Tag: Neil Panoisan

BUCKLE UP. IT IS A NEVERENDING JOURNEY 😳

It is that time of year that students are heading back to school. This could be high school, college or any other school. I hear a lot of them praying for graduation and for “It to be all over.” What many of them fail to realize, is that if we are to be successful it is never over. That is, if we wish to rise above the hoards of average individuals and live an amazing life, learning never stops. In fact, when we do graduate it is called commencement. That word, by its very definition, means “a beginning or start”.

After two decades (wow that sounds like a long time), 2060 blog posts and 3 published books, I consider myself to be a very avid student of self-improvement. Not only are there so much material to consume, there are so many teachers to learn from. When I say so many teachers, I mean they are everywhere! Not only formal teachers, like Nicci, the favorite art teacher of Margie and me, but informal teachers as well. We are actually all teachers. I learn a lot from my friend Kurt who is currently writing a great book I can’t wait to share with all of you. I learn from my friend Nick who is a great student of life himself. Even thousands of miles away, I learn from my friend Eduardo in Italy. He has such a unique and amazing way of interpreting what I write. There are even people who teach us through their mistakes and bad behavior. I can’t count the times I have witnessed someone treat an employee rudely and am reminded how important it is to show these people appreciation.

Even some of the more negative aspects of life can be great teachers. The news, seldom inspiring, will show us what is wrong in the world. This is a great teacher of what we need to do to change the world. Life’s challenges are great teachers. They allow us to learn new ways to develop strength and prepare for things we never knew we had to prepare for! Our mistakes, as painful as they can be at times, are great teachers. They show us areas in our life that we may need to change and improve in. Those people who say and do things that anger and hurt others and boldly proclaim, “That’s just who I am. I am not changing for anybody.” Those are people who are not developing and learning. I don’t think there is a decent person alive who really wants to hurt others. Maybe it involves communicating better. It could be fostering a better understanding between the two parties.

Remember the meaning of the word ‘commencement’ and that leaving school is just the beginning of our education. Look around at your life and notice and appreciate all of the teachers that you have.

THERE IS STRENGTH IN YOUR STORY ✍️

This is a picture my friend Phil Posted. What a great message it has on the cup. I advocate surrounding yourself with as many positive and encouraging messages as you can. This may seem hokey to some, but it really is just balancing the scales. After all, the world today exposes us to many negative messages. There are positive ones too, but they don’t seem to get as much press. Sometimes, you just have to supply your own. It is even better if you are friends with someone amazing like Phil, who will help you by posting a positive picture such as this one.

As an author, this has an even greater message to me. That is one that I do my best to tell everyone, and now I am tell you, the dear reader. That is simply what is says on the cup – there is strength in your story. It amazes me how many people think that their life has nothing to offer the world. Nothing could be further from the truth! Maybe you are a single mother who is barely making it paycheck to paycheck. Do you know how many other single mothers you could inspire and give hope and a sense of community to by sharing your story? Are you someone living with a disability? A recovering addict? A struggling addict? A school teacher? A kid who is being bullied? Sharing our stories helps us create a greater sense of community in the global neighborhood we live in.

That last line may sound a little bit like Mr. Rogers, but that is ok. I happen to be a big Mr. Rogers fan. I think he would agree that each one of us has strength in our life story. Even if your life appears to be a total dumpster fire at the moment and you are barely hanging on day to day. That, my friend, can inspire others.

I recall a couple of gentleman I used to have the honor of serving at the meal program I volunteered at. I remember one fellow lost all of his teeth and had someone steal what few belongings he had. “How do you carry on?” I inquired. He pointed at the other gentleman he came in with. This man was a homeless vet who had lost his leg in war. He could not afford proper health care or even a decent set of crutches. “If he can keep getting up every day, then so can I.” The first man informed me. Even this man who was homeless, had lost his leg and could not afford a pair of crutches was inspiring others. How? Just by getting up to face every day. How many ways to you think sharing your story, in whatever form you choose, could inspire someone who truly needs it?

DON’T FORGET TO SET YOUR ALARM! ⏰️

I am constantly learning and being reminded of things to improve my life. Here is such a story. While organizing some of my things, I came across an item that both reminded me of something important, and gave me a new idea to write about. Before we get to the item I found, let me tell you a little bit about the idea and how they relate to each other.

