Tag: encouragement

DO NOT CURSE THE SEASONS 🌻

This is a good thought. Every situation does not always serve us in the same way. For example, at my day job I have been working 55 hours a week for the last year. Certainly nice money, but had me burnt out. Now, they hired a coworker for me. It will be a lot less money, but I will be able to focus more on my writing and fitness more.

I could have cursed the fact for the last year I have not been able to spend as much time with Margie as I wanted, or I could have used the extra money to save for our wedding and pay off my car. Conversely, I could lament the fact that I will be earning a lot less or celebrate all the extra time I will be afforded.

Keep this thought in your head. “What is wrong is always available. But so it’s what’s right. ” There is always a sunny side of the street. You can find it when you practice an attitude of gratitude. I always tell people, “If you can’t find something to be grateful for, you aren’t trying very hard. ” Even being able to read these words means you have the gift of vision, access to the internet, and the freedom to view what interests you. We are followed in over 200 countries, but if you live in North Korea, you would not be able to view us.

The above example listed 3 or 4 things you could be grateful for. In any situation there is always something to be grateful for. Sometimes you have to search hard. Most times you do not. So don’t curse the seasons or your situation. Instead, plant and act accordingly. Remember, what is wrong is always available, but so is what’s right.

IS IT A VAMPIRE OR A MIRACLE?

I wrote extensively about what I referred to as “sunshine-challed” people and their negative effect on your life in my first 2 books. There were also tips on how to avoid, or at the very least limit your exposure to these people. As the world gets even busier, our energy is more important than ever.

Why is energy so important? Without enough energy we certainly cannot get all of the things we wanted to get to in life completed. It gets worse than that. Low energy long enough changes our mentality from one of thriving, to one of survival. The reason this is a big deal is that eliminates our zest for living. Who wants to go through life feeling like it is a job? Not me I say!

The solution is to surround yourself with people who feel like a miracle. Ones who fill your soul with not only energy, but hope and passion. You can never have too many of these people in your life. When you find one, make sure to hang on to them!

How do we make sure that we hang onto people who are Miracles in our life? The answer is simple – look to become a miracle in the lives of others. It really is not as difficult as it sounds. In a world that throws a lot of negativity at us, try being a light. Reminding those we care about why they are amazing and what they have to be grateful for is a miracle in itself. If you do this often, people will start showing up for you in much the same manner!

Do you want to surround yourself with what Bob Marley called ’emotional vampires’ or people who are living miracles? Which one are you going to be?

WHY YOU GOT ANOTHER DAY. 😊

Sit with this thought a minute. You might very well be the answer to someone else’s prayers. On my YouTube, which will be updated soon, I end each video with the line, “Remember, the light at the end of the tunnel may be you.” It is a line I stole from an Aerosmith song, but I really like the message behind it.

We can get caught up in our own drama so often we forget this wonderful quote from Einstein. When arguably the smartest man to live tells you that we are here to serve others, you might want to pay attention. Don’t get me wrong, it is easy to get lost in our problems. I have found when this happens, the best way out is to help someone else with their problems. It not only provides perspective, but a sense of purpose.

I often share the great reminder that my friend Kaylene gave me to take the focus off of myself and consider how I can help others. It takes a true friend to remind you of that when you are in the middle of a meltdown. Next time you find yourself down and out, remember you might have been given another day because someone else needs you. Work on finding out who that is!

2 RULES OF THE SPIRITUAL PATH ✨️

I love things that are simple. This is one of those things. When following any spiritual path, these 2 rules should apply. First, you obviously must begin. Dedication to a spiritual path does not need to involve some fancy ritual. It takes place inside of you. Sure, you could go to a secluded place in the woods to meditate, but that is not necessary. A commitment to a new spiritual path, or recommitmemt to a path, can just as easily happen while riding a city bus on the way to work. Neither one is more powerful than the other. The power comes from the commitment in your heart.

Second, you must continue. When you truly dedicate yourself to a spiritual way of being, it is not a if/when proposition. You adhere to the principles of your path whether it is sunny or not. It does not matter if you are dealing with another spiritual person, or someone less-informed. You also continue even if that less-informed person is you. We all stumble. Being spiritual does not mean being perfect. It means being committed. Even if you are imperfect 

Being truly enlightened means understanding that you will stray from the path and occasionally not live up to your standards. It means both giving yourself a little pain when you do, but also being able to forgive yourself and learn from it.

These 2 rules are very important on any journey. You must begin and you must continue.

KEEP BLOOMING 🌻

This is so true. In a world where people are mistakenly focused on material gain and other outward signs of success, it is important to remember where real change starts. If there is anything you wish to accomplish, you must start by becoming it. That may sound backwards to some of you, so allow me to explain.

