Tag: Motivation

STAY IN CONTROL😎

The Marx Brothers are one of my favorite comedy groups to watch. This band of brothers always had a million laughs a minute. Often, it takes watching their movies 3 or 4 times to catch all of the humor. This quote from the leader of the merry bunch really had me thinking. A few posts ago, we spoke about how to maintain your positive vibes around people that are difficult to get along with. If you haven’t read that one yet, I highly recommend you go back and do so. Yet, there are more than just negative people that can get you down. We are going to talk about how to deal with many different challenges today. Oddly enough, they all have a very similar solution.

Groucho lets us in on a key aspect to remaining happy – control. When we let someone, as we discussed in the post previously mentioned, or something get us sad, upset or any other emotion we do not wish to feel, we are giving that person or thing control over us. We are giving that person or thing the ability to dictate to us our own emotional well-being. If we stop and think about this, it is very easy to understand emotionally. In practice, however, it can be quite difficult to manage emotionally. We get upset. We get down and sometimes end up in a sort of emotional funk. It happens to me. It happens to all of us. The secret to an amazing life is not to expect to eliminate these experiences all together. We are human and on occasion our emotions will get the best of us. I still get in a funk. This time of year, with the cold weather and lack of sunshine, it is always a possibility. The secret to living an amazing life is to reduce both the frequency that these moments occur as well as their intensity.

Above is another powerful thought. Happiness is a choice. It is not always an easy end, but in order to get to that end, we have to chose to make that our destination. I opened my very first book, A Happy Life for Busy People, with this quote from Abraham Lincoln, “People are about as happy as they make their minds up to be.” If you decide that a happy life is important to you, settling for anything less will not do. True, you will still get down as we discussed, but when you are feeling that way, you will still know that happiness is where you are determined to be. Noticed I said determined not would like to be, or prefer to be. What do we do when we are determined to live in a state of happiness and inner peace and the world seems to have the exact opposite idea? We get to work!

Another great quote from Mr. Lincoln. If we are responsible for our own happiness, and we want to be in control of our own emotional well-being, what do we do when things get us down? That is a great question. I recommend starting by appreciating what those feelings are telling us. There are often great lessons to be learned in times of pain. If all we do is try to ‘deny’ our own emotions, not only will we miss the great lessons we could learn from them, but they are likely to return with a vengeance. If you are feeling sad, angry, lost, lonely or any other emotion, my first suggestion is to ask yourself why you are feeling that way. Let us say you are reeling from the loss of a loved one. You should not admonish yourself for feeling bad. Losing someone you care about can be one of the most difficult things we experience. Realize that in order to feel great loss, we must have been fortunate to feel great love. That is a blessing that not everyone has. We also had the great opportunity to share many amazing memories with that person. Our life, and our heart, will forever have a hole where that person used to be.

Now, after we have honored and discovered our emotions, which can take as long as we need it to, it is time to get to work. Begin by asking ourselves what the lesson we can get from life in regards to this tragic event. Could it be to make sure we treasure every moment with people we have in our lives? It could be that we need to take more pictures, make more memories and share more with each other while we can. How about to live and love without regret? After we have mined our negative emotions for the lessons they can teach us, it is time to put those lessons into action. Reach out to someone we have been meaning to. Plan and create memories with those we love. Make sure we are not so busy earning a living that we forget to create a life. As we take these actions, we can feel grateful for the lessons and reminders that the negative emotions have given us. That can take some time, but in the end, I think we can honestly come to terms with them.

In order to return our heart to a state of inner peace and joy, it make take utilizing some other tools. Many of these can be found in my second book, Living the Dream, but we are going to mention a few here. You could get together with family or friends to watch a funny movie (like the Marx brothers), we could listen to songs off our happy playlist. We can spend some time in one of our favorite spots in nature. I cannot stress enough how creating a list of things that bring us joy BEFORE we experience an emotional challenge is so important. When we find ourselves in a negative state, it can be next to impossible to think of things that bring us joy. I am sure you can all relate. Having such a list handy can literally be a life-saver in some cases.

