This may be an analogy that has been repeated all too often in self-improvement circles, but it has value in repeating. As you are given a safety talk in an airplane, they tell you to secure your oxygen mask before helping other around you. Why? You are really unable to help anyone if you are unable to breathe yourself. How many of us forget to apply this common sense knowledge to the rest of our life? It is easy to put our own mental, and often physical, health at risk for the benefits of others. Done long enough and we could have a breakdown, either a mental or physical.
Here is something else to consider. A slightly different lesson to be had in all of this. Do you know what happens when everyone puts their own masks on? You have a bunch of people breathing. That is always good. What happens if you have a plane full of people who are more concerned how Bob puts on his mask, or how Betty’s hair looks when she places the mask over her face? Suddenly, they find themselves struggling with their own breathing.
In a quick recap, here are the two lessons to be had in our airplane service talk. First lesson. If you do not take care of your own mental and physical health, you will be ill-equipped to assist anyone in theirs. Dare I say, the better your mental and physical health, the better you will be able to help others. This being said, an investment in yourself is also an investment in the well-being of those you care about. Second lesson. Focusing on others lives instead of your own, only causes pain and suffering for yourself in the long run. Make sure your life is in order before spending too much time worrying about what Bob or Betty are doing in their lives. Sense our life is one never ending journey to improve ourselves…you guessed it…don’t worry about what others are doing. Just focus on being the best version of yourself and you will have an amazing life.
I want to share with you a lesson I learned and some examples that came to my mind when I heard it. I was listening to some motivational/inspirational videos while on my way to work. This is a practice I recommend for everyone. You never know when you will either hear something new, or a reminder of something powerful you already know. This one falls into the latter category. In this particular video, the speaker referenced a quote from Jim Rohn, who I enjoy anyway. I am going to share that quote with you below.
The pain of discipline verses the pain of regret. Discipline weighs ounces, regret weighs tons. We can all grasp what that means to a certain point, but I wanted to give us a few real life examples to drive the point home. The first one that came to mind was eating pizza. Why? Mostly because I am always thinking of eating pizza. It is my favorite food to eat. If I could, I would probably have it seven days a week. Here is the thing. Eating pizza tastes good in the moment. It gives a quick boost of the ‘feel good chemicals’ in the brain. Putting off the urge to stuff your face with a delicious slice of sauce pie in favor of something slightly more healthy is not as fun. It takes…you guessed it, discipline. That’s a little painful. Say, ounces. If we are constantly giving in to the urge to eat pizza, or just unhealthy for that matter, we may feel good in the moment. Fast forward a year or so down the road. Our clothes have to be in a larger size. When we get out of the shower and look in the mirror, our hearts sink. We don’t feel as confident out in public. That is merely the outside. Inside, our arteries are clogging. Our heart is being forced to pump harder and our liver is working overtime dealing with the processed food. We can find ourselves depressed about how we look daily, or in the emergency room dealing with a heart issue. Then we would feel…regret over our choices. That ways a ton.
There will be actually two more quick examples. This can help us grasp this concept better and see where we are paying tons instead of ounces. Working out is another great example. Going to the gym is not fun for most people. It is stressful on the body, you get exhausted (although you actually gain energy on the back end) and you get sweaty and gross. (except for my lady who manages to look amazing after a workout) Taking time to go to the gym and spending the effort to put in a workout takes discipline. Especially when you really don’t feel like it. A life devoted to sloth and binge watching Netflix sounds more appealing on the surface. That takes very little discipline. You don’t have to pay those ounces. What happens as you grow older? Your bone density weakens and you are more likely to fracture something should you fall. It takes you far longer, and for more breath, to simply climb a flight of stairs. You must sit out times with your children and grandchildren, letting those memories slip away. You regret not keeping yourself in better shape. That weighs tons.
