Tag: neil panosian

WE ARE ALL GUILTY 

Do you ever stress about things you can’t change? I think we pretty much all do. Whether I’m at a show as a DJ,or working at the post office, giving a speech or seminar it just wondering through this amazing life i often hear people stressed over things outside their control. 

Sometimes it is the current political climate or what some elected official did. I have even seen people to the point of tears based on the performance or actions of their favorite sports team. What i find even more unbelievable is the petty personal issues. Who said what about who online, who is dating who, etc. 

Not only do all of these items bring us mental and emotional exhaustion, but acting this way over a prolonged period of time can cause us physical distress as well. Leading to such conditions such as ulcers,lack of sleep and even fatal conditions such as heart attacks  (for which the 1 risk factor is stress and job dissatisfaction)

So what to do about the things that upset us that are out of our control? Let us learn to do what we can and let go. Don’t like what a politician is doing? Write letters, start an online petition or just support his opponent. Your favorite team not doing well? Write a letter to the coach or general manager. Don’t like some personal thing someone is doing? Either let them know if you feel it is a must, or just focus on all your friends doing things that make you happy and proud. 

Constantly talking and complaining about conditions, especially those out of our control, does us no good and plenty of harm. Instead, do what most successful and happy  people i know do,  focus on the person in the mirror. Concentrate on improving their condition and on making them a better person. It will not only reduce your stress, but as you improve and progress it will give you something to be proud of. That will be something worth talking about!

Feel free to share your tips about letting go of what we cannot change in the comments below.  

THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT DAYS OF YOUR LIFE

Here is a great thought to bounce around your head this coming week. The two most important days of your life. The first is obvious. If you were not born, not much would be happening right now. You simply would not exist. I am going to put forth the notion that the second may be of equal importance. How can that be? How can anything be as important as being born?

Well let us take a look at what being born has gotten us. I compare it to a graduation from say high school or college. You have the diploma in your hand, but what does that get you? Not much if you do not follow that with action and direction. Nobody comes up to you and just says “Here is a job now that you graduated.” Just does not happen that way.

So what if we just stop at the first important day. We never discover a purpose. Life becomes an arduous task filled with monotony. After all if you think you were just born to pay bills and die, what do you have to look forward to tomorrow? Life just becomes more of the same. Even if by some great stroke of luck you come into a great fortune, say win some lottery, not much will change. This is why many people who come into a financial windfall end up worse than before they started. In fact, working at least gives them some purpose, albeit not one of their own choosing. Suddenly through retirement or financial gain even that is taken from them.

On the day you discover your purpose it is as if you are born anew. When your life has a sense of direction and purpose the little things that used to bother you seem to bother you less. You have a compelling reason to arise each morning. Should you become financially independent you are free to put those funds to use furthering your passion which could be helping further the career of aspiring authors and blog writers. You gain another very important gift – hope. Without a greater purpose what hope is there that life will get better? You will wake up to more of the same.

So this week begin to refocus your attention on discovering the second of the two most important days of your life. Feel free to share your purpose in the comments below and help to inspire others!

A TOUGH DAY

Did you ever have a moment where you looked in the mirror and did not like who you saw staring back at you? I had just one of these days last Sunday. The ironic thing is I love my life. I really do. I have an amazing lady, first of all. She is beautiful, smart, silly, funny and very loving. I have amazing friends that are loyal and caring. I have a great passion that allows me to share my passion of improving life and by doing so hopefully help and inspire some of you.

So what gives? If all of this is true, and it is, why did I feel so bad this past Sunday? Even those of us who are far along the path of working on ourselves run into this from time to time. At the risk of getting too personal. Just was not liking my look that night, was frustrated with not being able to reach and help more people. I left feeling unattractive and like a failure. Now some logical reflecting could have changed that. Obviously if I have a very attractive lady I must be attractive to at least her which is all that matters to me. This blog is followed in over 70 different countries so even if I don’t always hear about it I am at least reaching a fair amount of people and hopefully affecting them in a positive way. Still all of these conclusions might have well been locked in a secret vault buried deep in the remote parts of the arctic for me to see in my current emotional state.

