Tag: self-respect

1 THING THAT DRIVES ME CRAZY

One of the things that drives me crazy is people who explain away bad habits, a negative attitude or abusive behavior with the phrase, “That is just the way I am.” In a world where you can change literally anything about yourself, it is no longer ‘just who you are’. No, the correct phrase would be, “That is who I am choosing to be.”. When you do your best to excuse away your character flaws it says two things. One, you do not have the self-awareness or self-discipline to work on improving yourself. Two, you choose to let your emotions control you instead of controlling them.

Saying “That’s just the way I am.” makes you look lazy and disrespectful. This is not saying that you need to change yourself to please someone else. No. Having quirks and creative differences make us the beautiful unique creatures we are. When you find yourself making that statement after describing a negative behavior, no that it is a choice. “He wants me to control my temper, but that is just the way I am.” Really translates to those of us hearing it to “I have an anger management problem that I am too self-centered to work on.” If you enjoy having a bad temper, that is on you. To pretend that is something that is ‘just you’ and that you cannot change is not true.

Conversely, when you hear someone say “I am working on that.” They not only sound instantly more respectful, but also more self-aware and self-disciplined. None of us are perfect. There are all things we need to work on. If you find yourself adding the phrase “That is just who I am.” after a negative behavior, you should realize that you are making an excuse. There are no areas in our life that we cannot work to improve. Be the type of person who says, “I am working on that.” Even more to the point, be the type of person who does. You will not only receive more respect from others, but you will come to respect yourself more.

FITNESS CAN TEACH US A LOT ABOUT LIFE 💪

If you have read any of my books or have followed this blog for any amount of time, you know that I often use fitness to describe certain aspects of personal development. That is because improving your physical body shares many of the same skill requirements as improving yourself as a person. It also serves up many of the same lessons. As we struggle on the journey we develop character. The same is true in the world of self-improvement. In both, nobody can do it for you. You can‘t pay someone to workout for you and expect the results. Just as you can’t buy that self-improvement book, or even attend that course, and expect any result if you are not willing to put in the work.

What do you get from all of this hard work? In a word – respect. Not only respect from others, but respect from yourself! Even long before you reach your fitness goals, you respect yourself and your efforts. The same is true with self-improvement. It is the act of improving ourselves that gives us self-respect. It is a lifelong journey. Everyday that we work on becoming the best versions of ourselves, whether that is physical or with our character, we earn respect for ourself. That is why we must endeavor to improve. Let us use this to keep us motivated when times are tough.

BOUNDARIES FOR THIS YEAR 🌉

This year it is important to set boundaries. It is important to set goals and resolutions to make clear what we are going after. It is just as important to set boundaries to let others know what we will not tolerate. This is not meant to be antagonist, but to teach others how they should treat you.

Setting boundaries can be difficult at first. This is especially true for people you have let trample your boundaries in the past. In the long term it will actually reduce stress in your life. Quite a bit actually! It will also improve the quality of your relationships with others. When they respect you and your boundaries, you will enjoy spending more time with them. In addition, it sets the relationship up for growth that otherwise wouldn’t be possible.

Therefore, it would both serve you, and the relationship you share with this person, to make your boundaries clear and to stick by them. Remember, it may be uncomfortable in the short-term, but it will ultimately serve you long-term.

IF YOU ARE BRAVE ENOUGH ♥️

Here is an activity that is perfect for our Wednesday! Say something nice about yourself. To many of us, this feels awkward as we are told that this is not a good thing to do. We might not be told this directly, but we are warned about being self-centered or bragging. The sad part is that this often leads to a lack of self-confidence or a negative self-image. We can recognize our redeeming qualities without slipping into arrogance. There is something amazing about each of us. Acknowledging this will assist us in living an amazing life.

Think about the people in your life. When you think about all of the amazing things they bring into your life, you are motivated to treat them with the love and care they deserve. My lovely Margie, for example, always brings laughter and silliness into my life. This is such an important thing in a stressful world. For that, and a million other reasons, she is very valuable to me and I treat her as such. My mother keeps me company on walks in nature, which refresh the spirit and keep the body fit. Therefore, I value her and her company. How about you? Are there people in your life that you value for the wonderful things they bring into your life?

When you stop and appreciate the wonderful things that you bring to the world, you value and treat yourself better. When you treat yourself better, you are in a better state to treat others with kindness and compassion. This activity may feel strange at first as we are not used to complimenting ourselves. As we get used to it, we will realize what amazing souls we are. This helps us in so many ways. It helps us set boundaries with others. This can protect our physical, mental and emotional well-being. It develops self-respect. It may also help us realize our gifts and better share them with others.

I will share my answer with you, and I would love to hear yours as well. Something nice about me is that I love to share knowledge that I learn to improve life with as many others as I can. To me, the more people living an amazing life, the more amazing the world will be. Share your answer to this question in the comment below.