As we head into the week, we will be faced with a lot of information. We will also be presented with a host of differing opinions. In many ways it would seem the world is more opinionated than ever. Every post online has hosts of comments letting the person know just what they think of the post.
The truth is, all of that is exhausting. Not only for the person sharing the opinions, but also to the person listening to them. It is as if we forgot that it is OK not to have an opinion. We do not have to comment on everything we both see and hear.
This goes double if our opinion is negative. Adding negativity is add helpful as using gasoline to put out a fire. It lowers the energy for all parties concerned. You would be better moving along to find something you have a positive outlook on. It will raise your vibration and that of the world around you.
Often, we do not even have enough facts to formulate an educated opinion. When we feel compelled to say something, we end up looking for foolish than had we said nothing. This week, remember it is OK not to have an opinion.
We touched on this earlier in the week. We are going to take a little deeper dive into the subject today. I want to start with a fitness analogy because it is my belief that physical improvement mirrors self-improvement rather well. If you are a trainer looking to help someone get in shape, your best chance at success is to find an activity that person enjoys. It is not as though only one activity will get you in shape. Some people like running, some people like walking. Some go to the gym. Some work out at home. All of these will help get you in shape. Alas, there are many people who say their way is the best. It might be the best…for them. I think we can all appreciate that there are many different ways to improve our physical fitness. At the end of the day they all lead to better physical health.
If this is so easy to understand with physical fitness, why is it so difficult to understand with religion and politics? Someone can practice a different faith than you and still lead them to a greater sense of peace and connection with their creator. If what they practice helps them become a better version of themselves for their family, community and themselves, who cares if it is different than ours? Same with politics. Yes, we have different beliefs on how things should be run. At the end of the day I think we all want a safe, affordable place to live where we are free to think and be any way that does not harm others. Rather than screaming at each other for being different, why not find ways in which our different approaches lead to the same goal?
This happens even among self-improvement teachers and coaches. “My method works the best!” you will hear someone claim. Maybe it does for them and a select group of others. A different method may work better for others. That is why I listen to many different speakers. You can hear a message many times and it will not resonate with you. Then you hear a person explain it just such a way that it finally clicks with you. Would you waste your time screaming at all the other people that they are wrong, or would you accept that their method may work for people who are different than you? This seems like a commons sense question, but it should be asked more often.
Can you think of examples where there may be different paths to the ‘top of the mountain’ that will all work? Can you think of ways people can work together despite their differences?
Last post we discussed the seeds of division being sown by those in power. Many people have found themselves attached to a group they joined with the noblest intentions, only to find that group is now propagating hate, division and even violence against others. The sad part is they are sticking with that group because in a world that seems so polarized, it has become a part of their identity. They fear if they now agree that the group they belong to has gone too far, it will negatively reflect on them. It is up to those of us who do not belong to that group of hate to assure them that they do not have to remain part of such a cult. By stepping away they will not let anyone down. It is the group they supported that have let them, and so many others down. They have done so by spouting lies, twisting facts and doing their best to pit neighbor against neighbor. They do this to make it easier to control those in the group.
I would like you to read and ponder the poem above that was written during world war two. In today’s political climate, you could be in a group that is being persecuted. By pointing your fingers at your neighbors and blaming them for all of the world’s ills, you may have nobody left to support you should you ever be the victim of hate. Those neighbors could be in your neighborhood, or on the other side of the globe. Understand it is not your neighbors that are the problem. It is the leaders your neighbors are following. They are looking to distract you with hate and division in order to fulfill their agenda.
Think of this example with the ants. Then ask yourself, who is shaking the jar that has caused my own prejudice? What is their benefit for having me hate my fellow human? Do you get to know people without asking their beliefs? Even if your reason for hate is something as shallow as how someone looks, have you ever given yourself the chance to get to know them before judging them? The amount of things that we can learn and benefit from each other that we would lose if we fail put our hate aside is not only a shame, it is a disgrace. When we subscribe to these artificial reasons for hate and division, we have become pawns and puppets for those seeking to control our mind and way of thinking.
