Tag: inspiration

BETTER THAN BEING RIGHT ✅️

In today’s world, this is a very powerful message! If you are foolish enough to turn on the news, you will hear countless stories of conflict, much of it leading to violent and deadly consequences. This could be crime you see in your nation or even your town. On a grander scale, the events in Ukraine and Israel are broader examples of this.

It does not even have to be such extreme cases. There was a man at one of my books signings that told me about how he would always get so mad on his drive to work listening to talk radio. He was angered with the actions of those “idiots”. Those people, in this case, were people who differed from him politically. I don’t even recall which side of the fence he tended to lean. Not that matters much as the anger and hate is the same on both. You could see his blood pressure start to rise just telling me about it. All of this happened at a book signing for my book titled Living the Dream. I asked him what I thought was an obvious question. “Why don’t you just change the station to something you find enjoyable?” He looked at me as if I was being willfully ignorant. “How will I know what they are up to?” he asked. “What would happen if you didn’t?” I countered. He walked away shaking his head at the foolish author. It is my sincere hope he cracks open the great book he purchased and applies a few of its principles.

It doesn’t even have to be some outside source getting our blood pressure up. Many of us do this to ourselves. How many times have you seen something divisive that someone has posted online followed by an endless string of comments. As you read down the comments, they become more heated and lascivious. It doesn’t even have to be something controversial. No. Even people celebrating victories or sharing something that brought them joy can be subjected to scathing comments. Why people go through the trouble of sharing something negative when none is needed is beyond me. Here is something even more confounding – why do we even respond to these?

In our example of the string of comments, I can promise you that none of those people got anything beneficial out of them. In fact, most of them probably got an increase in blood pressure with a side of cortisol, the stress hormone. Quite harmless in and of itself, but I am guessing that was not the only “discussion” they had that day. Many of them probably continued to think about, and maybe even talk about, how wrong this person was. This only served to get them more upset and experience negative emotions while they were thinking and talking about it.

The crazy thing about all of this is that it is completely unnecessary. Is it that important that you have to be right? Here is another thought to ponder. Do you think it might be possible that due to different life experiences and circumstances a person can have a different, yet equally valid, opinion on an issue than you? Is there a chance that both you and that person could be right? Their opinion being right for them and yours being right for you? Do you think there is room to be friends with someone who doesn’t think and feel exactly like you? Hell, that even happens in my house. Of course we know the answer to all of these is yes.

One more question. If you finally ‘prove’ to the other person that your opinion is ‘right’ or ‘better’ than theirs, was it worth the stress and loss of inner peace to get there? What happens if you do win an argument? Do you get a trophy? A cash prize? No. I will tell you what you get. You get get stress, high blood pressure, a weakened immune system as well as a weakened friendship. For what? Are all of these arguments and needing to be right worth the loss of peace? How difficult would it be to say, “Although I disagree with your opinion, I respect your right to feel that way.” and then move on to a more agreeable topic? Next time we feel the urge to argue a point, or prove we are ‘right’, let us slow down and ask ourselves if it is worth our inner peace.

THE FORGOTTEN KEY TO ALL SUCCESS. 🔑

Last post we discussed the importance of finding tools and strategies that we can customize to us and our particular journey. You are reading a website about living an amazing life, but what defines an amazing life? The answer will be different for each one of us reading this. First of all, this site is followed in over 200 countries with many different cultures, values and beliefs. Even in the same country, town and even family, people have different goals and ambitions. There is one thing that will make any goal you are chasing more likely to succeed. It doesn’t matter if that goal is a health goal, a financial goal or a spiritual goal, there is one element that people often miss when pursuing their ambition. That missing key to your success is to enjoy the journey.

Finding ways to enjoy the journey is not some added bonus you should look for, it is a necessity! No matter how much it may further our aspirations, if we cannot find something in the journey that could bring us joy, it will not be sustainable. We often use the example of physical fitness to illustrate points, so let us go with that. Many people absolutely dread fitness. Especially when you begin, it is important to find an activity that brings you joy. If gyms are intimidating, try going for a walk in nature. Maybe after years of sloth, your body is not able to do walking just yet. That’s ok. Try biking, swimming or even dancing vigorously around the house! Whatever you choose, have fun with it.

