This is an important message for today’s world. We need to shift from placing blame, to creating solutions. They only way to do this is by working together. It can be simple to say, but I know it is not easy to do. Hurt, years of oppression, violence, and division have been going on since the dawn of man. How can we hope to reverse this trend?
If you listen to what you hear from politicians, world leaders and the media, it is as soon as we Conquer the opposition. That is a lie. The solution lies in forming mutual respect with the opposition. This requires both sides to admit the wrong they have done and pledge to work together to create a solution to prevent those wrongs from occurring in the future.
What does this have to do with you and I? Plenty. We cannot wait for world leaders and those running out country to remove their thinking apparatus from their sitting apparatus. That may never happen. We have to startwith us. Work on eliminating our prejudices. At the very least, stopspeaking hate and division and start thinking of solutions. Vote for those who do the same instead of those running on a ticket based on fear, blame and revenge. Most importantly, raise children who respect others and want to make a difference in the world.
It is not to late to save the world and the people who live in it. The change has to start with someone. Why not let it start with us and why not start now?
For my younger readers, this here is Robert Plant. He sang for a rock band you may have heard of – Led Zeppelin. I am not sure if he really said the quote above or not. It doesn’t really matter. It is great advice we should put into action this weekend. Monday through Friday we are so inundated with news of the world. This can come from coworkers, family, friends and is even sent directly to our phones. There is war between Russia and the Ukraine. There is one now in the middle east. There are politicians fighting to outdo each other in looking asinine. It is never quite clear who is winning. I suppose it changes depending on the day. Do you know what being up to date on all of this information gets us? Not much. We can carry on a conversation in the office. It also seems to foster a feeling of hopelessness for the human race and a feeling of disgrace for humanity. Sounds fun, right? Not hardly.
This weekend, turn off the news and turn up the music. Do you know what you will lose by not being up to date on the world’s conflicts and the fools often put in charge of them? You will lose stress and a disturbance to your inner peace. Instead, do what Bob Marley advocates, and let the music take the pain away. In my first two books, A Happy Life for Busy People and Living the Dream, I advocate creating a ‘happy playlist’. Songs that lift your spirit and fill you with good vibes. It is my firm belief we should expose ourselves to positive influences at least 51% of the time. Far more than that if you would like an amazing life. Since you are reading a website titled “Secret2anamazinglife” I would surmise this to be the case.
The more we balance out the negative influences we are exposed to with positive ones of our choosing, the more inner peace we will experience. In today’s crazy world, being able to exist in peace is nothing short of a super power. Turn off the news and put on some Led Zeppelin, Bob Marley or music of your choosing. Let the music carry you away to somewhere happy. I know I will be as I celebrate my lovely lady’s birthday. How about you?
In today’s world, this is a very powerful message! If you are foolish enough to turn on the news, you will hear countless stories of conflict, much of it leading to violent and deadly consequences. This could be crime you see in your nation or even your town. On a grander scale, the events in Ukraine and Israel are broader examples of this.
It does not even have to be such extreme cases. There was a man at one of my books signings that told me about how he would always get so mad on his drive to work listening to talk radio. He was angered with the actions of those “idiots”. Those people, in this case, were people who differed from him politically. I don’t even recall which side of the fence he tended to lean. Not that matters much as the anger and hate is the same on both. You could see his blood pressure start to rise just telling me about it. All of this happened at a book signing for my book titled Living the Dream. I asked him what I thought was an obvious question. “Why don’t you just change the station to something you find enjoyable?” He looked at me as if I was being willfully ignorant. “How will I know what they are up to?” he asked. “What would happen if you didn’t?” I countered. He walked away shaking his head at the foolish author. It is my sincere hope he cracks open the great book he purchased and applies a few of its principles.
It doesn’t even have to be some outside source getting our blood pressure up. Many of us do this to ourselves. How many times have you seen something divisive that someone has posted online followed by an endless string of comments. As you read down the comments, they become more heated and lascivious. It doesn’t even have to be something controversial. No. Even people celebrating victories or sharing something that brought them joy can be subjected to scathing comments. Why people go through the trouble of sharing something negative when none is needed is beyond me. Here is something even more confounding – why do we even respond to these?
In our example of the string of comments, I can promise you that none of those people got anything beneficial out of them. In fact, most of them probably got an increase in blood pressure with a side of cortisol, the stress hormone. Quite harmless in and of itself, but I am guessing that was not the only “discussion” they had that day. Many of them probably continued to think about, and maybe even talk about, how wrong this person was. This only served to get them more upset and experience negative emotions while they were thinking and talking about it.
