THE SECRET TO TURNING IT ALL AROUND

As this week begins, you may find yourself asking, “Where do I begin?” Sometimes we can feel so far down we can’t see a way out. If you haven’t been there yet, consider yourself quite fortunate. Personally, I have found myself there several times.

Whether it is thr loss of a job, loss of a relationship or loss of a loved one, life can throw us under the bus when we least expect it. We can feel like we don’t even want to get out of bed.

Even when things are not quite that bad but we are just frustrated with how our life is at the moment, what to do next can be confusing. What is the first basic step? Is there a universal action that can work for everyone in all situations?

The great news? There is such an action and I can tell you it has worked in my own life. That action is GRATITUDE. Focusing on what you have to be grateful for will change your life quicker than anything else.

There are many great books and ideas to help foster this ‘attitude of gratitude’. In my own book “A Happy Life for Busy People” I lost several fun activities that can help make gratitude a daily part of your life. If you are interested in getting your own copy, there will be a link at the end of this post.

Whether you use my book or any other method, begin to use gratitude today, and watch your life transition immediately!

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THE NEIL STARTER PACK



People often ask me, “Neil, what is your secret to remaining positive and limiting the negative effect stress has in your life?” It was with this question in mind that I pondered what material I would recommend that would allow individuals to make the most of their lives. My first recommendation would be to get your hands on my book “A Happy Life for Busy People” You will find a link at the end of this post. It includes everything I have learned in 20+ years in the self-improvement field. Written in a conversational tone, it is like spending time with me everytime you turn the page.
Next, the recording “The Strangest Secret” by Earl Nightingale. This 30 minute recording is nothing short of life-changing. In this recording you will learn valuable things about how your mind works as well as a plan you can easily put into place to fast track your success. I have personally listened to this recording over 100 times and it brings something new each and every time.
Third, would be the movie “The Secret” released in 2006. This movie is a basic foundation of the law of attraction. There are very important concepts highlighted in this movie. You will learn a lot and all you have to do is push play.
Lastly, would be my favorite book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie. This is a book I do my best to read once a year. Depending on where I am in life, this books serves as a learning tool or a great reminder. Everything we do and accomplish in life involves people. The better your ability to get along with others, the better your chances of success. I can think of no better book than this to teach you the tools to do just that.

With these four resources, you will be well on your way to an amazing life. Click the link below to get your copy of my book and begin your journey!

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30 DAYS OF GRATITUDE(DAY #22)

Welcome back to our celebration of 30 days of gratitude. Each day we will focus on one area of our life to be grateful for. If this is your first day doing this I invite you to go back and do the days before this. You can do them in your head, write them down and home, but it is my hope you decide to share what you are grateful for with our community here on Secret2anamazinglife.com. There are no rules. Do one day or do all 30. Let us now look at today’s area of gratitude.

Just like the last post about songs, stories in my life are plentiful. I have two full bookshelves in my office and some books that won’t even fit. As both an author and someone committed to improving themselves, I have a passion for reading. My favorite book is How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. it is a book you can read several times as always get something new out of it. I love the works of Tom Brown Jr. The books that comprise The Secret collection by Rhonda Byrne are most amazing.

Stories can be found in more that just books. I also have a collection of audio material that I can learn from. As most of you know, I am a big fan of Earl Nightingale. His stories that can be found on such great works as The Strangest Secret and Lead the Field, are timeless classics.

All of these stories are great, but some of best stories are those among friends that bring a laugh to our faces and joy to our hearts. I recall a great party at my late friend Nick’s house one day during my high school years that spawned years of great stories and friendships. Margie and I have some great stories from our trips to Las Vegas and Jamaica. We are always looking to create and share new stories with each other as well.

What stories are you grateful for? We all tend to enjoy stories that remind us of the good in the world and each other. It would be great if we could share more of them with each other in the new year. 

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30 DAYS OF GRATITUDE (DAY #20)

Welcome back to our celebration of 30 days of gratitude. Each day we will focus on one area of our life to be grateful for. If this is your first day doing this I invite you to go back and do the days before this. You can do them in your head, write them down and home, but it is my hope you decide to share what you are grateful for with our community here on Secret2anamazinglife.com. There are no rules. Do one day or do all 30. Let us now look at today’s area of gratitude.

