Tag: Gratitude

WHAT A BEAUTIFUL LUNCH!

Almost every day, Margie writes a little note in the lunch she packs for me. It is not only romantic, but helps me keep an attitude of gratitude throughout the work day. It also increases the love that I feel for her with every note I read! This time she decorated an entire bag. Not only do I have a very talented and artistic lady, but she uses her talents to be loving towards me. Now if that would not make me grateful, I do not know what would.

She also found a way to write a little inspiring note on the bag. What did it say? As you can see above, she was thanking me for all I did! Imagine that. She goes through all of the work of decorating the bag, writing a loving note and then thanks me for all that I do! Appreciating your partner is the surest way to receive appreciation from them. Who does not like to feel appreciated? I can promise you all of us do. This added to the love that I felt for my beautiful lady. Alas, there was even more love inside!

Inside she had made me a tasty homemade chicken salad sandwich. Making sure I had enough energy to make it through the day. By the time I even got to taste the food, I was so full of love and appreciation that I already had lots of energy. To many, you could look at this and say that your love packed a lunch and wrote a note. It might make you feel good. If you really stop and think about the time they took to do that, the thought it took to come up with something loving, the care they must of felt for you in order to do all of these things, then it would make you feel extraordinary!!! It should. We must consider everything someone does for us that makes us feel so loved.

\Next time your spouse does something that may even seem simple to you, stop and think of everything it took for them to accomplish. It may not even seem like much to them, but the fact that they did it when they did not have to should tell you all that you know. There are countless things throughout the day that we do for each other. The more we stop and think about it, the more there is to be grateful for. The more we are grateful, the happier we are both with them and with our life. Talk about a win/win situation!

PERFECT WAY TO HAVE A GOOD MORNING

We all start our day in our own way. Some of us it is by drinking a cup of coffee. Some of us check our emails. Some motivated souls even start the day with a little physical fitness. How we start our day goes a long way in determining how our day will go. If, for example, our first thing we do is to pick up our phone and see what social media or the world at large is up to, we leave ourself open to negative influences. Unless that day the world and social media consists of entirely positive news. Perhaps you can see the likelihood of that happening.

What if there was a guaranteed way to start the day with a smile that would not only increase our chances of keeping that smile on our face the whole day long, but increase the bond in many of our relationships too? It is one simple action that can have a powerful influence on both. If you read the photo at the start of this post, you have an idea of what I am talking about. It is the simple act of starting our day expressing gratitude for the amazing people in our life. How do you think your day would start if you picked up the phone, called a friend and said, “I am just calling to tell you how awesome I think you are and how grateful I am to have you in my life. I hope you have a great day.” Do you think that would make it more likely you would have a great day not to mention the friend who received that phone call? Not to mention the strengthening of the bond between the both of you.

Maybe calling people is not your thing. Maybe you start work at 4am like I do. In which case, even a friendly phone call might not be appreciated. We are lucky that we live in a time where there are so many other options. We could send a quick text for them to read to start their day. Opening your phone to a text letting you know how grateful your friend is to have you in their life would be great way to start the day. If you start your day on social media, how much better would it be to pick a random person and leave a comment on their page letting them know how amazing they are and how grateful you are for them? It would be a great start to the day for both of them. How about doing this for a coworker when you get to work? The great thing about all of these examples is that they can become contagious. When you can start a group of people doing this, imagine the possibilities? All of you starting your day expressing gratitude for each other?

Even if you are a rather shy person, this can still work. Picking one of your friends and looking at a picture of them, or even just picturing them in your head. Then list off some of the things that make them the great person you are. Let them know how grateful you are for them. If you do it this way, you might miss the opportunity to brighten someone else’s day, but you still receive the benefits of gratitude. These include, but are not limited to, reduced stress, increased immune function and an overall sense of well-being.

Start your next morning with a dose of gratitude. It will brighten the days of those you care about and make sure you have a much happier day as well.

KEEP THE LITTLE THINGS CLOSE

This is my current setup as I am writing this post for you today. Coffee, a little snack, my trusty but slow computer. You may notice a little note on the keyboard. That is a little note that Margie gave me some time ago. It says “I Love you” with a smiling sun. I keep it in my computer at all times. At this stage in the game, it is several years old. Still, every time I open my keyboard it brings a smile to my face.

That is what I want to talk to you about today. Not that note specifically, but what it represents. To me, this note not only tells me that Margie was loving me at the moment she wrote it, but that she was thinking of me and took time to create a little something that made me smile. In addition, she knows how much I love the sun so she put that on there. It also reminds me when I write that I have a beautiful woman behind me who believes in me no matter what. That often gives me the push I need. All of that from a little piece of paper.