One of the great things about living in the world we do, is that there is an app for just about everything. It also happens to be a little bit of a curse. I can’t begin to tell you how many I have on my phone, but it is a lot. There is an app for each gym I go to. The app for the fitbit that measures my fitness level while I am there. Starbucks to help me earn free coffee while I write these blogs. There are countless others, but I am sure you get the idea. People are often looking for the one app that will transform their lives. There are a lot of good apps that I recommend including to take a little stress out of the job of turning your life around.

Here is a screen shot of some of the apps on my phone. I use one to do my podcasts, there is one for motivational speeches I can listen to, even with a dark screen. There is even an app that sends me motivational quotes everyday! All of these apps, and more can assist you in living a more rewarding life. You can download a fitness app. You can get one that reminds you to drink more water. One that sends you the weather with a picture of a puppy. There are countless ones to make your day, and by result your life, better. Still, there is one that everyone has, that almost everyone overlooks – the alarm clock. That’s right, the good old alarm clock. The very thing that goes off every morning at 4am to remind me how much the United States Postal Service would love my company. On your phone, you can customize your alarm. You can pick a song or sound that would be the least painful to wake up to. You can even type something for your phone to say to you. This is kind of creepy, but fun. This is only scratching the surface. There is a bigger and better way to use the alarm clock to radically improve your life.

Now back to the thing that I found. I bet you forgot about that, didn’t you? I almost did and I am the one telling the story. I came across a copy of the book 3 Alarms by Eric Partaker. I read this some time ago and learned a great idea I would like to share with you. In this book, Mr. Partaker uses his alarm clock to remind himself of some very important roles he plays in his life. In fact, he used it to remind himself of what is truly important in life. I will give you the idea in a nutshell, but I HIGHLY recommend you get the book to receive the full benefit. Every day he sets 3 alarms on his phone. One to remind him to be the healthiest version of himself. One to focus on his career and lastly, one to focus on his relationships.

This is great for several reasons. The main one is that even the greatest intentions can be forgotten in a busy world. Like say this awesome book you read that you only recently found while organizing your home office. If daily your alarm clock would go off with a simple message of “Don’t forget to be the healthiest version of yourself.” and at that very moment, you are reminded of your goals to get both a smaller waistline and lower medical bills, what would that be worth to you? How about one that says “Remember to be the best spouse you can.” If it goes off on the way home, you might be tempted to swing by and pick up a surprise bunch of flowers. If it goes off in the middle of the work day, it might prompt an unprovoked loving text. Can you see how powerful this method is? Again, please get the book. I am only scratching the surface of how this can be used. You will be amazed by Eric Partaker’s story as well and the genius ways he uses a simple alarm clock to bring radical positive transformation to his life and how you can too.

As an added bonus, I suggest picking a time that is meaningful to you. It could be the time you were born. Not sure when that was for me. Even something like 11:11 or 3:33. The first picture is 12:34, which Margie and I use to celebrate…well…each other. It is an alarm clock of sorts. It reminds us to take a second out of our busy day to send each other love, if we can, or at the very least celebrate our love. What ways can you think of using the alarm clock on your phone to change your life?

DON’T JUST READ ME, LISTEN TO ME! 🎧

I am so grateful for all of you who have been following this blog. We have been sharing tools and strategies to turn the life we have into the life we love for over ten years now. We are a self-improvement family that includes individuals in over 200 countries and are on all 7 continents! My heart is so filled with gratitude for this community and only strengthens my desire to provide content that will serve you all.

I am always asking in what ways can I further serve? The answer was brought to me by several of you. It really hit home when that included the lovely lady I share my home with. Many people enjoy the content we share with each other here, but may not have the time, or desire, to sit down and read. Therefore, we have started….Living the Dream with Neil Panosian podcast! It can be found wherever you stream your content. This includes me reading and discussing posts we have on this blog as well as sections from my three books. We also have special guests to share their opinions. I would love to have you all subscribe. You can take me with you when you are at the gym, going for that walk after dinner, driving in the car or whenever else you listen to podcasts. There are episodes that range in time from 10 minutes to a half an hour. They fit whatever time you have allowed.

Listen to and subscribe to the LIVING THE DREAM WITH NEIL PANOSIAN podcast today. I look forward to your feedback and being able to serve all of you in a new form of media. I would love to expand the podcast (currently followed in 10 countries) to all 200 who follow Secret2anamazinglife.com. I look forward to meeting all of you there.

