Last post we mentioned the quote from Tony Robbins that “What is wrong is always available. So is what is right.” Some of us have a challenge developing a grateful mindset. Doing so is the secret to living an amazing life. One of the easiest ways of doing this is to look around at the lives of those less fortunate. We do not have to look very far. The news is full of tragedy of both a personal and geographical nature. It blows my mind how upset with life some people can be. They lament how unfair life is or how hard they have it. If you can read these words, you have it better than millions of others. You are literate. That means you have the potential to learn just about anything. You have access to the internet. Which again means you can learn just about anything.
Gandhi’s thought above is a really bold statement. The late Greg Plitt, who continues to inspire, said “If you feel unmotivated to change your life, take a walk through the cancer ward at a children’s hospital.” That is an uncomfortable statement. The reason that it is so uncomfortable is that it forces us to realize how much greater our challenges can be. This is not to say whatever you are going through is not tough. Many of you are facing challenges greater than anything I have ever faced. It just reminds us that there are others who are struggling worse than us and could use our support and compassion.
Sticking with the gent from India, this is a great next step. When we see those folks who remind us that our situation could be worse. We should reach out and lend a hand. It is what will not only make their challenge a little less. It will help us gain the knowledge that even in our most challenging of times, we can be of service to others. We not only can be, but we should be. It is in doing so that we often discover our greatest gifts and talents. This can give us the confidence and purpose to make it through our own challenges. It is a win/win situation. It is how the world should be.
Today is a momentous day! I turn the big 5-0. People have been asking me how it feels to turn 50. To be honest, it feels surreal. Certainly, it does not feel like I am reaching a milestone. To me, especially after my brief flirtation with death, life should be lived daily. To look back and think that I have been on this planet for half of a century does seem incredible. There are so many milestones that have yet to be reached. Marriage will arrive in 2027 to my beautiful Margie. Still looking to retire to a warm climate. Heck, I am still looking to retire. Have not made the best-seller list yet but book four will be arriving soon.
The quote above is my favorite quote of all time. Every year, I learn more what it means. Sure, I understand it intellectually, but learn more about it emotionally with every experience I have. Being the change you want to see in the world means different things to different people. To me, it means changing the world in the only way we are able, that is by changing ourselves. When my journey into self-improvement began it was with a wish that the world was a more positive place. As we sit here on the 29th of July in 2025, we have a long way to go to meet that end. Do you know what is positive? My world! As mentioned, I have what is to me the most beautiful and loving woman in the world. I have great friends and family who lend me support.
The way that my world has improved is by following one of my new favorite quotes, which is the one by Marcus Aurelius. Being a good man, or woman, means treating others with dignity and respect. It means living with honesty and integrity. When you live like this, others respect you and start treating you with kindness and compassion. Life really is a self-fulfilling prophecy. It has taken me 50 years to figure much of this out, but I am going to share as much of it as I can, to as many as I can, so all may learn what it has taken me a lifetime to learn.
As birthdays seem to add up, you can’t help but think of the legacy you are leaving behind. To me the best legacy is one of good character and example. Sharing the knowledge and experiences you have gone through. Learning from the pain and the growth it has forced you to endure. By sharing this with others it also gives purpose to your pain, making it a little easier to make it through. At 50 I have made through many loses and struggles. Still have many more to make it through. Each one, I ask myself, “How can I use this to serve others?” It has help me make through being one of the first people in my state to get Covid. (Did a series of YouTube videos to help others be less afraid) Margie reminded me to use it during my heart surgery to help others who may have to go through the same in the future. I wrote an entire book about the experience called The Beat Goes On.
How about you? On your next birthday whether it has a 0, a 5 or any other number after it, will you be any closer to the legacy you want to live? I will be releasing my fourth book this year. Today I also started the third season of my podcast, Living the Dream with Neil Panosian, on YouTube. Feel free to check that out. I also have another project that will be starting this year that I think you all will love. I continue to find ways to share knowledge with and inspire others. The sand in the hourglass continues to fall and time draws short. This only increases my sense of urgency. I hope it will do the same for you. I would love to hear what legacy you hope to leave behind.You can pick up any of my books, including the one mentioned in this post, at the link below.
