Everyone would love a bonus day in their lives, wouldn’t they? How many times do you look around at everything you have to do in life and wish you just had a few more hours in they day? For most of us, that is daily. Here is a trick question. If you did have a bonus day, what would you spend it focused on? Would it be accomplishing more? Would it be resting more? Would it be focused on just doing nothing? How about focusing on joy? On bliss?
Today is leap year. It has many of us thinking of a bonus day. That is not exactly how it is, but you get the idea. Here is a fact that we often overlook. Every day is a bonus day. There are so many things that could go sideways in life and in the world that every day we enjoy with those we love is a bonus day. This may sound metaphorical, but it is not. Who is to say who will be here tomorrow and who will not. Today we are, let us make the most of it. This will mean different things to different people. Maybe completing that household chore you have been working on forever will give you joy? Then, put some time in. Maybe you need to slow down and just enjoy a little time for yourself. Don’t feel guilty, just do that.
Let leap year serve as a reminder to us that every day is a bonus day. We are not promised tomorrow, but we have been given today. Let us make the most of this beautiful bonus day!
Here is an important idea to remember. Things will be okay. This can be hard to accept or believe when we are facing difficult times. There are a million challenges that come to mind that can really try our resolve. Can you think of ones in your past that fit this description? For me, there are several that come to mind. My open-heart surgery and following trip to the hospital. People we care deeply for passing away. Car accidents, job losses. We have all had our share of very serious challenges, have we not?
Here is something to consider, you are reading this. Whatever challenge tried, and may have succeeded, in knocking you down, you are still here. Your record for facing challenges and to keep moving forward is 100%. We all have scars, we may have some pain, be it physical or emotional, that we carry with us, but we are here. That pain, and those challenges, often allow us to better relate to and comfort others going through something similar. It can give us a good story to share with and help inspire others. It can give us motivation that we have overcome a challenge. Eventually, and it may take a good amount of time, everything will be okay. Know that. Trust in that.
As I write this, it is my first day back from vacation. By the time you read this, it will be my first day back at work after vacation. If you would like to say a small prayer for me, that certainly would be fine. In all seriousness, there is always some interesting adjustments when you return. The idea you will not wake up to a nice space cleaned by someone else, that is disheartening. The fact nobody has cut up a buffet of fruit for you to choose from, or put out a wide selection of food to enjoy and you actually have to cook yourself, that is a little disappointing.
The real challenge, and the one that jumpstarted my writing career, is how to maintain that vacation mentality once you have returned to the working world. One of the reasons that this became my life mission, that is to discover how we can live a life that feels like a vacation, is due to a song lyric by the band Kiss. It is from the song Lick it Up. The lyric reads like this – “Don’t need to wait for an invitation/ you have to live like you’re on vacation.” It made me ponder how that was possible. How does one live like they are on vacation? After all, we all have jobs we have to go to in order to keep the lights on and a roof over our heads.
One of the ways we can move closer to this, is to establish what is different from a mentality standpoint between the two situations. Personally, one of the biggest is the lack of concern over responsibilities. You are not focused on paying the bills, cleaning the house or any other requirement you might have in your life. The other is the constant enjoyment over all of the food, drink, and people around you. It is the soaking in of the atmosphere. The ocean breeze, the sun, the palm trees, the scent of coconut from the sunscreen and the cocktails. Hard to have all of this when you are sitting in a cubicle, under florescent lights, smelling Bob in the cubicle next to you. Well, I am going to provide two little tricks I use that help me live my life like a vacation, no matter how Bob smells that day.
The first is something we talk about over and over on this site – gratitude. How can gratitude make you feel like you are living a vacation? Have you ever noticed how people who undergo a near death experience seem to enjoy life so much more? It is as if they got a peak at how precious and priceless life is that the rest of us take for granted. I certainly don’t advise putting yourself in a situation to have a near death experience. What I can tell you is to really appreciate what you have. Seeing people facing intense health challenges, or extreme financial challenges, can make us appreciate the fact we just have a cold or that we might be behind on one bill, verses something that could be so much worse. There are quite a few places in the world where war and political corruption have made the thought of just ‘having’ to wake up and go to work, a dream for many. If that seems like a stretch, to be grateful for things you dread, combine it with our second tool for living a life of vacation.
This tip can be a little bit of work, but it is fun work. Think of what comprises your ultimate vacation, and how you can get a little bit of that at home. Using the above example of a beach vacation, how can you create your own right at home? I live in Wisconsin where it is normally cold and gloomy. Therefore, I have a few little tools that help me go on a mini mental vacation. I have a ‘happy lamp’. It mimics sunlight and helps you feel uplifted. I have coconut essential oils that can be put in a diffuser, put in a bath or used in many other ways. I have tracks of ocean waves that I can close my eyes and listen to. I have tropical music channel I listen to. This engages many of the senses. Margie also makes a delicious jerk chicken! Create the atmosphere that feels like vacation.
