Have you ever tried teaching someone something you know how to do rather well? It can be frustrating and take a great deal of patience. The other evening I had the great pleasure of sharing coffee and conversation with my friend Nick. As so often happens when the two of us get together the conversation turned to personal development and growth. I had to confess something to him and I am going to share it with you now in hopes it may help a lot of you.
One of the greatest struggles we can endure is maintaining a sense of compassion and understanding of our fellow humans we share this planet with. Some of us can refer to this as judging others. If you were to ask me if I were a judgemental person, for the most part I would have to say ‘no’. I have friends that I care deeply for that belong to many different races, religions and other such groups. I really understand that we never know what happens behind the scenes or what someone’s story may entail.
One of the areas that does tend to upset me is those who are not evolved emotionally and spiritually. Those who tend to judge others or carry a rather negative attitude into life. I guess that is because the information is available and it is free. Books can be had at any library. Videos are a click away on YouTube and Google can tell you anything you need to know from the Law of Attraction to enlightenment. Still, there are those who are even ignorant to these facts. Hopefully, the fact that you are reading this blog signifies that you do not fit into the afore mentioned category.
There are even those who are aware of personal development and know they, and their life, could be so much more but choose not to pursue that. I even heard someone brag once about how they avoided making more of their life. To me this is very hard to understand. It is my desire to help everyone create more joy, passion and success in their lives. When I find someone who displays an ignorance for universal laws or an obvious lack of emotional maturity it is both frustrating and a seeming cry for help. It is my struggle to understand and also respect the fact that they might not be intrested in or desire improving their lot in life.
This is a struggle I face whenever I try to reach someone who may not have had the years of experience in the field of personal development I have. It must be the same for those who have so many more when they are teaching me. We all learn at a different pace and learn different things. Share all the good you can, but do so with patience and compassion. If you become frustrated with spiritual ignorance of those around you, feel free to refer to this quote.
“When waiting for your goal to manifest, don’t count the days, make every day count.” – Neil Panosian.
This is a quote from my upcoming third book. Before we get to the quote, let us take a second to discuss the title of this post. Why on earth would I advocate not having patience? After all, isn’t being present, mindfulness and meditation all involve patience? I have posted the analogy about the farmer planting his crop and then not walking outside the very next day expecting a harvest. Personally, I really like that analogy. It not only shows how insane expecting certain things to happen before their time, but also because many members of my family were farmers.
All of those great examples considered, how can I advocate for not having patience? Here is why I say that. The word patience itself can often conjure up feelings of being passive. Some people, when they hear the word patience think of someone sitting in the lotus position waiting for the world to change. Instead of counting how many days are passing and your goal is still not arriving, focus on making each of those days count.
I think this manner of thinking is best illustrated with personal examples. Take physical fitness. You have been in the gym for months now and you still do not look like those people on the red carpet. Rather than wondering how long it will take, focus on making each workout count. When my beautiful Margie was waiting for her cake business to explode, she focused on making each of the cakes she was working on a masterpiece. Not only did she succeed in that, but her cake business is off the charts now. While I am waiting for both my writing and videos to go viral, I work on creating the most valuable content worth sharing. In doing this we create the best chance of success.
What are you working towards? What goals are you working to accomplish? Ask yourself today, “How can I make every day count as I wait for my goal to manifest?” As Earl Nightingale mentioned, the time will pass anyway.
Even in regards to your life mission, making each day count can be so valuable. Let us say your mission is to be a more positive person. Each day you could add some kind of positive influence. Maybe a picture to hang by your bed that says “grateful” that you can see each morning upon rising. I use a day by day calendar that I can read an inspiring quote as I am leaving for work at 4 a.m. Maybe your goal is to help leave the world a more positive place. That certainly can’t happen overnight, but each day you can make it count. If you make a concerted effort to add positivity to the people around you than you have made that day count!
Remember my friends, as you are waiting for your goals and blessings to make themselves known, don’t count the days, make the days count!
