Tag: Gratitude

THE POWERFUL P WORD

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What if you could do something to guarantee you would not fail? How much would that be worth to you? Knowing going into any project or setting any goal that you would succeed. How good would that feel? How would it change your attitude when you start out? Well there is such a power. It is the power of persistence. It was Babe Ruth who said “It is hard to beat the man who never gives up”. He went on to set the record for home runs. There were days that he struck out, days he couldn’t seem to get a hit, but he just kept swinging.

So if this power is a guarantee why doesn’t everybody achieve all of their goals? The reason is this, although persistence is a sure fire way to succeed it is not easy. After all who wants to keep going after they “fail” at something. Who wants to get up and try again? Still, Edison did it 10,000 times while trying to perfect the light bulb. Who would keep asking after you hear “No” again and again? Still, Walt Disney did it after being told “no” by over 300 bankers when trying to money for Disneyland. Can you imagine life without those two things?

I am not Walt Disney or Edison you say. Obviously that is true as they have both passed away and you, my dear friend are alive and reading this. So how can we develop determination and persistence like those two? This is how, by using the P words we have learned so far. Discover your purpose. Then, list what you will lose by not achieving it and gain by doing so. In other words, give your self a dose of both pain and pleasure. Then increase your knowledge and why in the subject to fire up your passion. Then rest assured in the knowledge that if you persist you will not, in fact you cannot fail.

In case you are still having your doubts on your own abilities to do so, here are two more real life examples. The first is a question I will ask you. How long would you give a baby to learn to walk? One day? One week? One month? How long did it take you? Did your parents tell you “Sit down and stop trying to walk, you are just getting in the way and are going to hurt yourself”? Of course not. So how did you learn to walk? You learned to walk but trying, failing and trying again. How long did it take you? That answer differs for each one of us. We rarely apply this thinking as adults. If we try and fail we become discouraged. We look around and compare ourselves to others. “Well they made a fortune by the time they were 30, I must be behind” or “they have found true love and I never will”. What if a baby looked at another baby and said, “Well they learned to walk in 2 days I guess I will crawl the rest of my life”? I dare say the majority of us would not be on two feet. So you have already proven to yourself you can persist.

Here is one more example courtesy of the salesman. Have you ever had a salesman knock on your door when you were home? You ignore him but he keeps knocking. You look over at your spouse and say “can you believe this fool? He is still there?” More time goes by and more knocking. Finally you give in and yell “What do you want?!” A lot of us give up after one or two knocks. We here opportunity inside watching TV but we say to ourselves “Oh well opportunity must have slipped out the back door, I’ll just go home”. I am telling you, just keep knocking! Eventually life will give in and simply ask “What do you want?!” Remember the words of the Bronx Bomber, “It is hard to beat the man who won’t give up”. It is not only hard, it is impossible. You may fail several times, but you are only a failure if you give up.

Please share this post and give faith and hope to those who may be tempted to give up. Feel free to leave your favorite example of persistence in the comments below.

THE MOST EXCITING P WORD!

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What do you think of when you see the word passion? Is it time with the one you love? That certainly is one kind of passion, but not the one we are discussing here today. We are going to talk about the passion that drives you. The one you get out of bed for. The one that keeps you going when things get tough. You do have something like that in your life, right? Don’t worry if you had to answer no to that last question we are going to discuss how to fill your life with passion.

First let us ask ourselves the very important question “What is passion?”. Simply stated passion is your why behind what you do. Think of a subject that generally excites you. Now try to list why it excites you. What is so important to you about that subject. Same for goals you are trying to accomplish. Why are you trying to accomplish them? What makes it so important? You should be doing this with every goal you set. Creating passion gives us fuel and drive to stay focused and track. This holds true not only for our goals, but for our life as well. Begin to think of things you are passionate about and how you can include a few in your life at regular intervals. This gives you something to be excited about and something to look forward to.

