If we stop and think about it, aren’t some of the best moments in our lives the little ones done with the people dearest to us? Often, we have no idea they will turn out this way. We had out just for coffee, or a day of shopping, and end up with memories that carry us through a lifetime.
Today, I encourage you to keep doing the little things. You may not even realize how much they mean to those you care about. I would love to hear about a little moment that had a big impact on you.
For those of you has been following this blog for any time, or those who know me, realize winter is a tough time for me. I drive to work in the dark, drive home in the dark. For someone who loves the sun, this is tricky. Not to mention, we have not had a sunny day here in several weeks.
One thing I’m working on this year, is to find as many positive things as possible. Even though I write these blogs, trust me when I tell you there are many issues I’m working on too. Staying positive in winter is one of them. Today, while checking the weather on my phone, as you can see in the picture above, I noticed the sun had set a minute later! That means, the days will start to lengthen from here until June!
One minute certainly isn’t much, and you can see Friday it will be -2, but it is something. That’s kind of the secret to remaining positive. Finding the little light in the darkness. It is the flower growing in the crack in the pavement. It is the smile from a stranger on a tough day. Look for all the good you can in your own life. Remembering, quite often, the little things are the big things. ☺️
We have spent the last few posts discussing relationships. How to increase the odds of finding a good one. How important it is to bring the best version of you to the relationship you are in. How important it is to respect yourself while you are respecting your partner. These are all great ideas. They are not always easy to do, but the reward is certainly worth it. What is that reward? It is a relationship that supports and adds joy to your life. Whether that be a great friendship or an intimate relationship.
Even while working hard to craft these skills, life can put us in situations that make maintaining our joyful and loving relationship difficult at best. Although it may not look like it from the outside, Margie and my relationship is no different. From the beginning we dealt with people whose self-serving nature tried their best to pull us apart. Add to that issues of family stress, working in the bar industry where the idea of a healthy relationship and the respect shown to other relationships is extremely low. Makes life challenging at times. Recently, you add the passing of quite a few people close to us, most recently Margie’s mother and my discovery and hospitalization for a genetic heart issue and you can imagine there is almost as much stress as there is love at times.
How do we, and more to the point, how can you deal with the stress of life and keep on loving? Whether it is family, friends or your spouse the answer is the same. The easiest, and to be honest, most enjoyable way to do this is to realize the little things are the big things. This sounds cliché, as many things with love can, but the reason something is said so often is because there is truth in it. How can we turn the little things into the big things? How can we take a cliché and turn it into a part of our lives? Allow me to share with you a few personal examples that may help you.
The way Margie and I accomplish this is first and foremost keeping an attitude of gratitude. When we have challenges in our relationships, or even in our life in general, it can be easy to lose sight of all that we have to be grateful for. If we are so busy with work we do not have time to sit down to a wonderful dinner together, at least we have each other and something to eat. When one of us complains, the other does their best to find something to be grateful for in the situation. It helps that both of us have this desire.
In the middle of the whirlwind of stress we often face, there is one thing we do more than any couple I know and it makes all the difference. We love. What I mean is in the middle of a karaoke show, or last night while shopping at Best Buy, if one of us feels love for the other we show it. This can be anything from stopping for a quick hug or kiss, or even just focused compliments and words of affection. Last Friday while doing a show I happened to notice just how beautiful Margie looked at that moment and I told her. I held her hand looked in her eyes and said, “I’m sorry I know we are really busy, but I just had to let you know how beautiful you look to me right now.” The words touched Margie who thanked me and leaned over and gave me a kiss. Sadly, the grown woman who was standing next to our DJ area who witnessed this responded in what I can only describe as a immature and cynical way. She said “Eww! Eww!” and made a motion like she was going to get sick. Did I mention the bar atmosphere can often not be the best place for a couple?
In your own relationships, take time to make sure the little things become the big things. Whether it is family, coworkers, friends or the special someone you love, take time to show appreciation and gratitude. When you feel love for that person make sure you pause and take time to express that. It could be a hug, an email, a card or a quick phone call. When you see two people sharing a moment like this try and understand all the stress and challenges they may be facing. Taking time to enjoy each other, even if only for a quick hug or kiss may be the special reward that keeps that relationship working.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 