I DON’T THROW STONES AT DOGS 🐕

For those of you who know me personally, the title of this post should not be much of a surprise. On any given day, I would rather speak with a dog than some people I know. If you read into the quote, it also fits the author. In this case the dogs that bark are people and situations that cause a distraction. When you are working on transforming your life to one you not only can be proud of, but one you will enjoy living every day, you cannot stop and worry about what Jane said about Susan. You can’t even really worry about the gossip that Jane or Susan may be saying about you.

In 23 years of bartending, and now several years being a DJ, I have noticed there are plenty of people who could fit in the category of barking dogs. If I did stop and worry about all of the people who wish to be detractors, I would have a lot less energy and time to work on improving myself and my life. Add to that, the input I receive from the over 200 countries this website is followed in, and there are countless people with something to say. This is not to say you should not listen to feedback. To me, engaging with people around the globe is one of the best parts about being international. What we should not fall victim to is the ‘keyboard rangers’, as Greg Plitt used to refer to them. Those are the sad souls who spend their lives criticizing from behind a computer screen. These folks are generally not putting in time to improve their own lives and are more focused on tearing down others. Do you think people like Warren Buffett and Jeff Bezos sit down and respond to every negative comment about them? No. They are busy running their respective companies.

Next time you are tempted to respond to ideal gossip or some ‘keyboard ranger’, ask yourself, “Will spending time on this bring me any closer to my goal? By doing so, will it take precious time away from improving my life and my position in it?” There are a lot of people who feel they need to respond to everything that is said and done. Is that not letting your emotions control you? I know there are people who slander you and continue to say negative things. I know you would like to get back at them and get some feeling of revenge. Trust me, it is not worth it and gives them even more power over you. Still don’t trust me on this point? That is fine. I will leave you with the wise words of the singer Frank Sinatra.

IMPORTANT THOUGHT AFTER THE ELECTION 🗳🤔

Here in the United States, people are reacting to the results of the recent elections. Some are rejoicing. Some are quite upset. Some are worried. Some races have yet to be decided. As I mentioned on my post the day of the election, we should focus on uniting despite our differences. Now that elections are over, the focus should be on how to work together to come up with solutions that make a better life for all of us. It can be hard to understand and appreciate those who have a different thought or opinion than we do. I am hoping this picture above helps. Which gent do you think is right? If you look at the picture, you would be inclined to say, “Both of them.” How can that be? How can they both be right?

In the picture it is easy to see that the situation is correct for both gents because it looks different based on their perspective. Hmmm…something to think about. This is easy to see and appreciate in this visual example. The same holds true for spiritual, social and philosophical examples as well. If you were raised in a household that never had to worry about money, you would look at situations and life far differently than someone raised in a poor family. If you were raised in a Christian household, you may have a certain set of values. Those would differ in many ways than if you were raised in a Muslim household. Even a Christian household in say… Peru, would be different than one in Greenland.

Yet, knowing that situations could not possibly be the same, we spend the majority of time and effort trying to convince others that our way and opinion is the right one. Can you see how foolish this is now? Instead we should say, “This person has an opinion and way of doing things that is different than mine. How can we both respect our differences and work together to come up with a solution for the problems we are facing?” When I mention things like this, people tell me that will never happen. They say it is too much of a fantasy. They call me an idealist and say these thoughts are radical. I feel quite the contrary. To me, they are the most logical and productive course of action. Why is being able to respect our differences while working together seem so untenable? It would be the logical course of action if we hope to promote peace and further progress.

My guess why people find this hard to believe and even harder to picture being put in place is because it involves being able to control your emotions. To most people, the thought that we can control our emotions instead of letting them control us, is as foreign as speaking a different language. That does not make it any less true. I implore you to not only picture this way of relating to one another, but to work towards it. Elections have a way of either bringing us together or tearing us apart. Once again, it is important to realise that decision is solely in the hands of the people. Not the media reporting it. Not the political leaders who appear to be running the show. Not the winners. Not the losers. The power to decide if we are going to work against one another or to work with one another is entirely up to us the voters. Stay united and learn to work with each other. In the world, in your community and in your neighborhood.

YOU NEED TO SHARE IT!