Once again, my answer was quick in coming for this question. My answer to who in my life I am grateful for is –¬†EVERYONE.¬†Really Neil? Everyone? Yes. Everyone. Of course I am grateful for all of the people who bring goodness into my life. The person who gives me great customer service. The friend who is always there to listen. The coworkers who help make my job easier and the day more pleasant. All of the people who share with me their stories of inspiration. The followers of this blog post. It is those of you who read it that keep me writing. More to the point, I am grateful for those who interact with this online community as well. A like, a comment or creating a discussion, that makes it all worth while. Those who have read my book, especially those who let me know what they thought of it.

What about those less than pleasant people? The person who provided little to no customer service? How about the waitress who refused to wait on me because she just was divorced and hated men? (This really happened one day when I had lunch with my mother) What about those you thought were good friends that have disappointed you with gossip or betrayal? How about the coworker who always complains or makes your job more difficult than it needs to be? Am I really grateful for those people? Yes. Just like other areas of my life, I either win (have a great personal interaction) or I learn (have a not so great personal interaction)

In the book¬†The Power¬†by Rhonda Byrne, the sequel to the very popular book¬†The Secret,¬†these people are referred to as a P.E.T. That stands for ‘Personal Emotional Trainer’. Have you ever heard someone say, “That person really tried my patience!”? That is exactly what they are doing. Giving you an opportunity to practice and grow such valuable traits as patience, compassion, understanding and even anger management. These can only be done with people who upset you. They are helping you to grow and develop your character. Be grateful for them too.

I am grateful to all of my close family and friends. They have indeed practiced these traits with me over the years. That has taught me by example. Most of all, I am grateful to the person who has the toughest job in the world – my lady Margie. It cannot be easy being the girlfriend of a man who wears so many hats (postal worker, DJ, author, blogger, speaker, YouTube creator) who doesn’t really sleep, who has crazy ideas at all hours of the day. Who is constantly wanting to do different things to make sure we have the best relationship possible. I am sure that cannot be easy. I am grateful for everything she has taught me not only about love and friendship, but even about myself.

How about you? Is your list of those you are grateful for as long as mine? Is there someone who has really touched your life that you are grateful for? This is the perfect time and place to mention them.

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30 DAYS OF GRATITUDE (DAY #8)

Welcome back to our celebration of 30 days of gratitude. Each day we will focus on one area of our life to be grateful for. If this is your first day doing this I invite you to go back and do the days before this. You can do them in your head, write them down and home, but it is my hope you decide to share what you are grateful for with our community here on Secret2anamazinglife.com. There are no rules. Do one day or do all 30. Let us now look at today’s area of gratitude.

There is an obvious answer here and that would be my book, A Happy Life for Busy People. It is true I am very grateful for that book. It has opened so many doors in my life and introduced me to so many wonderful people. It is also owned by rock stars, movie stars and billionaires. If you would like your own copy there will be a link at the bottom of this post. Yes, that is one of the books I am most thankful for.

There are, however, a handful of books that I would recommend everyone read. Let us start with my favorite book of all time, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. I read this book on average once a year. I gain something new everytime I read it. That is the amazing thing about a great book. You always gain something new from them each time you read them. Not because they are different, but because you are. I also loved the book The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. This law of attraction classic is filled with great basic ideas and formulas. The World According to Mr. Rogers is another favorite filled with great stories and fundamentals. Anyone who knows me knows that I am also a big fan of the Winnie-the-Pooh books by A.A. Milne. Not only are they uplifting and full of joy, they often have great lessons hidden in their pages.

 Books are stored knowledge. You can save yourself years of work by reading the lessons someone who went before you wrote. You can escape by slipping into pages that transport you to entire different worlds. You can learn, you can be inspired. There are so many books to be inspired by. Which are some of your favorites?

