Tag: self improvement

CREATE YOUR OWN SUPERSTITION 🪜

Anyone who knows me knows that I find superstition to be a foolish endeavor. Do you really expect me to believe that because my path happens to cross that of a well-shaded feline that my day will suck? How about after a few shots of tequila, when I reach for the salt shaker and knock it over, that fortunes in my life will go south? Not likely. Now if I spilled the tequila, that’s a different story.

My problem with superstition is this – it is always negative. Some of you may ask why some of these hold true for you. Quick answer – law off attraction. What do I mean? Where we put our focus creates our reality. If an event occurs, such as accidentally walking under a ladder, we expect to have misfortune.

Even the date this post is written on, Saturday the 13th. Before you tell me that I made a mistake and it is Friday the 13th that is unlucky, let me ask you why? Have you never had anything good happen on Friday the 13th? I get paid on Fridays. I’m certainly not going to turn down a check if it is on the 13th. Again, if we expect something to go wrong on that day, we will be looking for it. Guess what? We will find it too. Because it is Friday the 13th? No. Because good and bad things happen every day.

My frustration with all of this gave me a great idea. Let us all create a positive superstition! They only have to make sense to us. Such as,”every time a blue car passes me, I’m about to meet someone friendly” or “whenever a see a star, I’ll be reminded of something to be grateful for. ”

These are no more real than the negative ones, but will at least have our minds looking for something positive instead of something negative. Using the part of our brain called the R.A.S, or reticular activating system, will prompt our subconscious mind to look for what we expect. Feel free to research the science behind it. It is the same way it works for the negative, only we are putting it to work for us instead of against us.

Next time you find yourself uttering some foolish line about bad things coming in three, stop right there and ask yourself how come good things don’t come in four or six for that matter? The truth is not in any superstition, it is in what we focus on. Let us create a positive superstition that will work to improve our lives. I want to hear yours. Be creative. What fun self-empowering superstition can we come up with?

REALIZE IT IS PLAY 🤾‍♀️

One of the great secrets of life we seem to be losing is the ability of being truly present. There are cell phones which keep us focused on anything but what,or who, is in front of us. It is not just technology. Many people are preoccupied with fear and worry. What could go wrong? They often miss what is going right.

It is not just negative things either. I’ve seen people walking in a beautiful natural setting focused solely on how many calories they are burning, and missing the beautiful birds, trees and animals all around them. It would seem we are too busy worrying about life, looking at other people’s lives and trying to improve our own life to actually experience life.

One good way I have found to help is stay focused is kind if counter-intuitive. Pretend you are acting in the movie of your life. When an actor is playing a roll, they have to be extremely focused. They pay attention to their lines (what they are saying) but also to how they deliver them. (How they are saying what they are saying) They consider how their performance will make the audience (other people in our lives) feel.

This is also a good way to become the type of person you want to be. When we think about how that person would act talk and think to play that roll, we can adjust our behavior to fill that roll. Eventually, we become that person. Want to be a person who has good control of their emotions? How about someone who makes others feel good about themselves? Try to act as they would. Soon, you will become them.

As a bonus, you will be intensely focused on the moment. You will see the birds and the animals. You will enjoy the company of the person in front of you and not the person on the screen you are staring at.

WEDNESDAY REMINDER 😀

Midweek! How are we doing on not only taking care of ourselves, but those around us? Just a quick reminder that it takes very little of your energy to be compassionate and encouraging to yourself and others. That little amount of energy can have a great impact on the quality of someone else’s day, but yours as well. As a bonus, the energy we expend is returned to us with the joy we bring to others.

What small thing do you plan on doing for those in your life? One little thing to encourage or inspire someone? Please share with the rest of us!😀

FIND THAT SOMETHING THIS WEEKEND 🔎

Just a reminder that in life, on any given day, we have the option to be grateful. It doesn’t matter how bad your situation is, or how much you would like it to be different. If we choose, and it is a choice, we can find what will allow us to feel grateful.