This was brought to my attention listening to the song Coming in from the cold, by Bob Marley. That is where the lyrics above come from. It can be the system that makes us hate our brothers (and sisters). It can, as the lyrics states, even make us kill them. This we have unfortunately seen far too much of lately. Political violence is not only a tragedy, it is asinine. You are committing a crime, and ending a life, for someone who not only does not know who you are, but could care less who you are. That person, though they may differ from you in beliefs or culture, often share the same struggles. They are trying to raise a family. They are trying to afford food, shelter and other needs. Whether you are committing a violent act, or simply filling your heart with hate, you have become a victim of the system.
It is only through working together, as human brothers and sisters, that we can solve any problem. It is through compassion, compromise, and understanding that we can coexist. This may sound like a fairytale in today’s world. That is what some would like you to believe. It is not that far away, and it must start with each and every one of us. Learn to accept someone’s differences. Learn to be a good neighbor. Learn to show compassion. Learn to compromise. Learn to understand instead of judge. When we do so, we are coming in from the cold and we can put those that seek to divide us out in the cold where they belong.
Look at the two gentleman in this photo. One is myself, one is my good friend Montell. Ok, there is also a guy unwillingly photobombing in the back, but let us focus on the two up front. Montell is wearing a Chicago Cubs baseball team hat. I am wearing a Milwaukee Brewers jersey. As this post is published, they are playing against each other in the baseball playoffs. It is a great team rivalry. I am also wearing a Green Bay Packers hat. The local football team. Montell is a big fan of their rival, the Chicago Bears. We are of different nationalities and have different skin colors. If I were to think a little harder, I am sure there are other differences that could be pointed out between us.
Why am I pointing out these obvious facts? Let me answer that by sharing one more fact with you. If you were to ask me to tell you about Montell, what would follow might take a while. None of it would consist of what I told you in the paragraph above. What I would tell you is that he is an amazing father, a great husband to his wife Tanya, a great friend, a compassionate understanding fellow to strangers he meets and one charismatic and talented entertainment with the microphone in his hand. There are more great things I could tell you, but I will just conclude by telling you that he is someone I hold in high regard.
I also forgot to mention that we drink the same kind of beer. It so impresses people that it is now the number one selling beer in the country. The second part of that statement is true, not sure if it has anything to do with Montell and me, other than our purchases of it. What is the point of the fact that I hold someone who shares so many differences with me, some like the sports teams could be opposite, in such high regard? It is the fact that it is possible. Those in political power would have us believe that Montell and I should not like each other. At the very least, that I should not hold him in such high regard. This has to be one of the stupidest trains of thought.
You might want to sit down because I am about to tell you something that just might blow your mind. Two people can have different, often conflicting, beliefs and opinions and still respect each other and hold each other in high regard. This should not be news worthy. With the demonization of political rivals, people of different races or that come from different places, we seem to be regressing. This was a popular sentiment in 1930’s Germany. It did not end well. It is up to us to not fall for such ‘black or white’ ‘us verses them’ mentality. There is a great truth in the cliche of “Divide and conquer.” By turning us against each other, we are easier to control and manipulate. If you find yourself a part of such a group, or following a person who actively promotes hating someone different than you, work to get out of it. We will touch on how to do that a little more in tomorrow’s post.
When I think what a great friend and person in Montell that I would have lost out in knowing, I can’t help but pity those who fall for such division. Yes, I did say “fall for”. You cannot lump all people of a certain category, whether that is race or astrological sign, together. Each person is an individual and has their own story and set of experiences. My grandfather used to tell me, if you hate someone, you just do not know enough about them. You will never convince me to hate an entire group of people. Not only am I not foolish enough to believe that an entire group of people have no good people in them. Nor am I foolish enough to believe that someone is less than, or that I have to hate them simply because they belong to a different political party, have a different color of skin or are different than me in any other way. I encourage you to come back tomorrow to learn more about reclaiming a peaceful and loving world.
Are you frustrated by the fact that out of touchpoliticians make decisions for the working class? It often amazes me to hear people who are so wealthy that they have never been to a grocery, some who don’t even know the meaning of the word ‘grocery’, tell me that grocery prices are not that bad. I suppose if you make millions of dollars a year, the fact that the price of coffee is up 15% and vegetables are up 40% would not phase you too much.