Just a quick reminder in the middle of the week. Stay positive my friends. Let us reflect positivity wherever we are so that it may be reflected back to us.
More thoughts coming tomorrow.
Those of you well-versed in the Law of Attraction know how important it is to raise your vibration and keep it high. It serves us well for manifesting what our hearts desire. For those of you who may not be that well-versed in the Law of Attraction, raising your vibration means raising the state of how you feel. Simply put, the higher your vibration, the better you feel.
When we feel good all sorts of things open up to us. We are more likely to try new things and talk to new people. Both of these can lead to wonderful new adventures. We take better care of ourselves and those we love. We are more likely to wear a smile and spread joy to others. To, of course, the obvious – life is a lot more fun. After all, that is what living an amazing life is all about, feeling good.
If you are thinking there is more to life that just feeling good, I challenge you on that statement. It is important to help others, yes. When we help others how do we feel? We feel good. It is important to do good for the world around us. When we do so how does that leave us feeling? It leaves us feeling good. When you are enjoying life you are far more productive and pleasant to be around. Who wants to sit next to a ‘Debbie downer’? Not me, and I would venture a guess not you either.
Do yourself a favor and try to fit in as many things as you can in the first list while limiting or eliminating as many things as you can from the second list. Do not stress about it for that would defeat the purpose. Work to raise your vibration, or feel as good as you can for the next 21 days. Make it a focus and watch the miracles begin to unfold in your life!
Boy this is a confusing title! Then again, trying to understand life can be a little confusing as well. How can you both be your past and yet not be your past? We are going to be taking a look at both of those. By the time we are done I have confidence you will be better prepared to make your life an amazing one.
Let us start by looking at how you are your past. I believe we touched on this a few posts ago but it bears repeating. One example is your physical body. Let us say you find yourself a few pounds north of ideal. Let us say you have also recently started a new workout program. You may look in the mirror after a few weeks and not see the results you expected or desired. That is because you are your past. Your present is that you have comitted to a workout routine and a healthier lifestyle. The past few years may have included way too many pizzas and Boston Creme doughnuts. Not only can I understand that, but I can empathize as well. Perhaps you are not that good with keeping up with your oral health and you end up with a cavity. You can start bushing and flossing like someone obsessed and you still will have the cavity.
Even more than your physical body is your emotional and mental state. Your thoughts go a long way to creating your reality. If you have been thinking your life is full of misfortune and your wallet is light while the number on the scale is not, those events will tend to come true. Negative thoughts equal a negative life.
So you are your past? There is not much we can do to change that? Not so fast. While your present reality is a reflection of your past, your future will be a reflection of your present. If you hold firm to your resolution to live a healthier life, a year from now you will have a lot to smile about. If you maintain great oral health, your next visit to the dentist will be filled with less dread and a lot less pain. Your thoughts work the same. Begin to fill your mind with thoughts of positivity and gratitude and watch your life change as if by magic!
What it all comes down to is this, although you are a reflection of your past, you are not a slave to it. Perhaps an emotionally trying situation from years ago has left you scared and unable to move forward? You can begin to transform that situation into a motivational event and begin to move forward. If you need help you can begin to see a therapist. We do create our own futures, but we do so by creating our own past. Today’s prest is tomorrow’s past. As the saying goes, “Do something today your future self will thank you for.”
A lot of people will see this quote and think that it is not so. Of course a lot of people live a life that is south of amazing. Whether you are studying the law of attraction, business or quantum physics, you undoubtedly understand what you focus on expands in your life. The average person looks for and anticipates problems that may exist in any situation. It is a survival mechanism and can be extremely helpful. If, however, you are not just looking to survive in life, but to thrive, I suggest taking a slightly different approach.