This past Saturday I took part in an event that featured several different authors. Above is a picture of me talking to one of them. These events are always fun and enlightening. Talking with other authors, we all discover we share some of the same struggles and can support one another. At this particular event, another great aspect of the benefits of writing was on display – sharing your story. There are not words strong enough to convey my desire to have everyone share their story. It is such a gift in so many ways. We have discussed a few of them in past posts and I will provide a quick reminder here. It helps those that read it know and feel they are not alone. No matter how uniquely crazy your situation feels, I can guarantee there is someone out there going through something very similar if not the same. It also helps share and provide a record of mistakes you may have made and helps others avoid them. If it is too late for that, it may help them see how you made your way out of it. Sharing your story helps to foster a sense of community in whatever group you are writing about. With technology, that community can even be global!

Those benefits, as great as they are, do not come close to completing the list of benefits you can get from sharing your story. Here is what I heard at this event. There was an author who lost her husband suddenly and unexpectedly. She was left with 3 children to raise and a host of challenges. One of which was just managing to go on after losing the person she loved most in the world. How do you manage to love your life after a moment like that? She managed to do it and shared how she did it in her book. Another author lost her child. That is devastating to any parent. In addition to having to heal from her own pain, she had to explain what happened to her other children. How can you possibly do both of those? She did and she wrote a book that will help other parents who may tragically find themselves in the same situation. A third author has 3 autistic children. One who also has hearing and vision challenges. While doing her best to raise them, she is often judged harshly by those around her who are ignorant to her struggles. One time even having the police called on her. How does she manage to stay sane and raise her children? What struggles does a parent in that situation go through? She is going to write a book about that.

In this case, writing was a great form of therapy for all of these authors. It helped them heal and by sharing their journey, it will help others do the same. We may be fortunate enough not to have events like these occur in our life. I can promise you we have all faced some struggle. Job loss, relationship loss or a host of other challenges. Sharing our story and our journey with others is both a gift to them and to us. When we share our story with the world, it is the world that benefits. Unless you are some sort of extraterrestrial, which would make a great book, that world includes you! When we share, everyone, including ourselves, wins.

What if you are not a writer? That is fine. Everyone is not a reader. You can share your story through music, painting, sculpting or whatever medium you decide. Today, you can make your own videos to share on a variety of platforms. You could start a blog. You can start your own podcast and talk to people that way. These are all great because people consume in different ways. Some people listen to podcasts. Some of us read blogs. Some of us watch videos. Some of us still read books. Some of us do several or all of these. That is why it is so important to share your story in whatever form makes you comfortable.

Share your story. When you do we all win.

DON’T FALL FOR IT!🗳

Here in the United States, today is election day. For anyone who lives here, this is not a news flash. You are reminded of it anytime you pick up a newspaper, go online, look at your phone, watch television or listen to the radio. If you go home to escape the chaos, there are more reminders in your mailbox. It is not simply a reminder of the need to go vote. It is not even telling you why you should vote for a certain person and how wonderful they are. No, 95% of these ads are negative. The percentage is probably higher, but we will go with 95%. That means out of 100 political ads you see, (This can feel like it happens in one day), 95 of them will be negative. It is not just that this person would be a poor choice. Oh no, this person who is running against the candidate they want you to vote for is an evil human being. They will come at night and steal your cat. They will put salt in your Starbucks coffee. Once they win they will start the whole world ablaze just to amuse themselves. This may sound ridiculous, but it is not far from what is being put out there. Quite often, they never even mention why their candidate is a good choice, if they even mention them at all. This, ladies and gentleman, is called getting you to vote in fear.

We must ask ourselves, “What is the motive behind all of these political and personal attacks?” Who stands to gain what by having us live in fear and in anger? The million dollar question to ask yourself is this – “Who stands to gain the most by having us so divided we live in fear and hatred of each other?” Do you think it is really neighbor Bob who voted for a different party than you did? I can promise you that neighbor Bob is probably thinking the same thing of you. Here is the truth, it is neither of you. By having groups of people divided against themselves, they are often too busy to notice what is happening behind the scenes. I am not saying that you should avoid voting. Quite the contrary. I believe you can’t complain about the game unless you play. Here is what I am saying. Respect those who vote and think different of you. Watch those in office, even those you vote for. Make sure they are doing what they promised. Communicate with your neighbor. You do not have to agree with them, but you can still respect them. That is what all of these political ads want you to forget. They want to brainwash you into thinking anyone who thinks different, or who may vote different is evil.

