Today is an event that happens but once a year. I run a 5k. Let it be known that in no way am I a runner. Yes, I do go to the gym 3 days a week, but I look far more like the second picture than the first. My goal is always to run the 3.2 miles in less than 30 minutes. Depending on your fitness level, this could seem like nothing or an impossibility. With my asthma and over indulgence in pizza, it is at the edge of my ability. What it does do is give me a goal to push towards. I have yet to achieve it, but always try.
Here is the great thing about having this goal, and even about not achieving it. Forever am I realizing there are ways in which I can improve. Eat better, train better and find ways to improve my breathing. Still, pushing yourself can have such amazing benefits. I encourage all of us to try this. It does not have to even be something physical. It can be pushing ourselves to write 1000 words a day towards our new book. It can be forcing ourselves to clean for 30 minutes a day. Maybe reading a couple of pages every night.
Whatever seems at the edge of our ability to do, we should try to do that. It is the only way to expand and improve our life. If we constantly stay in our comfort zone, our life will not only fail to expand, but we will also never feel the pride that comes with accomplishing something we never thought we could.
This is a new quote to me, but what a great thought. If you never push yourself, you may never see what is holding you back. Not exactly sure what the percentage is, but I would wager the situations in which you, and your thoughts, are your strongest chains is above 90%. There are many times that I am looking to do something I have never done before and the reasons are often clouded over in my mind. This is why it is so important to surround yourself with people who will help improve your life, as we noted last post.
In my life, there have been many examples of chains that I have let hold me back. We all have them. What often surprises me is how often these chains exist in my own mind and manifest themselves as something else. I consider myself a fairly introspective individual, but we all tell ourselves little white lies to stay in our comfort zones. This is what our brains are hard-wired to do. Your mind does not want you to risk doing something that would be uncomfortable, even if it would further your life. We may believe the obstacle is outside of us, when it is really our beliefs that are keeping us from moving forward.
Let me give you 2 quick examples in my own life. I was preparing to do my first ever book signing. I was nervous as it was my first book, not to mention first book signing. It was in the sunny village of Greendale. I was going to put up flyers in some of the shops to promote it. I figured there were 2 or 3 businesses that would let me do that. With me I had this attractive lady I just started dating. She informed me that we were not going to the shops that I was sure would let me put up the signs, but we were going to ask in all of them. Informing her that is not how this small village worked, she informed me that I was just being too nervous to do so. She even promised to go in and ask for me to prove that more places would hang up one of my signs than I expected. Little did I know at the time this would consist of her getting the attention of an employee, shoving me forward and exclaiming, “This man has something to ask you.” As it turned out, all but 2 of the businesses, whom I should note are no longer in business, agreed to put one of my flyers in their windows. Proving it was my fear and not the businesses that prevented the promotion.
Another example is when I was going to start my podcast (Living the Dream with Neil Panosian) which you can find on all of your streaming platforms. Every time that I had coffee with my good friend Nick, I would tell him how I was going to start this podcast. He informed me that I had been telling him this for six months. I explained how I did not have the equipment, know exactly how to go about starting one or promote one. He countered that one is able to learn all of these things on this wonderful thing we have called the internet. Great things about friends, they call you on your B.S. when you are full of it, as Michael Franti says. Again, an assist to Margie who reminded me how right Nick was.
In our lives, it is often when we push outside our comfort zones that we realize there are chains holding us back. It can take some introspection to discover what they truly are. It may also take some hard truth from a close friend. We must keep our minds open and be honest with ourselves if we hope to free ourselves from our chains. What are some of your chains holding you back and how can you free yourself from them?
We have been advocating staying present on this site so much lately it runs the risk of becoming too familiar. Before you are tempted to dismiss this as just another post about living in the moment, I encourage you to read on. In sales, they tell you to speak about the benefits of a product before the features or the price. In other words, you paint a picture of how life will be better for your prospect before you tell them what they are getting. That is what we are doing with today’s post.
Have you ever had a day where despite challenges, you still seem to be feeling amazing and able to make it through the day with a smile? I am sure most of us have had a day like that. We have also had the opposite. Where even if things seem to be turning out well, we still don’t feel the amount of joy we should. How many of us stop and ask ourselves why this happens? Figuring out the question to this will help make our lives infinitely more full of joy, but how many of us actually do this? When we feel sick to our stomach we will spend the rest of the day analyzing what we ate to the smallest ingredient. Should we not to the same to what brings us joy?
