The power of habits is greater than what we think. In fact, most of us do not think about habits much at all. We just do them. That is why they are called habits. One of the secrets to an amazing life is to create actions that we take on a consistent basis that we do not even have to think about. Do you know what an action that you would take on a consistent basis is called? It is called a habit! Generally, we do not actively create habits. It would seem they materialize by themselves.
What if we could create a habit, that is an action we take consistently, that would help us on a journey to becoming the best version of ourselves? That would be like putting our success on autopilot! Two of the best times to start new habits are first thing in the morning and last thing at night. The reasons should be obvious, but we will take a look at them. First thing in the morning helps craft the course of our day. If we can start off with a win, or something that puts our focus into a positive state, that will make the rest of our day more successful. Right before we sleep with have us resting with more peace and allow our subconscious mind to work on our goals while we sleep. This allows us to wake up refreshed and ready to face the day.
What new habits could you develop that would bring you closer to success? What ideas to you use that will help make your new successful habits stick? Please share with us in the comments below.
One of the questions I am often asked is, “How can I stay motivated?” This is the wrong question to ask. You will never be motivated 100% of the time. Motivation comes and goes. I can surround myself with workout quotes, pictures of the body I would like to have and upbeat music, but if it is below freezing outside, I am not going to want to go to the gym. The better question to ask is “How can I stay committed and disciplined?” There are many ways to do this. One of them is considering the consequences of not being disciplined. If I stay in bed all day the boss will not be happy and I may end up without a job. Another way is to focus on what you will gain by remaining committed. If I keep going to the gym, eventually I will fit into that new bathing suit.
If we are honest, some days none of this works. We do not care if the boss is mad or if we get fired. Hey, if I don’t have a job I could sleep in every day! We don’t consider the fact it might be in a cardboard box if we can’t pay our bills. What about fitting into that new swimsuit? Well, we don’t have to go to the beach. Plus, these doughnuts look and taste really good. I have had those moments. Have you? What then? How do we maintain our discipline when our motivation to do so has left us long ago? Example.
I am so grateful to have an amazing women that has me wanting to be the best I can be for her. She is so beautiful and loving that I often question what I did to deserve her. Still, after working all day without sleeping, I can lack the motivation it requires to be a great life partner. What then? I think of the example I am setting. For her children who may be watching. For other men who want to know how to properly treat their lady. To women looking for an example that men do value their lady. Maybe someone caught in an abusive relationship who needs an example of a healthy one to realize that theirs must change.
The same holds true for everything I do in my life. You never know who is watching. Our lives are either warnings or examples. In the age where you can be filmed and go viral for just about anything, wouldn’t you rather it was something good? I know I would. People will rarely listen to what you say if your actions do not support it. If you truly want to inspire others, focus less on what you say and more on what you do. I am going to leave you with one of my favorite quotes that highlights the importance of actions over words.
Here is a subject that we have talked about before on this site, but I was reminded that many of us still have not got the message. There are so many of us that are lack the bravery to share their true self with the world because they base their value on the opinions of others. That is why I liked the quote above so much. If we think of ourselves as that flower, how sad would it be if we could only bloom if someone else watered us? Many are still like this. That is why we need to both encourage ourselves, as well as be aware of all the good we bring to the world. You are a rockstar no matter how large the audience is or is not.
The only thing that saddens me more is someone who lets others determine their worth. If you asked someone directly, “Would you let anyone tell you how much you are worth?” Most of us would answer a resounding “No!” Yet, this happens all too often. Recently, I heard of a woman who even said she felt like ending her life because a man she was recently dating was mad at her. You may be thinking what some dramatic teenager has to do with your life. Here is a surprise, that woman was in her 70s. She had not learned to value herself enough that the opinions of others do not define her.
This is not to say you should not care how you effect others. If what you do hurts someone, you should recognize that and work on becoming a better version of yourself. We should be on a journey of becoming the best version of ourselves. When we are, if others do not value us, we know that our life still has value. I am here to tell you that every life has value. We can all make a difference and all have our own unique gifts to bring to the world. Do not let anyone convince you of anything less.