Real change happens internally. If you do not change who you are inside, that change will usually not be long-lasting. That is why so many who won the lottery end up broke. They have not changed to someone who is comfortable with having a lot of wealth.

You must work on changing your mentality first. If you want to be fit, you must become a person who likes, and is dedicated to fitness. You want to eat healthy? You must become someone who  has a better relationship with food. Someone who understands that you should eat to live and not live to eat. That healthy can be both delicious and fun!

Here is the tricky bit. When you start changing your mentality, you would think everyone would be behind you. Especially, those closest to you. Often, this is not the case. It can be a fear, be that conscious or not, that once you level up you will leave them behind. Sometimes that might have to be the case. When you are working on sobriety, you can’t hang around with addicts anymore. Maybe they just do not possess the drive to improve their lives? A little encouragement and reassurance can go a long way here.

In the end, you might be doing it alone. Quite often, self-improvement is just that – improvement by yourself. Those closest to you might be your most difficult test. Do not stop them from allowing you to bloom!

Quick side note. Be careful not to judge them either. Many people lack either the knowledge or the discipline to improve their lives. Some of the best ways we can help this is to offer encouragement and a positive example of what can be done! It may just be your success that will change their life!

THE REAL FLEX 💯 💪

I belong to a lot of fitness pages online. They serve a great purpose. People sharing their journeys of accomplishing their goals. Emotional and encouraging support for one another. As well as knowledge in regards to the world of health and fitness

One of the things they do is have a day for people to show off the hard work they have put in. In other words, to literally flex their muscles. To me, fitness is a great accomplishment. It shows a discipline that only hard work can accomplish. It involves sacrifice, strong will and dedication. As Zig Ziglar said, “You can’t pay anyone to do your push-ups for you.”

There are some people online who think that wealth and material gain are the ultimate flex. If done ethically, this can be a great accomplishment to be proud of as well. It can show intelligence, hard work and saving. It is still, however, not the ultimate flex.

This, my friends, is the ultimate flex. Making lives better. Inspiring others and giving them a sense of hope and encouragement. In a world that seems to  be telling us that we are not enough, how valuable is it to hear what a difference you make?

One of the most powerful ways to change the world is to just be kind. I realize at first blush this may sound new-age, or even weak to many of you. Far from it. In a world often filled with insults, sarcasm and negativity, how brave is it to stand up and encourage and genuinely compliment someone?

By changing lives and inspiring others to become the best versions of themselves, we are not only doing good by those souls, but by the world at large. By not only encouraging others to be all they can be, but giving them space and permission to be so! You want to impress the world? Show us how many people you have positively impacted. How many lives have you changed for the better?

IS YOUR OPTIMISM FAITH OR FOLLY?🤔

I am an optimist. That should not surprise many of you. Someone who explores the secrets behind an amazing life is bound to be one. What I find interesting is what many people assume that means.

Let us begin by discussing what it does not mean. Many people associate optimism with some sort of Pollyana. As if we are refusing to acknowledge that problems in life exist. That is not optimism, that is denial. Optimism is not chanting happy sounding mantras that we have no emotional attachment to. That is not what true optimism is about. When most people think of an optimistic person, they often associate it with some sort of weakness or Naivete. Again, both not optimism.

What really optimism encompasses, is a belief that things will eventually work out in your favor. That does not mean denying challenges exist, but asking ourselves what they are trying to teach us, and how we can use them to our advantage. It is being honest that things may not be looking the best right now, but we are growing in strength, knowledge and character. This takes some amount of bravery and a great deal of faith. It is a strong person who can keep their eyes on the distant shore, even in the middle of a tempest. Life will provide storms. When you have an optimistic attitude, you do not pretend it is not raining. You summon your emotional fortitude and decide the best way to navigate that storm. You do so with firm belief you will not only make it through the storm, but be better off for it.

Keeping an optimistic attitude will go a great way to determining the actions we will take and the opportunities we will feel confident to take advantage of. It takes no real strength to be a pessimist. Even those who claim they are ‘realists’ are selling themselves short. Yes, life might not always turn out like we wish, or in the time we desire. Without a firm belief that good things will happen, we are a lot less likely to put ourselves out there and to claim all of the good fortune that we deserve.

HAPPINESS CAN BE BITTERSWEET 😔

Last post I discussed taking my aunt back to her old neighborhood. The thought was she would be happy to see some of the old stores and it would give her a special feeling of happiness. That turned out to be only partly true.

Before we get into that, I should explain this neighborhood. I used to do a radio show there many years ago. I would pick up my aunt before and we would leave her apartment to walk the unique shops. At that time there was an independent created newspaper handed out by hippies in dreadlocks. Now it is a glossy magazine called Shepherd Express.