We used the example of losing a loved one in this post because that is about the most difficult situation any of us can face. The same strategy can work if we are facing the end of a job, the end of a relationship or even just a morning commute filled with drivers who seem to being ‘using the force’ instead of watching the road. Discovering the true source and reason for our emotions, finding the lessons contained within them and then taking actions to learn from them and return our hearts to joy will work in all of these. It will also allow US to have control over OUR emotions instead of putting the key to them in someone else’s pocket. Do you want to have control over your own happiness, or would you rather let someone else control you?

CLICK HERE TO PICK UP MY BOOKS AND DISCOVER TOOLS FOR TAKING CONTROL OF YOUR OWN HAPPINESS 😊

DELUSIONS ARE THE SECRET TO MY SUCCESS 🤪

The picture above serves 2 purposes. First, it makes Margie and my cat-loving friends happy that I featured a cat in a blog post. (I am a dog person) Second, and more to the point of this post, it represents the kind of delusions that we are referring to today. People at my day job are always amazed that I am able to maintain a positive attitude in such a negative atmosphere. My response? “There is no law of physics or biology that states your mind and body have to be in the same place at the same time. I might look like I am here, but mentally, I am on a beach drinking out of a coconut!”

Above is me actually in the tropics enjoying a great book. The benefit to this way of thinking is that it reduces the stress that we may feel in any situation. There are 2 more interesting and important benefits that being slightly delusional can bring us. First, is acting as if the situation is already as you desire it to be, will help it manifest that much quicker. Let us suppose, if you will, that you want to be a best-selling author. If you conduct yourself as a best-selling author would, you would take interest in things that such a person would have interest in. You may find yourself speaking to publishers and literary agents. You will sign up to be part of author festivals. You will network yourself out to people a best-selling author would want to connect with. By taking these actions you will put yourself in position to succeed at your dreams and ambitions. This will make the percentage that they are likely to occur improve significantly. Once that happens, the second benefit will kick in.

Acting as if the situation has already reached our desired outcome helps us do one more thing – be prepared for it. What do I mean? Did you know that roughly 33 to 70% of people who win the lottery end up broke? This sounds crazy. Most of us think if I had a couple of million dollars, I could make it last a while. The truth is that if you are poor and you win a lot of money, you still often handle it like someone who is poor. You were not prepared to be wealthy.

Let us say you want to be famous. Maybe as an individual, or like in the picture above, part of a famous power couple. If you act and think like a power couple would before you become famous, then you stand a better chance of success. Knowing famous couples always have people trying to tear them apart. They look for anything that could be misconstrued as infidelity. Therefore, you make a conscious effort to make sure everyone knows that you are faithful to one another. Famous couples are often accused of being rude or mistreating others. It would serve us well to develop the habit of treating everyone with dignity and respect. That way when you are at the county fair being respectful to one of the vendors and they say, “I recognize you two from the internet! You are the cake designer and the guy who writes all of the motivational stuff.” You still smile even though they only got your lovely lady’s title exact. Margie and I even went on vacation 4 years ago (has it really been that long?) and no less than five people knew us in a foreign country! That has only continued to grow as her amazing creations are shared on internationally online and my influence continues to grow across the globe.

Look at this famous power couple 💑

Be a little delusional. Use it to your advantage. Practice what being a success would look like to you. It will reduce the stress you feel in life, help it manifest quicker and have you prepared when success does come. Delusions can be a little work. In the case of Margie and me, we work to make sure our love is strong and discuss what we would do if someone disrespects our relationship. That way as we continue to grow in service to others, we will be less likely to fall victim to any of the trappings that may bring. Ask yourself, “What delusion can I start living that will help me the most?”

GET EXCITED!🤗

It is day 2 of the New Year. How are your new year goals coming? Hopefully 2 days in you are still going strong. We all hear the cliché about the gym being full January 1st and empty by the 14th. As someone who goes to the gym regularly, I can attest to the truth of this. We know our drive will start to fade.

That is why it is vital to do something now to keep our excitement level up. I suggest that you plan celebrating small goals. Make it one week going to the gym? Buy yourself a new workout outfit. When you reach one month plan another treat. Maybe a spa day? Keep this up while the difficult process of becoming a habit takes place.