Last post we discussed why you should keep your talk about others positive. As you can see in the photo above, today is along the same lines. My current age is where you start to see you and your friends begin to experience some problems of the body falling apart. This is why it benefits you to take as good care of yourself as you can, but that is a story for a different day. What is striking as I stroll through my connections on various social media pages, is how many people have passed away. I am not sure how long I have been on Facebook, but on that site alone, the number of friends I have lost is well in the double digits. Some have died to to tragedy such as car accidents. Some have had health challenges. A few have even died from addictions. Very few of them were expected.
I have often compared our lives to the sands in an hourglass. The sand never stops going from the top to the bottom. The bottom of the hourglass is all of the moments we have lived. The top of the hourglass is how much life we have left. Unlike an hourglass, we never know how much sand is in the top half. What we do know is that is continually shrinking. If that sounds a little scary, it should. What that means is we should live our lives with a sense of urgency.
This picture of people having coffee is fun. They all seem to be about the same age, but how long does each of them have left? Here is a not-so-secret secret, none of us know how long we have left. Can you imagine if we all had a battery indicator, like the one on our phone, above our heads as we walk around. If you knew someone’s battery was about to run out, would you treat them any better? “Look at John, his battery is on red. We better tell him how much he has meant to us.”
Don’t let age fool you either. “Look at Betty, she is young. Her battery must still be green and almost full.” It is true that Betty might be youthful, but that does not mean she has a lot of time left. We certainly hope so for Betty’s sake and for all who care about her, but we do not know. Unfortunately, we do not have the benefit of any indicators, be they hourglasses or battery warning lights, to tell us how long any of us have left. It is one of those universal mysteries.
Funerals are always hard. The worst emotion felt at funerals, in my humble opinion, is regret. The thought that we wish we had done more with that person, or shared how much they meant to us.Worse than that is if we had left with anger or nothing at all. One of the most foolish assumptions we make is thinking that we still have time. As discussed earlier, we do not know how much time we have at all. The time to share how much someone means to us is now. The time to patch up arguments and forgive transgressions, same time – now. Even if these attempts are not successful, the fact that we tried will eliminate much of the feelings of regret we would otherwise feel.
Try to remember we never know how much time any of us have left. You, or the other person could be gone tomorrow. If it helps, think of the hourglass or battery light. Realize that none of us know how much time we have left. Live your life with the urgency and passion it deserves. Ponder the quote below as you go through your day.
This is an important message for today’s world. We need to shift from placing blame, to creating solutions. They only way to do this is by working together. It can be simple to say, but I know it is not easy to do. Hurt, years of oppression, violence, and division have been going on since the dawn of man. How can we hope to reverse this trend?
If you listen to what you hear from politicians, world leaders and the media, it is as soon as we Conquer the opposition. That is a lie. The solution lies in forming mutual respect with the opposition. This requires both sides to admit the wrong they have done and pledge to work together to create a solution to prevent those wrongs from occurring in the future.
What does this have to do with you and I? Plenty. We cannot wait for world leaders and those running out country to remove their thinking apparatus from their sitting apparatus. That may never happen. We have to startwith us. Work on eliminating our prejudices. At the very least, stopspeaking hate and division and start thinking of solutions. Vote for those who do the same instead of those running on a ticket based on fear, blame and revenge. Most importantly, raise children who respect others and want to make a difference in the world.
It is not to late to save the world and the people who live in it. The change has to start with someone. Why not let it start with us and why not start now?
This may sound like something that could never happen. In today’s world of the division and hate perpetuated by media, this may sound like a fantasy. It is not. People who are different from each other not only can get together, but they should.
We learn so much more by expanding our horizons. We could learn a new way of cooking or a new recipe. We could discover a new type of music. All the things we learn could give us a new perspective on the world.
