Tomorrow is my favorite holiday – Thanksgiving! It is a celebration of all we are grateful 🙏 for. We can get so fixated on what needs fixing in our lives, we can often overlook what is working.
Today, let’s take a second, at the very least, to look around and take stock of what IS working and what we have to be grateful for. If you were to spend 5 minutes a day on this activity, it will change your life. Living in gratitude has so many amazing benefits it would take another post to list. DON’T trust me on this one. Try it for yourself.
Today, at least in part of the country, we celebrate Sweetest Day. It is a holiday that started in Ohio in 1921. It was started as a way to encourage women to treat their male romantic partners with sweets and candy. This really wouldn’t work in my case as I am not a huge fan of sweets and candy. This is a good thing when you live with a woman who is an amazing baker. I fear if I was a big fan, I would be bigger than my house right now. The holiday has expanded in recent years to include showing love and appreciation to anyone in your life. This includes family, friends as well as significant others.
I am going to take it one step further. I think we should show love and appreciation for everything sweet in our life. Right now, I am sitting in the sun, with a nice cup of coffee typing away. To me, this is a very sweet situation. I was recently asked to speak in front of a congregation for a church I do not even attend. That was also pretty sweet. I have a job that pays me a pretty good wage. Not exactly what I want to be doing, but still it is pretty sweet that I am employed. I have great friends that care about me. I have three books that I can use to reach and inspire people I do not even know. This particular blog is viewed by over 100,000 people in over 200 countries. That is sweet!
Many people just cynically say things like, “Oh, that is just a Hallmark holiday.” As a note, although the holiday started in 1921, Hallmark did not start making Sweetest Day cards until the 1960s. I am sure confectionaries and floral shops have a vested interest in keeping holidays like this alive, but who cares? Instead of dismissing something as an example of corporate greed, why not put it to use in our own lives? Why not use this holiday to fill our lives with more joy and love?
Here is another way to do so. In addition to thinking of all the things that may be sweet in your life, how about thinking of how many different ways things are sweet? Above are pictures of my beautiful lady, Margie. How many ways is she sweet? In addition to the fact that she is often covered in powdered sugar from baking, there are so many ways she is sweet. The first picture is of her sweet smile. It always melts my heart and brings a smile to it as well. The second is one of the million silly faces she makes. Not only does she always look cute as can be, but I am happy she shares them with me. That is quite sweet! The third one reminds me of her sweet kisses. Some of the best medicine that money can’t even buy! Sweeter kisses? I don’t know of any. The fourth and last picture is of her after one of her tough workouts that she does. Keeping herself healthy and working hard on herself? That is sweet indeed! Those were just 4 things about my amazing lady. I would share more, but I am already going to be in trouble for posting these four pictures. There are so many sweet things about her, I could go on for hours. That, in and of itself, is something sweet!
It doesn’t have to be your significant other. It can be your child, your friend. It can be a coworker or someone who means a lot to you. Here is the great thing, it doesn’t even have to be a person! It can be your favorite place to relax. It can be a park or beach you really like. It can be your favorite book. It can be your favorite coffee. There are so many things in life that are sweet. If we think about even a few of them and ponder what we love and appreciate about them, guess how we will be feeling? You guessed it, pretty sweet! I would love to hear some of what you find sweet in your life! Forget the cynical view of a Hallmark holiday. Use this to fill your heart with love, appreciation and gratitude!
One of the saddest things that seems to happen as we age is that we lose an appreciation for the magic and beauty of life. It is no surprise. When we are young, most of the things we are exposed to offer an encouraging motif. Think of children’s programing. Most of it is a blend of encouragement of teaching and encouraging. I recall shows like Sesame Street and Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood when I was young. I learned a lot, but there were also positive messages about myself, others and the world around me.
What happens as we get older? What we are exposed to takes a decidedly negative shift. News, crime shows, content on the internet and even that sent to our phones. Is the answer to stop using technology? Limiting our use of it may help somewhat, but that will not save us from interacting with other people. What are these other people exposed to? That’s right. The same negative influences we just mentioned. If you even attempt to be a light in this dark world, you will often be looked at as strange, weird or delusional. People will tell you things such as “You are looking at the world through rose-colored glasses.” or my favorite, “You just have your head in the sand. Can’t you see how bad the world is?”
What can we do to remedy this malady? Start doing something we may have stopped doing in childhood. That is looking for the beauty and magic that is all around us! It may not get the press and attention, but it is there. On social media, try subscribing to positive news stories and motivational pages. On your cell phone, download apps that send you motivational quotes everyday. These things really do exist! As for the sunshine-challenged people we share the planet with? Know most of them have just lost their ability to see the magic all around them. When they give you a crazy look or attack you, pity them. There life is one stuck in the darkness. In addition, add people who have the opposite mindset. Spend as much time around them as possible!