Even while striving to improve, it is vital to keep this in mind. Feeling stuck at your job, and would really like a new one? While you look and prepare, feel grateful 🙏 for having a job. Things not going well with someone at home? As you look to improve that relationship, be grateful you have someone to work with. Even the pain of losing someone we really love can make us realize how grateful we should feel for having loved so deeply.

This weekend, find that one thing, or a many things as you can, to be grateful for. Share some with the community here if you like. Then, just relax and really feel the gratitude for them. Get lost in it. Relish it. Have a great weekend my friends! 😀

TIME TO LET GO AND REDEFINE 🫡

One of the most powerful forces in life is our identity. Whatever we think we are, we will not do anything to go against it. Even if we think that it will make our lives better. That is just how this crazy thing called a human works. If we tell everyone that we are a procrastinator, no matter how hard we try, we will always wait until the last minute to finish a project. If we say that we are an out of shape person, no diet or exercise program will work. There are very few things that we were born into that we cannot change. What keeps us stuck is the belief that our actions define who we are. What they really say is who we were.

To overcome this limiting pattern, all we have to do is change a few words. The language we use with others, and to a greater degree with ourselves, has a huge impact. Instead of saying that we are a procrastinator or out of shape, say we used to procrastinate or used to be unhealthy. This is a big difference. Our behaviors are not who we are, but what we do. We are not procrastination, we do procrastination. This may not seem to be a big deal on the surface, but to our subconscious mind, which runs about 90% of the show, it is a huge deal. If it feels we are doing anything against our identity, it will fight us tooth and nail. Better to change a few words and make that positive transition easier on ourselves.

HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL 🤔

This weekend make sure to take time to recharge. However, be aware we also need to put in the effort. Getting ahead means doing the little extra that others won’t. That means putting in some hours at night, and yes on weekends, to pursue that big dream or goal of ours.

The level of success that we achieve has a direct correlation with the amount of effort we put in. That is ax thought worth keeping in mind this weekend. When you feel like binge watching a show, or spending all day in bed, ask yourself how successful you really want to be. If you are not looking to be that successful, than stay in front of that television or in that bed. Since you are reading a blog about the secrets to an amazing life, I’m guessing you want more. Remember, you can only achieve more, by doing more!

THE HEALING POWER OF BAKED CHICKEN 🐔

When I was young, my grandmother used to make baked chicken legs. Trays of them! All with Open Pit BBQ sauce. She passed away many years ago. Since then, I found other chicken, and sauces I enjoy. Still, there was something that the thought of that chicken that took me back to being a kid.

Fast forward to last night. I was relaxing, watching the NFL draft. Margie, the love of my life, surprised me by making… you guessed it…baked chicken legs with Open Pit BBQ sauce! She even added some Mac and cheese to complete the memory. Did it ever take me back!

It is good to enjoy a meal, do a certain activity, or go a certain place to reconnect with those good memories. A second bonus of this delicious memory was the realization, and gratitude for, the fact that I have had 2 amazing women who are great Cooks in my life. Is there a memory you can connect with? Take some time to do so today!

1 SIMPLE GOAL WILL GIVE YOU AN AMAZING LIFE!☝️

If you make becoming the best version of yourself your goal, you will succeed in every area of your life. Let us take a second and think of this. If we become the best version of ourselves at work, that will make us one of the best employees. Become the best version of yourself in your friendship? Who wouldn’t want to have a friend who is the best listener, best conversationalist they can be?

This leads us to the area in which this succeeds the greatest. Being our best selves in our intimate relationship will catapult that relationship to new heights! It is my first advice to anyone having relationship trouble. Work harder on yourself than even on your relationship. Why? You will be bringing your best to the person you love. This will do one of two things. It will either impress them with your effort and improvement, which is what we hope. Even if the relationship ends, you will save yourself the worst emotion. That emotion is regret. There will be no “would have” or “should have”. You will know you brought the best of yourself to the relationship. You also will be setting yourself up the best for the future.

If you are overwhelmed and wondering where to start, just start with yourself. By improving yourself, you will be improving every area of your life. This one habit will improve every area of your life!

