Forgiveness is a gift you truly give yourself. Most of the time, the person you are upset with could care less if you forgive them. Harboring anger only steals your peace. Knowing this, why do people put off forgiving others? I believe there are two reasons. Let us take a look at these one at a time.
First reason people don’t forgive others is that somehow they equate that with the other person ‘winning’. The opposite is actually true. If you let the person continue to keep you in a state of hurt and anger, then that would be closer to ‘winning’. In actuality, the only winning is living a peaceful and rewarding life. That can only be accomplished through forgiveness. If someone is still renting space in your head or your heart, evict them!
The second reason people withhold forgiveness, is they assume forgiveness means they would have to reconnect with that person. This is certainly not true. There are people who sadly can be in our hearts, but not our life. If there is someone who has done you so wrong you want them neither in your heart or your life, than youmust forgive them. By holding on to anger, or some feeling of hurt, you are maintaining a connection.
Saw these 2 items next to each other on the store shelves the other day. Thought it a rather dangerous proposition. If you weren’t careful, this certainly could make a bad situation even worse. Then, I was reminded of a very interesting fact that caused me to look at this in an entirely different light. It also gave me the idea for today’s post.
I posted this on social media and one of my friends commented “Life is all about balance.” This is so true. Sometimes life doesn’t seem to be moving at all, and sometimes it is going by too quickly. It never seems to be right in the middle. If so, at least not for long.
This is actually a good thing. It means there is always an opportunity to work on improving our lives just that little bit more. Life is a great adventure. Just light the tightrope walkers at the circus, we need to make little adjustments to stay upright and keep moving forward. Even if you happen to fall down into the net, you climb back up to the tightrope with a little more experience, and hopefully a little more balance.
Mr. Lee has given us some great thoughts to ponder in his lifetime. This might be one of the best. When we are defeated, that means we have given up. We have waved the white flag. There are times that all of us have felt this way. You have a day, week, or even longer, were you seem to have one thing after another go wrong. I have been there. I think we all have. If you stop and think about it, as long as we are willing to persevere, we are never defeated. Yes, we may be down and out on our luck, but we are not defeated so long as we are willing to get back up and try again.
Next time you feel like a problem has knocked you to the ground, try to keep this thought in mind. It might not be a bad idea to print it out and hang in on the bathroom mirror. Especially when you are having one of those runs of bad luck. Then you can confidently say to yourself, “This problem has knocked me down, but it has not defeated me as long as I am still trying.” There is honor in not giving up. If nobody else tell you, we are proud of you and the community at Secret2anamazinglife is proud of you.
Next time you are feeling defeated, just remember this quote from our good friend Bruce. Stand up straight and say to yourself, “Even though I am feeling defeated, I will not be defeated until I stop trying.” Refuse to let life’s challenges get the best of you! You got this!
We would love to learn more about all of our fans here at Secret2anamazinglife.com. We are followed by so many amazing souls in over 200 countries. We, of course, have many followers in the United States, but in every corner of the globe as well. From our thousands of followers in India and South Africa, to new comers like Gambia and Maldives. We want to know how you enjoy our site. When do you read it? What do you enjoy about it?
We also would love getting to know a little bit more about you. Where do you live? Why do you enjoy reading Secret2anamazinglife.com? Any other fun bits of information you would enjoy sharing with us. We wish to not only be a source of information, but a community as well. By getting to know those in the community, we can only improve on the quality of the content we bring to you. If you do enjoy the site you are reading, we would be honored if you would consider sharing it with your community. Whether that is telling your family and friends, printing it out and putting it up at the office like our friend in Lebanon does, or sharing the link on your social media. You will be part of a community looking to inspire and leave the world a better place than when we found it.
Please do the honor of sharing a little bit about who you are, where you are from and what you enjoy about this site. We would love to know when you enjoy reading Secret2anamazinglife.com. We would love to hear from all of you!