It is good to foster things to stay motivated. Maybe put together a list of songs that get you pumped up and create a Playlist. Think of movies that inspire you to be your best and work toward your goals. It is time to get these and other ideas together now. That way, when your motivation begins to fade, which it will, you have a little extra help.

A few other ideas that were given to me to help stay motivated are having a vision board, buying a new outfit in the size you would like to become, start a savings account with weekly or monthly goals. These and many others would be great ideas. What are yours?

YOU GOT THIS!👍💪

As the new year begins, we at Secret2anamazinglife.com, would like to wish all of you a healthy, happy and prosperous New Year! We are going to increase our dedication to you our wonderful readers and supporters.

In 2023, we promise you a post every single day. We know, to paraphrase Zig Ziglar , Motivation doesn’t last, neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend you have both daily. To that end, we are going to have a post every day to read. You never know when you might need a little boost and we are going to make sure you have it when you do!

We are also going to connect this blog with my personal podcast, Living the Dream with Neil Panosian. You will be able to take us with you in the car, as you go for a walk, in the gym or wherever else you listen to podcasts. We would also invite you to engage with us here more often. Your likes, shares and comments provide essential feedback that helps shape and mold us to serve you better.

On a personal note, my fourth book will also be released this year. That will be 3 books in 3 years. Exhausting? Yes. Fulfilling? I can’t even begin to tell you. We hope that everyone one of you have the best 2023 and we will be here to serve you and provide whatever assistance we can!

ELIMINATE THE OUTCOME 🤔

Here we go! The last day of the year. As we look forward to the new year, many of us will make resolutions and think about what goals we would like to accomplish in the next 365 days. That is good. I would like to encourage that. Looking to improve yourself is always something to strive for. This year, I would like you to contemplate something new. This was brought to me by doing something that I have told you about earlier this year. I heard it while listening to some daily motivational and inspirational videos.

The message came from Inky Johnson, the man pictured above. In case you haven’t read any of my previous posts about him, allow me to provide you a quick explanation. Inky Johnson was a stand out college football player. He was projected to be an early first-round pick and an instant millionaire. He came from a very poor family and was looking forward to being able to help them move to a better location. Only a few games before being drafted, Inky suffered a hit that ended up costing him the use of his right arm and the ability to ever play football again. In one play, all of the years of hard work and dreams of being able to help his family were taken away from him. That would be enough to break most people. Not Inky Johnson. When the doctors told him that he would never be able to use his arm again, he politely corrected them. “I am going to use this arm every day.” was his response. Inky has went on to be one of the most powerful speakers and motivators. He uses his story to inspire those that he speaks to.

When someone like that speaks, I tend to listen. What about all of those years of discipline and hard work that seemed to be for nothing? He has an answer for that too. He said something in this video that really stuck with me. He said if you want long-term success, you should eliminate the outcome. This sounds very counterintuitive, but considering who was speaking, I listened. He explained if you tie your efforts to an outcome, you will never be successful. The outcome, he said, can be taken away from you. I think he knows a thing or two about that. It doesn’t have to be as extreme as his situation. You could have been a great employee for years at your company and then they have to downsize or go out of business. You could work on being a great spouse, and your lover could leave you.

What is the point here? Don’t have any goals? Don’t chase any dreams? Not at all. What Inky said next in the video really made sense. He asked, “What is more important? What you get or who you become?” You see my friends, what you get can always be taken away from you, but who you become is yours forever. If your goal is to get in shape for that class reunion, that is good, but what if it gets canceled? How about getting in shape because you want to give your children someone they can be proud of? How about becoming someone who can be proud of themselves?

When we are setting our goals for the coming year, let us focus on who we want to become and not just what we hope to obtain. Ask yourself, who do you want to be in the coming year?

CLICK HERE TO WATCH A VIDEO THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE FROM INKY JOHNSON

IT AFFECTS EVERYTHING!😳

One of the most ironic things that I hear as a life coach is that people do not have the time for self-care and self-improvement. The misconception here is that it is somehow a separate area of your life. They will say things such as “I know I need to take better care of my mental and physical health, but I really need to focus on my money situation.” or “I would love to spend more time improving the way I deal with stress, but the kids keep me so busy.”