We began by stopping by my aunt’s favorite Chinese restaurant. It soon became apparent that my aunt’s hearing was not what it used to be. I was hoping to reflect more with her and hear her thoughts on what she remembered. Instead, she seemed to exclude herself from most conversations. When we attempted to converse with her, most times her reply was a dismissive “oh yes. ” Even though it was abundantly clear she had not heard what we were discussing.

At the coffee shop, the music was a little too loud to allow much communication even though we were sitting right next to each other. It was also all of the walking she could handle for the day. Any hopes of reliving the actions of days gone by quickly faded. 

After leaving my aunt that evening, it really hit me that the memory of exploring with my aunt would forever be that – a memory. There had been countless times both of us had talked about doing it, but as happens, life got in  the way. Now, she was no longer physically capable of doing it.

This may seem like a melancholy post. In some ways it is, but it has a message. If there are things you want to experience, do them now! Do not let life get in the way. If there is conversations you want to have with loved ones, even if it is reminiscing about going into occult shops and seeing all the wild stuff they have, do it now. You never know what, or when, time will steal the opportunity from you.

WE MADE IT! WE SHOULD NOT HAVE WAITED ✋️

It is Friday! The day so many of us wait for. In some ways, seeing this makes me glad that I work 7 days a week. That may sound crazy to many of you but let me explain. When it comes to planning dates with my beautiful lady, or maybe just treating myself to a bit of self-care like a good cup of coffee and a book, I do not wait for the weekend, as I will be working. I carve little bits of time whenever and wherever I can find them. Quite often we go on a date on a Thursday evening. Maybe I will take Tuesday after work to stop by the local coffee shop and get lost in the current novel I am reading.

The point of all of this is that I do not wait for the weekend, 5 o’clock or any other designated time. Do not misunderstand me, when I go on vacation, I am on vacation. It is more important to find joy in the life you are living rather than working to escape it. When you wait for the weekend, you are essentially resigning yourself to the fact that 5 out of 7 days will be a burden and lacking joy. Can you imagine giving anyone else that advice?

How do we create a life that we do not need a vacation from? By doing the things we preach on this site. Practice gratitude. Be present. Understand that we do not get more life. Time is truly our most precious commodity. Once it is gone, it is gone forever. One day will be your last. Before that day, you will witness the last days of many of the people you love and care about. This is not to sound depressing, but to impress upon you the urgency of changing your perspective of life now. Coming home to Margie is a blessing I am grateful for everyday. One day, it will be the last time we come home to each other. Saturday I am having coffee with my good friend Nick. By listening to him, feeling and expressing the gratitude for the friendship we share will help me be present and fully appreciate the moment. I never know how many more coffees we will share.

How about you? Are you putting off your joy until you reach the destination or are you working on ways to enjoy the journey?

HEY YOU! JOHNNY APPLESEED! 🍎🍏

Have you ever heard of Johnny Appleseed? This may surprise many of you, but he was a real person. His name was John Chapman. He was an American nurseryman. Meaning he looked after young plants, not young humans. He was famous for introducing large parts of North America to trees grown from apple seeds. He was a very successful business man who ended up owning over 1200 acres of land by the time of his death. He shared his knowledge and seeds with many different people. He would plant a nursery, move on and come back a few years later to check on it. Cute story, but what does that have to do with living an amazing life?

We can be our own Johnny (Or Janie) Appleseed. What we can do is spread seeds of inspiration, hope and empowerment. I use the example of Johnny Appleseed, and planting seeds in general for 2 very important reasons. First, we must keep in mind no matter how pure our intentions, we should not try to change other people. Planting a seed is just that. You give them the opportunity to let it grow within themselves. What they do with it is their responsibility. They can water or fertilize it, or they can let it die. All of that is up to them. We must keep this perspective to help us from becoming disillusioned when our efforts to help someone improve their life do not seem to be working. We are planting a seed. Different seeds grow at different rates. It has a lot to do with both the seed itself, as well as the environment. The same can be said with the seed of self-improvement, encouragement or whatever else you are planting.

That leads us to our second reason for using this metaphor. You may want to stop by after some time and see how the seed you planted is coming along. If it does not seem to be blossoming, there may be several reasons. It may be growing slowly. It could use some extra help, or just some extra time. Maybe it did not take root at all? You may need to plant some more seeds or find more fertile ground. Just remember, the more seeds you plant, the more likely they are to grow. Spread the seeds of love, kindness and compassion wherever you go. You could even wear a pot on your head like Johnny Appleseed if you think it would help.