MAKE SURE THEY MATCH 🔥

Last post we talked about celebrating the hard-working people. This post reminds us of a very important reason we do so. Actions always speak louder than words. We all know people who seem to constantly be talking a good game. They are going to start that business, they have that million-dollar idea that will change the world. Where do we find them a year from now? Right back where they were. Usually, we also find them saying the same things they were promising a year ago. The second time we hear it, we are always filled with a little less excitement, and a lot less expectation that they will follow through.

Those people sure can be annoying can’t they? Here is a shocking little truth. Aren’t we all quite often one of those people? “Oh not me!” I can hear you say. Still, once a year, usually around January 1st, we hear people say things like, “I have to start eating better.” or “I am really going to start working out.” When summer comes, where to we find them? Sitting on the couch with a remote in one hand and a doughnut in the other. I know. Temptation can be a hard one to overcome. In a busy world it is all too easy to choose the quick cheap option over the healthier, more involved option. It is far easier to spend $5 on a combo meal in the drive thru on the way home, then to go home, wash up some vegetables and make a salad. Even making ourselves some healthier burgers at home could take a good half hour. In which time we could have already thrown away our wrapper from our ‘not so happy meal’.

The cost of these decisions is far greater than the health aspect. It devalues something in addition to our heart health and waistline. It cheapens our words. When people hear us tell them we are going to start living healthier and six months from now we are buying the next size up, we look foolish. In fact, we may come across as being dishonest, or at least disingenuous. Do you know what is worse? There is someone else who is listening that values our words less and less. That person is the one who looks back at you in the mirror. When we do not keep our promises to ourselves, we feel consistently miserable and like a failure. What is equally terrible is we cease to even believe ourselves. When we declare that we are going to start living a healthier lifestyle, our declaration falls on deaf ears. This is true even if we are the only ones in the room.

To overcome this, realize a few things. When you say you are going to do something, create measurable goals to reach along the way. Write down your declaration on a piece of paper and place it where you will see it several times a day. Imagine you are a famous person being followed by the paparazzi and they are documenting your actions. Whatever it will take to help you stick to your goal. Hypothetically, let us say you slip up and eat some mini doughnuts at the farmers market you were at. What then? Put that extra time in at the gym. Make sure you eat a healthy dinner. Oddly enough, it may be healthy to give yourself a little pain. Feel bad about breaking your word. Remember, it is not as important what others think, but what the person between your own two ears thinks.

What words of yours cheapened by your actions? How can you correct this? We could all use a little help when it comes to this, so feel free to leave your suggestions below.

CELEBRATE LABOR 👷‍♀️👩‍🏭

In both the United States and Canada, we celebrate Labor Day. It is a day that recognizes all of the hard-working people and the hours they put in. I encourage you to take today to celebrate all of the hard work you have put in. Not only in the office, but on those goals and that passion project that means so much to you. Haven’t put in the amount of hours on that you might have wanted to? That’s ok too. Just realize how much better you will feel next year when you look back and see how much further you have come.

One of the best ways to celebrate all of our hard work is to take a well-deserved break. Use it to reconnect with those you love. Use it to practice some self-care. Include a good amount of gratitude for all of the rights we have as workers. This is not the dark ages where you could be physically punished for not doing your job correctly. Also, realize there is a lot of work to be done around the globe. There are many who do not enjoy the labor standards we celebrate here in the industrialized world.

We enjoy readers and contributors from across the globe here at secret2anamazinglife.com. Each country has its own standards when it comes to labor standards. With readers from Brazil to Uganda, I would love to hear about how each of you celebrate the common worker. It is always a joy to connect with all of our family calling this planet home.

SIT WITH THE WARRIORS

This simple quote brings a lot to mind. Sitting with warriors could conjure up an image of men with swords and shields. It can bring to mind soldiers ready to go to battle. In the case of daily life, I think it means something entirely different. Warriors in life can be people just like you and me. They are people who battle every day with both the challenges the world throws at them, but also the demons contained within them. They are people who are often down, but never out. Do you know people like this? People who keep going no matter how tough the going seems to get? These are the people you want to surround yourself with.