2 REASONS YOU SHOULD BUY MY BOOK. ✌️

I recently returned from a week in the wonderful country of Jamaica. As soon as I got off the plane, I felt like a different person. Have you ever had this experience? As soon as your vacation begins, stress melts away and life just feels amazing. Whether that is driving to the mountains, flying to the tropics or any other destination. Ten years ago, I asked myself a question you may have pondered as well. “How can I carry this amazing feeling of vacation into the other 50 weeks a year that I am not on vacation?” I have spent every day since looking for the answer to the question, “How do we live like we are on vacation?” The first answers resulted in my book, A Happy Life for Busy People. It focuses on quick and simple ways to reduce stress and increase joy in your life. They all require very little effort and most can be done without spending a single cent.

As the years went by and I continued to learn more, I created my second book, Living the Dream. It took a deeper dive into how life works. How to create the relationship of your dreams. How to create a feeling of inner peace. How to better control your emotional state. How to better handle the challenges life throws at us all. How to develop a champions mindset. If any of this sounds like something you would like in your life, I suggest reading that book. To simplify this, I will put a link at the bottom where you can get all of my books. If you incorporate these tools and strategies, it will help you create a life that feels more like a vacation. Do not get me wrong, I certainly would not mind more tropical escapes with the love of my life, but every day with her seems like a dream come true. Why? We have both used the tools in this book to take our relationship to a higher level and continue to do so. We both are chasing our passion and focused on gratitude in our lives. Which leads us to the final point that will benefit you from reading my books.

With all of the self-improvement books on the market, why should you bother to pick up mine? Why did I even bother to write a book, never mind several, in a field that is already so saturated? Those are questions I get a lot. The answer is a simple one. These books were written based on two things. One, the wisdom of several very intelligent individuals. Some as far back as 500 B.C., some who are still alive today. The other is my own mistakes. That is what started my journey to begin with. My life was in a terrible state. In order to take control over my life and turn it around, I began to read. By ‘began to read’, I mean reading everything I could get my hands on. Here is what I learned. Many of the books told me that when I was in China, it was a good idea to speak Chinese, but they never taught me any of the vocabulary.

My book will not teach you how to speak Chinese. What I mean is that many books will give you practical theories, but not tell you simple ways to incorporate them. I tried the things that I read about. I recorded what worked and what did not. I tweaked them. In my books you will not only get the theory behind them, but step by step instructions on how to implement them in your own life. There are also funny personal stories of how they worked when I applied them.

If you want to change your life. If you want to start living the dream, or living like you are on vacation, I highly suggest picking up one or more of my books. Allow me to be of service to you. I put over two decades of both wins and loses, success and failure in these books. What works and what does not. It is my life’s mission to leave this world better than I found it, and that starts with you. If we can work together to take your life to a higher level, then the world, and more importantly your world, will be a little bit better. You can even share the tools with those you love and help them positively transform their lives. Whether you read my book or another, please never stop learning and improving yourself and your life. It is the best thing you can do to make the world a better place.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW ALL OF MY BOOKS AND TO GET THE ONE THAT SPEAKS TO YOU!😀

HOW MANY RABBITS 🐇 ARE YOU CHASING?

Multi-tasking… one of the biggest lies perpetuated to the masses. We may think 60,000 thoughts a day. We can only focus on one thing at a time. Don’t believe me? Try it. You may bounce back and forth quickly, but you will still only be able to focus on the one thing.

The same thing with doing something. You may bounce back and forth between activities quickly, but you are still only doing one at any given moment. The more you spread yourself around the less you are actually putting into anything.

To conceptualize this concept, I picture a scale. You know those ones with a cup on either side. On one side would be the quantity of activities you are pursuing. On the other side, the quality you are bringing to each activity you are pursuing. It I’d an inverse relationship. Not only will you bring more quality by focusing on one activity at a time, but you will actually get more done in the long run! Next time you are tempted to multi-task,picture that scale with the 2 cups. Then ask yourself, “Am I looking to bring quality or quantity to the world?