It can be impossible to note every single detail that is occurring in our lives on the days we feel amazing. Not to mention, that would probably take a good deal of joy out of it. Instead, I will ask you to pay attention to just one detail – who you are around. They say you are the total of the 5 people you spend the most time with. If your life is not filled with as much joy as it could be, this might be a good spot to investigate. That is not saying it excuses our own behavior, but surrounding yourself with good people who appreciate your worth will make all of the difference.
This week, take a moment to notice how the people around you have you feeling. Are there people who just put a smile on your face being around them? There are people in my life that can have me smiling just thinking about them. That is why my screensaver is my lovely lady. Just thinking about her can bring a smile on my face. How about you? Who are the people in your life who make your life amazing just by being in it?
This post is coming out on a Sunday. By this evening many of us will begin to stress about things that really do not matter. It would serve us well to take a hard look at the list above and realize that life is a lot better than we realize. Most of us have most, if not all, of the things on that list. They may seem trivial, or be taken for granted, but imagine doing without them. Each one is a huge blessing.
In a time when the world is facing war and genocide, many would give anything to have this complete list. Most of what we stress about is really not that pressing. Money can be made and lost. Jobs can come and go. The things that really matter are important to recognize and be grateful for. Do this and your week will be off to a wonderful start.
It never fails to surprise me how many people understand how important it is for a child to be surrounded by positive, nurturing people, but fail to see that it is equally important for adults as well. As we continue to make our way through this journey called ‘life’, stresses continue to mount and our responsibilities continue to grow. It seems more challenging to make friends as adults. That is why it is so critical that we surround ourselves with a healthy circle of quality people.
As adults, we also need to learn the skill of leaning on our village of friends. Asking for help is viewed by many as a weakness. It is no more of a weakness to ask help from a friend in dealing with a stressful situation than it is to ask a mechanic for help with an automotive issue. It is equally important to be a village for others who may be struggling too. Be a good fried. Listen to hear and understand, not just reply. One of the best things to do is to get together regularly with friends to share and enjoy each other’s company. The world does get busy, but this is one activity we cannot go without.
Start building your village today. Already have one? Remember to spend a little more quality time in it. Share moments with friends. Be that village for someone else as well. Schedule regular days of fun with friends. It will save your sanity and just might save your life.
Look at how happy this kid is looking at this duck. He is taking it all in. You might be thinking to yourself, “Oh, to be a kid again. ” You would be on to something. How long has it been since you looked at something with childlike wonder?
Today, spend at least a few moments looking at something as if it were the first time. Notice,without judgment, all of the little details. Soak it all in. Don’t get lost in your own head with all of the worries and thoughts that seem to plague our waking hours. Just purely enjoy the moment.
I find this can work really well with people too. Looking at someone you care about asif it were the first time can remind you of many of the wonderful things we often take for granted. I would love to hear about your experience in the comments below.
My favorite day of the year, the first day of summer. It is the longest amount of daylight. It is a season of growth and sunshine. It just feels as if happinessblossoms on every corner. Where I live, this season is far too brief for my liking. So today, I do my best to make the most of everything.
To me, the best way to celebrate summer is by focusing on the things you find fun in your life. What makes the sun shine in your spirit? Do more of that today! Have an ice-cold glass of lemonade and a scoop of ice cream. Share a smile with someone you love.
Last post, we looked at how environment and ritual can give us a grateful life. We can use those two tools to transform any area of our life we want to focus on. This will be expanded on when my fourth book comes out this fall. So you do not have to wait until then to start creating the life of your dreams, we are going to look at using these two tools on the most important area of our life, ourrelationships.
If you think about it, the quality of our life is the quality of our relationships. If you have all the wealth and fame in the world but no romantic partner or friends to share it with, your life is going to suck. If you are suffering in poverty and insecurity and you have no partner or friends to help you through, your life will really resemble a flaming dumpster.
Enough of the negativity. Let’s look at what having amazing relationships can do for us. Have you ever received some great news and had to wait to share it with someone special? It feels like you could explode! Why? It is not like the situation will change when you share the news. How about watching sports? Does it feel any different to be sitting at home alone watching the game versus seeing it livewith a friend and thousands of other screaming fans? Why is that? Because as human beings, we are wired for connection.
Connection not only amplifies our joy, it halves our sorrow. Have you ever had a tough day at work (silly question) and came home to the embrace of a loved one? How about a stressful family situation and then went out for fun with some friends? Suddenly, the stress is a little less. This is not only good for us physically but will help us address the situation better.
How can we use environment and ritual to improve our relationships? How about scheduling a regular coffee date with that special friend? Maybe cooking a special meal for the one you love? Another great ritual could be sending out a greeting card once a month. Just a card reminding people how amazing they are and how much they mean to you. Do this once a week, and in a year, you will have improved 52 relationships! (Side note our address here at secret2anamazinglife is P.O. Box 333 Oak Creek WI 53154 USA) Not into the whole greeting card thing? Try sending a well-crafted email or post on someone’s social media page.