A great way to have fun is to look at your progress. That is why having goals that are measurable is so important. Look, it is no fun to wrap the measuring tape around your belly after years of pizza and beer, but know that the starting line and get excited for the progress. Make a point to stop and appreciate yourself, and your efforts once a month, or once a week. Whatever you need to do to keep yourself motivated. What happens when the scale hasn’t budged or the inches haven’t moved along despite your best effort? Celebrate the fact that you have shown the effort. Perhaps look at discovering a new, and fun activity to add to your efforts?

Whatever goal you are pursuing in life, make sure to add this question to your list. When writing the steps to accomplishing your goal down, ask yourself, “How can I enjoy this process.” Do not quit until you find, at the very least, one answer. When I go to work, every day I know I am putting aside money for both my retirement and my next vacation. That makes my day a little more enjoyable. I look forward to finding ways to make my coworkers happy and improve their days. This brings me joy. How about you? What are you working on? How are you going to make it enjoyable?

DOING THIS RUINS YOUR PRODUCTIVITY 👷‍♂️

When I was growing up, multi-tasking was the ‘in’ thing to do. Sadly, there is nothing that ruins productivity more. Firstly, you can’t truly work on multiple tasks at the same time. Our brains are not wired for that. Even if I had 2 computers going at the same time, I could not write both my books and my blogs at the same time. They would end up coming out in a language that does not even exist. If I were to write a book for 5 minutes, then switch to my blog writing computer and let us throw in running over to my microphone to add an episode to the Living the Dream with Neil Panosian podcast. What kind of quality content do you think I would be putting out? It would be garbage. I would be chasing 2, or in this case 3, rabbits and end up catching none.

A far better course of action is to become laser-focused on one activity, finish it and become focused on the next. Do you know how long it takes the brain, on average, to regain focus? The answer is 23 minutes. Now, if we are constantly switching from one task to another we are never fully in focus on any one of them. In the end, this will cost us both time and productivity. Just at the point where we are getting in focus and our brains are adjusting to the task we are working on, we switch gears. This makes little to no sense. Let us look at an even better example.

I like trees, and I hope none are harmed in the reading of this post, but the point should be pretty clear. When we are multi-tasking, we are hitting that tree in a 1000 different places. When we are focusing our efforts and hitting that tree 1000 times in the same spot, we will accomplish our goal in a far quicker time. Think of this next time you want to work on a million projects at the same time.

Let us begin to train our focus to work on one thing at a time. We will not only use our brains to their greatest potential, we will accomplish a lot more and do it in a far shorter amount of time. By developing this habit, we will make the coming year the most productive, and a lot less stressful, year that we have had in a long time.

LET US CLOSE IT OUT RIGHT! 🏁

I have to confess something. When I first began this journey of self-improvement, saying like this drove me crazy. “You have to be something before you can have it.” “You have to feel abundant, before you can be abundant.” None of this made sense to me. How can you feel abundant, when you are not? How can you feel fit when you are not? It is really about being on the same frequency as that which you desire. Another saying that made little sense to me when I started out, so let me break it down a little further for you. When you identify as someone who is ‘healthy’ but your body says that you could be a spokesperson for a value meal, how does that compute? Simple, you have to start somewhere. When you are beginning to be something new, you are still starting from where you were.

Here are a few more terms to confuse us. Energy, frequency and vibration, what do they all mean? Nikola Tesla was a genius, and I am sure he could explain it far better than I could. We could look into how at its core, everything is energy and the way of measuring an objects frequency is cycles per second or how often an object vibrates in a repetitive motion. Anyone up for that discussion? Me neither. I would much rather refer to these three in terms of ‘identity’. When you identify as a healthy person, you have that frequency, vibration and energy. Here is the tricky part, when shifting energies, the old energy does not give up very easily. However, if you truly want to identify as a healthy person, that is powerful. There are few things as powerful to a person as their sense of identity.