The million dollar question then is how did I discover this answer and begin to turn my state around. Thankfully I have developed tools on my own and learned from some of the great spiritual and motivational masters that I put into use. Even these, however, were not all available at the location both geographically and emotionally that I was at. No, what I did have is something else I continue to learn and treasure – great friends. First, when I excused myself to ‘get some fresh air’ my friend Pat, came up to me and just let me know he was there for me. Let me know that he cared and did not like to see me upset. I wrote about Pat in an earlier blog as an example of what a great man should be. On this evening he just provided yet another example. Then my good friend Bret could see through me and inquired what was wrong. Confiding in a vague way Bret first provided some verbal reassurance, but also followed it with a wonderfully supportive text.

Last, and certainly not least was my beautiful Margie. At the time we happened to be DJing a show, which for the record is not the perfect place to be overwhelmed with depressing feelings of self-doubt, she began healing me in ways only she knows how. First of all, she expressed her frustration with how I was feeling. At first blush this really didn’t seem to help at all, but as the night went on and I realized by expressing that she was actually showing me how much she thought of me and how difficult it was for her to understand how I was feeling. Then, she finished the show on her own, treating the people to her special form of DJ magic and allowing me to just take some deep breaths. When we got home she lovingly explained how she felt about me and did something that makes me love her so much. She began to use things that I teach in helping me. I recall her saying to me “You don’t like how your writing and speaking is coming along? Then change it!”. She was, of course, right. If you are depressed or frustrated with your current situation the best way to turn those feelings around is through massive action to change that situation. She also provided me some wonderful ideas to do so and pledged her commitment to be by my side through it all.

In looking back I realize there was many great blessings in this tough day. One, I was able to see the benefit of taking care of your friends and being a good friend. Two, I was able to feel the gratitude for the amazing friends and divine woman I have in my life. Finally, I was able to increase my motivation to carry my message to as many people as I can and will be announcing the first of my new seminars for 2017 soon. As a bonus I was also able to see how powerful the things we learn and share on this site work.

So if you are having a bad day, know that each has a host of blessings and to just hang in there, the light at the end of the tunnel may be you.

URBAN JOURNEY 

This post was inspired by my friend Curtis. We were discussing things we enjoy in our fine city and he mentioned his favorite place for chicken wings. Both of us being a fan of this food we exchanged ideas as to where the best ones may be found. An exchange of ideas that most of us have in one form or another several times a week. Although not necessarily with Chicken wings.

What he said next really gave me an idea. “Boy I wish I could take time off to travel the city and try all of the different chicken wings.”. The place Curtis works at is a coffee shop (not surprising I am there) They also happen to have amazing food and a super staff. The place is called ‘Urban Joe’s’. Rather a clever name I might add. So we are going to call this idea an urban journey. Plus, “Curtis’ cool idea that I am stealing and tweaking a bit to make a life enhancing idea” just doesn’t really have a flow to it.

So here is the idea in brief. Do just what we decided to above. Go for chicken wings? Well yes if that is what you like. Don’t like chicken? Maybe a vegetarian? Perhaps you are better at sticking to your healthy eating pledge than I am? Fear not this idea is bigger than chicken! Ok, most things are bigger than a chicken but I was speaking philosophically and not literally.

Here is the idea in broader terms. Pick something you like. Museums, parks, coffee shops. (If you live in West Allis Wisconsin or anywhere close I recommend Urban Joe’s and talking to Curtis). Then pick one day a month and explore all those ideas relating to your pick. You will be surprised at what you may learn about your city and yourself. I recommend picking a friend, or your loved one to do this with. Sharing adventures and both looking for places to explore together makes it even more fun.

Perhaps you could start a journal about your experiences or maybe a little scrapbook? Photo album? As the weather warms up and we spend more time outside let us do so by getting to know our cities and our neighbors!

Feel free to share your ideas for your urban journey in the comments below and please feel free to share this post with others you think may enjoy this idea!

IT’S NOT CRAZY IF IT MAKES YOU SMILE!

Ok here it is, confession time. How many times in your life have you been asked the question “What do you want to be when you grow up?”? For me it has been countless times and until quite recently I have not even known the answer. More about that in a later post.

Back to the picture above. I recall the answer to the first time I was asked this question only because those who love me will never let me forget it. I was a small child, not sure how old when I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up. Not really a master of the laws of biology I answered quite simply “I would like to be a whale.”. Thus beginning a long string of thoughts outside the box that continues to this day.

So what is the point of that little anecdote? That I was a strange child who grew up to be a strange adult? If you know me or follow this blog for any length of time that should be apparent. If this is your first time meeting me through this words let me save you some contemplation and assure you that is so. Not the point I am striving for here, however.