Environment can be used much the same way. In my first two books, I advocate using a ‘Happy Playlist’ of songs to lift your spirit. You can use the same method to put together a playlist that reminds you of a special friend or the one you love. Can you imagine how you would greet your partner if you listened to a playlist of songs that reminded you of them the whole way home? How about displaying little things that remind you of all the amazing people in your life? Maybe things they gave you, or just something that reminds you of them. Every time you see that object, that special person in your life comes to mind. Every time they come to mind, your appreciation for them grows.
These are only some ways that you can use environment and ritual to create the relationships of your dreams. How would you use the two tools of self-improvement to positively impact your relationships? Share your ideas in the comments below.
This will be a very powerful post! Today we will learn 2 items that can transform any area of our life. Problems with your health? This can help. Relationship losing its spark? This will fan the flames of desire. The best part is, once you put these two things in place, the change is almost automatic! As a bonus, the more you do it, the easier it becomes.
You may be thinking this all sounds too good to be true, and I would not blame you. Let’s dive right into the first tool you can use, and I think you will grasp the power of this.Remember, the best way to witness the effect these strategies for success will have in your life is to use them yourself.
The first tool is the environment. We discussed this a few posts back, but let us take a closer look. Many people are chasing that better life. Chasing that perfect relationship. Chasing that great career or healthy lifestyle. Many of these same people are in environments that do not serve those ends. You are looking for a healthy lifestyle, but your refrigerator is full of ice cream and cake. You want to turn that side hustle into a dream career, but your bedroom is full of gaming gear and other distractions.
Reaching goals can be tough enough. Creating an environment where those goals can flourish makes it so much easier. Want a great relationship? Fill your bookshelf with books on the subject. Watch some great videos on YouTube or a relationship podcast. Fill your cabinets with tasty and healthy snacks, so those are your only options.
The second tool to transform your life is ritual. Before you recoil in shock and terror, I am not saying you have to dance in the moonlight with your friends or whatever is happening in that picture above. A ritual is nothing more than an intentional habit. An act we purposely engage in for a desired outcome.Whether that outcome is health,wealth, or my favorite, gratitude, you can develop a ritual.
Let us use gratitude as an example. I think we could all use more gratitude in our lives. It not only helps us feel good, it changes our perception on life.When we are focused on what we lack we feel poor and like life is a sentence of sorts. Our life feels like a job. Have your you ever felt that way? Than you could use more gratitude.
Here is how we can use ritual and environment to stay in the mindset of gratitude. Let us start by finding our favorite quote on gratitude. Now print out 3 copies. Place one where you will see it first thing in the morning. This could be the bathroom mirror, the coffee maker, the refrigerator door. Whatever works for you. Place one in your car for your commute. Lastly, keep one in your pocket. You now have surrounded yourself with reminders of gratitude. You have the environment.
Now comes the ritual. Every morning, say the quote out loud 3 times. Thus reminding yourself to be grateful that day. Whenever you reach in your pocket for keys, a pen, or anything else, take your quote out and read it. At the end of the day, write three things your grateful for that day and why in a journal. You could keep this by your bed. This would add to the environment.
Can you imagine how much easier living a grateful life would be using these secrets? I would love to hear your tips for living grateful in the comments below. Come back next post where we look at ideas to use this to create the relationship of your dreams!
As we start a new week, let us do our best to keep a smile on our faces. This can seem challenging depending on what life throws our way. Here is something that will help – focusing on our blessings. That is everything we have to be grateful for on our lives. Can you imagine how different your life would be if you were so focused on gratitude that you had to be interrupted to be affected by negativity? How would your life be different if being grateful was the rule and not the exception?
This sounds great, but how can this really be possible? How can we remain grateful in a world that is often ‘positive challenged’? In a word – reminder. Put as many things in front of you to remind you not only of the things you already have to be grateful for but to discover new ones as well.
This will be different for everyone, as everyone has different things to be grateful for. You could keep a picture of a loved one in the car to look at during the commute to and from work. This could be one of the 2 or 4 legged varieties.You could keep a gratitude journal on your nightstand by your bed.Maybe a well-placedaffirmation on the bathroom mirror or coffee machine?
These are just a few ideas. Choose what works for you. Next post, we will look at 2 steps to take that will not only work for gratitude, but for any area of your life. You will definitely want to return for that. Better yet, subscribe to this blog so you do not miss a single post. Feel free to share what you do to stay in gratitude in the comments below.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 