I ask you on election day, as I do on every day, do not let other’s agendas divide us. You can disagree with someone and still respect them. If you cannot, the problem lies with you and not with them. Stay united my friends. That is where our power is.

KEEP SWINGING!💪

Baby Ruth had the record for most home runs for a while. Many people know that. He also struck out quite a bit. How many people know that? He did not let it stop him, do you let it stop you? If you strike out in life, or have a failure in life, we need to keep swinging. We always have another “at bat” or chance to do better.

If athletes in sports make a mistake, they are told to put it behind them. We must do the same. If we always show up, and never give up, we will be tough to beat. Take Babe Ruth’s advice and keep swinging +

GO THERE NOW!🌴🏝🦩

Above is a partial list of countries who viewed my blog yesterday. Circled, you will see one of the countries I long to visit. That is the Seychelles. Any relaxing tropical local works for me. It does my heart good to see those in such locations are enjoying my writing. Perhaps a book signing could be in the future?

Traveling to tropical destinations is something I do not get to do as often as I would like. The above picture, which graces the back of my second book, was taken in Runaway Bay Jamaica. Margie and I certainly enjoyed our time there.

If you can’t runaway to the islands like some rockstar or internet model, what is the next best thing? I have two suggestions. First, enjoy what is close to home. The above picture I took on a walk through the park with my mother. Getting out in nature brings peace to the soul.

What happens when the snow comes and the temperatures drop? Here comes my next suggestion. Go there in your mind! Take a little mental vacation. There are plenty of fun, free videos on YouTube. I even have one of those VR headsets that make you feel like you’re there. Grab some vacation brochures. Check out their websites! Take a little mental vacation. It will help recharge your mind and your spirit.

DON’T FORGET TO UNPLUG THIS ON THE WEEKEND!

It is true that unplugging things saves electricity and energy. When we do save energy, we have more to use at a later time. Whether that is in our homes or our bodies. Make sure to unplug a little this weekend.

You may be busy like myself and not have a lot of free time on the weekend. The key then is to make the most of the time you have. Truly unplug. This could be meditation. It could be sitting in nature and reading a book. Taking a hot bath. Whatever works for you, make sure to do it this weekend.

YOU CAN DO IT TOO!😃

Not long ago I posted how I was the most unlikely candidate to be a multi-book author. Passed English by the skin of my teeth. Bartended for 23 years. Worked at the Post Office for 25 years and counting. Yet, here I am! Three books published and more on the way. Why? Because I was passionate to share what I have learned.

This Saturday, I’ll be a part of an event featuring many great authors. The place it is at has even been promoting me. This all seems like a dream, but it couldn’t be more true. When you combine your passion with a desire to use it to serve others, great things will happen.

Whatever your passion may be, think of a way in which you can use it to serve the world. Soon you will find that the universe is moving to help you. If you are in the neighborhood this Saturday, stop by to say hello. If you can’t make it, feel free to click the link below to check out all of my books and blog!

CLICK HERE TO SEE ALL MY BOOKS AND MY DAILY INSPIRATIONAL BLOG😀

CHANGE THE WAY YOU SPEAK?🤔

What phrases do you use that could be subconsciously sabotaging you? We all have that one phrase we picked up somewhere. Maybe from our parents? Maybe in school? Maybe on the job? It can be something like “Money doesn’t grow on trees.” Or even a simple “I can’t afford it.” The issue doesn’t have to be lack of abundance. It could be a phrase about things always going wrong. It can be something about how everyone is Only out for themselves.

I hear people tell me all of the time, “Neil those are just something people say. I don’t pay it any mind.” Actually, you do pay it some mind – subconscious mind! That portion of your brain is always listening. If you are repeating something negative over and over, it is bound to affect you. That is why affirmations work. Try to start using a phrase that will add something positive to your life.

When people ask me how I’m doing, I always answer “Living the Dream!” Not only do I say that, I truly believe I am. So much so, it is the title of my second book. What positive phrase could you add to your life? Leave it in the comments below.