When you are looking to improve your life, it is always easer to add the positive than to eliminate the negative. You might want to read that line again. If you are trying to eat healthier, it would be easier to add a healthy meal than to starve yourself of meals that are not so healthy. The more you fill up on healthy food, the less room you will have for junk food. The same is true with everything in life. The more time you spend reading or listening to something inspiring is that much less time you could find yourself exposed to negativity. Adding smiles? Less time frowning. One minute of laughter? 60 seconds less of anger!
In regards to today’s post, spend more time actively looking for beautiful things in life. The more time you spend doing so, the less time you will spend noticing and dwelling on the negative. That doesn’t mean you are ‘burying your head in the sand’ and pretending they don’t exist. No, you are simply choosing not to dwell on them. As an example, above is my coffee as it was served to me at the pick up window at Starbucks. Not sure which employee took the time to do this, but it added a little brightness to my day. As I was in that sunny mood, I noticed the dandelion growing through a crack in the pavement right next to a dumpster. Proof that there is always a little light in the darkness. When we are children, we don’t have to look for the magic. It seems to show up at every turn. As adults, we need to train ourselves to get back to that. This may mean a little concentrated effort searching for the beauty in life. Done enough, it will start to show up in your life everywhere.
Another great idea is to keep images around you that remind you of the beauty you have and are currently experiencing in your own life. Above is a sample of mine. Great times with the beautiful love of my life, Margie. My mom celebrating Octoberfest. There is fun times watching a pig race at the Wisconsin State Fair and a very beautiful and loving sentiment that Margie wrote in the sand while we were enjoying time away in Jamaica. This not only reminds me of the beauty and magic in my life, it adds what could be the most powerful thing to create an amazing life. That one thing is gratitude. How could I not be grateful for all of these things? Being grateful and looking for all the beauty that is around us will positively transform our lives. Next post we will learn how to take all of this information and not only help others transform their lives, but create an almost automatic way to fill our lives with these things! Please come back tomorrow to learn all of that!
Here is a point worth pondering. Many of us who are in survival mode fail to recognize, or take advantage of, the opportunities to do good. If your focus is to just wake up, go to work and pay the bills, you are missing out on a large portion of life. My fourth book, which will be released late 2023/early 2024, will be focusing on switching our life from surviving to thriving. One of the best ways to do that is by acting and not reacting to life. If you assume that if you are not doing harm, you are therefore doing good, that is only half of the story.
It was this very thought that gave me a brilliant idea. I was searching for how to put my gift to the best use. As an author and writer, the ways in which I can do good seemed somewhat limited. As quickly as that thought came, it was replaced by one that removed those limits. My good did not have to be limited to donating books to local cancer centers. Although that was one of the more rewarding aspects of my writing career. No, by using the products I had created, I was able to raise money for two wonderful causes.
I hosted a book signing. 100% of the profits from the sale of my books was given as a donation to two wonderful local charities. This, along with money from donation buckets we had set up and a generous donation from the establishment hosting the event, allowed us to really make a difference. When all was said and done, we were able to donate $250 to W.I.S.H. (Women Initiate self-healing and hope) Which is a group that supports victims of domestic violence by hosting support meetings as well as providing them some essentials needed for these ladies who were forced to start their lives over.
In addition, we were able to donate another $250 to Rescue Gang. This is a group that not only rescues animals, provides them the medical attention they need, but also has a network of foster families that care for these animals until a forever home can be found for them. It is sad that animals cannot raise their voices for help, and that we must serve as that voice.
Handing over checks to these two amazing and hard-working ladies (Thank you Holly and Jennifer) was a very rewarding experience. It did open my eyes to the many possibilities still out there. Not only for me, but for you as well. What is your gift? Have you discovered all of the ways in which you can use it? If you are a person that does siding, you could not only assist on helping to provide siding to a local church, but could donate a portion of your sales to help other causes near and dear to your heart. You could reserve a spot of your delivery truck or website to a deserving local charity. Again, the possibilities are endless. Not only are the ways to help countless, so are the groups that need our help. My challenge for you today is to find one of the groups you passionately believe in and then brainstorm on ways you can use your gifts and talents to help them. Working together, we can make a big difference in supporting those who make our world a better place.