Today is a big day here at Secret2anamazinglife.com! We are celebrating posting inspiring and useful content for 1000 days in a row. It took a second to decide what I was going to post on this momentous day. After all, it is one of the biggest milestones we have celebrated since reaching 10 years of content back in 2022. The idea came to me while thinking about one of my favorite inspirations, Earl Nightingale. In his autobiography, he discusses what inspired him to write The Strangest Secret, his most famous work. His thought train was, “What if I only had a short time to live? What words of advice would I give my children?”It is with this mindset that I put forth these words today.
I began to think what words would I share if I only had a short time to live. Having actually gone through that helps a little. Sitting down with a nice cup of coffee, I began to toss that thought around in my head. This is what Earl did as well before he wrote that powerful work mentioned earlier. What came to my mind is the first quote attributed to Gandhi. It is my favorite quote and one I would want the world to focus on. It would seem a thought we are drifting further away from. Rather than focus on who is to blame for all the ills of the world, or complain about them, we should be focused on the solution. I have never found blame and complaining to be part of any worthwhile solution. What is the solution? It is a simple and easy formula we have heard a million times but seldom do we really ponder it’s power in changing our world. “As you sow, so shall you reap.”
This idea was the main motivation for starting this website. Firmly believing that if you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. My lament back in 2012, when I started this site, was that there was too much negativity in the world. It seemed everywhere I looked negativity was there. Little did I know by 2025, you didn’t even have to look, it finds you! Delivered to our phones, our laptops, and our mailboxes. It comes through our email, our coworkers and often through the mouths of family and friends. Do you know what complaining about all of this negativity does? Add one more negative thing to the pile! The following year, while pursing writing my first book, I was introduced to the quote, “Better to light a single candle than curse the darkness.” What you are reading is my candle. We had lit 1000 in a row!
The key to all of this was taking action. Recently, I have really come to admire the philosophy of Stoicism. The above quote is an example why. It is simple, to the point and action driven. I have seen people argue about what the right course of action is for hours. It is far wiser to set an example with our actions. Do you want the world to be full of good humans? (which is what I am sure Marcus Aurelius meant) The only 100% guaranteed way to make sure the world begins to have better humans is to be one. Want to help the environment? You best be recycling yourself. Let us waste no more time arguing with each other what should be done. Let us pick up the shovel of our struggle and begin to dig. People may not always listen to what you say, but they will always notice your example.
In this rather long quote from Mahatma Gandhi, he is basically saying the same thing. The part of the quote that states, “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies of the world would also change.” In other words, if you find your world a little too negative for your liking, be as positive as you can. What you will find happening is the world returning your positivity in kind. Does that mean you will not face the occasional negative moment? Of course not. It will, however, become the exception instead of the rule. When you sow kindness and compassion, guess what you will reap? That’s right. You will reap kindness and compassion. You cannot plant an apple seed and expect a watermelon to grow from it. No more than you can expect the world to change for the better unless you change for the better. It is the simple equation of “What you sow, you shall reap.”
Today let us all work to be the change we wish to see in the world. Let us plant the seeds of change we wish to reap in the world around us. Seeds of compassion. Seeds of love. Seeds of positivity. Are you planting seeds or are you complaining and sending prayers to the devil, as Mr. Bob Marley so accurately put it?
As we here at Secret2anamazinglife.com chart our next horizon, be that 3000 total posts published, 3 years in a row posting or whatever else we come up with, We encourage you to be the change you wish to see in the world. Begin to plant those seeds that you wish to reap. Thank you for being part of our journey so far. We invite you to stick with us as we continue our work in helping the world be a better place than it was yesterday.
All of us here know the importance of gratitude. It can keep you in the vibration of having enough and feeling… well.. grateful. It also can help you attract what you desire quickly and efficiently.
Staying in gratitude can be a bit tricky. Especially when life does not go according to plan. There have been multiple times I’ve went to Starbucks and they haven’t had coffee. Can you imagine? The biggest coffee chain in the world, and no coffee. I’ve been on my way to work and had my exhaust ripped off by a pile of ice. You wake up to discover your allergies didn’t feel like staying at home today.
