Tag: Love

LOOK AROUND YOU… THEN HELP 🫂

Last post we mentioned the quote from Tony Robbins that “What is wrong is always available. So is what is right.” Some of us have a challenge developing a grateful mindset. Doing so is the secret to living an amazing life. One of the easiest ways of doing this is to look around at the lives of those less fortunate. We do not have to look very far. The news is full of tragedy of both a personal and geographical nature. It blows my mind how upset with life some people can be. They lament how unfair life is or how hard they have it. If you can read these words, you have it better than millions of others. You are literate. That means you have the potential to learn just about anything. You have access to the internet. Which again means you can learn just about anything.

Gandhi’s thought above is a really bold statement. The late Greg Plitt, who continues to inspire, said “If you feel unmotivated to change your life, take a walk through the cancer ward at a children’s hospital.” That is an uncomfortable statement. The reason that it is so uncomfortable is that it forces us to realize how much greater our challenges can be. This is not to say whatever you are going through is not tough. Many of you are facing challenges greater than anything I have ever faced. It just reminds us that there are others who are struggling worse than us and could use our support and compassion.

Sticking with the gent from India, this is a great next step. When we see those folks who remind us that our situation could be worse. We should reach out and lend a hand. It is what will not only make their challenge a little less. It will help us gain the knowledge that even in our most challenging of times, we can be of service to others. We not only can be, but we should be. It is in doing so that we often discover our greatest gifts and talents. This can give us the confidence and purpose to make it through our own challenges. It is a win/win situation. It is how the world should be.

A PARTY 50 YEARS IN THE MAKING!

This weekend, my beautiful lady threw me a birthday party for my 50th birthday. There were plenty of people, lots of great food and sadly a thunderstorm as well. Here is the crazy thing. Everyone was having such a great time the only picture I got was with my friend Jenny as seen above.

It was oddly refreshing that everyone was focused not only on staying dry, but on enjoying the moment. I was so grateful for all of the wonderful memories that were created. It is a day that I will keep in my heart as long as I live. I can’t wait to see what my 100th birthday party will be like. It is my sincere wish all the people who were at this one will be there too.

The amount of gratitude I feel for everyone who braved the storm to show me they care means more than I can convey. The conversations and connections are the greatest gifts! It is my sincere wish you are all so blessed as I was this weekend!

Special thanks to my beautiful lady and her daughter for making it all happen and giving me a day I’ll never forget!

HATE HAS NEVER…

How useless is hate? It really has not solved any problem. Remember not to fall victim to this destructive emotion. Think of ways you can use hatred’s worst enemy, love, to solve a problem hate created.

WHAT REALLY MAKES A HAPPY MEMORY 😊

Above is a breakfast sandwich I enjoyed the other morning at my favorite place, The Wisconsin State Fair. It was delicious. Last year, my mother, Margie and I discovered it the first day we went. Shortly after that, I proposed to her. In reflection, we all recall the sandwich being quite delicious.

With that in mind, I was excited to bite into this one with the hollandaise sauce,ham, and cheese all in a delicious croissant. While it did satisfy my taste buds, it fell short of the year prior. No fault of the establishment. The ingredients were just as delicious.

What was missing? It was the company, the excitement of the day. Here I sat, all alone, trying to recreate that. Margie was baking and my mother was getting ready to help someone else.

What I learned was that it is the people and what you do with them is what makes memories and makes moments special. It not only adds flavor to a lonely breakfast sandwich, but it adds flavor to life as well. If you want to fill your life with happy memories, fill it with special people and loving times.

LITTLE THINGS THAT ARE NOT LITTLE 🐤

How little we give value to some of the most important things in our life. Our house, our car and our jewelry are not the most valuable things we own. As someone who has the unique perspective of facing death, and briefly experiencing it, my view changed dramatically. It is something that is very difficult to convey in words. All I can do is share my story and hope you can gain something from it. When I knew that there was a possibility of death in my life with my heart surgery, you take stock of your life. You ask yourself the question, “What would life be like if I were not here?” It is much like the experience that George Bailey has in the movie It’s a Wonderful Life.

