Tag: Religion and Spirituality

TAKE THEM WITH YOU

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This is my current work situation. I find myself at one of my favorite coffee shops ready to share with all of you tips that I have learned to make life a more fun, passionate and successful adventure. If you were to be watching me while waiting in line I would appear to be a man typing on his computer by himself. This, in some versions of reality, is exactly what happens. If you were to crawl inside my head, which I warn you is a scary place to be, you would see the situation much different.

Ok, look at the picture above. You see the card sitting on my computer? It is from my lovely lady. When I write outside of the house I miss her and her adorable face quite a bit. This card she gave me was for one of the sweetest reasons too. So, every time I open my computer to write, there she is. Reminding me I have a sweet loving woman to come home to and that I am working for.

What does all this have to do with your life? How can this help us enjoy life more? Well in a multitude of ways. Whenever we do anything in life we are really never alone. At the supermarket trying to figure out the best price? Thank your math teachers and parents who taught you the skills to do so. As I am writing this blog post I am reminded of many people who gave me the language skills and ability to relate to people. My grandfather was a big influence in my life and I learned a great deal from him as well. In fact, lots of things he tried telling me are only now making sense. He continues to teach me long after he passed away.

He is the idea behind this. Think of people in your life and what they bring to the table. Is there a certain person that cheers you up? If they can’t be with you when you are down or facing a sad day take a picture of them with you. Someone who inspired you to always to your best? Take them with you when you are facing a challenge. I have a friend I saw at a charity run a few years back who had his high school gym shirt on. I asked him why he was wearing it and he told me because it reminded him of when he was young and fit. I had to remind him it still fit so he had to be doing pretty good.

These all may sound crazy to you, but symbols really activate emotion and feeling on a level many things can’t. Weather it is having the help of another who can not be physically present or carrying on the memory of a loved one, symbols can be a great link for us. So next time you see me writing away seemingly by myself know there are really a whole group of people sitting with me. That being said, you can still borrow a chair if you need one.

If this post hit home for you please feel free to share it with others so they may be equally inspired.

LIKE NIKE, JUST DO IT!

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We are all guilty of this. We have a great idea of something we can do or say that would make someone’s day. Perhaps sending them a check,  or a gift. Then,  life happens.  We get caught up in the daily grind and by the time we remember it the moment has passed.  Sometimes we haven’t forgotten at all. Sometimes we are waiting for the right resources to be able to give the ‘perfect gift of kindness’. Then the opportunity or sometimes even the person passes away. What I encourage everyone to do is pick 5 people. Just 5 random people in your life. Think of one small random act of kindness you can do for them RIGHT NOW. Can you send a card thanking them for being in your life? Maybe write them a short letter, or even an email if you don’t want to take the time. Just something to inspire a smile. Maybe you can post a little something to their social media page? Bring them a coffee at work? Invite them out for coffee? There are a million possibilities. All I ask is you put something into action. Feel free to leave your ideas, and even how it turned out in the comments below.

If this inspired you or you would like to see the ideas spread, feel free to share this with your friends, relatives and anyone who follows your social media. Working together we can make the world a more positive place!

WHAT DID YOU PLANT TODAY?

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Last post we talked about planting seeds and how long they may take to sprout. What is a good question to begin asking yourself is “What am I planting?”. Quite often our focus depends on what is occurring in our life at the moment. If our life is going well we preoccupy ourselves with thoughts of all the good we have in our life and the good that is coming. We look forward to tomorrow and what is next. Then we hit a bump in the road. Something happens in our life to throw us off center. We then begin to focus our attention on that. We begin to see what it could all effect and how things might get even worse. One of the most difficult things to do, but one of the greatest powers I am learning to harness is living in action instead of reaction.

What do I mean by living in action instead of reaction? It is east to know and to practice things that will make our life successful when things are going well. It is easy to be happy when life is happy. You are simply reflecting your surroundings. You, in essence, are being a mirror. So what happens when life goes south? When a ‘bad’ thing happens? Often it is hard to focus, things seem upside down.

So what should we do? Begin by writing down a vision of what you want your future to look like. Write down the good you are looking forward to coming in the next year. Then daily begin to spend about 2 to 5 minutes a day just imagining what it will be like. Don’t just picture it, but feel it. Keep this and a list of things you are grateful for handy. Each and every day make a habit to look at them ideally twice a day, once when you first get up, and again right before sleep that is when the brain is most suggestive. Then, when hard times hit and you are having a hard time picturing the good in life you will not only be in practice you will have a written script to help you as well.

As always if you enjoyed this post please feel free to share this on social media as well as tell your friends about secret2anamazinglife.com. Together we can make the world a better place for all of us.