Looking for challenges that might pop up in life is smart and I do so myself. Looking for and preparing for challenges is far different than focusing on them. When you are focused on seeing something in your life you will find it. When you are not focused on something in your life you may miss it even though it is right in front of you. If you find this hard to believe, stay tuned we will have a fun and simple experiment that you can do to prove it to yourself in just a second. First let us digest the theory that you notice what you focus on and miss what you don’t. There are people who are constantly telling others how rough their life is. How they have the worst luck. Wouldn’t you know that tends to hold true. You look at their life and some crazy things happen to them that are not that pleasant. It is not the things that happen that lead to the attitude, but the attitude that can perpetuate the events.
Those who have this challenging life may be rebeling at the notion of this, but that does not make it any less real. When you are determined to see the challenges in your life that make it such a struggle they will stand out nice and tall. Meanwhile, any good fortune you may have will go under appreciated at best, or even unnoticed at worst. When you life has a run a good luck your subconscious mind will spring into action and say, “Well he keeps saying we have bad luck. Let us go find some!” Believe me when I tell you I had a hard time accepting how responsible I was for my own life at first too. To help all of us along I am going to share a quick experiment with you that you can do wherever you are to demonstrate how true this is.
Wherever you are right now whether it is at your home office, driving in a car, on the job or anywhere else this will be fun. First, clear your mind the best you can. Next, look around you for anything you see that is red. Find red anything. Red signs, people wearing red clothes, a red stop sign or anything else red. Look for red. See red and note that thing. Now close your eyes for a second (unless you are doing this experiment driving) and think of something around you that is brown. Rather hard to do isn’t it? A million brown things could have been surrounding you but you would not have noticed them because you were looking for something that is red. In fact, when you were looking for things that were red did you notice things that were maybe a dark shade of pink or wine colored just so you could have another thing that was red?
This is a basic example of how our minds work. Imagine if you will, how our life would change if we would use this for gratitude, for example. Gratitude is one of the most powerful emotions we can feel. How great would our life be if we looked for everything we loved in a situation? Think of how life would be if when we are stuck in traffic next time we played this game and asked ourselves over and over, “What can I be grateful for in this situation?” or “What do I love about this situation?”
I can tell you this formula has worked miracles in my life. I am not exagerating, but do not take my word for it. Use this experiment yourself. Do it for 21 days randomly throughout the day. Start with times you are enjoying yourself. This is a little easier and helps the brain get into the habit. Next, try it when you are waiting in line at the store, stuck in traffic or dealing with a difficult customer. Every time you use it, you will get better and so will your life. Feel free to share your experiences with using this formula.
There are lots of crazy things I do from day to day. Often when going into a public restroom I never think to make sure I locked the door until after I am indisposed. Forgetting to make sure there is toilet paper is quite another. Still, one of the worst habits any of us can get into is talking about our problems. For many of us it has become an addiction. Like any addiction it can be extremely hard to break. Why is it important to break this habit? We are going to look at two very good reasons why we should switch from being addicted to discussing our problems to being addicted to discussing our dreams and joys.
First, there is the obvious reason – it feels terrible. Talking about and thinking about your problems can be exhausting phyisically, mentally and emotionally. The goal in our lives should be to live where we feel fulfilled in all of these areas of our lives. Talking about our problems ad nausem will not leave us feeling fulfilled in any way. When we feel down and drained emotionally and spiritually, our energy levels and immune system usually follow closely behind. This can not only make our existing problems worse, but add additional problems of sickness and lack of prodcutivity. Not only do they leave us feeling this way, but they can also bring down those we are talking to. Would you enjoy being around someone who is endlessly discussing everything that is wrong in their lives? I know I wouldn’t. Thus, you may find yourself starting to be very unpopular.
A second reason is slightly more metaphysical. Anyone who knows the slightlest thing about the law of attraction knows the saying “Where focus goes, energy flows”. In other words, what you focus on becomes more a part of your world. This has much to do with a part of your brain called the reticular activating system. This is discussed in more detail in my upcoming book, Living the Dream. As an example, have you ever bought a new car or even a new outfit and started to see it everywhere? Do you think many of the people in the world just started buying the same thing you did? Of course not. What happened was it became something of consequence to your brain. The RAS acts as a filter of sorts. It brings to our attention and into our realm things that we focus on and that our important to us. If you are focused on your goals and what makes you happy, you will tend to see opportunities and reasons for joy. If we are constantly talking about and focused on our problems we will not only notice more of them, we will receive more of them.