Appreciate those who are different from you today without judging them. Watch your world expand and grow.
Anger sucks. Feeling anger causes many poor physical symptoms. High blood pressure, depressed immune system, and impaired judgment. Can you imagine how maintaining these for any length of time could affect you? There are some people who live an angry lifestyle. Continuous high blood pressure can…well…kill you. That certainly is not envious. Short of killing you, there are many other bad options from high blood pressure. I will let you research that on your own. A constantly depressed immune system means you will suffer many more colds and illnesses. You will miss more work and not be as productive in general.
What is worse than anger? When you let someone else’s anger make you angry. It is like trying to put out a fire by throwing gasoline on it. If we are being honest, it can really be difficult to not get angry when someone is yelling at us. When we do, however, we fall victim to the three conditions mentioned above. We did not even mention the impaired judgement. Sure, what someone did to anger us is most certainly terrible. When we respond from that state of anger, the chances that it will be a good response is slim to none.
Work on mastering your emotional control and your response to anger. When you do become angry, realize your ability to judge the situation objectively is seriously compromised. Learning how to get yourself out of anger quickly will reduce the chances of having to deal with the consequences of choices made from a poor emotional state.
Let us end the week just as we started it, with that loveable bear. Today, he reminds us to look at life as if it were a journey. This seems like a no brainer, as that is what life is. Yet, some of us, especially high achievers, like to view life as a continuous problem to solve. There will be problems to solve in life. That is true. However, if you view life as a succession of problems, you will have a life that does not feel very rewarding and fulfilling. Dare I say, your life will feel like you never get ahead and as soon as you have one thing figured out, another problem seems to crop up. Have you ever felt like that? I am sure there are times we all have.
Feeling like this throughout your entire life can leave you feeling defeated and may even have you questioning the purpose of life itself. If we remember that life is a journey, and like any journey there will be peaks and valleys, we will have a much better feeling. It is important to also consider that there are many things that you can only learn and develop in a valley. When you become rich and successful, you may not be able to see the beauty in the simple things of life. When the simple things are all you have, you appreciate them more. This can often manifest itself in romantic relationships. When you are in one for a long time, you can forget the pleasure that comes from receiving a hug after a hard day, or even having someone to listening to you when you talk.
Starting today, remember not only that life is a journey, but remember to see the beauty in that journey. Enjoy your journey, both the peaks and the valleys. For this is a journey we only get to travel once.
How about this advice from Mark Twain? It is really so true. Today, the day you are reading this post, has the potential for being the most beautiful day of your life so far. It doesn’t matter what challenges you are facing, what the weather is like or whom you have to spend the day with. We need to understand, and appreciate, that true beauty comes not from outside circumstances, but inner gratitude and appreciation for the beauty that surrounds us. I am a huge fan of sunny warm days, yet there is beauty to be found in the rain. There is a majesty to be found in storm clouds and thunder.
Is it a traffic jam, or is it a driving break to say some positive affirmations and sing along to your favorite song at the top of your lungs? Is it a red light delaying your journey or a chance to lean over and kiss the one you love? Is a workout something you dread doing, or is it something you can do to get you one step closer to that healthy body you are shooting for? At first glance, you might notice all of these facts can be true. It is the ‘glass half empty or half full’ question. Both ways of looking at it can be true, but one feels like lack and you are missing something, the other feels abundant and like you have something. Both are equally true, but how we choose to view it determines how it will make us feel.
Give today the chance to become the most beautiful day of your life. At the very least, just don’t get in the way of it becoming so. Free your mind of all the worry, fear, anger and other nonsense that we often fill our heads with. Instead, actively look for all the beauty and things that you can appreciate about the day. Feel free to share some of those wonderful things you discover!
What is something good that has happened to you today? Sharing positive stories with a negative world is like lighting a candle in a dark room. Not only does each one help, but each one makes it a little brighter.
So please share something good that happened to you this weekend with all of us. 😃
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 