The crazy thing about all of this is that it is completely unnecessary. Is it that important that you have to be right? Here is another thought to ponder. Do you think it might be possible that due to different life experiences and circumstances a person can have a different, yet equally valid, opinion on an issue than you? Is there a chance that both you and that person could be right? Their opinion being right for them and yours being right for you? Do you think there is room to be friends with someone who doesn’t think and feel exactly like you? Hell, that even happens in my house. Of course we know the answer to all of these is yes.
One more question. If you finally ‘prove’ to the other person that your opinion is ‘right’ or ‘better’ than theirs, was it worth the stress and loss of inner peace to get there? What happens if you do win an argument? Do you get a trophy? A cash prize? No. I will tell you what you get. You get get stress, high blood pressure, a weakened immune system as well as a weakened friendship. For what? Are all of these arguments and needing to be right worth the loss of peace? How difficult would it be to say, “Although I disagree with your opinion, I respect your right to feel that way.” and then move on to a more agreeable topic? Next time we feel the urge to argue a point, or prove we are ‘right’, let us slow down and ask ourselves if it is worth our inner peace.
Currently, in Israel there is terrible bloodshed. The same is true in the Ukraine. In both cases there are groups wanting to take vengeance on each other for all of the terrible violence being committed. I cannot pretend to have all of the solutions. I can tell you what does not work – violence and revenge. If you conquer another group through fear, violence and intimidation, that only leaves with a festering resentment that will eventually bubble over into future violence. Meanwhile, millions of lives will be lost. These lives could have contributed many amazing things to the world. We will never know.
It is not just war where this is evident. Here, in the United States, there is a bitter feud between political parties. The Republicans and Democrats are busy “Getting back at each other”. Do you know how much work is focused on the real issues facing the country and the world? None. We are paying these people vast amounts of money to act the same way kids do on the playground. They are not focused on working together to solve the issues. They are almost singularly focused on making the other look bad.
This way of thinking and acting is not reserved for war or foolish politicians. No, you can see it happen around the office. It happens in families and in circles of friends. When will finally work together to solve human misery instead of seeking vengeance for it? Once again, I am not pretending to have the answers. I just know violence and revenge solve nothing.
This may be one of the more intense things you read today. I know it is one of the more intense posts I have written in a while. I hope by the time we leave each other today, you will be inspired to look at the world in an entirely different way. The above picture is the outside of a concentration camp from World War II. It still blows my mind how humans can sink to this level of evil towards their fellow human beings. To have a total disregard for the extreme value of human life is beyond me. As you all know, I believe each one of us have a unique gift to bring to the world and a loss of even just one life is too many.
There were so many families that were torn about. Generations that were eliminated from existence in these terrible places. Above is a picture of one man who lived through this nightmare. His name is Viktor Frankl. He was from Austria. As a medical student studying to be a phycologist, he was concerned with the high rate of teen suicide at the time. He set up free clinics in his town that were made available to those who needed them. In 1931, there were no teen suicides thanks in great part to the role of this man. You would think such a caring soul and brilliant mind would be treasured and his programs expanded upon. Sadly, in 1938 Austria became part of the Nazi empire.
In 1942 Viktor married the love of his life. Only nine months later, his entire family were sent to the concentration camp. His father died of starvation. His mother and brother were killed in the gas chamber. His wife died of typhus. Viktor spent 3 long years in the camps. While in there, he practiced what he called logotherapy. One of the aspects of which is that meaning plays a central motivating factor and force in one’s life. He also stated that people find meaning in one of three ways. Making a difference in the world, having particular experiences, or by adopting particular attitudes.
The quote above is a great encapsulation of the book Man’s Search for Meaning. While living in deplorable conditions. Even witnessing the death of his father, his mother, his brother and his wife, Viktor found beauty. Even while being treated as less than human, he found beauty. How on earth was this even possible? One, he was determined that his circumstances, no matter how extremely hellacious they were, would not determine his attitude. He refused to let the evil captures dictate how he was to think. The last freedom, as he stated above, that he had left. He also found beauty in the most extreme situations. One of the examples I found gut-wrenching, yet oddly inspiring, was his story about his soup. The prisoners were given a daily broth of potato water that was somehow supposed to sustain them. One day, while looking in his bowl, he found a potato peel. He celebrated this turn of good fortune as if he had won the lottery. My friend Linda, remembered a story where he saw sunlight shining through a piece of glass and enjoyed the beauty of that.
Man’s Search for Meaning is a book that at once details the unspeakable depths that man can sink to, but also the resilience of the human spirit and will. Everyone should read this book. I think I will do so again shortly. What really stands out to me is, when determined, a man could find beauty in a living hell. When I start to complain about aspects of my life, I think of Victor Frankl. If he could find a beautiful life in the most deplorable conditions, then my inability to find beauty in my own life has less to do with my circumstances and more to do with my attitude.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 