Have you ever asked yourself this question? Have you ever looked around at those closest to you and asked how their life would be affected if you were not around anymore? How would they feel? Would they know how you truly feel? You may not be facing a serious and dangerous surgery like I was, but you do not need to be. We can be the healthiest, most cautious person and our day could be right around the corner. Have you seen the way people drive these days? This is not to sound fatalistic, but to stress that time is not our ally. It is fleeting at best and we never know when it will run out. I heard someone say recently, “You are one phone call, one diagnosis away from a completely different life.” That is frighteningly true.

Enough of these sobering thoughts! Look at those around you and try to picture their life if you were gone tomorrow. What would they be like? When I began to picture this, I realized many things. First of all, memories are the greatest gifts that we give each other. There is a cliche that people may forget what you say or do, but they will never forget how you made them feel. This is so true. I shifted my focus on the feelings I was trying to share. Realizing the greatest moments of my life consisted of memories I shared with the people I love, my focus was on creating as many as possible. People leave our life for a variety of reasons all of the time. Seldom do we see it coming. We are all there one day and the next, one of us is not. It can be friends moving away, loved ones passing or a terrible misunderstanding.

One of the things I enjoy reminding people of is that although our time on this earth is finite, the impact we create does not have to be. Some of the people that inspire me the most have been dead. Some of them for many years. When I think of Margie, if I were to be gone, I would want her heart to fill with love every time a thought of me arose. When I think of my friends, I would want memories of our times together to make them smile. Wishing and wanting are great, but we need to take actions now to make that a reality. It is sharing these little things with each other that mean the most. If I had a bad day, a hug from Margie would mean a lot more than if she bought me a cup of coffee. Staying with me when I feel sick means more than any grand gesture she could make. It is the little things that create the big amount of love that will live on long after we are gone.

WHERE IS YOUR HAPPY PLACE?

This statement could not be more accurate when it comes to me and my life. Sadly, I live where this is not a common occurrence. What that pushes me to do is develop other happy places. Why is this important, not only for this author but for you as well? Happy places are not only a perk to have in life, I feel they are a necessity! In a world where negativity and stress can quickly cause us to live in a state of overwhelm, having a place we can escape to is vital! My favorite happy place is a quite beach in a lovely tropical location. Two years ago Margie and I experienced this in the Bahamas. We met lovely people, had amazing food and enjoyed each other. Financially, doing this more often could pose a little bit of a challange.

 

What to do when your happy place is both thousands of miles, and thousands of dollars, away? Simple, develop more happy places. Who says you can only have one? Yes, I really look forward to Margie and my next trip to paradise, but in the meantime, there are lots of other places that make me happy. Going for coffee with my mother is always a lot of fun. Especially after a nice walk in nature. Conversation with my friend Nick is always insightful. Creating new content with my friend Jason is amazing. Going to the gym after a good night’s sleep and relieving stress is amazing as well.

As you can see, there are certain coffee shops, parks and other places that are happy places. One of the fun things to do in life is creating this list. By creating, I mean write the places down. It is easy to forget, especially in times of stress. Have you ever been going out to eat and can’t think of all the places you have been eager to try? Yeah, kind of like that. Plus, having a list of places that make you happy can be a fun reference. Looking at your list and saying to yourself, “I haven’t been there in a while.” can be fun. Not to mention, planning visits to these places, or with these people, can give you something to look forward to. This will make getting through the day that much easier.

How about you? What are your happy places? Do you have several? Some that are close and easily accessible? Have you written a list down of them? Here is something to remember when creating your list of happy places. They don’t have to be ‘places’ at all. Sometimes a happy place can be in the arms of the person you love. It can be time spent with a certain friend that always lifts your spirits. Then, it is not the physical place that matters so much as the company. Create your list of happy places now, and start visiting them often.

WHY BE KIND?

In a fast-paced world that is often very short on positivity, this is so important. We cannot tell who is suffering and who is not. It is not only a great idea, but I think being kind is our moral obligation to take care of each other. The only way that we can turn this world into a more loving and compassionate place is by being so ourselves. You cannot legislate compassion. You cannot decree it. You have to practice it.

My life mission is to leave the world a better place than I found it. To that end, I try to spread kindness wherever I go. The sad fact is that I am only one man, and can only physically be in one place at a time. I say ‘physically’ because with technology, I have the ability to spread words of encouragement and motivation to all the corners of the world. This website has been viewed in over 200 countries and on all 7 continents. While you might not be interested in growing a blog, podcast or YouTube channel, there are still great opportunities to spread kindness.