The point of our little story is this. Today at the Milwaukee public market, my lovely lady picked this strainer up for me. Obviously she knows the story of me wanting to become a whale. She finds it cute as she does a lot of the dopey aspects of me. One of the many reasons I love her. So she picked this up because it made her think of me and she found it cute. Why would 2 adults spend extra money on a strainer just to have a smiling whale on it? Simply put, because it makes us smile. I have a Winnie the Pooh coffee mug that says “Take an unbotherment break” on it. It reminds me to take time each day to be curious and care free like the loveable bear. I encourage you to pick out and purchase things that make you smile. If other people think you are strange? That’s ok. You will be the stranger that is always smiling!

LIFE LESSONS FROM AN EPIC PICTURE

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. This is a pretty cool picture right? What do you see? What race are the people in the picture? What are they up to? What does all of this matter anyway?

Let me share a few facts with you about the above photo and how we can put them to good use. The picture was taken by Margie, my amazing lady. It is of my friend Travis and myself. So it is a picture of two friends. Travis is African-American, I am Native American. In this picture you cannot tell that. The point this makes is that when it comes to friendship race should not matter. When I look at my friends this is a very accurate version of what I see, no attention to color.

What are we up to? This was taken backstage before what was to be my very first seminar. If you see the look of contemplation it is because we were both about to speak and were a little nervous and going through what we were about to do in our heads. What this makes me think of is that when we are along in the darkness of our own minds focusing on what we have to do, quite often we have the company and support of our friends. I recall the moments before and after this picture was taken you could hear a pin drop. Totally silent. Still, in that moment a bond was being formed and strengthened for what was to happen next.

What did happen next could not have been predicted by any of the three people there. The lady in charge of the venue had a complete meltdown and threw all of our stuff on the street. This happened even as people were beginning to show up for the seminar. It was a very stressful time. Not only did I have to focus on delivering the contents of my seminar for the very first time, but suddenly I had to find a new venue and convince and inform all of the people attending to do the same.

What happened less was nothing short of a miracle! One of the gentleman attending, Mark, owned an office building that although was a good distance away was available that very moment. He allowed us to use it, thus cementing a feeling of gratitude I still carry to this day. Both Travis and Margie pitched in to not only keep me calm, but to move everything to the new location. The folks who I was able to contact and who did attend were able to see an example of the very principles I teach in action. Something they would not have been able to see without the challenges we faced. It also was a perfect storm for my very first seminar and has allowed me to know if I made it through that the rest would be far easier.

Did I really get all of that from this one picture? Oh yes, and much more. There were funny moments of people falling of chairs and a million other memories. The point being is this one picture can motivate me so much. Is there a picture that might do the same for you? Print it out, hang in somewhere you will see everyday.

A VIDEO EVERYONE SHOULD SEE…

My latest YouTube video is something everyone should watch.  I am so grateful for the inspiration. Please click the link below to watch and feel free to share if you too are inspired. 

WATCH THE LIFE CHANGING VIDEO HERE

THE SECRET TO A PASSIONATE LIFE

Everyone wants a life filled with joy and vitality. I believe the quickest way to accomplish that is to increase your passion. How do we do that? Find a ‘why’ to your life. What does that even mean? What it means is finding a reason you want to get up in the morning. Why going through all the tough times will be worth it.

I have asked a lot of my good friends what their ‘why’ is. When asked most of them don’t know. Some give me answers such as “If I don’t I will be fired”. That is not very motivating.  Ask yourself that very question. What is it that gets you out of bed in the morning. I must confess there are days not much will get me out of bed. Still most days I have a compelling reason to put both feet on the floor and begin moving. This blog is part of it.

We all need something that stirs our soul. Usually it is something bigger than just ourselves. I am not advocating you quit your job and move to the tropics, although I must admit that thought crosses my mind several times a day. No, you don’t even have to change your career. You may eventually want to, but you can always begin chasing a dream part time. Maybe begin writing that book you have always wanted to? Start your own YouTube channel doing videos on a topic that excites you. (Mine can be found by searching Neil Panosian). There are also plenty of volunteer opportunities. My mother recently retired and will begin volunteering at our local zoo.

The point is all of us, I don’t care who you are, were born to do more than just pay bills and die. We each have a unique gift and passion to share with the world. Nelson Mandela once said “Action without vision is only passing time, Vision without action is merely dreaming, but vision with action can change the world”. I don’t care if your passion is attending state fairs. Perhaps you can recommend ways in which they can be improved. Maybe write a book about your different experiences, or create a photo book? The point is no matter what your passion is, sharing it with the world will accomplish 2 great things. One, it will bring joy and fun to countless people who share your passion and most importantly it will set your soul on fire. These are two things the world desperately needs, people sharing their passions and people living their passions. Once you start, your life will never be the same!