THE POWER IS IN YOU

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Last post we discussed focusing on the positive possibilities and how that can transform your life for the better. We also touched briefly on something we could do to start that process. I highly recommend you go back and read that post. Ok, we discussed starting a gratitude journal, writing five things a day that you are grateful for and why then reading them as a bedtime story. Here is what that does, it begins to have you focused on the good things that are happening in life. Another fun exercise I have seen online lately is a happiness jar. Where once a day for an entire year you put inside the jar one good thing that happened to you. Then at the end of a year you have 365 good memories. When you consider that means 365 good things happened in  your life you may begin to shift your thinking. try it for a month and review it. I am going to begin doing this myself and I am sure it will add a sense of joy and gratitude to my life. It adds something else as well. I force that will aid you in accomplishing your goals, that will render obstacles powerless.

What is this power? Faith! Every religion on earth will tell you about the power of faith. They may kill each other over their differences, but they all agree on the power of faith. Now I am not here to tell you what to believe. There are other blogs for that. So whatever your faith is in, be it a higher power, the universe or even yourself, faith is worth it’s weight in gold. What is faith? Faith is a sense of certainty. When you are certain things will work out you do not fret that there seems to be a delay or obstacle. You see them as the temporary things they are. It provides you the reason to keep going. It provides comfort when things seem upside down.

So how does one develop faith? This is a personal issue and one I work on daily. I suggest focusing on things you have already overcome. Also recall situations when a solution showed up where none seemed possible. Once again I refer to a tool mentioned in my book A Happy Life for Busy People that is a  journal. If we do not record these memories they may  be lost to time and not able to recall.

I invite you to do your own research on developing faith. Also if you have practices you are currently using or are going to try, feel free to share them here for the benefit of our other readers.

IT’S NOT A JOKE

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Normally my posts don’t contain such colorful language, but in this case it proves a point and hey it’s Monday so why not. I always wondered as a young child why people of different beliefs could not get along. When I asked what I considered a well-informed adult the answer was always the same, “Well they should be able to all get along” there was always that magical word should in there. Still I noticed they didn’t. I still wonder why more people cannot come together and respect each others differences while enjoying what we all have in common.

Despite knowing people all have some of the same desires such as to be loved, to be free from harm, for their voice to be heard, we often have a hard time helping others realize these desires. We also tend to share the same fears. Most of us fear looking foolish, be unloved, or being hurt. It doesn’t matter what religion you are, or what color you are. Inside we are more alike than we are different. Another reason racism of any kind confused me. When I encounter a person who is different than I am, my first thought is one of wonder. How is this person different? How can I learn from them? What do they do to be happy? What have they learned in their life?

So remember to respect our brothers and sisters that are different than us. We can all learn and benefit from each other. Also remember on the inside we are all alike.

PICK YOUR SPOT…OR SPOTS

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As i have mentioned throughout the last couple days, i have spent a great deal of time at our state fair. This picture was taken at a bird show. Notice the wing on the right side of the picture. What is the point of all this? The State Fair is a place I go because it makes me happy. I suggest you start to find a place that just makes you feel good. I suggest making it somewhere you can get to in less than a day. I personally like a few different places for a few different reasons. As mentioned I go to the fair for a boost of positivity. Even when the fair itself is not going on you can find me roaming the grounds reflecting and soaking up the vibes of the place. I also suggest having a place you can be alone. Personally there is a small clearing in a park not far from my house that I go to. When I am there especially when the bugs are not to bad, I can meditate or just be alone with my thoughts. There is a specific coffee shop I go to write as well.

Why have all of these different spots? What is the purpose? Before I answer that let me state you do need to be flexible. I write at home and other locations as well. You can often find me meditating while I am stuck in line somewhere or having to wait. It is putting that time to good use. Still I use the above places for most of the reasons I described. Here is the benefit. When you are in the same surroundings doing the same activities it can make it easier for your brain to get into the state it needs. As I write this I am in the usual coffee shop. My brain just goes into creative writing mood. I know another author who uses the same pen for notes on an entire book. Somehow his mind connects with the pen.

Try it out today. What places make you happy? Is it window shopping at the mall? A hiking trail outside your house? Whatever place that is make it your own. There are no steadfast rules either. If you feel more comfortable meditating in a room filled with people than do that. I have a friend who is cheered up walking through the cemetery by his house. If it feels right for you and doesn’t break any laws, then by all means do that. Find your sacred space today. Feel free to share your ideas as well.

TAKE IT TO THE LIMIT

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This is me passing by a physique competition at the Wisconsin state fair. Ironically this is probably the closest I will get to being in one of these. Which is ok because it allows me to eat pizza and hot Wisconsin cheese.

Here is what occurred to me as I was passing by. These gentleman have dedicated countless hours of their days, for years perfecting there bodies. The people in the audience were there to reward them by appreciating there in efforts in one for or another. In addition there was monetary awards to be handed out. There were, I would guess, a few hundred people cheering them on. With such sacrifice this was well deserved.