Many of you reading this have social media of one kind or another. Do you go there just to complain or post pictures of vacation? Why not mix in a message of encouragement and positivity? The world needs it now more than ever! How about positing positive things on other people’s pages? How many of us do that? A few posts ago we discussed how this habit can serve both us and them. A few simple world of appreciation or encouragement can go a long way. Think of how great it would be to inspire everyone who read what you wrote?

Another way to do so is to empower others to spread kindness. Helping others to get out of the world’s spell of seeing the worst in things and people is a precious gift! It is like planting seeds of kindness and compassion that will continue to grow and spread! These are the ways we can truly change the world. Will you join us?

BEING ALIVE IS SPECIAL 😊

As we get older, we appreciate how fleeting life is. It was difficult to understand this as a child. Isn’t a year always the same length of time? It is, but as the years go by, they seem to go past with a quicker pace. The loss of a childhood friend yesterday, before the age of 50, just proves life may not even be as long as we think it is.

That is why it is so important not to save the good things for the future.  The joy, the love, just enjoy them now. You may not get another chance. Share love, share happiness. Live now, it’s later than you think.

A GOAL WE SHOULD ALL STRIVE FOR. 🏆

We touched on this a little in the last post. We should endeavor to bring something to the lives of everyone we touch. It could be just lending an ear to someone who never feels heard. One of the best things we can do these days is offer an uplifting and encouraging message to everyone. The world seems in dire need of such things. There are few universal truths in the world. I think wanting to bring something to the life of everyone we meet is one of them.

Some of you may think you do not have much to offer. Let me assure you that nothing could be further from the truth. Everyone of us have our own unique perspective and our own unique skills that add something to the world. It can be an ability to stay calm in the midst of chaos. It can be the skill of finding the positive or humor in any situation. Again, the ability to truly listen to someone. Not just to reply to them, but to truly understand them is a priceless gift.

Starting today, whenever you interact with people, think to yourself, “What can I bring to this person’s life?” Approaching our personal interactions with the question “What could this person really use right now?” Will allow us to bring our relationships to the next level and improve the lives of all of those we come in contact with. How do you bring something special to those you interact with?

FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR LIFE ❤️

This post comes out on a Monday. It would be a great day to start these practices. Then again, any day is a great day to fall in love with your life. There are 2 ways to look at this. The first is spelled out in the picture above. Make sure to include the little things that bring you joy in your life. Your favorite coffee, your favorite music and time with your favorite people or at your favorite place. It is important to be present for these. One of my favorite coffees to have on the way to work in the morning is Dunkin. It is smooth and good to sip on while your body wakes up. The tricky bit is that my mind is often a few minutes away from waking up as I am on my way to work. I can easily finish a cup of coffee before I even realize I am drinking one. I have to make a point to sip it and be grateful for the experience. Gratitude is a great way to be present.

That leads us into the second way to fall in love with your life. That is to see the magic in it. How do we do that? Think of when you first fall in love with another person. Everything they do is magic. Oh, look at the way he takes out the garbage. Oh, when she opens the pickles she looks so cute. Everything they do is magical and you fall in love with it. Eventually, it becomes common place and the magic seems to fade. That can happen with life as well. That is why children seem much happier than adults. How do we get that magic back in our life and our relationships? One word – gratitude.

When you stop to appreciate even the smallest things in life, you begin to see the magic in them. When I stop to really appreciate that sip of coffee at 4am, trust me when I tell you I can see the magic in that. Same with my relationship with my love. When I pause to appreciate all of the little things about her, it creates magic between us. When was the last time you paused and let your partner know that you appreciate something about them? Take a second, look them in the eyes, and say “I just wanted to let you know how grateful I am that you ____.” Think of how you would feel if they did that to you? The more you offer genuine appreciation, the more magic you create. Just make sure it is always genuine.

This is EXACTLY the same way it works for life. Stuck in traffic? Say out loud, “I am sure grateful that I have a car to be stuck in traffic in.” Happen to catch a glimpse of the sunrise as you are coming in to work, or the sunset as you are coming home? Instead of lamenting about work, try being grateful for the beautiful scene you are witnessing. The more often you offer genuine appreciation for life, the more magical it will become. Again, just be genuine. I would love to hear some of the things you are grateful for. The more we share, the more we can inspire each other.