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RAISE YOUR VIBRATION


Those of you well-versed in the Law of Attraction know how important it is to raise your vibration and keep it high. It serves us well for manifesting what our hearts desire. For those of you who may not be that well-versed in the Law of Attraction, raising your vibration means raising the state of how you feel. Simply put, the higher your vibration, the better you feel.
When we feel good all sorts of things open up to us. We are more likely to try new things and talk to new people. Both of these can lead to wonderful new adventures. We take better care of ourselves and those we love. We are more likely to wear a smile and spread joy to others. To, of course, the obvious – life is a lot more fun. After all, that is what living an amazing life is all about, feeling good.
If you are thinking there is more to life that just feeling good, I challenge you on that statement. It is important to help others, yes. When we help others how do we feel? We feel good. It is important to do good for the world around us. When we do so how does that leave us feeling? It leaves us feeling good. When you are enjoying life you are far more productive and pleasant to be around. Who wants to sit next to a ‘Debbie downer’? Not me, and I would venture a guess not you either.
Do yourself a favor and try to fit in as many things as you can in the first list while limiting or eliminating as many things as you can from the second list. Do not stress about it for that would defeat the purpose. Work to raise your vibration, or feel as good as you can for the next 21 days. Make it a focus and watch the miracles begin to unfold in your life!

CLICK HERE TO GET NEIL’S BOOK FILLED WITH MORE IDEAS FOR MAKING YOUR LIFE AMAZING!!!

A SIMPLE FORMULA FOR SUCCESS

A lot of people will see this quote and think that it is not so. Of course a lot of people live a life that is south of amazing. Whether you are studying the law of attraction, business or quantum physics, you undoubtedly understand what you focus on expands in your life. The average person looks for and anticipates problems that may exist in any situation. It is a survival mechanism and can be extremely helpful. If, however, you are not just looking to survive in life, but to thrive, I suggest taking a slightly different approach.

Looking for challenges that might pop up in life is smart and I do so myself. Looking for and preparing for challenges is far different than focusing on them. When you are focused on seeing something in your life you will find it. When you are not focused on something in your life you may miss it even though it is right in front of you. If you find this hard to believe, stay tuned we will have a fun and simple experiment that you can do to prove it to yourself in just a second. First let us digest the theory that you notice what you focus on and miss what you don’t. There are people who are constantly telling others how rough their life is. How they have the worst luck. Wouldn’t you know that tends to hold true. You look at their life and some crazy things happen to them that are not that pleasant. It is not the things that happen that lead to the attitude, but the attitude that can perpetuate the events.

Those who have this challenging life may be rebeling at the notion of this, but that does not make it any less real. When you are determined to see the challenges in your life that make it such a struggle they will stand out nice and tall. Meanwhile, any good fortune you may have will go under appreciated at best, or even unnoticed at worst. When you life has a run a good luck your subconscious mind will spring into action and say, “Well he keeps saying we have bad luck. Let us go find some!” Believe me when I tell you I had a hard time accepting how responsible I was for my own life at first too. To help all of us along I am going to share a quick experiment with you that you can do wherever you are to demonstrate how true this is.

 

THE EXPERIMENT

 

Wherever you are right now whether it is at your home office, driving in a car, on the job or anywhere else this will be fun. First, clear your mind the best you can. Next, look around you for anything you see that is red. Find red anything. Red signs, people wearing red clothes, a red stop sign or anything else red. Look for red. See red and note that thing. Now close your eyes for a second (unless you are doing this experiment driving) and think of something around you that is brown. Rather hard to do isn’t it? A million brown things could have been surrounding you but you would not have noticed them because you were looking for something that is red. In fact, when you were looking for things that were red did you notice things that were maybe a dark shade of pink or wine colored just so you could have another thing that was red?

This is a basic example of how our minds work. Imagine if you will, how our life would change if we would use this for gratitude, for example. Gratitude is one of the most powerful emotions we can feel. How great would our life be if we looked for everything we loved in a situation? Think of how life would be if when we are stuck in traffic next time we played this game and asked ourselves over and over, “What can I be grateful for in this situation?” or “What do I love about this situation?”

I can tell you this formula has worked miracles in my life. I am not exagerating, but do not take my word for it. Use this experiment yourself. Do it for 21 days randomly throughout the day. Start with times you are enjoying yourself. This is a little easier and helps the brain get into the habit. Next, try it when you are waiting in line at the store, stuck in traffic or dealing with a difficult customer. Every time you use it, you will get better and so will your life. Feel free to share your experiences with using this formula.

ONE OF OUR GREATEST PROBLEMS

There are lots of crazy things I do from day to day. Often when going into a public restroom I never think to make sure I locked the door until after I am indisposed. Forgetting to make sure there is toilet paper is quite another. Still, one of the worst habits any of us can get into is talking about our problems. For many of us it has become an addiction. Like any addiction it can be extremely hard to break. Why is it important to break this habit? We are going to look at two very good reasons why we should switch from being addicted to discussing our problems to being addicted to discussing our dreams and joys.

