Recently I was out on the town with a person very close to me and what to me seemed out of nowhere asked me a question in a rather spirited manner. “What the hell is wrong with you?” Catching me a bit of guard, I didn’t quite know what to say. Which, for anyone who knows me is a miracle itself. Although I contemplated beginning to list every short coming I thought I had I guessed they were seeking an answer to a more specific question. After requesting a little clarity I discovered what was bothering them about me that day. This was her reply “we have been to the different places today and you have went out of your way to be overly nice to everyone we have encountered. What the hell is wrong with you? Don’t you ever just do your business?” Funny thing is this was the second time this issue has been brought to my attention. It’s true in this busy world people often do not have time for any conversation that is not completely necessary. So why bother being friendly? Great question. Being friendly in the course of interacting brings a host of benefits to both parties. First of all the obvious answer is you make the person you are being nice to feel good. That is pretty straight forward. You also create a foundation for future relations. How is that possible. If you take a few extra minutes to show kindness to a stranger that person is far more likely to remember you. In any future interactions you have with that person they are likely to be far more pleasurable than if you have just conducted your business. You also build a relationship with that person which you never know when that may come in handy. We are all so interdependent it only makes sense to be in good graces with as many different people and as many people as you can. Plus, in any situation you make someone smile, you leave feeling better. Good ahead and be nice for selfish reasons! So if you find yourself not even extending a simple decent courtesy to people you encounter not to mention trying to spread joy wherever you go I must ask you a question, What the hell is wrong with you??
Ok, so you have decided to start the journey to a positive and rewarding life. That’s great, but do you realize how important it is as well? Let me explain. I know several people who have hard time making decisions mostly out of fear of making the wrong one. Not only does this lead to inaction and an inability to move your life forward, but it comes at the cost of one of your greatest assets. Making a decision actually liberates us from lots of stress and worry as to whether or not we are doing the right thing, or on the right path. Let us take the decision to bring more joy into our lives. If we make that choice with clear conviction a great deal of our life becomes clear. Simple test, take any situation in your life, is it making you happy? If the answer is no it tells you that situation, as it presently stands, will not work in your life. If the answer is yes, that is an area of your life you should try to grow. Not only that, but knowing the ‘end game’ allows us to stay focused when the inevitable challenges show up. If a ship is knocked of course by a storm, it does not give up and head back to port. No, it adjusts its course and continues on. We must be like a ship when the storms of life come calling. If we find ourselves without joy, we must adjust our course and set sail as soon as possible. The further we get off course the longer it takes to get back. So remember to know your destination, have it firmly fixed in your mind. (writing it down may not be such a bad idea either) If you don’t know where you’re heading, you will never get there.
If you make the decision to live a life with more joy and love, you will be amazed at the power you will have over your life. When life tries to get you down just repeat to yourself “I am determined to live a life of inner peace and joy” or whatever words strike your fancy. Make the decision, that is the first step. The rest is just figuring out how to make it work.
one interesting thing about living a positive and more rewarding life, and one you should be prepared to face once you venture on this path is challenges. Ironicly I am not speaking of lifes challenges to your positive spirit, although there is sure to be some of those, but people challenging the validity of being positive. At first this made no sense to me. Why would anyone not like a positive person? What is wrong with trying to live a life that is not only more self satisfying, but rewarding to others as well? We shall look to answer those questions and more in a future post, but I want to share with you an example of just such a situation that a coworker approached me with the other day. “what good is a positive attitude if it doesn’t change anything?” she asked me. “What do you mean?” the example she gave me seemed to shed light on one person’s view on the world. “Well, if a negative person and a positive person both fall off a cliff, will they not both hit the ground and die no matter what kind of attitude they have?” This is a good question. I think the answer may be found in the ‘life to years and not years to life’ paradigm. While it is true a positive attitude sure can help your longevity, my goal is to help you enjoy whatever time you have here, be it long or short. So what was the answer I gave this lady? Before I answer that, let me remind you of a very important lesson. People who disagree, challenge and maybe even mock or dislike you for trying to better yourself are more a reflection of themselves then of you. I know this thought may not help in the moment, but always look for the lesson. Are they forcing you to look at things a new way? Are they showing you why it is important to maintain a cherry disposition? Either way, be grateful for they are teachers wether they know it or not. My answer by the way, “Yes, they both will die, but who do you think will have more fun on the way down?” So remember, it is important to have fun every day, you never know what cliff may be around the corner!