It also reminds me of times like this when Margie was there to write with me. This was even at a coffee shop that now is closed. Lately, we both have been so busy we have not seen a lot of each other. The time we have spent together we are both so tired we cannot fully appreciate each other. There is still that little piece of paper that keeps the smile on my face and has me looking forward to more times like the picture above.

Many times we may appreciate the little things in life in the moment. After a short time they are discarded or put away to rarely be thought of again. In doing so, we are missing a great opportunity to add some love, gratitude and appreciation to our lives. All of this does not have to cost a lot in time or effort. As you can see in my example, all it took was a quick note drawn on a piece of scrap paper. By placing this note in a place where I see it regularly, it is a reminder of those feelings and memories. How about in your life? Is there a small gift or item that can remind you of something, or someone special? Can you put it in a place where you will see it regularly? Maybe your purse, a jacket pocket or by the coffee maker? How could the reminders positively affect your life and your relationships? What is your item and what does it make you think of? I would love to know.

WHAT DOES YOUR HAPPINESS DEPEND ON?

It sure is great if your spouse is happy. If the boss is in a good mood that doesn’t hurt. If the weather is pleasant and traffic flows well that sure makes for a great day! When the people we encounter everywhere and the service we receive all come with a smile.

Let me ask you another question. What are the odds that all of those things will happen in the same day? How many days do you think they can all remain true? The odds do not seem stacked in our favor. If your happiness depends on all, or any, of these holding true, you are likely to find yourself a little short on happy days.

The ironic thing is people spend most of their energy trying to control, it worse complaining about, things beyond their control. What good does that do? It leaves us feeling both exhausted and frustrated. That also does not put a smile on our face.

Instead, we should focus on developing inner processes that bring us joy. Developing an attitude of gratitude would be a great start. Look around you for all of the things in your life that are going great. That does not mean being blind to the challenges. It means realizing even in the darkest of times we have plenty of things going right!

Ask yourself today, does your happiness depend on outside circumstances? If so, today would be a great day to take back control of your emotions. Let me know what makes a happy day for you!

WHEREVER I MAY ROAM

Take a look around you. Wherever you happen to be reading this. It could be while getting your morning coffee. It could be in break at work or right before you go to bed. Feel free to share when you usually read this website.

Even if you happen to be reading this while waiting for the dentist, this holds true. If you look around there will be something you are grateful for. It could be that morning coffee you are making. It could be the coworker you get along with. If it is at night, your soft pillow is something worth gratitude. Even at the dentist, you could be grateful for the exit door!

I would recommend doing this several times a day. It not only increases gratitude, but gives a feeling of peace and tranquility in a often hectic world. I would love to hear both what time of day you read this site as well as what you are grateful for around you right now!

PERCEPTION CREATES REALITY

To many of you this may sound cliche or, at the very least, like some positive thinking nonsense. I do suppose it could be a little of both. That does not make it any less true. Much like anything in life, familiarity breeds contempt. Almost nobody I know enjoys going to work. If they lost their job, however, they would be happy to have an opportunity to earn money. Once back at a job, how long before they start to grumble about ‘having to get up early’? I am guilty of this myself.

My lovely lady is one of the most vocal critics of going to the gym. I think she spends so much time dreading it she might burn more calories doing that than working out. She did put this whole thing in great perspective the other day. After some introspection and contemplation, she looked at me and said, “I hate going to the gym, but I love how I feel when I leave.” Meaning going through all the sweating, moving your body when you do not want to and sore muscles are not enjoyable. Leaving knowing that you put in the effort and are one step closer to a healthier you is a great feeling. Wisely, she focuses on the future to be able to propel her to take productive action. It is a way to trick overcome her brain’s desire for inaction.

Speaking of working out. Recently, I sustained an injury that will prevent me from doing some things that I both enjoy and need to do. Now that I cannot do them, guess who is motivated to do them? Of course after the surgery I am going to be so motivated to go back to doing these exercises, right? That may be true in the short term, but after a few days of soreness from starting over, I will probably go back to dreading them. How do we change this to a constant state of motivation to do the things we know we need to do?

Many people ask how to stay motivated to take the actions they need to. I have written several books on the subject myself. It is the wrong question to be asking. Yes, it is good to have more motivation. Yes, it is good to find new and different ways to be motivated. Even with all of that, we will never be motivated all of the time. Not to mention, for most of us, motivation is a depreciating asset. As discussed in the earlier examples, you can be motivated at the start, but as time goes on that motivation becomes more difficult to maintain. What we need is a change in perception.

Inky Johnson, one of my favorite speakers, says that perception drives performance every day of the week. He emphasizes how important why we do what we do is. I couldn’t agree more. If you are working just for yourself, that is one kind of motivation. If you have a spouse and family depending on you, that is an entirely different kind of motivation. There is a difference between someone who works hard and a hard worker. Someone who works hard will do so if the boss is watching or the pay is right. Someone who is a hard worker will work hard because that is their character. That is the promise they made to themselves. How about you? What is your perception on doing the difficult things in life?