The reason talking about problems can be an addiction is because a lot of people tend to do it. Stop and listen to a conversation at work. Read posts on social media. Watch the nightly news. They are a constant stream of problems, problems, problems. If you hear someone start to say things like, “Why does this always happen to me?” or “I always have the worst luck.” You might want to consider walking in the other direction. Get into the habit of discussing your joys. What makes you happy? This may seem difficult or even awkward at first, but stick with it and notice how much better you feel. After you become a ‘joy discussion expert’ you will notice people will want to talk with you. Maybe even new social opportuinites will present themselves to you. As a bonus, you will feel better and begin to attact even more of what makes you joyful! Feel free to share your experiences in the comments below.
I heard this verse while listening to a video by Les Brown and it really struck as something I needed to share. I think for a lot of us, and certainly those of you who have been following this blog for any length of time, we know what we put out in the universe comes back to us. Put another way, what we give is what we get.
Not long ago I posted a blog featuring the “Golden Rule” in all of the different religions. The message is the same although the wording may be slightly different. Treat others as you would like to be treated. Looking at this logically we can certainly understand it to be true. If you are a person who is generally nice and caring towards people, they tend to be generally nice and caring to you. Yes, there are exceptions but for the most part this is how it goes. Wherever Margie and I go we are treated to warm and wonderful words and actions. Why? When we go places we do our best to treat others with warmth and compassion.
It also is one of the keys to success for all of our businesses. Whether it is me writing, her making a cake or both of us when we DJ, rather than just ‘going through the motions’ we want everyone to feel loved and bring something special into their lives. In return, most people enjoy coming to our shows, her cake business has been exploding and my writing continues to impact lives. We use the gifts that we have been blessed with to serve and bring joy to our brothers and sisters on this planet. We approach everything we do with a genuine desire to make someone’s life better. It reminds me of this great quote from Zig Ziglar.
What about those people who don’t eat cake? Maybe they don’t sing karaoke or have a desire to read. How can we positively impact their lives? The first biblical quote can answer that question – we pray for them. Whatever method you employ for supplication, sending out love and positivity to those you share life with can only come back to bless and serve you. We should all be cheering for each other in life and doing what we can to make each other’s lives better.
This inspired one more passing thought. If we are so familiar with the benefits of giving to others to the benefit of ourselves why is there not more of that done in the world? My only answer to this question is to offer you my solution, start yourself, start today. Offer up prayers for others, throw out all the positive vibes you can to as many people as you can. In return, your life will surely be blessed.
One prayer we might really wish to make is to those who are practicing this law in reverse. Those who spread lies and gossip. Whether through ignorance or malice, they are bringing about not the ruin of those they are speaking about but the ruin of their own lives. Soon they will find themselves on the receiving end of their own negativity. They will find themselves living a lonely and sad existence. If only they had desired what was best for others, than they too would receive what is best for themselves.
Today do yourself a favor and put this law to work for you. Look for ways in which you can bless and bring joy to the lives of others. Let the words that come off your tongue be positive and full of blessings for others. Soon your life will be nothing short of a miracle.
To discuss this point we must bring in your refrigerator. Yes you heard me right. I need you to think about your fridge. What color is it? Does it have two doors? Do they open left to right or right to left? Now think about your car. What color is your car? What color is the interior? When I asked you to think of each of these items you had a picture in your mind, didn’t you? You did not think of “I drive a Honda CRV.” You actually pictured your car.
The reason this happened is because we think in pictures. Now if I were to ask you what your mind looks like most of us would conjure up a thought of the brain. Why? Nobody knows what the mind looks like. The mind is not the brain, but it is the closest thing we can come up with.