If you begin telling others, and more importantly yourself, that you are now a healthy person, you will act and think in a certain way. You will begin to eat to fuel your body and not just to entertain your taste buds. You will look at fitness as something you get to do and not something you have to do. If, you find yourself in the drive thru at McDonalds, it may occur to you this is not something a healthy person would do…several times a week. That is the problem with the “6 -minute abs” way of thinking. Diets and fitness fads do little to change the identity of the person involved. Therefore, their success will be both limited in terms of success and duration.

As we close the year out, let us work on a more powerful sense of identity for ourselves. At the end of the day, it is something we determine for ourselves. This, is one of the main stepping stones for a lot of people in this social media world. We pay far too much attention to other people’s opinions. Les Brown has a saying, “Never let someone’s opinion of you become your reality.” This is especially true when starting something new. When you are beginning a new journey, people are all too happy to point out where you were or how far you have to go. “You are going to be healthy? The guy who ate an entire pizza at the holiday party?” That is who you were, not who you are going to become.

One way to help change our identity, is to change our perspective. Like the quote that began this post. As we look to increase our abundance this coming year, let us start with gratitude for all we have. Take money, which is only a portion of abundance. Do you know the average global income is $12,235? I didn’t either. Most of you reading this make more than that. Therefore, you are closer to being wealthy than poor. You have access, in some form or fashion, to the internet. That is better than 35% of people. Do you have clean water to drink and bathe in? Better than 25% of the world’s population. Do you have all 3? You are abundant my friends. Start looking up how many people have laptops, how many people have 3 meals a day. The list can go on. By the time you are done, you will discover how truly abundant you are. Then, you will be on that frequency, vibration and energy. You will identify as an abundant individual. This puts into play your subconscious mind and your reticular activating system in your brain. More science that I make simple in my book, Living the Dream. Until you read that great book, just know if we change our identity, we change our reality. Read that last line again and think how you can put it to work for you.

YOU CAN’T ALWAYS, BUT THEN AGAIN YOU CAN ALWAYS…🫤

Confused by today’s title? It really is as simple as the quote above. Let us be honest with each other here. The week is ending. The month is drawing to a close. Even the year is almost over. Many people think that with a month left to go, it is a little late to make any grand improvements. Here is the truth about improvements, especially self-improvements, they all start with a single moment. Yes, the may take days, months or even years to complete, but they all start with a single decision. It all starts to change when we finally say “Enough!” or “Now is the time!” The end of our rope is the location for many of our best beginnings.

One of the most profound changes we can make is our own attitude. It is our attitude at the onset of a project that most determines its outcome, as William James mentioned. We can think of how this may be true. If we begin a project with the belief that it will not work, how hard will we look for solutions to the challenges that may arrive along the way? Not very hard I would imagine. If we are determined to get in better shape, how many options will we be willing to explore? The net worth of the weight loss industry is estimated to be 72.6 billion. That is people trying a lot of options. How well any will succeed depends a great deal on the attitude of the person attempting them.

With one month left in the year, there is no greater area we can work on improving than our own attitude. We will have bad days. Many circumstances are out of our control. What is completely in our control is our attitude. The better our attitude, the better our chances of success in life. The worse our attitude, the worse our chances for success will be. This is not limited to just one area of our life either. Our attitude crosses over and touches every aspect of our life. This makes it one of the most important areas of study and improvement we can make. Why not work on entering the new year with a new, and improved, attitude?

DO IT OR DIE! 😳

What a title! What could possibly be so important that if we did not do it we would die? Is there really such a thing? The short answer is ‘Yes.’ Do not worry, this is not like one of those social media posts that claim if you don’t share it with all of your friends, coworkers and the neighbor’s dog that you will be cursed with 10 years bad luck. In fact, this is actually backed by science. You will not fall over dead when you walk out the door tomorrow if you do not do this either. What you will do, sadly, is you will call it quits several years before those we do put this simple tool to work for them will. Keep reading to find out how you can not only add more years to your life, but ultimately more life to your years.

According to Equifax, most people live 10-20 years after they retire. That is a pretty good margin. How can we be more likely to lean towards the 20 year side and not the 10 year side? I was having this very discussion with my coworker, Rob, the other day. According to neuropsychologists, having a sense of purpose is one of the greatest predictors of health and wellness in old age. Let that soak in for a while. For those of us who are picturing just laying on the beach everyday sipping cocktails (certainly something to do when retired) there must be more to life. Those who wake up with a purpose after retiring, have reduced stress levels, are in better physical health and age more successfully. Think of it. Less stress, a stronger immune system and a greater sense of happiness. Isn’t that what we all want when we retire?