LOVE THROUGH A CORN DOG?

Last week, I had posted about being on vacation and attending our wonderful state fair. The Wisconsin State Fair brought many fun memories again this year. Great bands, great shows, wonderful food, but most importantly, time with family and friends.

I was lucky enough to have a few days with my lovely lady. We always get a coupon book that makes the whole experience a lot more affordable. One of the foods she enjoys eating during the fair is a corn dog. We were going to grab one a few times, but usually ended up too full by the time we got to the stand.

One day while I was wondering around by myself and missing her, I reached in my pocket and pulled out this corn dog coupon we were going to use. It made me think of how lucky I was to have such a wonderful partner to share things like the state fair with.

In life, there are reminders all around us of the special people in our lives. Reminders of things we should be grateful for. We often dismiss them as everyday objects. Perhaps they mean more to us after a person has passed away.

One of the secrets to an amazing life is to call your attention to these items while they are present. Spend some time pondering what they represent and the people you care about. It will increase the amount of love and gratitude in your life. That, in turn, will make your life more amazing!

GUESS WHAT TODAY IS?!

I guess the picture gives away the answer to the question the title purposes. Yes, today is my birthday. To me, the day was never that big of a deal. It was great that I was born to be part of this world, but beyond that everyday is a gift for me. This all changed, however, when I met the lovely lady I am with now. Margie has a way of making everything a grand celebration. I think that is one of the major keys to an amazing life – finding someone who enjoys celebrating you and being with you. I have certainly found that in my lovely lady.

Having special people in your life, romantic or not, to celebrate with makes life so much more enjoyable. The best way to create relationships like this is how we treat others. The better we treat others, the more likely they are to celebrate with you. Celebrating the accomplishments, and special occasions, of your friends and family increases bonds and joy between you. It is also more likely to make that celebration more reciprocal. Take an interest in the people in your life and note the dates that are important to them. When those dates arrive, take time to celebrate them.

Here is another thought, it does not have to be the usual important dates. You do not have to wait for a birthday or graduation. You can pick fun days that are important to you, or maybe even just fun, and celebrate them together. As I write this, it is the National Day of the Cowboy. I had no idea such a holiday existed. Again, Margie to the rescue. She bought me a calendar that lists the holiday on each day. If I knew someone into cowboys, today would be a great day to get together and have a good time with them. It is crazy, fun things like this that make life worth living. What gives life its flavor. You could even have a party celebrating the birth of your favorite author?

One of the greatest gifts that I have is when I can engage with the readers of this blog. If you would like to give me a gift today, feel free to leave your feedback, make a suggestion as to what topics you would like us to discuss or just say ‘hello’ and let us know where you are reading this. I hope you all have a great day today. I know thanks to the beautiful woman in my life, I will!

LISTEN TO THE POETS

In today’s crazy world it can be very difficult to not hear from a politician! We have some politicians that seem to be more focused on being on television than doing the job they were elected to do. Alas, it is the world we live in.

The point is that listening to these folks can leave you quite dispirited. We must, at the very least, balance this with some entertaining and inspiring listening. I’m not exactly a poet, although I have written a few poems, but having a few to listen to can pay some good dividends.

News, and politicians, have a chicken little the sky is falling outlook on life. To read and listen to people who ponder the beauty of nature and life itself can be a welcome, if not needed, break. I would encourage everyone to write some poems themselves. You don’t have to show them to anyone or try to get them published. The mere fact of writing them can bring some inner peace.

What are your some of your favorite fun things to listen to? Do you have recreational entertainment? For mental health and well-being it is vital!

DO NOT LET THE FUTURE DISTURB YOU

The future. It can be a scary prospect. It can be a difficult project you have coming up. Maybe you have a presentation to give at work you are nervous about? There are difficult conversations we must have. To the basic Monday morning dread some of us feel.

There are 2 ways of looking at this dread, in my opinion. The first is that the future will come whether we want it to our not. No amount of dread or feeling nervous will change that. In fact, the more we get worked up about it, the more we are extending the pain of the event. It will still come, and may very well be difficult. Why add to that by sacrificing the time leading up to it?

The second, and perhaps more productive, way of looking at this is to use it as motivation. If you are nervous to give a talk at work, use that energy to be as prepared as possible. Monday morning dread? Use that feeling to find ways to bring as much joy as your can to your morning. That could involve buying a special coffee to enjoy on the way to work to five minutes of gratitude focus first thing in the morning.

As Marcus Aurelius said above, we will meet the future with the same weapons of reason we have today. If that thought is not reassuring, then work to improve your weapons of reason. Otherwise, do your best to relax and enjoy and be grateful for the present.