Do you know what the common denominator in your money, your parenting, your career as well as every other area of your life is? I give you a really big clue, you can find it in the mirror. You are the common ingredient in every area of your life that you are trying to improve. Worried about your health? Here is an interesting fact, do you know that you are 11% more likely to have a heart attack on Monday morning than any other day? How can that be? We hear about smoking, alcohol consumption and diet being risk factors. None of them would make Monday worse than any other day. What the data tells us is that life and job dissatisfaction is one of the main risk factors for heart attacks. When you are going to a job that is killing your soul every week, it might be killing more than that. If you are having an issue dealing with work stress, not taking the time to get help and learn to use stress in a healthy way can end up costing you a lot more than just medical bills.

How about money? Everybody needs to focus on their finances. What would we need to be more financially healthy? Energy? The ability to deal with stress and change? Focus? The ability to perform better at work? How are all of these obtained? We could focus on each area one at a time, which a lot of us do, but there is a quicker way. That is to focus on you. If you improve yourself, you will be a better parent, a better employee, a better business owner, a better friend and a better lover. When we improve ourselves, our lives improve. If you bring a better ‘you’ to any area of your life, that area will improve.

In closing, we need to stop treating self-care and self-improvement as a separate area of our life. Instead, we need to understand by focusing on improving ourselves, every area of our life will improve. If we focus on our physical health, for example, we will be sick less often. This would allow us to use less sick days at work. It would give us more quality time with our children and our spouse. That would make us better parents and lovers. If we improve our mental health and ability to deal with stress and change, that will help us be a more patient and attentive lover, parent and coworker. If we work on improving our listening skills…well, you get the idea. Focus on yourself. It is one of the best things you can do for everyone else.

INTRODUCE YOURSELF! 👋🫂

As the year draws to a close and we look forward to 2023, I would invite you to do one thing. Introduce yourself. This blog is called Secret2anamazinglife. It is a place to both give and receive. We are followed in all but 8 countries in this amazing planet of ours. We are followed on all 7 continents. That means there are so many of you out there with secrets that help you live an amazing life. It would benefit us all to know them. That is why I would like to extend an invitation to introduce yourself. Tell us where you read these posts of inspiration and motivation. Let us know a little about yourself. What do you enjoy about what we share here? Most importantly, share your knowledge. What do you do to live an amazing life?

Each of our lives, whether that be our personal experiences, the country we live in, the people we know, the jobs we hold or the pets we have, hold secrets to living an amazing life that are worth sharing. I get regular feedback from my friends in Italy, Greece, and Lebanon. I would love to hear from people in every country we are followed in. By all of us sharing, we can help each other live a more amazing life. We have over 4000 followers in India alone. 1000 in South Africa. Each one of you is awesome and a great asset to this website. In the coming years, I hope to meet a lot more of you. Certainly, my followers in Fiji and the Maldives can host a book signing. I would be happy to come out and shake your hands. In regards to our friends in France, Peru, and Kenya, as well as everywhere in between, it would be wonderful to meet you at the very least virtually. Tell me what you would like to read more about. Tell me what you enjoy about this site and what is important to you. In what ways do you benefit from what we share? In what ways could we improve?

Lastly, I invite you to share this site. The more people we can reach, the more we can spread the positive, motivational and inspiring messages we share here. Share the posts you enjoy on your social media pages. Invite others you think could benefit from learning secrets to an amazing life to be a part of our family. That is what I consider all of you, a family. We all gather here to both discover and appreciate the true miracle we are all living. Let us introduce and meet each other. Share a little about yourself in the comments below and please continue to do so all year long. Your interaction only makes what we share here stronger. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

As a bonus, you are all invited to become a part of my new Podcast, Living the Dream with Neil Panosian. Here you will hear me read sections of my books and get the behind the scenes information as to what went in to creating them. You can also listen to inspirational messages as you drive in your car, go for a walk, workout at the gym or whatever else you may be doing. Just click on the link below to listen and subscribe. It is an opportunity to become part of another inspiring community of like-minded people.

