch the news instead of Sesame Street also couldn’t have been easy. Despite all of this, I learned valuable lessons from my mother.
The skill of resilience. To keep on keeping on, as they say. To keep pushing when others may quit. To do so in a virtuous manner and not cut corners or cheat, even if you have an excuse to do so. The power of kindness and compassion towards others. I still recall all of the great memories we made serving at the local meal program. To turn towards your faith when times get rough. To have that belief that “everything will be OK” as she always says.
Then there is this cute mother, my Margie. She inspires me to be a better man, and loves me even when I fail to do so. She is not only an amazing mother in her own right, she also helped me overcome some of my own childish behavior.
She continues to demonstrate the love and concern she has for her children every day. She works hard to continue to grow and be a good example to them and makes me proud.
How lucky am I to have the influence and to share my life with 2 such amazing mothers? Remember to recognize all of the mothers you see today. The hard work and sacrifice of being a mother can only be paid with love and appreciation.
Such an important message. Mental health is something we all must talk about. It does not matter your political affiliation, your faith, your race or any other nonsense we let divide us. We all can suffer from different aspects of mental health. In reading the Blue Zone books, which are a study on the longest living people in the world and what they have in common, one of the main things was a circle of close friends. Being alone has more health issues associated to it than even smoking. According to their studies. The reason I bring this up is a way I feel we can all help. That is reaching out to those who seem to be lacking a strong social circle.
One of the greatest things you can do to be a great help to mental health is to be a good friend. In fact, that can be one of the best things you can to to help the world in general. Having a good friend to listen to you is one of the greatest blessings. The other side of the coin is that being that friend is also one of the greatest blessings. You want to be rare and significant these days? All you have to do is learn to listen. In a world where everyone is screaming to be heard, being a source that someone can vent to is priceless. Having good friends and being a good friend is some of the most important things we can do to help each other with our mental health.
How true is this statement? If our mental health is not in order, we are far less likely to take care of ourselves physically, financially or any other way. Here are a few other ways in which you can take care of your mental health and help others do the same. This is far from a complete list, so if you would love to share more ideas in the comments below I know all of us would be forever grateful! The more we work together on mental health, the better we will all be.
One of the best ways to help both gain clarity on our thoughts, recognize patterns, and reduce mental clutter and stress can be using a simple journal. Putting our thoughts on paper will help us clear a little space in our heads. It also forces us to sort them out and get a little more clarity on what exactly we are thinking. Even if it doesn’t make sense when we first write it. By reviewing our entries, we can begin to see patterns of thought and action we engage in. It can be self-sabotage, self-doubt, a lack of confidence, or many other defeating trains of thought. It does not have to be all doom and gloom! There is a lot to be learned from both sides of the coin. We can learn the thoughts we have that lead to good days. What we do and think after a victory in life. How we can live in a good emotional state.
That leads us to our next idea – a gratitude journal. None of us experience reality. We actually experience the reality we focus on. What is wrong is always available. So it what is right. Which do we tend to focus on more? By training ourselves (it feels like forcing ourselves at first) to record 3 things we are grateful for and why a day can radically transform our mental health. Done for a length of time, it also subconsciously programs our mind to look for what we have to be grateful in life knowing that we will have to write it down that evening.
I apologize for the length of today’s post and thank you for sticking with me. Mental health is just such an important topic here at Secret2anamazinglife.com. In a world that seems more dividing than ever, there are more opportunities than ever to help each other, and ourselves, in the mental health arena. This can often be more difficult for men as society has frowned upon men not only expressing their mental health but seeking help for it. Luckily that is changing. If we want to improve our mental health, one of the best things we can do is bring joy to others. It is my life mission to leave my world a little better than when I arrived. It is a goal that I can only measure by the day. Each day I strive to add joy and positivity to the lives of all of those I come in contact with. This has given me a life that has my heart bursting with joy and gratitude on most days. On the days my own mental health needs a little help, those relationships become reciprocal.
This month, take time to focus on mental health. If you are really struggling, please reach out to a friend or even a professional for health. You will not only be doing yourself a favor, but allowing them to live a life of service and purpose. That is a big gift. If you want to reach out to us here at Secret2anamazinglife.com with any mental health issue you would like us to take a deeper look at, please do so in the comments below. All of our readers, and their mental health are very important to us.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 