Work, as trying as it can be, gives us a reason that we must get out of bed in the morning. We have to pay the bills. We have to earn money to go on vacation or to take the lady out for dinner. Whatever it is you are working towards. Sometimes it is working towards retirement. A lot of people are shocked when they get there. It is as if they worked their whole life towards something, and now that they have it, they are not sure what to do with it. If you are thinking that you do not need a purpose, consider this fact. According to a recent study of retirees, having a purpose lowered their risk of death by 15.2%. This held true across different races, religions and ethnicity.

We have discovered that having a purpose not only increases the length of your life, but the quality of it as well. This does not mean you have to work until you die. We ended the last post with a quote from the great Howard Thurman. We included two more from him in this post. I think they give us the answer to living a long and fulfilling life. That is finding what sets our soul on fire and doing more of that. It could be working in the garden. It could be joining a book club and discovering great new books, as well as friends. For me, I know retirement will consist of continuing this blog, writing books and producing episodes of the Living the Dream with Neil Panosian podcast. How about you? What will your grand purpose be when you retire?

Added bonus here. You do not have to wait until retirement to reap all of these benefits. Find something that sets your soul on fire now! At the very least, start looking for that. Once you find it, and start enjoying it, you will experience the wonderful benefits we mentioned in this blog. I know after a hard day working my day job, writing is as much of a release as it is anything else. I love exploring nature and going to the gym as well. Coffee with friends provides interesting conversations. Time spent chasing dreams with the love of my life never fails to be exciting. When I retire, it will be more a transition than an end.

IT IS NOT BIG ENOUGH! 😳

The title of this post may sound a bit critical. To some men it may sound far worse than that. Fear not. There is a benign but still very important meaning to this. It has to do with one of the most important, and powerful, aspects of self-improvement – goal setting. You hear a lot about the importance of goals from many people in many places. Even the bible says, “Without a vision, the people parish.” A vision, is just another name for a goal. Here is the tricky bit. Most of us set goals based on the person we are. This may sound logical. How could we set goals for a person we are not? What is meant in the photo above, is we have to set goals that will force us to grow and become more than who we are.

One of my main passions is to encourage others to share their stories. EVERYONE has a story that would inspire many if they only shared it. Whether that is to show someone how to improve their lives, or just let them know they are not alone in the struggles they face, every single person can be a hero to many. That includes you. One of the responses that I often hear when putting this forth, is “I can’t write a book/start a YouTube channel/write a blog.” The reasons are varied, but include not having enough time. Not being disciplined enough. Not knowing anything about those activities. These excuses may be valid, but only in regards to who you are now. My friend Kurt recently completed his first book. As we was writing it, he learned and developed many new skills. The person he was when he was done, was not the person who started the project. He had grown and developed a whole new set of skills. His book, Nothing is Everything, is definitely worth a read!

Setting goals can be a scary endeavor. There is the thought of how you might feel if you do not reach the goal. Which is better, to fail or to fail to try? Two very important things to remember. If you work towards your goal and fall short of completing it, you have not failed, you have learned and can attempt it again, only full of more knowledge. I like this next fact. When they interviewed people who were close to the end of their lives, the number one regret was not the goals they didn’t reach. It was not even the mistakes they made. The number one regret was the things they did not try. Let that sink in. Do you want to reach the end of your life and regret all of the things you could have done and who you could have been? If my words were not enough to inspire you, allow me to leave you with this great thought attributed to Dr. Howard Thurman.

NEVER LOSE AGAIN! 🦸‍♀️🦸‍♂️

Wouldn’t it be great if you could go through life never experiencing a loss or a failure? What if I tell you that I actually live that life? As impossible as that may seem, it is true. Before you roll your eyes or think that I am joking, let me assure you this is not only 100% true, but you can do it too! This is not to say that you will not suffer heartache. Everything you aspire to accomplish will not always turn out as you had hoped. You will still face struggles along the way. There will still be relationship issues, maybe the loss of a job, or even worse, the loss of a loved one.