CLICK HERE TO DISCOVER THE LIVING THE DREAM WITH NEIL PANOSIAN PODCAST 😀

3 WORD LESSON THAT CHANGED MY LIFE.

I am currently about 10,000 words into my fourth book. At about the 6000 word point, I realized this book was going to be something entirely different than I expected. By writing this story, I am learning a lot about myself and my life. Just another great reason for everyone to write their story. You never even have to show it to anyone else. So far, only Margie has heard what I have written. I think her lone comment was, “It is funny.” but we are getting there.

Aside from the comedy that was my young and crazy life, I learned several valuable lessons. This sounds crazy even as I am writing it. You would think that you are more likely to learn a lesson by living it, but many of them only appeared as I began to write about them. Maybe it was the space of time and distance that allowed me to gain a proper perspective. Maybe I was just to young and stupid to appreciate what life, the universe, God an the world were trying to teach me. It is probably a combination of the two.

One of the great lessons that occurred to me this morning was this – every great triumph in my life was proceeded by a tragedy. Every great period of growth and evolution was proceeded by a death of sorts. The ‘me’ that was had to be humbled and often that version of me was put to death. At that point, it felt that life had beaten me. There were job losses, people losses, health losses. After all of them, much like the mythical Phoenix, I rose from the ashes as a more powerful, more evolved version of me. The hard truth is that none of that growth would have been possible without the death.

A person close to me once told me, “Neil, life always seems to knock you down, but then you end up in an even better spot.” Quite true. The more I thought about that as I wrote, the more it seemed to show up. It revealed one of the secrets to not only my success, but success for anyone. It is a 3 word lesson – Triumph. Over. Tragedy. We are never really down until we refuse to get up. When life beats you down, remember this lesson. Look for the opportunity for growth. Use the ashes to build yourself anew. A stronger, more resilient and more evolved version of you. This thought can be summed up in this beautiful quote from Wilma Mankiller.

DON’T FORGET!🙃

Middle of the week. Don’t forget to help someone else finish their week strong by sharing a smile 😊 or a kind word. Let us start this trend and fill Wednesday with joy!

IT IS MONDAY… HERE WE GO AGAIN!😜

Another start to another week. Only 2 more left in the year. We talk a lot on this site about changing our perception about Monday. I think we should face it like a big event. Like an athlete preparing for a big game. Can you imagine going into that with your head hung low, Energy low, and dreading the day? Your opponent would love to see that! How about a musician before a big concert? Imagine watching your favorite band walking on stage the same way you walk into work on Monday? Would not get you very pumped for the show, would it?

Weather you wake up looking like our rockhopper penguin in the first picture, like I occasionally do, or you are fighting off the bug that is going around, like Margie and I are, you need to show up with your A game. When i trained people as bartenders, or even to work with the public with the post office, I always reminded them to come in with a smile on their face and energy in their spirit. Nobody, with the exception of your therapist, wants to see and hear your problems. Les Brown said it best – “80% of them don’t care and 20% are glad it is you.”

That is not to say you can’t confide in a trusted coworker about a situation that is troubling you, when given the opportunity. As you walk into work, everyone has the Monday blues. The last thing that is needed is to add one more sad soul to the mix. Come in with energy. That way, if Monday tries to knock you down, it will have to reach a lot higher

The million dollar question, how do you walk into the place that often sucks your soul with energy? Take a cue from professional wrestling. Yes, I did just say to take self-improvement advice from wrestling. Whenever a wrestler walks into the ring they have a song cranking throughout the stadium. Think of what song you would use if you were a wrestler. Crank it up in your car before your walk into work. As Dwayne “the rock” Johnson says, “just bring it!” Maybe watch a motivating clip on your phone before you walk in.

Here is one last Monday thought to keep in mind. I heard a millionaire CEO asked how he went from an entry level position to the top. His answer? “Walk in like you own the place long enough and soon you will.”

Share what you do that gets you pumped up on Monday morning.