This had me thinking, for those of us who dedicate years of our lives to pushing our emotional and spiritual development to the limit where is the show for that? Certainly you could share that development with the world in the form of a book, eBook or something else tangible and receive an award for that. Most of us, however, are not doing such things for rewards. Still it is important to know the human mind works harder with positive reinforcement than without it. So find a way to reward yourself for your inner development as well. Also understand that sometimes you may falter. If one of the men above does not work out for a day, or eats poorly they understand they are human. They work twice as hard the next day and just keep at it. So must you. If you slip up and find yourself getting angry, or acting harshly toward others remember we are all human. Enlightened or not. If you make a mistake in your emotional or spiritual development, do what the body builders do, work twice as hard the next day.

One other thing to keep in mind. To see these results these men worked for hours for days on end for years at a time. Quite often the same is required of us in the inner realm as well. If you do not see results right away understand it takes time, often years to fully develop. Work hard knowing the results will show themselves in time. Also make sure you reward yourself for the small victories along the way. This will keep you motivated and moving in the right direction.

JAMES AND A CUP OF COFFEE

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Here is my current work situation,  a small table in the corner of a local Starbucks. I was deep in thought with the current post I was writing for this site when an interesting thing happened. A gentleman approached me and asked me if I could help him fix the Facebook messenger on his phone. My knowledge of technology does not rank near the top of the pile, but I told him to go into his app setting and try updating them. A few minutes later I was working away and the same kind gentleman came over to thank me and let me know that it worked. There was something in his approach and genuine sincerity that made his interruptions a pleasure. So as I watched him return to his seat a few tables away I felt the urge to share with him this site. What happened next is proof you should listen to your hunches. I went over there and give him my card. He thanked me and explained he could really use some motivation because in addition to being recently divorced he had just returned from a trip to Syria, where he was from, in which he was lucky to get out of the country. He explained to me the trouble was while he was there he was under suspicion because he was an American citizen. So he finally returns and guess what happens when a person of the Muslim faith returns from Syria? Yes again suspicion. He explained how frustrated he felt because he loved both countries and yet both of them were suspicious of him. We went on discussing our beliefs on compassion and life philosophy. We exchanged phone numbers and he even mentioned he might have an idea for my next book. All of this because I had the good fortune of helping a gentleman with his cell phone issues and trusting my hunches. There are many lessons that can be taken away from this, but I will leave today’s lessons up to your interpretation.

AN IMPORTANT ADDITION

 
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Back to the discussion of my lady and I, seen in the picture above and what makes us such a strong and great couple. There is one essential element all good relationships need, and that is humor. Now whether your partner is more Jim Carey or Steven Wright does not matter. We all have our own version of humor and so does our partner. Understanding and appreciating that humor can be a great gain in any relationship, but especially in romantic ones. Quite often a humorous memory can soften the blow, or even help bring you back to love when a challenge or misunderstanding arises. So build humorous memories with your friends and loved ones. Taking pictures of them can add something special and help the memory last.
My only warning here is never to use humor at the expense of your partner. This can lead to resentment and a bad memory. Also avoid humor at the expense of others. Your partner may start to wonder what you say about them when they are not around. It also puts you in a negative light and opens the door to gossip which we discussed in the previous post.
So today’s homework, find ways to make your partner laugh and smile that will also bring you closer. Capture that humor anyway you can to use when needed.

WHAT TO WEAR

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Those who know me in person know that I am not the definition of high fashion. Some may even say I am not the definition of low fashion. Yes, my clothing generally follows the axiom of ‘function over form’. That being said I did most recently even wear a dress shirt and tie to impress a lovely young lady. So why I am writing a relationship blog entitled ‘What to wear’ if I know little to nothing about fashion? Simple, the article I am going to tell you to put on is not an article of clothing at all, but will do far more for your appearance than the finest ball gown or Italian tie. So what is this thing that can so improve our appearance? Diamonds? Fancy jewelry? Expensive cologne? Actually no to all of those. In fact this item will not cost you anything. Enough teasing, let me tell you the answer, or more to the point let me use this quote to explain what I am trying to say.

“Good humor is one of the best articles of dress one can wear in society” – William Thackeray

Is humor really that important? Yes. A good loving sense of humor can fill a relationship with many amazing things. Humor can take away the sting of a disagreement. Humor can lessen the pain of an accidental hurt. Humor can intensify love and half sorrow. So I implore of you to develop humor with your partner. Not humor of the biting sarcastic nature, but one of the fun and childish nature. Can you share a children’s joke like “What do you call a fish with no eye? fsh” Or even make up a silly word that only the two of you know that brings a smile to both of your faces? Recall moments that made you both laugh as often as you can. Always look for the joy and humor in life and in your relationship. A good sense of humor was in the top 3 of most desired traits of both men and women. Nobody likes to be with someone who doesn’t smile. So find some good jokes and always look for ways to make your partner laugh. Laughter and Love always make a good pair.