Our last example hits home for many of you after the holidays. Credit cards. They are super dangerous because they allow us, temporarily, to live beyond our means. “You mean I can get this thing even if I do not have the money yet?” is the thought many have. It can remove the pain of being disciplined and waiting until you earn enough for it. Those who like to skip the ounces required when it comes to paying your bills can find their credit card debt climbing. What starts to happen is the interest and late fees take up most of your payment with very little going to the actual amount owed. You look regretfully at the new pink Stanley mug, or whatever you bought. Suddenly, you find yourself pondering taking advantage of some of the bankruptcy lawyer commercials you see on television. As you can see in the picture above, that regret can feel like a ton of weight on your back.
Think of examples in your own life where you chose the weight of regret over the weight of discipline. You may feel like you are escaping in the moment, but it seldom leads to a good outcome. It reminds me of a quote by another amazing speaker, Les Brown. When people first hear this quote, they may not understand it, or dismiss it, but the examples above prove it to be quite valid.
There is so much going on in this picture that gives clues to living an amazing life. At first glance, it may not seem so. Let us take a dive in to discover the secrets that are in this picture. Starting with the obvious – the saying in the picture. “Use Sunday to reconnect with a place from your past.” What a great idea! My mother and I often discuss things that we did that seem like a different lifetime ago. We used to go to a great encampment they held at the local VA grounds. That no longer occurs. We talk about restaurants we used to frequent that have went out of business. Then, after a few more sips of coffee, we talk about places we just haven’t visited in a long time for various reasons.
Reconnecting with some of these places could bring back some really interesting memories. It also helps you stay grounded. Connecting your present with your past can help us be both nostalgic as well as present. Reflecting on memories of the past and noting how life has changed can be insightful. Looking around to see how the place has changed can have us living in the present. When we reflect on memories there is one thing I find interesting. At the time they were being created, we usually never know they will become memories. We are just enjoying the moment. This is a reason why it is helpful to take pictures, especially now that they can be stored digitally. I find it also helps to use as many of our senses as we can. Soak up every moment of our lives. We never know which ones will become our favorite memories.
The other item is what the saying is printed on. It is a day-by-day motivational calendar. I purchased it while visiting the mall to see my friend Nick, who manages the coffee shop there. Every day it supplies an inspirational thought for me. That is one source of positive inspiration added to my life and all I have to do is tear off that day. Considering how many negative influences come into our lives, without any effort on our part, it benefits us greatly to add as many positive ones that do the same. There are apps that send motivational messages to your phone. There are affirmations you can listen to on YouTube. There are so many influences that we can add. This leads us to the final thing we will mention in this picture.
The last thing you might not have noticed in the first picture, is the hand that is holding the calendar. That hand belongs to my lovely lady, Margie. Recently, I saw a meme about how picking the right woman makes a big difference. I would like to change ‘woman’ to ‘partner’ as this holds true across gender. Margie was kind enough to take this picture because mine had a big shadow in it. Much like adding as many positive influences in your life, the same can be said for positive people. I enjoy hanging out with my mother and going for coffee. Speaking of which, my friend Nick and I are long overdue for getting together. Even at my day job, where people can be ‘sunshine challenged’ I seek out those who do have a brighter outlook. I feel we support each other. How about your life? Adding, and spending time with, as many positive people as you can will fill your life with more joy than you can do on your own. As a bonus, the more time you spend around positive people, the less time you have for those ’emotional vampires’ that suck the life out of your soul.
In this one picture, there are 3 ideas I put into action that helps me to live an amazing life. It was a powerful reminder. How about you? Share a picture of things that bring joy into your life and help you live an amazing life. When we share, we all benefit!
As I write this, we are in the middle of a wicked snow storm. My lovely lady and I stopped at the store to grab a few things last night. It was packed. People were shopping like the world was ending. Another reason I would love to become a best-selling author and move to San Diego, but I digress.
A thought came to me as I watched people with their carts full of supplies. Why do we not prepare, at least with the same enthusiasm, for the storms of life? We act as if self-care, and the things that go with it, are for when we need them. In essence, we wait for the storm to arrive before we act.
Why not act like all of the crazy shoppers and prepare for the storms of life? Compose a list of songs that lift your spirits and save them in a Playlist. Have a list of movies that make you laugh. Have a collection of inspiring books.Whatever other items will help you make it through the storms of life.