THE TOOLS 

A lot of people come to me telling me how they have read every book, listened to every CD attended several seminars and still their lives are in shambles. They say they know about the gratitude journal and writing down your goals and reviewing them daily. I ask if they actually tried them. Most of the time the answer is “yes”. Sometimes, however, the answer is “no”. If the answer is no then the solution is fairly obvious. If the answer is yes, I ask how long they worked with these tools. Suddenly the conversation comes to an abrupt halt or changes direction.

It amazes me when faced with a project such as building a garage for example, we choose all of the best tools. Why not? Using the best tools makes the job quick and easy. In the project of building up ourselves or our lives we tend not to look for the best tools. Sometimes we get them and don’t actually use them. Can you imagine buying the best drill and then leaving it sit on the ground as you use an old-fashioned screw driver?

What about the people who ‘try’ (a word that should be removed from the vocabulary of successful people) and then give up? Using our analogy of the garage it is like starting with the drill, and then going back to the screwdriver. “Well I didn’t see the results!” you may find yourself saying. Maybe you need a little instruction on how to use the tool or maybe a little more practice? Sticking with our building a garage metaphor, the more you use a drill the better you will become at doing it and the more efficient you will become. Just like the difference between a nail gun and a hammer. Sure both will get the job done, but one will be a lot quicker and easier. You will achieve your goal with a lot more ease and less time and energy wasted.

Here is another secret. Use the hammer until you find the nail gun. Start building your dreams as you look for and learn new tools. Take a look at your own ‘toolbox’ are there tools there you know could change your life but you haven’t put them to use? Dust them off, start putting them to work. Remember the tools only work if you do. Even a hammer will not pound a nail in unless you pick it up and put the effort in.

Feel free to share this post with anyone you think could benefit from what we learned.

THE MISSING INGREDIENT 

Have you ever cooked something and forgot an ingredient? Sometimes it is not that big of a deal.  You forgot That pinch of salt. Sure you can taste a little difference but it still tastes good. Other times it could make all the difference. Let us say you are making cherry pie and forget the cherries, big problem there. 

What i am going to share with you fits into the first category. I run into a lot of people who seem to have a missing ingredient in their lives and quest for improving themselves. I must confess as to having this problem myself for a while. See if this sounds familiar to you. Daily your life can be a struggle. You have moments of positivity, but daily it seems like a grind. You may even have a set of goals you are working towards but the path seems long and difficult. 

Fear not my friend! You are missing an ingredient. If you add this ingredient it will make whatever goal you are chasing not only easier to obtain, but you will have a lot more fun doing it. Yes, this missing ingredient is truly a game changer! Sound pretty powerful? It is, but here is what is even better, it is super easy to do. 

So let us look at your goal, what is it? Lose some of the extra pounds from the holidays? Obtain a certain position in your career? Perhaps improve and grow the love in your relationship? Whatever your goal is there is one step you should add to it and that can make all of the difference. Here is the one magic thing you can add to not only your goal list, but your daily to do list as well. It will improve the quality of your life tremendously! Have fun and enjoy the process. 

That sounds easy right? Here is why it is so vital. Most of life is a journey. If we only stop to enjoy life when we achieve a goal or arrive at a certain point we are…well…missing the point. It is the traveling there that is where we should look for the fun. 

You might be asking “what is fun about losing weight?”. A lot can be. Perhaps in your efforts you can look up and try fun new healthy recipes? Instead of going to the gym (which oddly I’m really hooked on) maybe find a sport you like or start taking walks in nature or going for bike rides with the one you love. 

Another thing to help enjoy the process is to notice and get excited about the progress and not the perfection. Stop and read that again, it is worth it. Some people will look at how much of the mountain there is left to climb and forget to look at how much they have already conquered. So you can’t fit into your jeans from high school yet, but did you notice you don’t get so winded taking the stairs? Maybe you and your spouse still argue too much, but are they being solved quicker and with less hurt?

So add the line have fun and enjoy the process to whatever goal or to do list you are currently working on.  Find ways to make the journey fun and celebrate the progress not just the perfection. You will find yourself smiling more often and when you’re enjoying yourself your goals will be easier to stick to!

Feel free to share this post with all of your friends!