Tag: epictetus

A WAY TO BE WISE 🤔

This is more than some feel good quote. Epictetus, who went from being born into slavery to teacher of philosophy, knew a thing or two about not having a lot. What allowed him to transform his life, and the lives of countless others, was his mindset! We have discussed at length the subject of gratitude on this site. We have done so because it is one of the most powerful tools we can use to transform our life in the quickest period of time. Want to suddenly have a more fulfilling and happy life? Your best bet would be to find as many ways to incorporate gratitude as you can.

Getting back to the quote at hand, what can it tell us about our own life? A good deal. We may not have been born into slavery, but all of us have had our share of hard times. Maybe a job loss or unexpected bill that has set us back. We all have. What makes focusing on what we have verses what we lack so wise? Let us take a look at that. It will help us see that life is really an inner game. What do I mean by this? Let us look at both sides of this quote.

When we focus on lack, life will never feel fulfilling. If we are a person filled with anger and rage and we suddenly win the lottery, have a great spouse and loving kids, what will our life be? It will be one of anger and rage. We spend so much time trying to achieve outer success before focusing on inner thoughts. That is why we see rock stars, movie stars and celebrities who seem to have it all take their own lives and become addicts. They mastered the outer game, but failed at the inner game. If you become rich and successful, but your are unhappy and ungrateful your life will feel like a failure. In reality, it will be.

Conversely, when we focus on what we have we feel fulfilled. This does not mean we will not seek something better. It simply means as we do that we will acknowledge the fact that we have a lot to be grateful while we are pursuing it. When we do receive more, it will feel even more wonderful because we are already living with an attitude of gratitude. It will just give us more to celebrate and feel grateful for. Those focused on lack will never have enough, no matter how much they have. Those who are focused at feeling grateful for what they have will always feel good no matter how little they have.

Can you see the wisdom in this mindset? One feels terrible no matter how good circumstances are. One feels great no matter how terrible circumstances are. Life, at its core, is our emotional state. If we can find a way to be happy regardless of outside circumstances, than our life will be one of joy. That way is through gratitude. After all focusing on what we lack has turned celebrities into addicts. Focusing on what we have has turned a slave into a philosophy teacher. You owe it to yourself, and those around you, to fill your heart with gratitude. It will make you less stressed, happier and more enjoyable to be around. That is a secret to an amazing life!

YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES ✌️

This simple mindset shift transforms life. One feels good. One does not. One makes your life feel good. One does not not. Neither changes events, yet both change your reality. How can reality change if facts do not?

The reality we feel is seldom reality in actuality. Instead, it is a reality as viewed through the lens of our past experiences and our focus. The first we have little control over. The second we have absolute control over. In fact, the only way we can effectively change the past, is by changing the way we view it.

How we do this is simple. Have you had a tragic event in your life? You can view it as the trauma that prevents you from moving forward. Then again, you can view as the reason you developed such resilience. The facts didn’t change, just your response to them and the meaning you assigned them.

In a broader sense, the same applies to life. There are things that appear negative to us. We can choose to view them as so, or we can ask ourselves how we can use them. Can they teach us something? Can they remind us to be grateful for something else? Perhaps, like we mentioned earlier, they can help us be more resilient? The choice is ours. We cannot often change events, but we can change what we decide they mean to us and our reaction to them. More on this next post.

2 STEPS TO A GREAT WEEKEND 👍

This is one of those things that can be all too easily dismissed on the surface. It is so powerful, I do not want you to miss it. Not only is this an over-arching formula to live an amazing life, but it can be broken down to increase your joy and satisfaction in any aspect of your life. We constantly discuss the power of gratitude on this site, but it deserves another look. In fact, it is so powerful that every time you are feeling down, you should give it another look.

How easy it is to focus on what we lack. Society seems to have pushed this narrative. You always should want more. While it is true that you should always want more out of yourself and your life, in terms of bettering them, it should not be at the expense of appreciating what you have. Why is this so important? Forget the law of attraction, forget the spiritual reasons, let us look at this practically today. There are many important reasons that fit into the two previous mentioned categories, I assure you. Today, we are just going to look at how this impacts our everyday world and why it could be so powerful.