This post will share with a train you can hop aboard and ride into a more positive and fulfilling life! The great thing is this train runs in your neighborhood and it runs everyday. You can catch it no matter who you are. A ticket to this train? It costs nothing other than a bit of your time!
This idea came from a very close source, my lovely Margie. Margie, my mother and I were returning from a nice lunch when we were stopped by a train. My mother expressed frustration that she always seemed to find herself being stopped by trains. We have all been there. It seems to happen when we are in a hurry.
Being stopped by a train when you really have somewhere to be, or when nature is calling, can have you feeling like the fellow above we can’t control when a train comes, and in some cases, we can’t even go around them. It can leave you feeling exasperated and quiet helpless. Luckily, my lovely lady had a brilliant solution!
Margie, who was in the back seat, said, “I use the time I wait for trains to focus on what I’m grateful for.” As the cars rolled by all three of us pondered this. After what seemed to be an eternity, my mom mentioned, “This is one long train!” After a few seconds of reflection, I countered, “Maybe it is because all of us have so much to be grateful for?” We all concured and thought of the blessings in our life as the cars rolled by.
This may seem like a simple and insignificant action,but it accomplishes two wonderful things at once. First, it adds an extra moment of focusing on everything that we have in our lives. This, by default, removes 60 seconds of focusing on what we lack. The second amazing thing focusing on what you have to be grateful for while stopped by a train does is to transform a formerly stressful situation into a moment of self-care. You will leave the train crossing feeling happier and more abundant than when the flashing red lights started and the gates came down.
Many of us feel a mid-week slump. The stress of the work week is getting to us. Perhaps a lack of sleep is beginning to stack up. How do we counter these feelings? By pausing for a little Wednesday gratitude. Switching our focus from how tired and exhausted we may feel, to what we have to be grateful for will energize us and get us back in the game.
Gratitude can do many things. It will force us to breathe and bring us a moment of inner peace. That is very important in the middle of the week. It will also remind us of how amazing our life trulyis. Even if it is just being able to read these words of encouragement and inspiration.
If you really want to have a bonus, pick one, or several, people and share gratitude with them. You could do this by telling them why you are grateful for them, or even asking what they are grateful for. Creating an atmosphere of gratitude will only improve your life as we finish out the week!
We have all heard the story about chicken little. He runs around yelling everyone the sky is falling. I’m sure most of us know people that fit this category. I want to share a recent story with you about the sky falling in my life.
This past week had been a busy one. Wednesday I ran a 5k. I really don’t run so that was something. Woke up feeling a little sore the next day. I thought I would do my best to take it easy at work. That day the city dropped off a dump truck full of mulch for me to spread. The put it conveniently 100 yards away from where I needed to spread it. I worked on this Thursday, Friday and Saturday. By Saturday night I was ready to collapse in Margie’s arms. That was not to be…
We came home from dinner to discover it was raining…in our spare bedroom! Bits of plaster and paint were decorating our floor. We both were exhausted, but what could we do? Taking turns running with mops and buckets 🪣 we stayed up most of the night and got up early the next morning. So much for a relaxing day off.
Actual picture of our ceiling
Have you ever had one of those days when you think you have reached your limit, only to find the sky is falling? What do we do then? We could be like our friend chicken little, running around telling everyone the sky is falling. You could also do what Margie and I did, we focused on what we could control.
What did this focusing on what we could control get us? Due to the repairs needing to be done we worked together to reorganize our house. Then Margie’s daughter came over to help us out. Finally, my mother invited us over for dinner so we wouldn’t have to cook. Further proof, gratitude can save the day even if your sky is falling!
Today is Friday, the end of the week! Let us go into the weekend strong. What I mean by that is to really appreciate the now. How can we accomplish this? Today, let us focus on one thing we are grateful 🙏 for this week.
What happened that you are thankful for? Did you reach a goal you have been chasing? Did you get closer to accomplishing something you have been working on? Did you brighten someone’s day? Maybe you are just grateful to have made it through the week?
Now, let us add one thing you are grateful for this weekend in advance (this is also known as looking forward to using the law of attraction) It could be time with your spouse or family. Perhaps working on that passion project? Enjoying some peace and reflection while enjoying a good book?
Personally, I am grateful for completing a 5k with the love of my life, enjoying a dinner with a good friend and accomplishingsome things at work. This weekend I am going to have coffee ☕️ with a good friend. Looking forward to the conversation there. Margie and I have some relaxing plans.How about you? What are you grateful for this week and what are you thankful for in advance this weekend? Share your joy with us!😃
With a website called Secret2anamazinglife, I am asked countless times, “What is the secret to an amazing life?” It is not really one secret. In fact, none of this is secret. A little effort will open up to you a world that contains magic we were previously unaware of. I know this is hard to explain waiting at a red light, in line at a coffee shop and, believe it or not, once while attending to some business in a men’s room. In the world we live in, people want a quick answer. Some ‘magic pill’ that will turn their life around. We have good news and bad news on that subject.