How many of us pursue these goals? The quest for perfection in any category is a fool’s endeavor. We should always pursue becoming the best version of ourselves. That doesn’t mean we will be perfect. In fact, when we make mistakes, that gives us the greatest opportunity to learn about life and about ourselves. Being able to set boundaries and say the occasional ‘no’ will keep us mentally and physically healthy to be able to bring our best when we do say ‘yes’.
When you are pursuing awards, think in terms of ones that speak of your character. How about the award for being a true friend? There should be an award for being a loving spouse. A helpful coworker is always appreciated as well. These are awards worth pursuing. At present, it is a shame that none of them exist either. Make sure whatever you are pursuing will lead to the best for you and for your life.
Here is an inspirational story that occurred to me when I was not expecting it. This is one of the perks of being an author and blog writer, you are subconsciously on the lookout for inspiration. Margie, my mother and I were on our way to the Milwaukee Public Museum for a special behind the scenes event. We were all pretty excited because the museum will be moving in a few years and you may not have an opportunity to see many of the things that were on display that night. The only downside to going there is driving and parking downtown. Luckily for us, at night there is an attached parking garage that is not to full in the evenings. This is where the inspiration happened.
It is ironic the inspiration of the evening came before we viewed any of the 4 million objects the museum has, including this cool whale over a staircase. When we were entering the parking garage, we were greeted by a friendly young man we will call Chad. This was kind of a small miracle in itself as the people at a parking garage barely recognize your existence, much less are friendly. After exchanging some banter, he even gave me a fist bump and raised the gate to let us in. I recall saying to Margie and my mom, “Hey, I just got a fist bump from the parking guy.” We all had an appreciative chuckle and enjoyed our night at the museum. I am sure this gents friendly greeting made it that much easier.
When we left, the parking garage was a lot busier as everyone was leaving the even at the same time. As we made our way up to the gate to leave the parking structure, guess who was there? My new friend Chad. We exchanged more pleasant banter and he even explained a little about the economics of the parking garage. He was so friendly, I gave him a card for this website as I felt he would really appreciate it. Although all of this was enjoyable, what he said next is what inspired me to write this post. “Thanks, I have an issue with my brain and they tell me I only have a year and a half to live.” I did my best not to be too shocked by this revelation, but I was thrown for a loop.
Here are the points I walked away from this experience with. One, I was extremely grateful that I was motivated to exchange some pleasant back and forth with this young man. Many times we just go about our business and fail to appreciate the human element involved in it. Second, it amazed me how upbeat and friendly this gentleman was. He only had a little over a year of life left and was working in the cold in a parking garage, yet he made our night so much better through his friendly demeanor. He could have been like every other parking attendant I have dealt with, and barely acknowledged me at all. Instead, this young man shared some friendly conversation, helpful information and a great smile. We are going back in a couple of weeks for another event. I hope to see my friend Chad again.
The lust for power is one of the strongest urges in human nature. Wars are started over that very thing. In fact, we have several going on at the moment. Having power over others is the main motivation of many politicians and some in the religious field. Yet, many of these lack the true source of power. That is power over ourselves. If you have all the knowledge and tools to become successful, but lack the discipline to consistently put them into practice, you will not be successful. If you have no power over your emotions and let them control your actions, your relationships will certainly suffer.
Conquering ourselves may sound like it should be easy, but nothing is further from the truth. I recall hearing in a talk from David Goggins how the mind has the tactical advantage over us. That is so true. Our inner dialogue knows our greatest fears, it knows what our strongest desires are. If left unchecked, our mind can make us its slave. When we foster self-discipline and emotional control, we make the mind our servant. We use those fears and desires to drive us to take actions that lead us towards a successful life. If we do not invest in taking this control it will have us making the same self-sabotaging actions we have for years.
Gaining control over ourselves can be one of the most powerful investments we can make. It will allow us to become better in whatever field we are pursuing. It will also allow this to happen quicker and with less resistance than if we do not have control over ourselves. Invest in power over yourself and you will become a powerful person.