Looking at our own government here in the United States, I am not sure if any of them earn less than a million dollars. All of these folks are making decisions for you and I. Thatmay all seem a bit overwhelming. It can also lead to a great deal of frustration and leave you feel like you are far too little to make much of a difference. Like walking in a forest of huge trees, you feel rather small.
As I was driving along pondering this, life provided the answer. A Bob Marley song, Small Axe, came on the radio. The chorus of which is “If you are a big tree, we are the small axe sharpened to cut you down.” No, Bob was not advocating deforestation. Jamaica, after all, is known as the land of wood and water. It is a Jamaican saying that even a small axe can take down a big tree.
In this metaphor the ‘big tree’ are established powerful oppressors and the ‘small axe’ is a united group of people working together to bring an end to that oppression. The word that jumped out at me is ‘sharpened’. Yes, a small axe can chop down a big tree. It can do so quicker and easier the sharper it is.
In this case, sharpening is being educated. It is being united in cause. It is having a strong and well-defined‘why’. The point of this is not to feel overwhelmed when considering all the oppression in the world. No, remember the power of that small axe that is you. Remember to spend your effort sharpening that axe! Educate yourself. Unite with others and do not fear the large trees of corruption and oppression.
*no trees were harmed in the creation of this post. We do not advocate cutting down real trees
How simple would this change be? Smiling more. Working to the see the good verses seeing the bad in people. Doing random acts of kindness. It would not be that difficult at all. Something everyone could do. It doesn’t take any money. It really wouldn’t require anymore effort than it takes to see the negative.
Can you imagine if just half of the 8 billion people on the planet did that? How about if all 8 billion people did it just half of the time? It is not a difficult concept.
Think of some examples. Sports. Can you imagine opponents giving compliments instead of trash talking or putting each other down? Even just half of the time. How about politicians?What if they attempted to see the good in each other just 50% of the time? That may inspire their followers to do the same. Here is one we might not think of –religion. Can you imagine if faiths preached acceptance and compassion for those of different faiths? Again, just half of the time. Imagine the difference that would make in the minds of their followers?
This doesn’t have to be some crazy fantasy. It can happen. If you are an athlete, politician or person of faith, use your position to put forth these ideas. Tell those in power you would like them to do so. Most importantly, be an example of it in your own life!
Let me share a little bit with you. I am currently reading a book on persuasion. It is really eye-opening. How advertisers, politicians and others use persuasion to influence our decisions. We have all experienced this. We are looking up camping spots for our friend when we suddenly start receiving ads for camping gear, woods themed bedding and even a stuffed bear that talks. Yes, advertisers will use social media to put ads for things we have expressed interest in. Even if that interest was to help our friend get a spot to put up their tent.
Here is the tricky bit, most influence is not that obvious. Cereal makers place sugar filled, unhealthy and addictive cereals at eye level…for children. The boxes are full of bright colors. Ones that have been studied to foster a sense of hunger. They also have bright cartoon characters. They may even feature phrases like, “part of a healthy breakfast.” What they fail to mention is that it is a very small part, like the treat you would give yourself for eating something actually healthy. Most of us fall victim to these methods of influence. Here is the scary part. When we grab that box off the shelf, we think that we are the one choosing what cereal we are buying. As you can see, there are lots of influences we may be unaware of.
Political ads. Here is another source of influence that people do not realize. Firms are hired to pick pictures, pieces of quotes, what words have the greatest emotional impact down to even what colors reflect what emotion. Then they are mailed out to you and I. They come on our phone, our laptop, our television, our radio and even that meditation video you are using to relax on YouTube. Before long you find yourself parroting some ridiculous story about the opposition riding with the headless horseman stealing babies. Things that if you really stopped and thought about really do sound insane. Here is the truth – divided people are easier to rule. You might want to read that again.
This post is not about political ads, however asinine they may be. Trust me, there is always an election going on somewhere. It is about that fact that a good portion of our lives is manipulated by others. Even beliefs we grew up with. We might have been raised to think a certain group of people are bad. Armed with this knowledge, we never associate with such people. After all, why would you want to associate with a group of people who are bad. By never actually getting to know them, we just continue to foster the belief that was thrust upon us before we were old enough to think for ourselves.