What are all these situations? First world problems. What do I mean? I can afford to go to a coffee shop and get a cup of coffee. Hell, I have access to clean water to make coffee. Even the the exhaust fix was expensive, I have a car and the job I was going to. I livewhere there is allergy medicine. Often the world gives us these challenges to remind us how good we have it most of the time. If you think your situation is bad, look around,someone always has it worse.
Today was a tough day at the day job. I had just finished what I was working on and one of my coworkers walked right through it and ruined it. This was despite the fact that I had a sign posted alerting passers-by that the section was temporarily closed. Assuming that she might be challenged when it came to literacy, I politely asked if next time she saw that sign, she could please walk around the area. In what can only be described as a very condescending time, she glared and said, “No.”
I was a bit dumbfounded as I have never treated this lady with anything but kindness and respect. I also was raised to respect everyone so her behavior was just not what I was used to. She even asked the boss later, “Why should I respect him?” Clearly, this young lady could benefit from reading my favorite book How to Win Friends and Influence People.
This is not a post about how poorly people treat one another, or how we should respect everyone. No, it is about a mistake I made following this interaction. It also is about having a system in place to address and correct that mistake.
First the mistake. I let this lady’s behavior really affect me. It rather upset my day. When the person who usually makes everyone else happy is unhappy, that didn’t help the overall vibe of the office for the day. This lady, in which should be no surprise, seemed not to care at all.
I know you should not let others control your emotional state. I even teach tools to that effect. You know what else I am? Human. That means in spite of all the knowledge I both have and teach, on occasion life will get the best of me. Especially when someone’s behavior is so out of line in catches me off guard.
Knowledge of tools for success is what saved me from the rest of this day. One of them is surrounding yourself with other people who are passionate about learning to improve themselves. Another one is to foster relationships that allow you both to share knowledge and feelings freely with each other.
To this end, I had several folks which included family, friends and more courteous coworkers, to remind me of what I already know. It is fatal to put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket.Life happens and we are all human. We will forget what we know and make mistakes. That is why it is important to surround ourselves with people who can give us that reminder of what is important and what we should be doing.
Recently, much to my dismay, I found myself back in the hospital. I began experiencing severe chest pain Sunday night. Considering it has not been that long since my open heart surgery, I went into the Emergency Room at the local hospital. There I lay for several hours as they filled me up with a vast array of pain killers, none of which seemed to do very much. I received a CT scan which showed I had fluid around my heart. A decision was made to transfer me to the hospital that my surgeon works out of so he could take a better approach at observing me.
Very early Monday morning they boxed me up in an ambulance and whisked me away to the next hospital. The ride was bumpy, but they gave me a free stuffed alligator for being a good patient. I rather enjoyed that personally. I arrived at my new digs around 6 am and was told that I could not have anything to eat or drink, including water, in case they wanted to do a test. Mind you I ate dinner around 7 the night before. This lasted until 4pm, when the doctor left for the day and it was clear they were not going to test me. In other words, it was all for nothing. Having morphine and other heavy duty pain killers in your system on an empty stomach was not very thrilling. Worse yet, they informed me at 7 pm that evening I was back to no food or water in case they wanted to test me the following day. This lasted until 11 am the following day. After persistent “Test me or give me a damn cracker!” outbursts from yours truly, the finally decided they were not going to test me for anything that day either.
My alligator from the folks at Bell Ambulance
Here I was, day three in the hospital, still in pain and nobody could give me an answer as to why. They had added an ultrasound to the CT Scan and now informed me there was no fluid around my heart. Later, a chest x-ray was added. I think this was just so they could say they did all of the imaging tests. By this time I was growing quite frustrated. Even the nurses, who were wonderful and helpful people, were also growing frustrated at the doctors lack of appearances or answers.
I stayed in the hospital 2 more days. These 4 days amounted to the same amount of time I had spent in the hospital after my open heart surgery. I had seen 3 doctors that were not even ones I go to. It was not until one of them did a little more poking around that they came to the conclusion that I had a rare condition that affects 5% of heart surgery patient. It is a sort of late onset inflammation. By the time I was going to be released, I was pretty frustrated. In addition to enduring 18 hours of no food and water one day followed by 14 hours of the same the following day for absolutely no reason, it was like pulling teeth to get answers or talk to a doctor. Then, I refocused. This was aided by 2 events, one very tragic and one pleasant.
