Tag: the secret to happiness

THE SECRET TO AN AMAZING LIFE ðŸ¤«

It is mid-week, time for a little uplifting thinking! How about how to have an amazing life, or at least starting with the rest of the week? You deserve it and it really isn’t that complicated. It is finding ways in which to turn all of the negative energy in our lives into something to be grateful for. That may sound like a daunting challenge, but it is really an opportunity! At the end of the day, it can be a fun game to play with ourselves. Even endeavoring to find the positive in the negative will have us feeling better and looking at life in an entirely different way.

How to do it? That is the question. How do you turn the negative in your life into something positive? There are many ways. I am going to share two of my favorite with you and I would love it if you would share some of yours with the readers of this amazing blog, including yours truly. The first way I turn the negative into the positive is by escaping the situation. This is not always possible physically. If you are stuck at your work and the boss is in a bad mood, you are stuck there. Maybe, like myself, you live where the sun rarely shines this time of year. I think it has been over a week since we had a day where the sun came out for more than just a little while.

If you are physically stuck in a bad, or negative, situation, how can you still escape. By using a strategy that I teach and remind everyone of constantly. That there is no law of physics or biology that states your mind and body have to occupy the same space and the same time. The body, so far as we know, is limited. It can only be where you find yourself. The mind, however, has no such limits. The picture above may sound humorous, but I have honestly used this method to save my sanity on more than one occasion. How powerful is this really? There have been stories of holocaust survivors using this method to make it through one of the worst situations man has ever found themselves in. If it can work in that situation, it can work for you and I. Try it for yourself. Recall a vacation you particularly enjoyed. Do so using as many senses as you can. The scent of the ocean and the tanning lotion. The feel of the warm sun on your skin. The sound of the waves lapping against the shore. The vision of beautiful turquoise water. The flavor of some delicious island food. Take yourself on a mini mental vacation. Haven’t been on a vacation in so long you can’t remember these things? Go buy a bottle of sun tan lotion, make some jerk chicken for dinner or take yourself to a tanning bed while listening to ocean waves. Whatever it takes to make it real for you.

Next is to use the power of gratitude. I know, I know. You have heard about gratitude over and over. Oprah talks about it. It is in the movie The Secret. Apparently, even the author Neale Donald Walsh is in on the subject. Do you know why all of these people are talking about gratitude and why you are hearing about it everywhere? Because it works. Your mind can only focus on one emotion at a time. If you are focusing on what you are grateful for, even for just a minute, your mind cannot be focused on whatever negative crap is going on in your life at that moment.

Another thing that gratitude allows us to do is to get our head out of our butt. Look, I get it, when things go wrong, it is so easy to get fixated on what is not working in our lives. Even if 99% of our life is amazing, we will focus on the 1% that is bringing us down. As we discussed a few posts earlier, according to the National Science Foundation, 80% of our daily thoughts are negative. Those stats are for the average person. We all know people who would fall below average in this regard. Where do you want to be when it comes to your thinking? By spending even five minutes of our day focused on what we have to be grateful for, we begin to create a habit. It is that habit that will allow us to become better than average thinkers. It will have us feeling joyous and abundant.

Use these two strategies to change the negative situations in your life and become happier and more fulfilled than 80% of the population. Using mini mental vacations and the power of gratitude, we can radically transform our life for the better. I would love to know any tools or strategies that you use to turn the negative into the positive in your life. Perhaps they will be featured in a future post.

USE YOUR EYES AND YOUR MOUTH!

Last post we looked at how our focus determines a great deal of how we see the world. That goes with the first half of the quote above, keeping our eyes positive. Seeing the possibilities and not just the obstacles. Seeing what is working while working on what could use some fixing. Looking at the good in a situation and just the bad. Changing how we look at the world will change the world we look at a great deal whether that is positively or negatively. That is why it is so important to keep our eyes positive.

Let us now look at the second half of that statement. Keeping our tongue positive will have the world loving us. Some of you may say “I don’t care how the world sees me!” or “The only person’s opinion that matters in mine!” To that I would say you probably have yourself fooled about other things as well. It is true that we should not live our life predicated on what other people think of us and what we are doing. That being said, if your friends, your family and your spouse go to bed thinking what a jerk you are every night, that is going to weigh on you no matter how self-centered of an individual you may be.

Considering you are reading a blog called Secret2anamazinglife, I assume you have a good deal of affection for your fellow humans. Not to mention, it always feels good to hear a kind and encouraging word throughout the day. Think of how you feel after you have been the recipient of some love and praise. Perhaps you feel energized? A little more confident. You feel believed in and supported. How would this affect your productivity? Would this affect the way you treat others you come in contact with? Wouldn’t it be great if everyone came from a place of feeling energized, loved, believed in and supported? Wouldn’t it be great if you came from that place…daily?

The truth is your world can be this way. Those you meet can, eventually, come from a place of love, appreciation and positive energy. You can come from this place and you can do so on a regular basis. Not only can this happen, but it is easier than you may think and all it takes is one decision from you. This is not some self-improvement hype or positive thinking theory I am giving you. It is the truth.

All we have to do is to decide to use our tongue to spread positivity. Let us look at how this will play out. First of all, if you know someone is walking up to you and, through past conversations you know the conversation is likely to be a positive one, how will you treat them? Chances are you would greet them with a smile, and genuinely welcome their company. When you share positive conversation with others it will make them feel loved and appreciated. That will positively impact their lives and in turn will positively impact how they act in association with you. Can you imagine if you did this with everyone in your life? Would that mean everyone in your life would be positive? Not exactly. We would be fooling ourselves if we didn’t admit that we share the world with people that see the rain in every rainbow. I know a person that if I gave them a golden goose would complain it poops on the sidewalk. Still, these people would certainly be the exception and not the rule.