Much like the importance of surrounding yourself with positive oriented people, which we have often discussed here, including the warriors of daily life in your social circle is essential. Why? Not only will you gain a large amount of inspiration from them, but you will also learn some of the tools and strategies, plus, the psychology they use to meet and overcome these challenges. It is important to include those people we wish to be more like in our daily lives. People who never give up have a different way of looking at, and talking about the world. Anytime you are able, you should sit with them.

HOW TO AVOID THE DANGER FACING EVERY RELATIONSHIP AND FALL MORE IN LOVE THAN EVER BEFORE! ❤️

Your relationship is in danger! This includes not only friendships, but most importantly your intimate relationship. In fact, this is the one that may be in the greatest danger. What is the giant threat facing your relationship? Before we get to that – a warning. This threat may seem like not such a big deal. Trust me it is. If you value any, or all, of your relationships, take notice of what we are going to talk about today. More important than taking notice, is taking action. If you do, you will not only neutralize this dangerous threat, you will deepen your relationships and fall more in love than ever before. This is true whether that love is romantic or platonic.

The threat facing all relationships, be they friend or lover, is society’s tendency to focus on what is wrong with someone or something. I cannot recall how many times at work I see people gathered around complaining about they person they are in a relationship with. If someone doesn’t add to the conversation, they are looked at as a little odd. I never understood this. Why would you want the person you are with look anything less than beyond perfect? By making them look bad, what does that say about you? Here is the true danger – it gives others something to remind you of and to add to. If you want success in your relationship, share as much of what is right, and none of what is wrong. This holds true double for social media. Raise your hand if you know a couple that is constantly breaking up and falling in love online? Same two people. Depending on the day, they are either convincing you the other is the bottom of humanity, or they are the reason they get up in the morning. Do you know how that makes the two of you look? Like a couple of clowns.

Another thing that sharing negative information about friends, or worse the person you love, does is give others ammunition. There are always people who wish to break up friendships and relationships. Maybe they are jealous of your happiness? Maybe they want the friend or spouse you have? Whatever their motive, sharing your problems or negative thoughts gives them something to work with. They can either take that information and spread it to others, often including the person you were discussing, causing a further rift in the relationship. They can also remind you of these negative thoughts. A somewhat innocent comment like, “I know things seem good now, but remember when they did ___ to you?” This can put a limit to the amount of joy you can experience with someone and increase the negative feelings in a relationship.

The cure to this is really quite simple. Share as much wonderful things about your friends and those you love with as many people as you can. This will not only prevent them from finding a crack in your friendship and relationship to take advantage of, but it will also strengthen your feelings for that other person by reminding yourself of all the wonderful things about them you may have forgot. It will also have you looking a lot better in the eyes of others. Who wants to be friends with someone who is constantly speaking negative about people, or discussing problems they have with them? What do you think will happen as soon as you are not around? No, instead share the love. If it gets back to them, they will be quite impressed. If it doesn’t, it will still lead to an increase in the positive feelings you have for this person. Either way, it will strengthen the relationship and prevent the ever lurking danger from harming it. Speak love, feel love. What is something you find amazing about one of your friends or the person you love?

CHANGE THE CONVERSATION 🗣

Last post we discussed the magic we can create in our lives when we return the childhood act of finding the beauty that is all around us. If you haven’t read that, I highly suggest you do. When we are starting to make note of all the beautiful things that we might be missing in life, it can be helpful to at least start the habit alone. Once you see how much happier you are and how much more energy you have you will want to share this with everyone you care about! It would even help, sometimes to a greater extent, those people you find it difficult to be around. That is exactly what we are going to suggest you do in this post!

As tempting as sharing your new way of going through life may be, I suggest waiting for a little bit. The reason being, that some people could resist change, especially before they see the result. What is more amusing, I speak from personal experience, is to interject some of the beautiful things you have seen into your conversations with this person. When they are filling you will information about the latest violent crime or political happenings, just throw in the anecdote about how you had a nice saying written on your coffee cup you picked up in the drive thru or about a particularly charming garden you happen to see as you were driving. Initially, these may be swept aside after a brief acknowledgement. That’s to be expected. Many people do not know, and often feel uncomfortable, carrying on a positive conversation.

This may seem deflating initially. Especially in the beginning. Remember, these people have been programed, as we all have, to notice and concentrate on the negative in life. Do not be discouraged. Notice it, have an inward chuckle, and share a little bit more of the beauty you have discovered. Slowly, maybe after several meetings, they will stop resisting the positive elements you bring to the conversation. They may even feel compelled to share one of their own. They may realize, “I am meeting Neil for coffee today. I know he will have some positive thing to share. I guess I better have something to share as well.” Before you know it, they may even bring up positive elements to discuss. In this way, they will be helping you to remember to continue to focus on the beauty and magic in life.

