A HIGH SCHOOL REUNION AND TWO OLD MEN

A customer came into the post office the other day to mail thank you cards to people who showed up to her 40th high school reunion.  She had nothing to do with the planning of the event and stated quite simply, “I just wanted to thank them for showing up and being kind to me”.  Not only do I think it is a marvelous idea to sit down and write people a proper thank you letter, but she said something that impressed me even more.  She stated that everyone she met seems to have turned out so nice, but some people she spoke with after told her they had the opposite experience.  Even though they talked to the same people.  How could this be? How could two people go to the same event, talk to the same people, but have entirely different results?  There are many factors I suppose, but it reminded me of a story I heard that I would like to share with you.

Two old gentleman were sitting outside of a local diner discussing how the neighborhood was changing and a lot of new people were moving in.  Suddenly their conversation was interrupted by just one of those people.  “Excuse me, but you look like you may have been a member of this neighborhood a while. What are the people like here?”.  That was the question put forth to the old men.  “Well what were the people like in the town you came from?” replied one old man.  “Oh they were very nice.  In fact, we were sad to leave, but my husband’s job had us relocate here” was the reply from the new neighbor.  “Well there is no need to worry, I believe you will find the people just as pleasant down here” replied the old man.  She thanked them and was off.  Well in the middle of a heated debate as to the fate of the local college football team the old men were interrupted by another new neighbor asking the same question.  Again the old man replied by asking what the people were like where the individual came from. “They were terrible.  Never friendly, rarely said hi to us.  That is why we moved here in hopes of finding a nicer group of people”  replied the young man.  “I’m sorry to tell you, but you wasted your time.  I’m afraid you will find the people the same here” replied the old man. The new neighbor left shaking his head.  Well now the other old man couldn’t help but ask how he could give two completely different answers to the same question and which one he believed was the right answer.  “They both are.” he replied.  “People will find just what they are looking for. It has to do with a great deal in how they see the situation.”

Now I like this story, and it brings up a good point.  People often do find what they expect to find. Unfortunately there are people who have no expectations and wait for the world to dictate to them how the situation will be.  Even worse, there are people who expect the worse in every situation.  Have you ever heard someone say “Expect the worse and you will never be disappointed”?  Not only is this a very dismal and cowardly way to go through life.  Effectively saying you have no control over how things turn out, but it is also negating one of our greatest powers.  If you enter a situation or even a day expecting it to be a good day, chances are you will have more good than bad happen.  Even if some things do not go as planned, they are easier to take in stride and quite often may be part of a greater plan.  If you approach ever day with anxiety and expecting the worse, you will quite often find yourself correct. There are a million reasons why this is so, and we shall discuss them another day.  We must ask ourselves, what feels better expecting joy and experiencing the occasional disappointment or glumly expecting the worse and being occasionally pleasantly surprised? I can tell you the attitude I would rather bring to life.  The important thing here to realize is we have the power to choose, or to leave it to chance.

ARE YOU SUCCESSFUL?

For years I always wondered what the secret to success was.  I read books to learn.  Listened to cds, went to seminars and workshops trying to find this elusive piece of inspiration.  Never quite felt that ‘I had it’.  So I began to listen to friends, co-workers and customers who I felt embodied success.  Strangest thing was, a lot of them said they were unsuccessful and searching for the secret to success as well.  It was quite by accident, or perhaps fate, that this all changed.  I stumbled upon this secret when I asked one of these people whom I considered quite successful what I considered a simple question. What is the definition of success?  He looked at me quizzically and replied “you know I don’t really know”.  The fact was, neither did I.  How on earth was I ever to find the secret of success when I didn’t even have a personal definition of what it meant to me.  Ask yourself, what does success mean to you?  Is it being a caring parent?  A loving spouse perhaps?  obtaining a certain income or place in your business?  Although these are all very worthwhile goals they all have one fatal flaw.  After you reach them, then what?  Are you then successful?  Is the game over?

Allow me to share with you the best definition of success I have ever heard.  It was from Earl Nightingale. Long before the movie ‘The Secret” or law of attraction was so in fashion,  Earl was the first person to ever receive a gold record for spoken word.  The piece was called “the Strangest Secret” I encourage you all to check it out.  In it, Mr Nightingale describes success as this  “The progressive realization of a worthy ideal”.  What does this mean exactly?  Well let us take the goal of being a great parent.  If that is your goal and you are working towards it, then by all accounts you are a success.  Now what if you make a mistake?  Well that is part of the journey as well, we learn from our mistakes.  So you are even more of a success.  Let me get a little more personal.  My goal is to have a daily blog that is viewed across the globe (six countries so far) that brings positivity and a rewarding life to all who read it.  I also am working on a book of the same design.  Now does that mean I will only be a success when my book is printed and my blog is read in every country?  Not hardly.  I have my goal and am working toward it,  so now I consider myself a success.

So today think about your goal.  What is your life’s ambition.  Write it down so you can see it every day.  Keep in your mind’s eye as you go about your day.  Know as soon as you do this you are already a success. Soon paths that you never would have seen shall open up and you will be on your way. If you need a little encouragement or a good solid plan I suggest you check out “The Strangest Secret” available at nightingale.com.  Here’s to all of us being a success!