Tag: judging others

MOST DANGEROUS FORM OF BLINDNESS

This is one of those post that do not seem like should have to be written. For most of you reading a site like this, they don’t. Not that long ago a coworker was lamenting to me the difference between two religious groups. “Why can’t the one just understand their religion is the wrong one?” he asked. You may already guess which group his beliefs line up with. I inquired if it had ever occurred to him that the other group may just as fairly ask the same question. “No, of course not because their beliefs are wrong.” He made this statement while looking at me as if I was being willfully ignorant. When I encountered as to why his beliefs were correct and they other group was not, he said because his religion said so.

I would imagine whatever faith you belong to, they have a vested interest in convincing you that it is the one true religion. It is certainly ok for someone to think and have a strong conviction that is the case. What is not fair is to go around judging others who feel the same about their beliefs. If we do our research, I am sure there are belief systems that are older than ours. There are ones that may be followed by more people. Our faith is largely determined by our geographic location and that of our ancestors. It would make sense that people who live in a different part of the world may have different beliefs. Do you know what? That is ok. As long as we teach our children, both by words and actions, that treating all people with dignity and respect is what matters most.

Do not be blind to the fact that others have an equal right to have a belief and conviction in their faith as do we. It very well might be different and that is ok as well. What is not ok is to treat each other harshly or even violently over those differences. You can have respectful differences and still love your neighbor. That is part of what being the best version of yourself is all about.

NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER, OR A MAN BY HIS HAT ðŸ¤ 

Imagine seeing a man wearing such a hat walking down your street. This man, Steve, lived in my city and quite often walked the streets wearing this hat and often dressed in the most outlandish outfits. Many people were cruel and mocked him as he walked past. Some shouted mean and hurtful things as they drove past him. None of them asked him about his hat or why he dressed as he did. In fact, very few actually stopped to get to know the man in the hat. If you asked people in the city if they knew of the man in the crazy hat, most of them would say “Yes!” If you further asked them what his name was, they would be silent. One person even told me, “Why would I want to talk to a crazy person like that?”

His name was Steve. I had the pleasure of sharing a breakfast with him at a charity event. Not only was he not crazy, he was polite, insightful and kind. He had a chemistry degree and held several patents. The story behind the hat and the outfits is a rather personal and tragic one. Although that is what the majority of people wanted to know, it actually was one of the least remarkable things about this man. Most people wanted to know, “Why does he wear the hat?” Very few stopped to ask, “Who is the man under the hat?” If they had, they would have met a caring and soft-spoken man who was enjoyable to talk to.

In today’s world we can be quick to judge without knowing the story behind the person. It reminds me of a story that the author Stephen Covey shared. He was on the subway with a man whose children were running wild and the man just sat there doing nothing. The kids were running, yelling and jumping. Can you imagine yourself in Stephen’s situation? How frustrating would that be? You are just trying to get where you are going meanwhile these children are misbehaving and their father seems to either not notice or care. Finally, Stephen had enough and said to the man that he should do something about his children. The man looked up with tears in his eyes and said, “I am sorry you are right. We just came back from the hospital where their mother died. They really don’t know how to act right now and neither do I.” Guess how Stephen felt then?

Whether it is children running crazy on a subway, or a man who walks around in a crazy hat and outfits, let us seek to understand instead of judge. Something that life will always remind us of is that none of us have all the answers. We all have our quirks and faults. If our life was to be laid bare and our skeletons let out of the closet, we would be praying that nobody judged us. Let us afford each other the same courtesy.