Starting today, I beg of you to begin to reclaim your life from the advertisers, the politicians and even the outdated beliefs. Have an honest conversation with yourself as to why you believe what you do, why you act and speak as you do and where that information comes from. Before you go to the store, know what you are looking for and what is important to you. Read labels. If you still want to buy a Pop Tart, go ahead, but do so because that is what you really want to do, not because it is in front of you in the snack aisle.
Life is over quicker than we think. It is up to all of us to make sure we are living a life of our own choosing. Do not hate your neighbor because someone else told you that you should. Get to know your neighbor. We all have our faults, but we all have our skills and redeeming qualities as well. Live your life on your terms!
In some of the most divisive areas of life, this is the rule of law. Think politics, religion and social norms. More focus needs to be put on the nine. That is the solution. In math it is to see that there are multiple solutions to the same problem. In life, our beliefs can cloud us from understanding that other courses of actions have their merit as well.
Take the current political landscape. No matter what side you fall on, there is a rather “Us against them” mentality. Even if the goals are the same, which they often are, there is still extreme resistance to any opinion other than the one we hold. There are no solution oriented discussions. Think public safety. Everyone would like the world to be a safer place. Instead of focusing on solutions, they just spend energy and effort arguing that their method is not only the best, but the only way in which to accomplish this. By making the other side look like a villain, it prevents any merging of ideas, which could offer the best solution.
Religion is another area in which it is ‘my way or the highway’. Considering most of the faiths preach love, compassion and acceptance, it always seems ironic that most are filled with judgement, anger and exclusion. Faith is supposed to be our rock in difficult times, our way to inner peace and our guide in how to treat each other. Let us focus on that instead of the differences in how we go about that. We can all pray, if we do it differently who cares? We all preach love, let us all demonstrate it as well.
These are but two examples in a world full of possible situations. Think of the math equation that started this post next time you are ready to judge someone else. Just because they are different than you does not mean they are incorrect.
It is hump day. The middle of the week and our energy might be starting to fade. One of my life quests is to find healthy sources of energy. In the life of a blog writer/author/DJ who also happens to work 50+ hours a week at his day job, sleep is rarely in smoke supply.
Imagine my excitement when I came across this list earlier this week. It was not only a great reminder of the many different healthy sources of energy, but the fact that energy depletion can be far more than physical. You can be depleted in one area and it can manifest itself as a physical lack of energy.
Take the example of studying for an exam. Nothing really physically taxing about that. Pushing a key on a keyboard, or turning the page of a book. You won’t strain a hamstring doing that. It will leave you mentally drained and you may very well need a nap after. Here’s what I find draining – political ads.Regardless of party, they are always like the chicken little “the sky is falling” theme. Sucks the life out of your soul after a while.
Next time you’re tired, before you grab a coffee or energy drink, make sure you try one of the items above. The source of your exhaustion could be mental, emotional, physical or even spiritual. Make sure to hydrate, grab a power nap, but maybe focus on gratitude and love as well.
Which one of the items on the list energizesyou the most?
Here is a post I could do in this country every four years. That would be election time. In this country, there is two main political parties. There are really several others, but people do not usually bother to learn about them. In fact, when it comes to voting those who are to lead our country, there seems to not be a lot of thinking at all. More so, is picking a party and gathering facts to support the party you have picked. This is then usually used to post on social media or start disagreements with family and friends. On occasion, perhaps a complete stranger who may be foolish enough to ask our opinion on politics.
This is not only true of politics, although that serves as a great example, but in many areas of life. People accept what those in positions of authority, whether that is parents, political or religious leaders. We are like the sheep Seneca spoke of. That is not to say that many of these people are not good leaders who have our best interest at heart. We should, however, step out of the crowd and find out for ourselves. Seek a little higher ground so we can get a better view of the big picture. Learn facts from unbiased sources. Do our own independent judgement. Even more important, approach the subject and world with an open and compassionate mind.
Do not be like a sheep following the crowd. Instead use your head to think and develop opinions that are your own. Most of the people you are following have little or no knowledge of your own personal situation. Remember to approach life with an open and compassionate mind. Others can hold different opinions and still be right. What is right for them and their situation can be different than what is right for us.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 