There is one more very important reason to develop this habit of positive conversation. That reason is that adding positivity to anyone’s life, could literally be a lifesaver! We never know how our interactions can affect someone’s life. Let us make sure that they are positive ones. Sharing one more depressing news item, or one negative thing about the world at large, can push someone over the edge. The opposite is also true. Adding some positive conversation or some beauty and magic to someone’s life may change their entire day. It may also save their life if they are on that edge. Something we may often never know. Why take that chance? Make sure what you share with the world, and those it, is positive. The best way to do that? Use the tips discussed in this, and the post before it, to transform your life to one of beauty and magic!

NEVER STOP DOING THIS! ✋️

One of the saddest things that seems to happen as we age is that we lose an appreciation for the magic and beauty of life. It is no surprise. When we are young, most of the things we are exposed to offer an encouraging motif. Think of children’s programing. Most of it is a blend of encouragement of teaching and encouraging. I recall shows like Sesame Street and Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood when I was young. I learned a lot, but there were also positive messages about myself, others and the world around me.

What happens as we get older? What we are exposed to takes a decidedly negative shift. News, crime shows, content on the internet and even that sent to our phones. Is the answer to stop using technology? Limiting our use of it may help somewhat, but that will not save us from interacting with other people. What are these other people exposed to? That’s right. The same negative influences we just mentioned. If you even attempt to be a light in this dark world, you will often be looked at as strange, weird or delusional. People will tell you things such as “You are looking at the world through rose-colored glasses.” or my favorite, “You just have your head in the sand. Can’t you see how bad the world is?”

What can we do to remedy this malady? Start doing something we may have stopped doing in childhood. That is looking for the beauty and magic that is all around us! It may not get the press and attention, but it is there. On social media, try subscribing to positive news stories and motivational pages. On your cell phone, download apps that send you motivational quotes everyday. These things really do exist! As for the sunshine-challenged people we share the planet with? Know most of them have just lost their ability to see the magic all around them. When they give you a crazy look or attack you, pity them. There life is one stuck in the darkness. In addition, add people who have the opposite mindset. Spend as much time around them as possible!

When you are looking to improve your life, it is always easer to add the positive than to eliminate the negative. You might want to read that line again. If you are trying to eat healthier, it would be easier to add a healthy meal than to starve yourself of meals that are not so healthy. The more you fill up on healthy food, the less room you will have for junk food. The same is true with everything in life. The more time you spend reading or listening to something inspiring is that much less time you could find yourself exposed to negativity. Adding smiles? Less time frowning. One minute of laughter? 60 seconds less of anger!

In regards to today’s post, spend more time actively looking for beautiful things in life. The more time you spend doing so, the less time you will spend noticing and dwelling on the negative. That doesn’t mean you are ‘burying your head in the sand’ and pretending they don’t exist. No, you are simply choosing not to dwell on them. As an example, above is my coffee as it was served to me at the pick up window at Starbucks. Not sure which employee took the time to do this, but it added a little brightness to my day. As I was in that sunny mood, I noticed the dandelion growing through a crack in the pavement right next to a dumpster. Proof that there is always a little light in the darkness. When we are children, we don’t have to look for the magic. It seems to show up at every turn. As adults, we need to train ourselves to get back to that. This may mean a little concentrated effort searching for the beauty in life. Done enough, it will start to show up in your life everywhere.

Another great idea is to keep images around you that remind you of the beauty you have and are currently experiencing in your own life. Above is a sample of mine. Great times with the beautiful love of my life, Margie. My mom celebrating Octoberfest. There is fun times watching a pig race at the Wisconsin State Fair and a very beautiful and loving sentiment that Margie wrote in the sand while we were enjoying time away in Jamaica. This not only reminds me of the beauty and magic in my life, it adds what could be the most powerful thing to create an amazing life. That one thing is gratitude. How could I not be grateful for all of these things? Being grateful and looking for all the beauty that is around us will positively transform our lives. Next post we will learn how to take all of this information and not only help others transform their lives, but create an almost automatic way to fill our lives with these things! Please come back tomorrow to learn all of that!