So how does one develop passion? The first we touched on already, discover the why. You say you would like to be rich, but why? “So I wouldn’t have to work anymore” only drives us so far. Now, things like having the freedom to spend my time doing whatever I want, whenever I want to, or being able to support causes that are important to me and make the world a better place. Those create more passion. Another little known way to increase passion is to increase knowledge about anything. The more you know the easier it is to be excited about things. So spend some time learning about the things you are passionate about or about your goals and watch your passion soar.

Please feel free to share this post and let us create a world of people full of passion. Also feel free to share what you are passionate about below in the comments

THIS COULD BE THE MOST IMPORTANT P WORD OF ALL TIME

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Today’s ‘P’ word may not be that easy to guess by the picture. It may, however, be the most important word in your life. As I sit here typing in the local coffee shop I am debating how to fit all of the information about this word in a short blog. Know what you read here will be expanded upon in my upcoming book Living the Dream. Still this word will change your life. It will act as an internal compass giving your life direction. It will automatically give you a sense of what is right and wrong for you to do. It will even help you decide what is worth spending your time and energy on.

In my own life let me share with you what this word has done for me. It has eliminated the small stresses in life that used to bother me. It has given me an excitement for life that I didn’t have before. It has allowed me to feel like I am being a use to the world and to my fellow man. The negativity that surrounds my day job at the post office seem to become comical. Most importantly though for me is every day I wake up I have a drive and a direction to go in. It gives me a reason to get out of bed, and for those of you who know me that can be a challenge. We won’t even mention what I am like before my first cup of coffee.

Ok, what one word could possibly do all of this and how can you get in on it? Here is the good news, this word comes to you free and clear. The only requirement is a little bit of soul searching which ends up being pretty fun anyway. This word that can do all of that and more is PURPOSE. How can purpose do all that? Let me try to explain in brief. Here is my life purpose. To help others see the beauty in themselves and the world around them, including the people they share it with. Finding your sense of purpose can tell you if you are doing things that are a waste of your time and energy or not. Does it bring you closer to your purpose or not? For me if what I am doing does not help others see the beauty in themselves and the world around them than I am not using my time and energy correctly. It also helps me with my morals. If I were to do something that would go against people seeing the beauty in themselves or the world around them that would be defined as a sin in my world.

Here is a few things about purpose. You do not have to change jobs to live your passion, although you may find yourself heading down that path after a while. For example, my job at the post office puts me in touch with a lot of people and I do my best to make their days brighter and let them know good things about themselves. I also purchased a motivational calendar for the break room to help set a better mood. Still I find myself devoting a greater amount of time and energy to this blog, my next book and seminars. Which is how I found myself part of the Wisconsin author festival pictured above. Another thing about purpose is that it should be something bigger than yourself. It may very well include yourself as in the example above, but not exclusively.

So how does one go about discovering their passion? There are  many sites and books devoted to the topic and I would recommend exploring the ones that speak to you. Also creating a simple life mission statement like the one I had for my life earlier in this post goes a long way. There is a free tool to help you do so on http://www.nightingale.com Also think of things that interested you as a child. This can also leave clues as to what may be your life’s purpose. Hobbies are another great source that one can explore their purpose as well. Again this is just the tip of the iceberg when discussing this subject.

Please feel free to share your life’s purpose in the comments below as well as how knowing it has improved your life. PLEASE share this post anyway you can. If more people in this world find their life’s purpose the world will be a better place for all of us.

MASTERMIND

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My bio was recently posted on the West Allis library Facebook page for the Wisconsin authors festival event I am going to do next Saturday.  Feel free to stop by, check it out and comment if you like.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=793830877388460&substory_index=0&id=326342164137336

I am so excited to do this. One of the reasons is being around like-minded people. One of the keys to success I believe is finding and associating with at least one other person who is traveling the same road you are. Our friends and family can be great sources of support and encouragement, but it is my opinion you should have someone on the professional path you are on. My lovely lady in the picture above is amazing in so many ways. At the event above we were not as busy as we had hoped, but not only did she keep my spirits up, she also was great company. She is also very creative and in business for herself. We recently had a great conversation about small projects verses big projects. I am working on my next book and the difference in writing that verses writing these blog posts is interesting. We discussed the difference for her in making specialty cupcakes verses creating someone’s wedding cake. The challenges on bigger projects and the stress that goes with them is greater, but the reward and sense of building something great is also greater.