As I was putting all of my stuff in a bag to take with me, I received a message I was not expecting. I have been out of my day job since the 11th of January because of my surgery. I just learned one of my coworkers, only a year my senior, had passed away. Little did I know that 2 months ago when I saw him, it would be the last time. Sure, I was leaving the hospital with ‘best guess’ diagnosis and treatment, but at least I was leaving. My friends and family would be happy for my return and not mourning my loss. I suddenly felt a little guilty for feeling the way I was. I am sure this man would have preferred to return to his family and his friends.
That night as I went to sleep, I noticed how my mattress, that had always felt rather uncomfortable, felt like a cloud compared to the bed in the hospital. What was even better was that I was sharing it with the most beautiful woman in the world. The very one who snuck me in a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in case they tried make me endure a third day of forced hunger strikes. This brief moment of pain and struggle was nothing compared to what it could have been. I made it out of the hospital. I was feeling quite better than when I went in. I did have a bed to return to. I also had someone extremely special to share it with. It was then I recalled the quote from Gandhi above. No matter how much life seems to be throwing at you, it is throwing a whole lot more at others. Not only that, but it will certainly remind you of all you have to be grateful for that you may have forgotten.
When listening to some biographies and considering some of the people who made the greatest changes in the modern world I came up with a striking conclusion. When we hear the word ‘warrior’ we often think of a physically intimidating person wearing a suit of armor and brandishing a weapon. We think of prolonged episodes of war and violence that bring about revolutions. It is as if we, as human beings, assume it takes these actions to bring about lasting change. I want to take time to introduce you to two people who prove this theory wrong.
The first is Mahatma Gandhi. An Indian lawyer, he certainly was not what you would consider a physically intimidating fellow. In fact, to me he looks like someone’s friendly grandfather. What he seems to lack in physical strength, he more than makes up for in resolve and determination. After receiving his law degree he went on to fight for civil rights in not one, but two different countries. He did this using hunger strikes and other non-violent means. He was arrested several times in both his Native India as well as South Africa. He took on the British government to fight for the self rule of India. When this happened, the country split in two, divided on religious grounds. As you might imagine as people moved to settle in new locations there was much violence. Gandhi again used non-violent means to try and bring the people together. This was so successful that certain parties felt threatened and he was assassinated at the age of 78.
The second warrior I would like to mention is Fred Rogers. That is a picture of him and his wife above. Again, not someone you would fear meeting in a dark alley. Out of all the things that have been said about Fred Rogers, I would be confident to say this is the first time he has ever been referred to as a warrior. How can I call a soft-spoken host of a children’s television program a warrior? He is proof that you do not have to shout or threaten to get your point, and more important your feelings across. He used calming soft-spoken language to take on tough subjects such as anger, death and divorce and make them not only easy to understand, but less scary for young children. That takes a good deal of bravery to do. I have another more poignant example I would like to share with you.
On May 1st of 1969, Mr. Rogers went to face congress. You see earlier that year president Nixon wanted to slash funding for Public Television. Did Fred Rogers stand before congress to scream and fight against this budget cut? Fight? Yes. Scream? Not at all. Fred fought back using a completely different kind of tactic. He stood in front of one of the more stern congressman who would have not only been completely unmoved by shouting, but may have been even more inclined to cut funding. Instead, Fred discussed the importance of offering children a healthy alternative to the violence they regularly saw on television. He shared the benefits of providing them a safe place to express feelings and help deal with some of the scary things we mentioned above. He even demonstrated the benefit each child receives by sharing the lyrics to one of the songs from the children’s show. The result? The congressman said that it was the first time he had goosebumps in quite a while. After hearing what Fred had to say his reply? “Well I guess you earned that 20 million dollars” Fred had not only saved the program from being cut, but the funding was actually increased.
Here are two great men who took on governments, society, civil rights and came out on top. They owe their victories not to great campaigns of violence and oppression, but to the power of love, faith and a belief in what is right and the need to love one’s neighbor. There are many other great heroes and warriors that have taken nonviolent ways of fighting against the world’s problems. Are you one of them?