First the bad news. In the big pharma based world we live in, there is no life-transforming pill. At best, there will be one that chemically alters you to be in an emotional state to better approach, or care less, about your problems. Drugs, alcohol and even food can be used to mask and compensate for the pain of life. Very inspiring so far, isn’t it? I told you there was good news. There is one thing that can radically transform your life, and do so quickly. How do I know? It worked in mine. That one thing is gratitude.
I know. I know. You have heard it a million times. Being grateful is the key to success. Oprah says it. Steve Jobs said it. Tony Robbins said it. How can just being thankful for everything you have it life, including the challenges, make such a difference? Look at the first photo in this post. Gratitude can affect many areas of our life. Here is what I am going to tell you about gratitude. Don’t believe me. Here is how I discovered the power of being grateful. I was challenged to do a gratitude journal for 30 days. I accepted the challenge with the intent I would show this person that it would not work for me. By the end of one week I felt something, but I didn’t know what it was. By the end of two weeks I was feeling happier and looking forward to life more, but it could have been a run of good luck. By the end of 30 days I was so happy that I was annoying myself.
What happened when I was in this divine state? I was in a terrible car accident. I went through the windshield and woke up in the hospital. It was as if the universe was either testing my resolve or showing me how powerful this gratitude thing could be. If you want to hear the whole story, I suggest reading my book, A Happy Life for Busy People. To say that being grateful helped me through one of the most trying times in my life would be an understatement.
Don’t take my word for it, or the science that gave us the facts above. Prove it to yourself. I am going to put forth the same challenge that was given to me. Keep a gratitude journal for 30 days. All this means is writing down at least 3 things you are grateful for everyday and why. You can do this in a spiral notebook. You do not have to tell a single soul you are doing it. Be prepared to be asked what changed in you though. By the end of 30 days, if done faithfully, you will know why I consider gratitude the ‘magic pill’ of life transformation. If you want to know more about the power of gratitude exercises, read my book, Living the Dream. I look forward to hearing from all of you who take up this challenge. If you are interested in picking up a copy of any of my books, just click the link below.
Recently, Margie set up a coffee date with another couple. She has a knack for picking some good people. In the course of a very inspiring conversation, my new friend and teacher, CJ, said something I think will impact us all. What he said was not only profound, but will add to our lives. It is something we should all wake up to that will positively impact our lives.
We were discussing perspective and how it drives performance. He relayed something he had heard that he uses to help keep his life in proper perspective. Enough with the build up. What was it that CJ said that I think will be so impactful for us all? It was this simple question. “If you would only wake up with only what you were grateful for the night before, how much would you wake up with?” When I heard this, it struck me. How about you? When you think about all of the blessings we have that we do not take the time to stop and be grateful for, how many do they number? I don’t know about you, but they are near countless for me.
Let us look at a few quick examples to help drive the point home. There is, of course, the love of my life, Margie. There are times when we are not seeing eye to eye. We do our best to never go to bed that way, but sometimes it happens. When you and your special someone go to sleep, whether you are getting along or not, do you pause and take a moment to be grateful for them? We are talking about focused gratitude. What if you were to wake up and they were gone forever? How about throughout the course of a day? Margie gives me plenty of reasons to be grateful. Whether that is sending me silly messages about rockets while I am busy at work, or having a delicious home-cooked meal to come home to, there are always reasons to be grateful for. Because they happen so often, I have to be careful not to take them for granted.
The person you love is an easy example. There are others. What about where you live? It could not be in the neighborhood you desire. Your house could need lots of work, or maybe your rent or mortgage eats up most of your paycheck. It is easy to complain about those things, but what if you woke up homeless tomorrow? How about work? That’s a good one. Work is easy to complain about it. I am as guilty as anyone when it comes to that. Waking up early, time away from family, crazy bosses and coworkers. There are a million things to complain about. What if they told you tomorrow you were out of a job? Suddenly, all of those things you were complaining about you would be grateful to have in your life.
Ask yourself this question, “If you were to wake up with only the things you were grateful for the night before, what would you wake up with?” I think that is a powerful question that can not only change our perspective, but help us live a life filled with more gratitude and a lot less lack. I know that I am going to put this question to use in my life. How about you? Once again, shout out to CJ and Faith for a great time over coffee.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 