This may sound like a fantasy world, but it is not. It is a simple mathematical equation. If people are exposed to positivity and encouragement, they tend to be more positive and encouraging. Not every day. We all have times when life gets the best of us. The more you spread positivity, however, the more likely you are to receive it as well. Here is the great bonus in all of this. The more you receive this positivity in return, the easier it is to go on spreading the positivity. It continues to grow in both frequency and intensity the more this equation is put into place. The exciting part is it is all up to us to start it. Use your tongue to spread positivity today and watch your life change in the days to come.

A SECRET TO AMAZING…HAPPINESS

Today so many people are chasing happiness. The look for it in books, retreats, people, relationships, money, cars and a host of other outside influences. The truth, as you may have heard, is that happiness is an inside job. Even my book, A Happy Life for Busy People, teaches you ways to find your inner happiness. Here is another hard truth. If you place your happiness in someone or something else, you are also handing over control of your happiness. They can decide to give you happiness or take it away. If that person or thing should ever leave your life, your happiness will go with it.

Taking all of this into account, how do you gain inner happiness? There are several key components to accomplishing this. Gratitude is one of the quickest and easiest ways to accomplish this. Becoming grateful for what you have in your life, good and bad, is a great key to happiness. We have devoted many posts to this and I invite you to search for some posts. Another great key to happiness can be summed up in one word – PROGRESS. That is why goal setting can be such a strong tool toward happiness and success in life. We once again refer to the quote from our great friend Earl Nightingale – “Success in the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.” There is that word ‘progress’ again. Working on losing weight and becoming healthier? Maybe you went for a short walk after dinner – progress. Doing your best to write that book that you’ve kept inside you for most of your adult life? Write 500 words – progress. In these and many other examples, you are certain to feel happier once you complete these tasks and become one step closer to your goal.

Another great way to harness the power of progress is through continuing education. Before you begin to worry about student debt, transportation or if you are too old to go back to school, let me put your fears to rest. There are more ways than ever before to educate yourself. I am very interested in the second world war and the psychology behind it. I can pull up videos on YouTube, order books and DVDs from Amazon or look for material on the internet. In addition, there are great sources at my local library. No matter what subject you choose to pursue, gaining knowledge gives us a feeling of accomplishment, or said a different way, progress.

If you add to this gaining knowledge in the field of self-improvement, you will be progressing in two areas simultaneously! You will be both gaining knowledge as well as improving your position in life. Double the progress; double the feelings of joy and happiness. Even if your goal isn’t exactly knowledge based, such as living a healthier lifestyle, gaining knowledge on the subject could be progress. I say could be because it must be followed with action. If you do pair this gaining of knowledge with action, every bit you gain will be progress. Look up what foods have the greatest thermogenic effect? Progress. Viewing and the picking a new workout to try? Progress. Picking out those cute new running shoes and then actually using them to run? Progress.

We are all looking for secrets to an amazing life. One of the key components is happiness. The secret is that to find happiness, look for progress. There are so many avenues in which to do so. Set a goal. Work to increase your knowledge base or combine the two and feel twice the feeling of progress. What in your life are you progressing toward?

THE SECRET TO HAPPINESS

How many times have you heard, or even said yourself “I’ll be happy when – ” Have you also stopped to notice these people are rarely, if ever, happy? The secret of happiness is this – Happiness is not a journey but a way of traveling. Our life is primarily made up of being on journeys. If we tie our happiness to destinations, which are far and few between, our happiness will be, you guessed it, far and few between. This seems like a foolish way to approach things does it not? That is exactly what you are doing when you say, “I’ll be happy when”

The funny thing is, when most people reach their ‘When’ they are still seldom happy. They either discover the truth in that old adage ‘the grass is not always greener’ or they spend countless wasted time worrying if their ‘when’ may be stolen from them. As you can see in our quote above, when you tie your happiness to a reason, the reason can be taken away from you. We see this when couples separate, jobs are lost or someone passes away. Sure, those are all times to express remorse and be said. What we are saying is do not let your happiness depend on an outside situation.

Instead of looking for a reason to be happy, I suggest looking for every reason to be happy. Here is a personal example of this. Today I went for a walk in the park. I was hoping to find some painted rocks that a group of people hide in the neighborhood. As I walked for the first mile I saw nothing. I noticed I became a bit discouraged. I stopped myself right there. “Are you saying that if you do not find a colored rock you will not be happy?” People walking by began to look at me funny. Not only because I was yelling at someone, but I seemed to be the only one present. Little did they know that was exactly who I was yelling at. When you ask yourself a pointed question like this one, the absurdity of the situation becomes clear.

It was then I began to feel a little foolish. Still not very positive, but better than discouraged. I looked around me. It was a very pleasant day. The sun was just setting behind a baseball diamond where a family was gathered. The temperature was just cool enough to walk without discomfort. Then I looked down and saw a family of ducks. the young ducks seemed to be exploring the park with a keen sense of fun and adventure. I was missing all of this because I was sad I had not found some of the great works of art created by the members of the West Allis Rocks Facebook group.

With an additional spring in my step and enjoying the evening that much more I walked another mile, smiling all the way. A funny note is that although I did not find any rocks as I searched diligently in my first mile, as I just walked and looked around for everything I could happy about in the second mile I found 4 rocks! When you make happiness a way of traveling instead of a destination, great things just seem to happen!