Here is a little bonus item you can use as well. Start a vacation fund. Even if you can only deposit 5 dollars a week into it. Watch it build and know that you are getting ever closer. Investigate what places interest you. Maybe get brochures, or look at their website. You could buy a new swimsuit while you are waiting, or get your passport. Whatever little things will help the dream feel closer.
When you live a life that feels like a vacation, you help others do the same. Yes, we all might have to go to a job that doesn’t speak to our soul, but we can still have a life that makes our soul sing! Be grateful, surround yourself with the idea of vacation and give yourself something to look forward to by starting to save. You deserve a life that feels like a vacation. It is not as difficult as you may think.
Are you like me, one of those people who really like to get someone the perfect gift? Not necessarily the most expensive or lavish gift, but one that will be most appreciated. Do you spend countless hours thinking about what you know of the person and then combining that with what gift would fit that knowledge? It can be stressful and exhausting. This post will help relieve some of that stress and give you a gift that will be treasured by anyone you want to feel special. How can we do that without knowing the first thing about the person you are giving the gift to? By giving you a gift that is universally loved, extremely rare, and although it does not cost much from a financial aspect, it is priceless. Care to know what it is? Read on my friends.
As you read this, I will be on my way to this amazing location. It is the Warkwick Paradise Island, in the Bahamas. It was a gift to my lovely lady for her birthday. That is not the amazing present I am speaking of. Not sure about you, but I could not afford a trip to the Bahamas for everyone I know. Although it would probably be received quite well by most, it would not be universal as some strange people do not like the Caribbean. This means I am going to give you a gift that is not only enjoyed by more people than a trip to the Bahamas, but it more rare and priceless these days. Fear not, it is one you can afford. It comes at a cost, but not one in dollar terms.
The present I am talking about is just that…being present! Giving your attention to someone. Actively listening to what they say. That is listening to learn and understand and not just to reply. Does this sound like something that isn’t that special? Next time you are out anywhere take a look at the people around you. How many of them are locked in eye contact, soaking in every word the person opposite them is sharing? How many of them are not even looking at that person, and are instead staring at the device in their hand? Care to put a percentage on those?
This post is not to sound cynical, but to prove how rare and special being truly present for someone is. Distractions are everywhere. Using our devices and social media has shortened our attention span to one slightly longer than that of a squirrel. Stealing the love of my life away from our chaotic life to one of tranquil paradise will mean little if we are not giving each other our time. That gift is one that everyone appreciates. Knowing what you have to say is important to the other party, in fact knowing you are important to the other party, is something that will be appreciated by everyone. We all deserve this, but it is a gift that is becoming harder to find. I invite you to be the giver of this great gift.
Whether it is for a birthday, anniversary or just because you want them to feel special, give the gift of your presence. Not your physical presence, but your mind, body and soul to the moments you are spending with that individual. Not only will it be a great gift in the moment, it will strengthen your relationships and give you knowledge you can use to provide other great gifts in the future. The more you know, the more impactful in their lives you can be.
It is the weekend, should we still be keeping self-improvement in mind? Fair question. Let me ask you this, which areas of your life would you like to improve? A lot of people view self-improvement as ‘fixing what is wrong with you’. That could not be further from the truth! It is, as the term states, improving yourself. Every area of our lives can always be improved. In my life I try to remain both happy and unsatisfied. I suggest you take that philosophy as well.
Take for example my relationship with this beautiful lady. Am I happy with it? For sure! Just the other morning she even had a cup of coffee waiting for me when I woke up! If that isn’t love, I do not know what is. Am I satisfied with it? Not in the slightest! There are so many ways in which we can improve our relationship. Our love, as fabulous as it is, can always be deeper and further reaching. Finding new ways to love the person you are with is the key to keeping a relationship fresh and loving.Our communication is the key to success, as it is in any relationship. The better that gets, the better the relationship will become.
There are 2 steps to taking your life to the next level. The first, as our first photo shows, is to wake up with a goal. If you do not know the purpose for getting out of bed, you likely will not achieve it. If your purpose is to work, pay bills and die, you will not live a very inspired life. Maybe you start the day with no purpose and just let the day ‘happen to you’. This is even worse! You will not live a very inspired or fulfilling life. You must have a purpose bigger than yourself. That goal can be ‘discovering more ways to add joy to your life and that of others’. It can be ‘finding new ways to love and show love in your relationships’, as we discussed above. Goals do not have to be about fixing something. They can be about taking something that is already great and taking it to the next level!