What does all this have to do with vision boards and living an amazing life? Let us think of what success looks like for us. Do you have a clear picture? For you it may include more money, a bigger house, a fancy car or a million other different things. If they are just abstract thoughts that your brain does not have a picture to correlate with, it will be a thought of very little power. This is why we need to get clear as to exactly what we are looking for. What does ‘more money’ look like? What would you like your house to look like? Brick? Field stone? How many bedrooms? A hot tub maybe? What kind of fancy car would you like to drive? What color would it be?
This may seem like trivial details to some. If you are familiar with the law of attraction, however, you will understand how important this can be. From a scientific standpoint, without a clear picture of your goals in your subconscious mind your brain will not know exactly what to work towards. You may have periods of productivity followed by what seems to be regression and chaos. It is the ‘one step forward, two steps back’ situation.
Enter the vision board. In a nutshell a vision board is a board with pictures of all of your goals on it. Not only will this help you see your goal (it is hanging on the wall in your hallway) but it will do so with no work on your part. You just walk up and look at it. This helps program the images of success into your subconscious mind. Now, even when you are unaware, your brain is laser focused on your goal and will be constantly on the lookout for things that match it.
When you wish to put your mind to work for you, the first thing you have to do is speak its language. As we discussed earlier, we think in pictures. By showing you brain pictures of your goals daily (you standing by the car of your dreams, the house you want to build, etc.) you are speaking them into your mind. That my friends is how a vision board works.
There are 3 aspects to your life – the past, the present and the future. Each one plays an important role and each one is necessary. We must learn from the past. We must fully appreciate the present. We also must take actions today to positively affect our future. You must guard against putting the accent on one to the fault of the others. We cannot stay stuck in the past, we cannot live in the present with total disregard to how our actions affect the future. We also cannot let fears and concerns of the future paralyze us into inaction. As you can see each one of these times periods plays a role in our lives, but each one must be included.
One area this can serve us greatly is one you may never have thought of – gratitude. When you ask someone if they are grateful or when someone asks you if you are grateful we usually think of being grateful for all of the good that has come into our lives. This is great and there is nothing wrong with it. By focusing on what we have to be grateful for, the good will only expand in our lives. Taking this formula into consideration, it would make sense that the more grateful you are, the more you will have to be grateful for.
An interesting thing about this is the fact we may be ignoring two-thirds of what we can be grateful for. How can this be? By being grateful for all the good things that have come into our life that is focusing on the past. That is one third of what we can be grateful for. It can serve us greatly to find things that our currently in our life to be grateful for. This will not only help us realize that the present is a very wonderful place to be, but it will have us feeling pretty great as well.
Often, the present is ironically viewed through the negative. For example, are you grateful for the job that pays the bills or do you complain about having to go to work everyday? Trust me, I can understand how hard this can be on any given day. The truth is if you lost your job, had to make it without any income for a while and then were to get that same job back, chances are you would be very grateful. Another example; are you grateful for your relationships only when they are happy or even when they are not exactly going the way you wish they would? Merely having someone in your life to be upset with can be a blessing. It can also be a great learning experience. Being grateful for the present allows us to fully enjoy the wonders of our life as it is today and may wake us up to some great things we have been missing out on.
Lastly, there is the future. Are we grateful for things that are coming to us? According to those in the law of attraction field, it is this very thinking that helps us create our reality. While listening to Michael Beckwith, a great teacher and speaker, he spoke of being able to get to the point of being grateful for the challenges. How does this happen? What on earth would prompt you to think, “I am so grateful some crappy situation is coming my way!”? We must understand that even those are gifts. They will teach us lessons about life and ourselves. They will develop our strength of character and provide us with opportunities to polish our skills in fields like anger management, forgiveness, apologizing and being humble. If this seems like a reach at this point, don’t worry you’ll get there. Start by thinking of all the good things you would like to come your way. Vacations you will experience. Special times with those you love. Maybe meeting that special person you will love.
Make sure you are including the past, the present and the future in your gratitude practice. It will have you feeling on top of the world and manifesting more things your heart desires.