If you are a logical person, you might be asking yourself, “I thought he said we would never experience a loss?” As painful as some of these afore mentioned events are, they can be changed from a loss to a lesson. It involves a simple change of perspective. This may seem like I am splitting hairs, but hear me out. Does changing what we call something really change its reality? You bet. No, it will not bring that relationship, job or loved one back, but it will change your emotions about the situation. When we think about it, our emotions are our life. If you are happy and feeling good, your life is good, no matter what circumstances may be. If you are sad and feeling down, your life is not good, no matter how well situations may be playing out for you.

Using Nelson Mandela’s philosophy, we can see how we can never lose again either. My one caveat I would suggest is learning in both cases. Feel free to quote me on this one, I never lose, I either have a victory or a lesson. In both cases, I have learned. We can learn how to be a better life partner when we screw up a relationship. We can learn ways to improve ourselves, or align ourselves better with our passion when we lose a job. We can learn more about living with love, and less with regret when a loved one leaves us. This is not simple hyperbole, I have personally done all three.

If we learn from our mistakes, they are not a loss, but a lesson. Therefore, the only way we can lose in life, is to fail to learn. My relationship with the love of my life would not be nearly as amazing if I did not learn from my mistakes, both in past relationships, and in the wonderful one I share with her. Your relationship will have mistakes and challenges, it just shouldn’t keep having the same ones. The great thing about working for the United States Postal Service, is that they are always threatening to eliminate your job. Why is that a good thing? Sounds rather stressful doesn’t it? In a way it is, but once again, I have learned to put that stress to work for me. It reminds me to never allow my occupation to become my identity. This is a lesson that many of us could put into use. It also motivates me to pursue outside interests. To work on improving myself and my writing. Losing a loved one is never easy. It will be painful and I do not wish to marginalize that pain. However, I recall once I learned to use that pain to make sure that I loved everyone I care about to the fullest in my life, it became a great motivator. The only thing worse than the pain of loss, is to have that pain compounded with regret.

Do what Nelson Mandela does. Do what I do. Never allow yourself to simply lose in life again. When you turn everything in your life into a lesson, not only will it lessen the pain of perceived losses, but help you grow and develop as a person. There is no more powerful feeling to look life right in the eye and say, “I never lose. I either win or I learn.” You owe this to yourself.

WILL YOU SEE IT THIS WEEK? 👀

Tomorrow is Monday. I know that does not thrill a lot of you. Here is the thing, even all we dread is filled with opportunity. The drive to work, even if it is in cold weather such as we are experiencing here, is ripe with potential. If you drive, you could listen to something inspiring. This could be your favorite motivational speaker, it could be a song that really gets you pumped up. It could be an audio book you really are interested in. My suggestion would be the Living the Dream with Neil Panosian podcast, but I might be biased.

Finding the opportunity in everything may sound a bit like ‘positive thinking’ fluff, but it is quite the opposite. Finding the opportunity in everything takes hard work. It is easy to just say, “Poor me. Why does this always happen to me?” and sulk. It takes guts and determination to ask, “How can I put this situation to work for me?” It also strengthens you. I present my recent trip to the dentist as a great example. To me, there are two people in the world. Those who like going to the dentist and normal people. I decided that I was going to use this as practice for maintaining a positive and courageous outlook. It was not easy, but focusing on learning about the procedure as well as the people performing it helped.

When we harness the ability to put all of life’s circumstances to work for us, instead of being victims to them, we control life instead of the other way around. It amplifies our successes and softens the blow of our defeats. Who would not want that? Life will be one continuous upward path to personal empowerment and improvement. It will also be a lot less stressful. Think of situations that you view as holding you back and ask yourself, “How can I put this to work for me?” You will be amazed at how this change in perspective can transform your life.

1% TODAY

It is the weekend and the last thing you want to do is hear about work. I completely get it. It is, however, what separates the good from the great. Even doing 1% more, as the photo above suggests, can make a huge difference over the course of a year. Take any aspect you are working on improving and imagine what that would look like with a 1% daily improvement. It would be amazing, and so are you. Now get out there and get that 1%!