The second is to wake up with positive energy. Before you think this is impossible, let me assure you it is not. I get up at 4am Monday through Saturday. I also DJ until 1am on Sunday which makes a very short sleep opportunity. If there is anyone who might find waking up with joy a challenge it is the fellow writing this post. The key is setting up and taking control of your life. This means, having positive influences ready before you make it out the door. The outside world has plenty of interactions that are beyond our control, and many of them may not be that pleasant. That is why we must determine our day and not leave it up to chance. There are so many ways this can be accomplished. I will share a few of mine, and would love it if you would share any you have. The more we all have, the more likely our day is to be positive. I have a motivational day by day calendar. Each day it has a saying that will start your day with a positive thought. I have an app on my phone that sends motivational quotes. Each day I get a message that is motivational. How awesome is that? In addition, I fill my social media feed with as many positive sources as I can. These are just a few of the things you can do.
This weekend, set your days up to be successful! Find that purpose, or reason to get out of bed. Surround yourself with positive influences to affect your energy before the world has a chance to affect it. Do these simple 2 steps and your life will reach new levels! Don’t forget to share what you do to positively influence your energy every day.
It is Friday, and it seems like we have been waiting forever for the weekend. What we should have been doing is preparing for it. What do I mean by that? When you find yourself in any situation where you are waiting for a goal, be that the weekend or a business of your own, use that time to prepare for its arrival. The weekend, for example, can often seem fleeting. Preparing to squeeze as much joy and life out of those 48 hours can make it that much mor enjoyable.
This doesn’t mean that you have to account for each and every second of time. That can often take some of the joy away from that time. What you can do is look forward to ever moment you get to spend. Find ways to be present. This is a key to slowing time down. We will dive deeper into that in a future post. Know that if you are too busy looking forward to the next thing, you will fail to fully appreciate the current thing. It can be a fine balance to walk, but one that makes all of the difference.
Often, the longer you have to prepare, the more amazing the goal is when you finally achieve it. It may allow something to occur to you that you had not thought of. It may allow you to be able to soak in and appreciate your accomplishment more than you would have if you had not had the time to prepare.
Does this really make that big of a difference? It just reminded me of a quick story I would like to share with you. It involves Rodney Dangerfield, who was one of the most popular comics of the 1980’s. He was in movies, on talk shows and performed in front of sold out crowds. He even owned his own night club. It was at this night club where our story takes place. Norm Macdonald, another comic was performing there when Rodney walked in. The crowd went so crazy, that Rodney had to tell of few jokes in the middle of Norm’s set to appease the crowd. After the night was over and the club was closing up, Norm approached Rodney who was having a cocktail at the bar. “Wow, you sure are popular. It must feel great to be so loved and successful.” Norm said. Rodney looked at him, slammed his drink and replied, “No, it sucks. It should have happened years ago.” Here is a man who was wildly successful but couldn’t enjoy it because it happened too late for his liking. Rodney died still bitter his success came too late instead of elated it came. He viewed the wait as a punishment and it ruined his entire life. Do not let that happen to you.
It is Thursday, how is the week treating you? Often, it is at this point, we really could use the weekend to come a day earlier. No matter the day, life can have its tough times. What can we do when we feel overwhelmed? My advice, when facing a problem that either seems insurmountable or that you have no control over, is to help someone else with their problems. This was brought home to me in my own life. The story is relayed in my second book, Living the Dream. In short, when facing one of the darkest periods of my life, I was inspired and found my purpose while serving the under-privileged at a meal program.
I often found this a difficult concept to articulate. How can adding someone else’s problems to your already overwhelmed life do you any good? It seems counterintuitive. Like many things in life, it seems that way, but really is the key to success. I think the quote above about helping someone climb a mountain is a great illustration. Not only will you arrive at the top of the mountain as well. After all, how could you help someone climb a mountain, if you were not there with them? It will also allow you both to get there quicker and with a far greater chance at success than if either of you did it alone.
There are so many examples I see in my own life. I enjoy helping other authors and invariably learn something from them. Also, working together, we seem to reach a far greater audience. At the gym, I see people helping each other out with both workout and diet tips. One of the greatest ways to help one another is to share a smile. There can be so much negativity that we are exposed to in today’s world that having someone share a genuine smile with you can make a huge difference. Just like the mountain example, the more people you share smiles with, the more likely you are to get smiles thrown back your way. Can you imagine a day where everyone went around smiling at each other? Such a simple thing, but it would make such a huge difference.
This week, today, go out and help someone climb that mountain! Share that inspiration. Lend a helping hand where you can. Not only will you help so many people reach the top of the mountains they are striving to climb, but you will enjoy the view from so many different peaks as well!