I know many well-meaning people with lofty goals. One of the most popular is that people want to change the world. This sounds like such a complicated and far-reaching goal. It is, but at the same time, it really isn’t. You do not have to end world hunger or cure a major disease to change the world. Being a great parent and raising children that are kind and respectful changes the world. Trying to uplift the spirits of those around you will change the world. These actions may seem trivial, but when you think of the outcomes long-term, and what the outcome would be if you took the opposite action, you realize how powerful they are.
My life’s mission is to leave the world a better place than I found it. This is not exactly a measurable goal. It is also one that never ends. The more actions I take to do so, the more likely it will be to come true. One think I have learned is the quote above. “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” You may think a compliment to a stranger wouldn’t make much of a difference, but you never know what that stranger is going through or what it means to them. I used the example of picking up one piece of trash. Does not seem like that would make much of a difference, but if every person in the world did that it would mean 8 billion pieces of trash were picked up! Even if 1 out of every 8 people did it, that would still mean 1 billion pieces of trash picked up. Again, if we consider the opposite action we can see the difference even more. Imagine if every person dropped one piece of trash on the ground. 8 billion pieces of trash littering our parks and sidewalks! Imagine the difference that makes.
Doing one small act of kindness a day may not seem like it would make a difference, but that adds up to 365 acts of kindness a year. None of those are wasted. It may not resonate with the person you do it for, but it could be seen by someone who then goes on to act kind towards someone else. Thus, creating a ripple effect. Maybe nobody sees your act of kindness. Maybe you pick up a piece of trash in the woods. It makes a difference to nature and increases the frequency of your vibration. In other words, helps you feel good. What small act of kindness could you do today? Remember, no act of kindness is ever wasted!
This post is released on a Saturday. One of the great things about the weekend is that we usually have a little more time to ourselves. If not, it would benefit us greatly to take some. In that time, I would suggest engaging in some self-reflection. Many of us are so busy playing the game of life, we rarely step back to see where we are on the game board. I certainly have been guilty of this with everything I have going on in my life. Time with, and for, ourselves should not be a luxury. We need that time to become the best version of ourselves. Self-reflection helps us to be a better spouse, a better parent, a better coworker and anything else.
Ask yourself the questions listed in the picture above, but do not stop there. Think of other important questions that need reflection. One of the ones I would include is, “Where do I want to go in life?” If one of your goals is to retire early, but you are spending money foolishly, it might be time to take a look at that budget. One really powerful question to reflect on is, “What do I have to be grateful for?” During the week we can be focused on everything that needs attending to in our life. Focus on fixing problems all week may cause us to lose track of all the wonderful things we do have. Pausing to reflect on them will not only lift our spirits, but have us feeling so much happier and abundant.
This does not have to be a weekly habit. In fact, I would recommend doing it as often as you can. Even taking five minutes to reflect on all you have to be grateful for before you start your day can have such a dramatic effect, it will feel like magic. How do you incorporate self-reflection in your life? We would love to hear in the comments below.
The power of habits is greater than what we think. In fact, most of us do not think about habits much at all. We just do them. That is why they are called habits. One of the secrets to an amazing life is to create actions that we take on a consistent basis that we do not even have to think about. Do you know what an action that you would take on a consistent basis is called? It is called a habit! Generally, we do not actively create habits. It would seem they materialize by themselves.
What if we could create a habit, that is an action we take consistently, that would help us on a journey to becoming the best version of ourselves? That would be like putting our success on autopilot! Two of the best times to start new habits are first thing in the morning and last thing at night. The reasons should be obvious, but we will take a look at them. First thing in the morning helps craft the course of our day. If we can start off with a win, or something that puts our focus into a positive state, that will make the rest of our day more successful. Right before we sleep with have us resting with more peace and allow our subconscious mind to work on our goals while we sleep. This allows us to wake up refreshed and ready to face the day.
What new habits could you develop that would bring you closer to success? What ideas to you use that will help make your new successful habits stick? Please share with us in the comments below.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 