Here is what I know for sure. The storms of life can come during any season and often with less warning than any extreme weather. We need to have preparations for our mind and spirit just as we have for any storm.
Many people I speak with have an outlook that puzzles me. When I tell them I am attempting some charity raising run, or obstacle course, they lol confused. Many times they ask if I am doing this on purpose. When I explain that I am working on my fourth book while working 45-50 hours a week at my day job and as a DJ on Sunday, they tell me “they could never do that.” On a rare day off, when I still go to the gym, they tell me they would be resting.
One of their arguments is that nobody could get them to do it. My response is nobody should have to, you should! They wonder why they should try to do a race, or pushtheir body physically. They believe there is no way that they will attempt anything that makes them uncomfortable. This holds true whether that uncomfortable feeling is physical or emotional. They can’t grasp why it would be a good idea to do so.
Here is why. When you do not dare to push yourself, you become shackled to your comfort zone. “That’s not so bad.” You might think. At least your comfortable, right? Let us be honest. It is a lot more comfortable to sit on the couch eating pizza and watching Netflix than to go out in the cold to the gym and grind through a workout. Guess who is going to be uncomfortable a few years from now when they are out of shape and can’t make it up the stairs without help from a sherpa?
It is not just the physical. When you are afraid to do anything that takes you out of your comfort zone, it becomes your master. This can be extremely difficult as the brain is hard-wired to seek comfort and safety. This can kill you. Not only physically as we saw above, but it can kill your spirit. Not living a life that is fulfilling is spiritual suicide.
To discover your true life’s purpose, and live a life you are in love with, will require you to step outside of your comfort zone. Let me tell you that creating this blog took me outside of my comfort zone. Writing my first book, and with Margie pushing me, promoting it, also took me out of my comfort zone. On my first podcast episode my voice was shaky and nervous. I’m sure it sounded the same the day I went from behind the bar, to behind the microphone to become a DJ.
None of these things make me nervous now, but they required me to leave my comfort zone initially. I would have never have touched all the people I have. I never would have dated the beautiful woman I am with and I never discovered the talents that were inside me. Step outside your comfort zone. As the quote says above, “Not so the world can seeyou, but so you can see the world.“
We have moved! Should you care to send correspondence to your favorite charming author and blog writer, or any staff at secret2anamazinglife.com, we have a new physical address to do so. Starting today, our new address will be as follows
Secret2anamazinglife.com
P.O. Box 333, Oak Creek WI, 53154 U.S.A.
Feel free to send us any ideas for topics you would like to discuss. Letters about how you enjoy secret2anamazinglife.com, or the Living the Dream with Neil Panosian podcast. We love seeing pictures of where you are from as well. Not to mention, we always respond and occasionally include a fun gift.
Send us a letter at our new address and say “Hello”. We love meeting our secret2anamazinglife.com family.
Have you ever met someone who is always talking a good game? You know the ones. They know what would make a successful life. They know how to get in shape. They know all about healthy eating. They have great wisdom on time management. It would seem a person like this would need a school to teach in.
When you take a close hard look at their life, you discover that they need a fire extinguisher. Why? Because their life is a total dumpster fire. They are full of wisdom and knowledge, but lack action. Knowledge without action is only potential power. If you know what you should be doing, and you are not doing it, you are actually worse off than the ignorant.
This week, hammer out what your philosophy of life is. Than, don’t waste time telling everyone what it is. Instead, think of ways in which you can embody it. What actions do you think would demonstrate your life philosophy? I would love to hear yours in the comments below.
As we begin the week. Let us remember that the future is uncertain. This can seem scary, but it is also a good reminder to focus on the present. In fact, the little influence we have on the future is the actions we take in the present.
As we all want the best future we can have, let us set ourselves up for success by living fully in the present.
Don’t forget to show your awesome this weekend. Shinelike only you know how! Be authentically you. That is what the world needs, more people living life from their heart.
Also, create a space where others feel safe to do the same. Trade judgment for a desire to understand and replace expectations with appreciation. This is the key to a great weekend!