As awesome as this conversation was, and to be honest how pretty much all of ours have been, writing is an area she cannot 100% relate to. Interestingly enough we are going to do a project together and that very well may change, but for the time being writing a book is something she has not done. Interestingly enough we met some of her former coworkers for coffee and they discussed crafts, creating scarfs and hats for homeless people out of piles of yarn. Something yours truly will never be able to do. Which is ok. We can both relate to each other about creating projects, but I think it is wonderful that we both have people to discuss details with that neither of us can fully understand. I think having that balance is important and vital to success. So today begin to form your ‘mastermind group’. Include a mix of people who both support you personally and can relate to you professionally. You will be glad you did.

TAKE A BITE OUT OF LIFE!

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What is this a picture of? Some of you may say it is a picture of a sandwich with a bite out of it. True, but not exactly. It is much more than that. Let me tell you what this picture symbolizes. First, a little background on the picture. It is indeed a sandwich, in a plastic bag with a bite out of it. My lovely lady made me this sandwich to take to my day job which is with the United States Postal Service. She had it put in a bag along with a few other items.

Ok, so I know what must be on your mind at this point, why the bite? For those of you sensitive to romantic situations this would be a good time to stop reading. Although we have the great fortune of working together 4 nights a week and spending another working in the same building time apart happens far too often for our liking. This day we had a great morning working out at the gym together, we had went to a winter market a few days before and were just generally enjoying the time we were sharing. So my lady being as sweet as she is decided to help me save some time on my morning routine of getting ready. Which, I must confess often resembles the fury of activity and speed displayed by a Nascar pit crew, by packing me a lunch. That was a very sweet gesture and one that I did appreciate oh so much. Plus, it gave me a healthy alternative to the sugar filled junk in our lunch room.

So what on earth is with the bite already? Ok, here is the romantic thing. We both mentioned how we were having such an enjoyable time with each other that we found it particularly difficult to be apart that day. So after she made my lunch, she took a bite out of my sandwich so I would remember who made it. Ok, so yes it may seem mushy and overly romantic to some of you, but I found it rather cute. The point of all of this is that the littlest of things can mean the most. My mom used to pack me lunches on occasion when I was in school. It was very nice of them in both cases, but my lady went a little further. That little act of silliness and thoughtfulness stuck with me so much I not only took a picture, but I still think of it to this day.

So if you would like to increase the romance and little things in your relationship, feel free to share this with your partner and start thinking of little things you can do for them. You do not need to buy a new car or an expensive gift to have your partner fall in love with you (Although honey, if you are holding out on giving me a new car feel free) all you have to do is show them you thought about them and you care. Feel free to share this with anyone else you know, or on your social media page. Also feel free to leave romantic things that you and your partner do for each other in the comments below so other readers can try them as well.

 

WHY GIVE AWAY YOUR CONTROL AND POWER?!

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Last post we looked at what not to do in life. There were 3 things to avoid which gave us three things to do. If you missed that post I highly recommend you take a look at it. The second of the things to avoid on that list was ‘Blame others for your problems’. I told you that I would tell you the dreadful thing that it does for you. Here is the thing, when you point the finger at others realize in addition to saying “It is your fault” You are also saying “you control me”.

What do I mean by this? If someone angers you it is because you decided to let that happen. The only person who is responsible for your emotions is you. If a complete stranger walked up to you on the street and said “I do not like you” it would not make you feel good, but you would probably just shrug it off and keep going. If a good friend of yours walked up and told you the same thing it may be crushing. Same thing on the positive side. If a complete stranger tells you that they find you attractive it will make you feel good for sure, but if the person you have been with for years tells you “You still take my breath away every time I look at you” That can certainly have more of an impact. Why is this? Because even though the words and the actions are the same you decided one means more than the other.