Today is Valentine’s Day, so you know I have to talk about the love of my life, the beautiful Margie. When I read the quote above, I found it to be perfect. Love, at least the kind I am luck enough to have, is nothing short of magic. Forget about pulling a rabbit out of a hat! How about pulling the best version of me out of myself? That is an amazing magic trick! How about the ability to look beautiful in every picture! This is true if she has just woken up, she is being silly, or she is dressed up to go out. Always beautiful
Although I do love every curve on her beautiful figure, my favorite is definitely her smile. She has the most beautiful smile that can at once brighten your day and melt your heart. Knowing that I play a role in placing it there is one of the greatest rewards I experience in life. Still, just knowing her heart is happy, no matter what the reason, puts mine at peace. We make each other laugh more than most couples, and genuinely enjoy doing it. We also do not do it at the expense of each other, which seems to be a common malady these days. Giving each other the gift of humor to help each other make it through life is priceless.
Last post, I mentioned all of the gifts I received from my mother. This man is lucky enough to have two angels in his life. Margie, from the start, has pushed me outside of my comfort zone. My first book, A Happy Life for Busy People, has sold roughly 5000 copies. If it were not for her pushing me from the beginning, that number might be 5. Even promoting this blog and starting the Living the Dream with Neil Panosian podcast, which you can stream just about anywhere, was in large part due to her encouragement and persistence.
She also brings the gift of her creativity to my life. For those of you who have read my second book, Living the Dream, you know that she took time out of her busy schedule to write the foreword. The gifts and love that she shares with me continues to grow every day. As we celebrate Valentine’s Day, we are going to the movies, which she loves, but we are seeing the new Bob Marley movie. She knows that I am a huge fan of the man and his music, so that is where we are going. This is what makes our love work so well.
You should certainly celebrate your love each and every day, but it does not hurt to take a day out of our busy, hectic lives to center that focus on each other. I would love to hear what you do to check in and make sure the focus stays on your partner and keeping your love healthy and happy.
Today is a very special day here at Secret2anamazinglife.com. If it were not for today, this site would not exist. Today is my mother’s birthday. That is a picture of my mother and I a few years ago. Throughout the years we have had many excursions together.We have explored different countries, and more recently, different settings of local natural beauty to explore. We enjoy learning different things together and often attend classes. We even belong to the same co-op in an attempt at healthy and sustainable living.
There are many fabulous traits that I have picked up from my mother. My generally optimistic attitude, the way I find treating people with dignity and respect almost effortless. It brings to mind a story I often share. When I was young, my mother did not drive. We took the bus a lot when we had to get somewhere. In an attempt to amuse and keep her children from misbehaving, I recall her quizzing us on words with help of the Reader’s Digest magazine. Do they still print that? That, no doubt, contributed to my rather large vocabulary. Growing up with a larger than average lexicon not only allowed me to craft entertaining and informative blog posts, but assisted me in putting my feelings into words. That is a skill worth it’s weight in gold.
Whether it is exploring different countries or local parks, learning new words while traveling on a bus, feeding a sea lion a fish, or just enjoying great conversation over a good cup of coffee, I always learn a lot from my mom. She encourages me, both in my writing and in my life. She holds me accountable, both in the gym…and in life. She is always teaching me lessons. Most of all she is always giving me more reasons to love her. Please join me in wishing the mother of both me and Secret2anamazinglife.com a healthy, happy and loving birthday!
It is Monday! Depending on what time of day you are reading this, you may be dreading going to to work to start a long week away from the family, or coming back in exhausted after the first day back over the weekend. This can have you asking if this is all there is to life. Certainly, life has to be more than just waking up, paying bills and feeling tired! You are right. That is why we all need a new job. Don’t worry, you do not have to quit the job you have. That’s right, it is another job. Before you stop reading because you think I have completely lost my mind, let me explain. I think you might be up for this one.
I believe it was Les Brown who said “At a job they pay you just enough that you won’t quit and you work just enough that they will not fire you.” This seems to be true for a lot of people. Life can feel like a job. What is the most popular abbreviation for those 3 letters? Most of us have heard a J.O.B. referred to as “Just Over Broke.” In many cases, this is sad but true. In your life, we are going to change that.
Starting today, J.O.B. will mean something entirely different and it is your ‘job’ to make it a reality. That is ‘joy of being’. If we can work half as much at finding joy in our lives as we do to pay the bills, we will become richer than we have ever been! After all, the reason we go to work is to pay for things to bring us joy. Even things as simple as keeping the lights on and a roof over our heads. We should work at keeping the joy in our hearts as well.
This week, spend some time working to explore things that bring joy to your being. What really makes your heart soar and puts a smile on your face? Spend some time not only discovering that, but engaging in it as well. We all could stand to have that J.O.B.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 