Above is my favorite quote. It is a guiding principle that I use when I am sharing in the field of self-improvement. When I first set out on this journey, I had little to no idea what I was doing. After over 2 decades of learning and sharing I realized this quote is still one of the most powerful. At seminars I hold, book signings, or even just in personal interaction, people often inquire as to what they can do to change the world. They come with many different motives. Some people have a great deal of hope and ambition. Others, come from a place of frustration. They see the division and hate on television and in the media and really want to do something to make a difference.
My advice to all of these people is the same – focus on changing your corner of the world. This can confuse some and further frustrate many. After all, they want to make a BIG change. I understand that thinking. Daily, I write these blogs and books to help facilitate change throughout the world. The best way to do this is to focus on what we really can change. Like the quote above, be the change you are wanting to see. You wish for a world filled with more love and less hate? Then be a more loving individual. You would be surprised at the effect that can have on others and how quickly it spreads. You wish more people would volunteer to help worthwhile causes? dedicate some of your spare time to doing the same. This may seem like you are making an insignificant difference, but stop and consider this bit of thinking. What if everyone in your city did the same thing? Focused only on doing what they can in their own lives. I live in a town of roughly 60,000 people. Imagine that many people working toward a positive change? Even half of those people, just trying to bring joy and love to those in their circle.
this is not actually Heather
Proof that you attract the people you need in your life, I would like to share an adventure that happened to Margie and I just the other day. We decided to go out for lunch at a local spot we both enjoy. We asked to be seated in a section that had a fun server. We were greeted by Heather, a very pleasant young lady that confessed to being a bit new. As she took our order the conversation turned to the weather outside. It was a particularly cool July afternoon. Weather a lot of folks would enjoy being out in. There was Mention of the vast number of positions and places that were hiring and how we wished there could be a way to connect them to all of the people standing on the corners with signs looking for work. After a contemplative pause, Heather said, “I would stand on a corner with a sign.” Margie and I looked at her with curiosity. She continued, “Yes, I would have a sign asking for change, but not monetary change, social change!” It was then that I knew the three of us would become good friends.
Heather brought up a very good point. Encouraging others for change of a social nature is another great way to improve our corner of the world. I am speaking of asking for change in an encouraging thoughtful manner. Asking your friends to help you with a cause your are volunteering for. Inviting everyone to send a thank you card to one of their friends. Asking strangers to share a smile with someone they don’t know. The best way to encourage this change and make it most likely others will join you? That is to be the change you wish to see in the world!
I know it can be tempting to look for the biggest way in which you can make a change. Just remember often the most powerful way to make a change is to change your own corner of the world. That could include holding a sign asking for positive social change, volunteering for a worthwhile cause, or just sharing a smile with a stranger. Margie and I are thankful to Heather for the great reminder of this important point. We look forward to many good conversations with her in the future!
Welcome back to our celebration of 30 days of gratitude. Each day we will focus on one area of our life to be grateful for. If this is your first day doing this I invite you to go back and do the days before this. You can do them in your head, write them down and home, but it is my hope you decide to share what you are grateful for with our community here on Secret2anamazinglife.com. There are no rules. Do one day or do all 30. Let us now look at today’s area of gratitude.
This can be a difficult one for a lot of us. Body shaming seems to be too popular in the news today. It can seem uncomfortable to mention anything good about our physical appearance. Some of us even feel guilty if we mention any aspect of our body in a positive light. There are those of us who have absolutely no problem doing this, but I digress. Today it seems we are told to focus on what areas of our body may seem ‘unsatisfactory’ by society’s standard and begin at once to work on correcting them.
While it is good to want to be healthy and fit, no matter what your body looks like there are beautiful aspects to it. I think a smile is one of the most beautiful things you can wear. Eyes that sparkle with passion and joy are hard to resist. A heart that is caring and compassionate is truly something to be grateful for. A mind filled with positive solutions and ways to better the world? That would make the gratitude list.
Here is another thing to consider, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Some people prefer people who are tall. Some fancy shorter people. Have hair? Don’t have hair? There is someone who is looking for someone just like you. I know is can be hard when you are not feeling good about the body you have. Trust me when I tell you that you are beautiful just the way you are. If you haven’t heard that from someone in your life lately, you may need to add some new people there. Everyone of us has many beautiful aspects to us. We may have a hard time appreciating them, but they are there and we are beautiful.