Same goes with blame. If it is another person’s fault that you failed or have problems, then what control do you have over fixing them? In any situation we have played some role. We also can determine that others actions will not stop us. Sure they can delay or sidetrack us, but then it is up to us to work harder, stay determined and not fail. Same with success. If we are eager to assign blame, what about credit? How likely are you to say about your recent life victory “Well really it wasn’t me, I had nothing to do with it”? You do not want to give someone else the credit for all of your hard work, so do not let them take the blame for your problems. When you accept your role in the negative things that happen in your life it tends to be liberating. You have a sense of control and with control comes a feeling of hope. If you got yourself into the mess, you can get yourself out. If you point the finger at others and say it is there fault you feel different. There is almost a sense of helplessness or at the very least a lack of control. If they caused this problem in your life, what is to say they won’t do it again? They might even cause some other problem in your life. What about all the other people in the world? Could they cause problems for you?

So here is the takeaway, assume responsibility for your problems and then set about to correct them. Notice the sense of freedom and control you feel. In fact, in every issue try to find something that was your fault. This may seem counter productive, but trust me it will lead to a feeling of more self control and power over your own life.

This is my take on life. I would love to hear how this works in your life as well as any other issues you would like to discuss here. If you enjoyed this please like/share/comment to your heart’s content.

WHAT NOT TO DO!

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I love this post because it points out something very important, there is a recipe for both success and failure. If you do the three things mentioned above life will suck, period. Number one, complain about everything, does little to change anything for the better. What it does do is put our focus on what is not working. This in itself is not a bad thing, we need to focus on what is not working in order to be able to correct it. However, complaining is seldom if ever solution oriented. It is actually totally useless. In fact, it is worse than totally useless. When you complain for a long period of time you are thinking and vocalizing what is wrong in your life, with the world, or with someone else you think should be living differently. You leave the conversation feeling worse than when you started. As for anyone who is listening to you they also feel worse and very well may look to avoid conversations with you in the future. This would only add to the negative and thus, life would suck more

Number two, blaming others for your problems we will deal with in the next post. What we can say about it here is that it often leads to number one. It also contributes to number three. Worse it does something that makes you feel even worse, but again we will discuss that tomorrow.

Number three, never be grateful, is a joy killer. When you fail to appreciate what you have in life, that leaves you to focus on what you do not have. How does this leave you feeling? Like your life is a state of lack. You always feel that your life is missing something. That also would suck.

So at the risk of this sounding negative this post also gives us the recipe for success. How? In the face of every negative situation, there is the seed of a positive one. In this case just do the opposite of those three. Reduce the amount of complaining you do and focus on what is going right and how to solve what is not working. Accept responsibility for your role in your life’s problems, and always, always find something to be grateful for. Those are the three ways to succeed in life.

If you found this read helpful or inspiring please feel free to share/like and comment. Tell all your friends about secret2anamazinglife.com Let us all work together to make the work a more positive place.

YOU DECIDE WHAT IT MEANS!!!

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I’m VERY excited to be writing this post. This is a picture that my lady posted on Facebook. I fell in love with it right away, much like I did with her. Here is the powerful thing about this, it points out a very important thing that many of us do not utilize. We can control what things in life mean to us. What it is often perceived as a negative experience can often be the greatest of all lessons and motivate us further. If you look at words they have a powerful impact on how we feel. When someone says you ‘FAIL’ it makes us feel bad, but if you ask any successful person they suggest you should embrace failure. Why? because when you fail, you are getting one step closer to succeeding. In fact, if we never fail, we would never learn anything. We would never grow. If we change our definition to “first attempt at learning” we can better understand how it can help us grow.

‘END’ is another word that can make us feel down. A job comes to an end, we can feel like we did something wrong. Only if we give up. If we change our definition to “effort never dies” it encourages us to keep going. So next time we are told we have come to an end, let us not accept that. If that door closes, let us go on looking for another which may very well open up into a room full of new opportunities that we may never have encountered.

How about when we have been pushing and doing our best and someone tells us ‘NO’? We must not accept that as a final word. In my own life I have faced many ‘NOs’. Each one has had me feel let down. From now on, thanks to my beautiful Margie, I will understand that is just means “Next opportunity”. In my professional career I have been pushed to new jobs, new people and new gifts and talents I would not have discovered had I not lost the position that I had previously. In my personal life, a lot of ‘FAIL’ ‘END’ and ‘NO’ has changed my life for the better more than anything else.