Let us begin by asking a question, “How does it feel when you stop and think about everything you want but do not have? Feel free to take a pause from reading this and try it for yourself. If you do not want to take the time to do that, I will let you in on a not-so-secret, it feels terrible. You feel poor. You feel like your life is not complete. You feel like you need more. Businesses like you to feel this way. It keeps you as a passionate consumer. That is why many commercials and ads give you the feeling that your life would not be complete without product x or y. That is nothing but nonsense.

Now let us flip the script here. How does it feel when you focus on everything you are fortunate enough to have in life, even though it may not be exactly what you want? Your car may not be that Bugatti you want, but you have a vehicle that gets you from point A to Point B. You may not be working in your dream job, but you have a way to make income and pay the bills. In the 1930s, this would have been a dream for many. Your relationship can be a great source of anger or frustration at times. Still, you must realize that is because you have someone you love and care for so deeply that they can affect your emotions in such a powerful way. When you focus on all you have, you start to feel prosperous and blessed. There is no greater feeling in the world. Here is the awesome part – no matter what shape your life is in, you can use this formula. There is always, and I mean always, something to be grateful for.

If you are still having problems getting into a state of gratitude, try looking at some of those who would give anything to trade places with you. Boss stressing you out? Talk to someone who is desperately trying to find a job. Your house seems to be experiencing one issue after another? Walk through a homeless camp. In today’s world we still have issues of war, famine and genocide. Trust me when I tell you that our lives are not that bad.

As you look to improve yourself and your lot in life, remember to focus on all that you already have. Having a heart filled with gratitude will decrease your stress and increase your joy quicker and more powerfully than anything else I know.

SUFFER LESS😬

This really is one of the secrets to living an amazing life. Not to spend too much energy on things we cannot control. Instead of worrying about whether someone likes you or not, spend more time on making yourself the best you can be. That way, if anyone doesn’t like you, it is more about them than about you. Most of have heard the saying, “I might not be everyone’s cup of tea.” Here is one to consider. You could be the best cup of tea ever, and there will still be people who don’t like tea. I am a coffee person myself. That is to say, you could be amazing and some people still may not like you. Maybe they have prejudices or preconceived notions that have nothing to do with you.

Another example is focusing on what you can control in an uncontrollable situation. I dislike cold and winter. As I write this, I am looking outside at snow blowing and temperatures below freezing. Try as hard as I might, I cannot control the weather. What I can control is making sure I have warm clothes and a cup of hot coffee, as mentioned above. I also plan trips to warm destinations and try to convince the love of my life that spending the winters in the tropics is a far better idea. It is what I can control in a situation that I cannot control. Focusing on those things instead of trying to change the weather is a lot less stressful and a lot more productive.

Save yourself some stress and focus on what you can change. When you seem to be facing a challenge that is beyond your control, ask yourself, “What can I control in this situation that is beyond my control?” You may not be able to control your job downsizing, but you can control polishing your skills and networking to place yourself in a better position. You cannot control the economy at large, but you can control your own personal economy. Stress less. Worry less. Control what you can.

DON’T EXPLAIN… JUST BE🤔

Have you ever met someone who is always talking a good game? You know the ones. They know what would make a successful life. They know how to get in shape. They know all about healthy eating. They have great wisdom on time management. It would seem a person like this would need a school to teach in.

When you take a close hard look at their life, you discover that they need a fire extinguisher. Why? Because their life is a total dumpster fire. They are full of wisdom and knowledge, but lack action. Knowledge without action is only potential power. If you know what you should be doing, and you are not doing it, you are actually worse off than the ignorant.

This week, hammer out what your philosophy of life is. Than, don’t waste time telling everyone what it is. Instead, think of ways in which you can embody it. What actions do you think would demonstrate your life philosophy? I would love to hear yours in the comments below.