If you are having a hard time finding an answer to this one, it might help to ask the love of your life. If you don’t have a special someone in your life, ask a close friend. Blame it on me. “Neil has us doing this gratitude list. What about my body do you think I should be grateful for?” The answer may surprise and delight you. You may discover ways and things about you that you had not thought about appreciating. You may not like the way your feet look, but as Gandhi once said, “I cried because I had no shoes, then I met a man who had no feet.” Even aspects of our bodies we don’t think of. Our nerves that let us sense danger. Pain that alerts us to something being wrong. Our circulatory system that delivers all of the nutrients to the different parts of our body.
As you can see there is so many different ways to approach this question and so many different ways to be grateful for your body. I would love to hear which way you decided to go with your answer.
It is the end of the first week of 2019. As I write this I am sitting in a local Starbucks watching a young lady pace back and forth as she waits for her coffee. The line for the drive-thru was quite extensive. Everywhere people are in a hurry to get what they need and where they are going. I must confess to falling victim to this myself from time to time. The question is when do we stop? You need to get your coffee…on the way to work, let us say. Then you hurry to work to be on time, an issue I seem to have more often than I would like. When you arrive at work you are in a hurry to have the work day end and be on your way home. During the ride home you are in a hurry to just get home so you can relax. Once at home, then we relax right? We hurry to make dinner so we could catch our favorite program, hurry through our household chores so we can finally get to bed and get some well deserved rest. When, at last, we finally find ourselves between the sheets our minds are still racing with thoughts of all we have to do tomorrow. It seems we just drift off into blissful slumber when the alarm clock beckons us to do it all again.
I don’t know about you, but I feel tired just reading that paragraph. The ironic thing about this whole mess is that we do it to ourselves. Time, as Einstein reminded us, is just a stubborn illusion. A better way to explain that is a thought I read on the bottom of a sales ad. how long 3 minutes is depends on what side of the bathroom door you are on. Of course, in at least one of those situations you are still in a hurry. Back to our example of the typical work day. It would seem the adult mind always races to what is next. While it is good to have a goal in mind and be focused on where you are going, it can certainly lead to increased sense of stress and anxiety.
Another thing we do that can leave us chasing time is multitasking. While it may seem like trying to accomplish as many things at once would leave us with more time, the opposite is generally true. The list of tasks in life is always growing and the only thing doing multiple things at once does is diminish the quality of job that we do on each task. It can leave us feeling overwhelmed and looking to ‘catch up’.
What is the solution for all of this? SLOW DOWN. The best way to slow down is to work on being present. Keeping our focus on what we are doing can help us appreciate all that is good about each moment. It will also help us feel less rushed. I know it may seem contrary to think that doing only one thing at a time will lead to more time, but it can. First of all, you do a better job by focusing on one thing at a time. This reduces the amount of time you have to redo things or correct mistakes. By focusing on one thing at a time you decrease the time each task takes. Not to mention it reduces the stress of overwhelm. Less stressed people are more productive people.
There are many ways in which we can learn the art of being present. There is one of my personal favorites, meditation. There are tons of free apps available. Some take as little as 5 to 10 minutes. There are also guided meditation videos on YouTube as well as available on CD. All you have to do is pop on a pair of headphones and relax away. You will emerge from that experience refreshed on more centered.
Another source of teaching on how to be present are children and animals. When we were young, we were much better at being able to appreciate the moment. A child could be lost in a moment of play for hours. As they grow older we teach them not to daydream and to focus on what needs to be done. Turning them into stressed out smaller versions of ourselves. Do yourself a favor and get lost in a moment of play yourself. Better yet, bring along a child to show you how it is done. Animals are the other half of this equation. Pet owners are generally less stressed than their pet-free counterparts. In addition to the love animals give us, they also remind, and sometimes force us to take moments to pause and totally live in the moment. I have watched a dog smell a tree for several minutes, every surface just to get the full story. While I wouldn’t recommend doing this as the neighbors may begin to refer to you as “That neighbor who smells trees” just taking a moment to fully appreciate what we are engaged in will reduce our stress and give us more time.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 