If you like this as much as I did, thank Margie and feel free to like/comment/share with others!

WHY YOU SHOULD BE KIND AND NOT AN ASS

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This post was inspired while having lunch with my lady, my friend Gail and her son. Gail was mentioning how people routinely come up to her and mention certain things she has done that have really touched them. If you were to ever meet Gail you would find this easy to believe as she has a very good energy and spirit about her. The funny thing is the same thing happens to my lovely Margie and myself quite often. Just last night a gentleman thanked Margie for making him get out and be social. People often remember me as the “Friendly guy from the post office”. Sometimes things end up a little more intense. Considering the kind of work I am involved in there are occasions when tools I have passed on, or just different ways to look at the world have inspired people and helped them take the actions necessary to turn their lives around.

It always reminds me of the importance of being kind. You never know when what you say, be it a kind word or an inspiring idea that can have a great impact on their lives. You never know if someone may be going through a challenge we know nothing about. What you say may inspire them to follow their dreams and become a blessing to so many others. Imagine what the world would be like if Einstein never pursued his passion? Being Jewish in the World War two era he could have easily just become bitter and walked away. You have heard me mention Walt Disney who was rejected by over 300 bankers before being approved for a loan for Disneyland. In addition to strong personal power I believe these people must have had a person or two who inspired them along the way. Einstein himself said that he used to say “thank you” over 100 times a day.

So what about the second half of the title of this post? The reason why you should watch what you say especially in times of great emotional upset is this, you never know who is listening. You could shatter someone’s dream and they may give up and never go on to bring their gifts to the world. We may lost the next Walt Disney, or the next great doctor, scientist or author. Your seemingly foolish comment may give someone a complex for the rest of their lives, or worse push them over the edge in a battle they have been fighting.

So the point is this, use kind words and encouragement often, and do your best to swallow your criticism and angry words. If you wish to encourage more people feel free to like/share and comment on this post. Together we can turn the world into a better place for all.

CHANGE…IT’S A GOOD THING!

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I hear a lot of people complaining about change.  Last post we talked about the importance of learning.  Today we are going to discuss why you need to keep changing and why that is a good thing. When I hear people who say they dislike change or who are even afraid of change I feel compelled to ask them why. The answers fall into a category something like “I just wish everything would stay like it was” or they tend to focus on things in the world that have changed for the worse.

I will tackle the first argument this way. Ok, if things never changed I would love for you to ride a horse to work today. When you get there try using a computer that would only store so much data before you had to remove one of those floppy disks and start over. I even remember having to wait for nights and weekends because they were cheaper to use on my cell phone. Medical treatments have certainly become more advanced. I don’t think any of us would want to check into a hospital where they are using medical practices from the dark ages.

So what about the second point that change can often bring about negative results? That is always true to some extent. We mentioned the medical field before. While new knowledge there has saved countless lives I think the new ‘pill pushing’ paradigm is the wrong way to go. Still I wouldn’t sacrifice the knowledge gained. This was brought home by a conversation I had with a coworker at my job at the post office. “I don’t use the internet. All they have on there is porn and other garbage. I have lived this long without it, I don’t need it now”. On one had he is right. There is a lot of garbage on the internet and a fair amount of adult entertainment, or at least that is what I heard. Still this man is an avid bicyclist and could learn a great deal about that. There are also search engines for any questions you may have. YouTube videos that show you everything from preparing your dish, to secrets to improving your life. The latter of which can be found on my channel under “Neil Panosian”. My point here is this, if we look at the negative side of change it becomes something to fear at the most extreme or at the very least something unpleasant at best. If we focus on everything we gain from change it becomes something far more encouraging.

If you know someone who fears change feel free to share this with them. In fact, feel free to share this post with anyone and everyone. If there is any issue you would like addressed in this blog feel free to list your question in the comments and it could be featured in an upcoming post.