Does this ring true for you? We are so often our own worst critic. We can often be so hard on ourselves that we end up being our own worst enemy. Has this ever happened to you? That voice between our ears can be a harsh one. Where does that get us? It can leave us feeling less than, depressed and like a failure. I do not know of one good thing that will come out of any of those feelings.
Let us begin to develop a healthier and more positive self-talk. Let us try being a little more compassionate and encouraging in our inner dialogue. Let us give ourselves a little more grace. In doing so, we will also develop more compassion for others. What would happen if we turned our inner voice to one of encouragement and approval? We would develop a more positive self-image. We would have the courage to try something new. We would be more forgiving to ourself and to others. That would eliminate a lot of stress in our life. That would leave us in a healthier state both mentally and physically.
Start this transformation today. You could write down a list of things that are pretty amazing about you. List compliments that people have given you. You may not be perfect. You may make mistakes. If your intentions are true and you are working to become the best version of yourself, these are just lessons. You are amazing and deserver to be treating as such. Especially from yourself.
Today is world compliment day! Leaving whether you live in Greenland, Zimbabwe or any wonderful country that follows us, we invite you to join in celebrating with us today? How are we going to do that? By doing 2 very simple and fun things.
First one should seem rather obvious. Compliment someone. We are talking about genuine, heartfelt compliment. Not some fake flattery. Bonus points if you do it somewhere public. Like if you post a random compliment on someone’s social media page, or even in the comments below. Mine would be for the love of my life. Even when she thinksthat she is not having her best day, I think she outshines everyone else in the room. Her natural beauty is better than most women could hope to achieve with anyone amount of makeup orhairstyle.
That part is not only fun, but rather easy as well. Feel free to do more than one. It is world compliment day after all. The second thing? Give yourself one genuine compliment. Positive self-talkcan be very difficult for many of us. Especially if we were raised to be humble. That doesn’t mean thereis not greatness inside each and every one of you. At the very least, you have great choice in what you are reading online! In all seriousness, Positive self-talkcan empower us to push on when we may feel like quitting.
That brings me to my compliment for myself. I am proud of the way I show up. Last night I got only 3.5 hours of sleep. Yet, I was up at 4am on my off day to come in and work. This is also the 972nd day in the row we have a post here. That is almost 3 years straight. Despite sickness, vacation and a crazy busy life, we have had something for you everyday.
How about you? What is something wonderful about someone in your life? What is awesome about you? Feel free to let us know in the comments below, but just make sure you let the world know!
One of the greatest self-improvement tools are affirmations. They help us access the subconscious mind and improve our inner dialogue. This can be vital as according to research, 70-80% of our inner dialogue can fall into the category of negative criticism. Can you imagine being forced to hang out with someone who talks negatively about you 70-80% of the time? That is what most of us do between our own two ears. Changing your inner dialogue can be a tough task. That is why affirmations can be such a helpful tool. As helpful as they are, there are several issues with affirmations.
Some of the greatest challenges of affirmations are the conscious minds disagreement with the statements. If you are repeating “I am full of abundance.” and you are sitting in your broken down car, your brain will be tempted to say, “No you are not! Look at your car.” This is why is is helpful to change it to things like, “Abundance is all around me and flowing to me.” Something your brain can’t argue with. Another way to get around this is using ‘Askfirmations’ which we will address in more detail in a later post. Essentially, it is rephrasing your affirmation as a question. Such as, “Why am I getting more abundant?” “Why do opportunities keep showing up for me?” The reason this works is that if you give the mind a question, it is hard wired to find an answer to it. It is rather like putting your mind to work for you.
Affirmations work best when done consistently. One of the challenges to this is the crazy busy world we live in. How do we remember, and more importantly, dedicate time to doing affirmations? One way to tackle this is to set an alarm on our phone. We do this for a time we can reasonably count on. For 5 minutes we repeat our affirmations. We can do them 5 minutes before bed. Not only will we say them, but the mind will continue to work on them as we are sleeping. Our partner may wonder what we are mumbling on the pillow next to them, but we can just reassure them we are working on creating a better version of ourselves.
My favorite way to do affirmations is to work them into things we do everyday already. One opportunity that often goes under used is your reply to a common greeting. How often do people ask “How are you doing?” or some other form of the question? Average people are asked several times a day. If you are in an occupation where you work with the public, that amount goes up considerably. Therefore, the answer to that question is something you say daily. Why answer with a simple, “Good.” or “Fine.” when you could turn it into an opportunity for improving your inner dialogue? Can you imagine answering something like “I am great and getting better all of the time.” or “I’m getting healthier and happier every day.” If you get in the habit of making this your response, you will be automatically saying an affirmation several times a day.
You can see how your response to a simple greeting can improve your life. One word of serious caution is to avoid what people think are cute, sarcastic answers. They work in reverse of what we just talked about. I can’t count the times when after I tell someone I am living the dream they respond, “Are you sure it is not a nightmare?” I hear people say things such as they are barely surviving and trying to get by. Why you would be feeding your mind this kind of thought over and over is beyond me. It not only brings down your frequency, but does so to anyone else in earshot, including the person inquiring about your well-being. Use the opportunity to make your life a more positive and enjoyable place to be and to make that voice between your own two ears a more positive one!
This is an important and much needed reminder. There are so many of us that work so hard to make the world a better place and bring joy to others. Those same people are often the hardest on themselves. Check your inner conversation. Is it motivating? Recently, I noticed that my inner conversation started to lean a little more to the negative than I would care for. I mentioned to Margie, “I need to work on being more positive.” She gave me a look that showed her shock with my statement. I should have been a little more specific. My outer conversation was still very positive. However, my inner conversation was not. Allow me to give you an example. Winter is always difficult for me. The cold, the lack of life, it all has me feeling down. I decided to add a way to help with this. I decided to appreciate the effort and beauty behind the decorations people put up for the holidays.
On the outside I did pretty good. Whether I was with others, or by myself. I would remark, “Wow! That one looks nice.” or “That must have taken a long time.” I did feel better. That was until my inner voice started talking. I am not sure who that person is, but he didn’t have many nice things to say. I heard the voice in my head say, “That one is sloppy.” and “Why did they even bother to put up decorations if they were not going to take their time?” Here I was trying to find beauty and the holiday spirit and my inner dialogue turned into a holiday decoration critic. Then, I started getting down on myself for being negative.
We must remember that we are human. We must be forgiving and compassionate with ourselves. Especially during this busy season. As a solution to combat my newly negative self-talk, I have begun to listen to positive affirmations on the way to work in the morning. It places positive thoughts in my head before my head can come up with negative ones. Remember to be kind to ourselves the rest of the week. In what ways are you kind to yourself?