First, there is the obvious reason – it feels terrible. Talking about and thinking about your problems can be exhausting phyisically, mentally and emotionally. The goal in our lives should be to live where we feel fulfilled in all of these areas of our lives. Talking about our problems ad nausem will not leave us feeling fulfilled in any way. When we feel down and drained emotionally and spiritually, our energy levels and immune system usually follow closely behind. This can not only make our existing problems worse, but add additional problems of sickness and lack of prodcutivity. Not only do they leave us feeling this way, but they can also bring down those we are talking to. Would you enjoy being around someone who is endlessly discussing everything that is wrong in their lives? I know I wouldn’t. Thus, you may find yourself starting to be very unpopular.

A second reason is slightly more metaphysical. Anyone who knows the slightlest thing about the law of attraction knows the saying “Where focus goes, energy flows”. In other words, what you focus on becomes more a part of your world. This has much to do with a part of your brain called the reticular activating system. This is discussed in more detail in my upcoming book,¬†Living the Dream.¬†As an example, have you ever bought a new car or even a new outfit and started to see it everywhere? Do you think many of the people in the world just started buying the same thing you did? Of course not. What happened was it became something of consequence to your brain. The RAS acts as a filter of sorts. It brings to our attention and into our realm things that we focus on and that our important to us. If you are focused on your goals and what makes you happy, you will tend to see opportunities and reasons for joy. If we are constantly talking about and focused on our problems we will not only notice more of them, we will receive more of them.

The reason talking about problems can be an addiction is because a lot of people tend to do it. Stop and listen to a conversation at work. Read posts on social media. Watch the nightly news. They are a constant stream of problems, problems, problems. If you hear someone start to say things like, “Why does this always happen to me?” or “I always have the worst luck.” You might want to consider walking in the other direction. Get into the habit of discussing your joys. What makes you happy? This may seem difficult or even awkward at first, but stick with it and notice how much better you feel. After you become a ‘joy discussion expert’ you will notice people will want to talk with you. Maybe even new social opportuinites will present themselves to you. As a bonus, you will feel better and begin to attact even more of what makes you joyful! Feel free to share your experiences in the comments below.

WHY IT WORKS: VISION BOARD

To discuss this point we must bring in your refrigerator. Yes you heard me right. I need you to think¬† about your fridge. What color is it? Does it have two doors? Do they open left to right or right to left? Now think about your car. What color is your car? What color is the interior? When I asked you to think of each of these items you had a picture in your mind, didn’t you? You did not think of “I drive a Honda CRV.” You actually pictured your car.

The reason this happened is because we think in pictures. Now if I were to ask you what your mind looks like most of us would conjure up a thought of the brain. Why? Nobody knows what the mind looks like. The mind is not the brain, but it is the closest thing we can come up with.

What does all this have to do with vision boards and living an amazing life? Let us think of what success looks like for us. Do you have a clear picture? For you it may include more money, a bigger house, a fancy car or a million other different things. If they are just abstract thoughts that your brain does not have a picture to correlate with, it will be a thought of very little power.¬†This is why we need to get clear as to exactly what we are looking for. What does ‘more money’ look like?¬†What would you like your¬†house to look like? Brick? Field stone? How many bedrooms? A hot tub maybe? What kind of fancy car would you like to drive? What color would it be?

This may seem like trivial details¬†to some. If you are familiar with the law of attraction, however, you will understand how important this can be. From a scientific standpoint, without a clear picture of your goals in your subconscious mind your brain will not know exactly what to work towards. You may have periods of productivity followed by what seems to be regression and chaos. It is the ‘one step forward, two steps back’ situation.

Enter the vision board. In a nutshell a vision board is a board with pictures of all of your goals on it. Not only will this help you see your goal (it is hanging on the wall in your hallway) but it will do so with no work on your part. You just walk up and look at it. This helps program the images of success into your subconscious mind. Now, even when you are unaware, your brain is laser focused on your goal and will be constantly on the lookout for things that match it.

When you wish to put your mind to work for you, the first thing you have to do is speak its language. As we discussed earlier, we think in pictures. By showing you brain pictures of your goals daily (you standing by the car of your dreams, the house you want to build, etc.) you are speaking them into your mind. That my friends is how a vision board works.